


A Song Without Words

by StarFromPhoenix



Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drama & Romance, Eventual Romance, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, My Own Fantasy, Rape/Non-con Elements
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-07
Updated: 2019-07-27
Packaged: 2019-09-02 21:12:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 49
Words: 118,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16794829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarFromPhoenix/pseuds/StarFromPhoenix
Summary: 17 year old Damianos (Damen) Akielos has 10 months before he turns 18 and can age out of the foster care system. He’s content in the quiet home he’s in, when he gets the not so pleasant surprise that he’s going to be fostered by the wealthy De Vere family. Suddenly, he’s in a home that feels like a gilded cage and dealing with a hostile 16 year old Laurent De Vere.A modern AU, born out of my wild imagination and my love for Laurent!Please don’t repost my work without my permission =)I don’t own these characters, but boy do they own me! Enjoy!





	1. I

It was around 11 am, on a mid August morning in picturesque Rhode Island. Damen was mowing the lawn when he saw the old brown Buick pull up. His stomach dropped. Not again. He turned the lawn mower off, leaned against it and let out a sigh. He wiped the sweat off his forehead.

Damen was 17 and had been in foster care since his father’s untimely death four years prior. He was the only child of an only child and Damen had no family to go to. He had been in foster home after foster home since then. Some were easier to leave than others. This one would be hard to leave. He had been here almost six months already and was very hopeful he would be able to stay until he turned 18. The older lady who was fostering him had expressed willingness to keep him. Why was his case worker here now?

“Damianos! How are you?” Gordon asked calling out to him. Reluctantly Damen made his way across the lawn to the driveway to shake his hand and greet him. Miss Daisy came out of her front door. She looked as surprised and confused as Damen felt.

“Gordon. Hi, we weren’t expecting you,” she said. “Please come in.”

They all made their way inside. After pleasantries and small talk was exchanged, all three sat down in Miss Daisy’s living room. The uneasiness in Damen was growing.

“I wasn’t expecting to be here either,” Gordon said. “I honestly thought Damen would be here till he aged out but, we got a peculiar request.”

Damen furrowed his brow. “Oh?” Miss Daisy asked.

“Mr. De Vere contacted us and said he was wanting to foster a 17 year old boy. He said he would pay to send him to the private school his 16 year old nephew attends. He requested a boy of 17 so he could be a positive influence to his nephew. He asked me to please send the most well behaved boy we have,” he said quietly.

“Mr. De Vere?” Miss Daisy asked.

Everyone knew the De Vere name. The family was rich and made even richer by the successful line of hotels he and his brother had opened. He didn’t have any children of his own but had taken guardianship of Laurent and his older brother Auguste when the boy’s father, had died a few years back. The cause of death was not quite know. It was a disease but it had been kept very private even though it had been all over the papers for weeks.

Damen remember the pictures of Laurent and Auguste, 10 and 15 years old respectively, orphans. Their mother had passed before Laurent had turned two. He remembered articles speaking of the loving uncle taking guardianship of them. Damen also clearly remembered the picture of Laurent, a slim boy, his hair so blond against the black of the suit he was wearing. Little did Damen know, just 18 months later he would be dealt the same fate.

“Yeah,” Gordon said. “De Vere.” There was a finality with which he said the name, as if he had no choice but to comply.

“Wow. And he’ll send you to a private school to graduate from, Damen,” Miss Daisy said with a smile. “That’s a lot more than I could ever offer you.”

Damen stayed quiet. What Miss Daisy could offer and had been giving him these last months had no price. “Could I visit you sometime?” Damen asked.

“Anytime, sweetie,” was her reply.

* * *

Damen looked out the window. A car had been sent for him to be picked up. All he saw was the blur of trees. He could see his reflection. He looked at his chin length curly hair that framed his face. He had a kind face, he had been told many times over. He had olive skin, brown eyes underneath dark brows, a straight nose that turned up just slightly at the tip and full lips. He had medium stubble in the shape of a goatee and along his jaw. He had thought of shaving as he had showered earlier but decided to leave it. With his facial hair he looked a few years older than his 17 years of age. That, along with his muscular physique made him look as if he was about 19, maybe even 20. Damen didn’t mind. It had prevented many a bully from picking fights with him.

After the news, Damen only had a couple of hours to get ready. He had showered and pulled on jeans, a white tee shirt and black combat boots. He had hugged Miss Daisy and hadn’t cried, even though he wanted to and even though she had.

“I’m gonna visit, remember?” He had said, trying to console her. She had nodded and given him a kiss on the cheek. She was the closest he had come to feeling like he was in a home and in a family in all the years since his father had passed. This hurt.

He pulled himself out of his memories. The car pulled into a long driveway. He looked out and tried to see what the home looked like. Suddenly it came into view. It was enormous. It almost looked like a small castle. It was a huge Tudor style home. Beautiful beige stone underneath off white stucco, wooden beams and a gray roof. Damen was a bit taken aback. 

Once the car had stopped he got out. He zipped up his black leather jacket, a gift from Miss Daisy back on his birthday in May. The driver had gotten out and was at the trunk of the car. He took out Damen’s duffle bag and his back pack. All that Damen owned were in those two bags.

“I’ll take them,” Damen said. 

“Oh, no sir it’s quite alright,” the driver said and they walked into the huge home. 

Damen looked around the entrance hallway. The floor was marble and there was beautiful wood paneling on the walls with beautiful intricate detail carved into them. Straight ahead were double curving staircases, a marble statue against the wall between them. The driver had left his bags by the door and had gone. Damen wasn’t sure where to go.

He heard the sounds of steps on the marble floor and suddenly an older lady in a plumb colored suit and heels walked to him. Her hair was in a tight bun. “Damianos,” she said. She wasn’t asking. Damen nodded. “I’m Miss Paschal, Mr. De Vere’s assistant. Welcome and please make yourself at home. Dinner will be served at six sharp. Don’t be late. Your bags will be taken up to your room. You’re down the right hallway, third door.”

She spoke very quickly and Damen almost felt dizzy listening to her. He nodded.

“The sitting room is there,” she pointed to the right. “Past it is the library and then the music room. Laurent is in the music room. Go introduce yourself. Mr. De Vere will see you at dinner.”

Just like that she was gone. Go introduce myself? Damen looked around. Shouldn’t it be the other way around? Damen shook his head and walked into the sitting room. He took his time. He had never been in a place like this. It almost looked as if no one lived there. There were expensive rugs on the wooden floor and paintings on the walls. There was a huge marble fireplace, almost as tall as him and he was 6’2. He walked into the following room, the library. Wood paneling and wood floors all around. Expensive upholstered high back chairs by small tables and lamps and expensive wooden bookcases as if custom made for this room.

Damen enjoyed reading. He was looking at the book titles when he became aware of faint music. As he moved through the large library it got louder. He remembered Miss Paschal had said Laurent was in the music room. Damen’s curiosity got the best of him and he finally let himself wonder about Laurent. So, the uncle said the boy needed a positive influence. Damen didn’t think he fit the bill. He walked to the door leading to the music room and opened it slowly.

The sound of beautiful violin music came through. Damen recognized the song. His father had loved classical music. It was Tchaikovsky’s A Song Without Words. He laid his eyes upon the back of a young slender man. It had to be Laurent. He was all in black. His hair was golden and fell onto his shoulders. It swayed side to side as he expertly played the violin. Someone was accompanying him on piano. Damen’s eyes were glued to the back of Laurent. Finally the song was over and Laurent suddenly turned. 

Damon’s breath caught in his throat. The best way to describe Laurent was... androgynously beautiful. His skin was fair and his face, although masculine with a strong jaw, still looked delicate and smooth. His full lips were in a tight line, which pulled them taught. He had a long slender neck. All this was framed by long blond hair. It shone golden wherever the light hit. It fell in layers around his face perfectly and effortlessly as if his hair just did that all by itself. His eyes were blue and cold beneath light brown eyebrows and he made a face when he saw Damen, as if he had smelled something disagreeable. His nose was slightly broad and straight.

“Who the fuck are you?” He asked with authority. He had lowered his violin. He had black fitted jeans and black combat boots, like Damen, except his probably cost ten times more than the ones Damen had on. He had a button up long sleeved black shirt. “Answer me!” He demanded.

Damen snapped out of his daze. “Damianos,” He said. 

“Oh! You’re my uncle’s charity case. Go away. I’m not done practicing yet.” And with that he turned his back to Damen again.

Damen turned and walked out of the room. The music began again. He stood in the library, heart pounding and panting slightly. What the hell has just happened? Laurent was... beautiful, but rude. Fucking spoiled brat, Damen thought. What a waste to have such beauty on such a horrible person, Damen thought further.

He suddenly felt bad for feeling that way. He had lost his father too and Laurent had been even younger than him. That must have been so hard. He shook his head. Damen felt drained. He decided to go find his room.

He quickly walked back the way he came and went up the stairs. He turned right and down the hallway, entering the third door. His bags were there. The room was a nice size. Queen sized bed and a desk with a pc. There was a tv mounted across from the bed and a stereo below it. There was pretty blue wall paper with what looked like golden starbursts on it above half wood paneled walls. He sighed.

Damen took off his boots and jacket and plopped down on the bed. He threw his left forearm over his eyes. This was going to be a long ten months. He hoped he could make it. Worse case scenario, he would just run away.

* * *

Damen awoke with a start. It took him a second to remember where he was. The room was darkened since barely none of the late evening sun was shining in. He started to sit up when he suddenly became aware of the figure at the end of his bed, sitting with his legs crisscrossed. His forearms were on his knees. Damen sat up, staring at him.

“What are you doing in my room?” Damen asked.

“This is my house,” Laurent replied. “So technically this is my room.”

“This is your uncle’s house,” Damen said.

“No. This was my father’s. This is now mine. When I’m 21 I will come into my inheritance and I will own this home and kick all the vermin out of it,” Laurent replied. Damen was surprised by the poison in his words.

“Ok, fine,” Damen said shortly. He seriously didn’t need the attitude. “What do you want?”

“You and I are going to come to a little understanding,” Laurent said. His blue eyes bore into Damen. “My uncle is going to send you to my school come September.He’s going to ask you to spy on me and report to him in exchange of... whatever,” Laurent said.

Damen was confused. “Why would -“

“You don’t get to ask questions! I’m just here to tell you, that you will tell him yes and then I’ll tell you what information to feed him.” Damen stared at Laurent in disbelief. Was this Laurent’s idea of a sick joke? “Do you understand?!” Laurent demanded. 

Damen furrowed his brow. “Why would I agree to help you?” He asked.

“Because I’ll make your life miserable if you don’t,” Laurent said with no emotion. He gracefully got off the bed in one fluid motion, turned and walked out of Damen’s room without another word or without bothering to look back at Damen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you wanted to know how I picture the boys:
> 
> [Damen](https://starfromphoenix.tumblr.com/post/180881722772%E2%80%9D%20rel=)
> 
> [Laurent](https://starfromphoenix.tumblr.com/post/180881584797%E2%80%9D%20rel=)


	2. II

Damen had waited until the last possible moment to go downstairs for dinner. He exited his room at 5:59. As he quietly closed the door behind him, he heard another door open up. He glanced back and saw Laurent exit his room. Damen watched him for just a moment. His long blond hair even flowed perfectly as he walked. Damen looked away and walked down the hallway and down the stairs. Laurent kept a few paces behind him.

Once at the bottom of the stair Damen realized he didn’t know where the dining room was.

“This way,” Laurent said as he walked to the room across the hall from the sitting room. It had a pool table and bar. Damen saw plush leather couches with a huge flatscreen on the wall, several game systems bellow. They walked past it and into a dining room. The table long, able to seat 12 and three places had been set.

One at the head of the table and the two adjacent. Damen expected Mr. De Vere to have to spot at the head of the table so he took the one on the left side of it. Laurent sat across from him. The dining chairs had arm rests and Damen saw Laurent lean back, arms in each arm rest, looking bored. He ran his right hand through his hair, blond hair falling to the side.

Laurent blinked and his gaze was suddenly on Damen. Damen didn’t look away. Laurent furrowed his brow slightly as they stared at one another. Laurent’s nose was perfectly straight and his lips just the perfect amount of fullness. There was a little shadow underneath his bottom lip that made it look more full. His jaw was perfectly square and his face was perfectly smooth, as if he had no facial hair yet. His neck was long and slender, as was all of him. He was all covered up though, in his long sleeve black shirt, every button done up. Not a word was spoken.

A young woman came in and started to remove the plates at the head of the table.

“Leave them,” Laurent said. He got up and sat at the head of the table. She moved around and removed the plates where Laurent had been sitting. “You’ll soon realize my dear uncle doesn’t give a fuck about your well being,” he said cooly. “We’re expected to be home for dinner but he’ll more than likely never be here for it. Better for us though.”

“Then why foster me? I was happy where I was,” Damen said angrily. He didn’t look at Laurent.

Laurent made a noise as if he had breathed out his nose. “Oh? Was their house nicer than mine?”

“It was a home,” Damen said, suddenly feeling protective of Miss Daisy. “Not a gilded prison,” he added.

Laurent said nothing in return. The same young woman came out, joined by a few more and Laurent and Damen were served dinner. It was a delicious roast with baked potato and a salad. Damen was surprised when wine was brought to the table. They each got a glass.

“Don’t get too excited we’re only allowed a glass each,” Laurent said drily.

“I don’t want it. May I have some water, please,” Damen told the young woman attending them.

Laurent looked at him in surprise. “You can have more than water. Anything,” he said.

Damen blinked in surprise. “Strawberry lemonade?” He asked.

Laurent nodded. He looked at the woman and she nodded and walked away with his wine glass. After a moment his strawberry lemonade was brought out. Damen could feel Laurent’s eyes on him. “Was my wine not good enough for you?” He asked.

Damen let out a slow breath. Of course, someone as vain as Laurent would imagine the whole world revolved around him. “I don’t drink. I will never drink. Ever,” Damen said.

“Why?” 

“A drunk driver killed my father,” Damen replied without much emotion. It hurt but he had learned not to show it. He was tired of people saying they were sorry because they didn’t know what else to say. 

“Was it sudden?” Laurent asked.

“What?” Damen asked looking into his piercing blue eyes. 

“Did he die on impact?” Laurent asked. “My father was sick for weeks. They kept sending him to specialists after specialist but nothing improved. Finally he had a heart attack and died. He was in the hospital for three weeks.”

Damen had been looking at Laurent as he spoke. Suddenly he realized why people said sorry. Except, had he said it, he would have actually meant it. He didn’t say it though. “He died on impact,” Damen told him. Laurent just nodded. He didn’t say sorry either.

* * *

They hardly spoke the rest of dinner. Once he was done Laurent just got up and left without a word to Damen. The young woman that had made Damen’s pink lemonade had come out to collect the plates and had been surprised to see Damen. She had smiled and asked him if he wanted some dessert. Damen had smiled and nodded. She was very pretty and very young, 18 or 19 the most he thought.

He followed her to the kitchen. It was humongous. Two chef’s stoves and three different refrigerators. It seemed like too much. “Its excessive isn’t it?” She asked in a low whisper. 

“Yes,” Damen said. She gave him some chocolate ice cream. Damen watched her as she put the ice cream away. “How old are you?” He asked her. 

“Nineteen,” she said quietly. She looked back at him and smiled. “You?”

“Old enough,” Damen said. 

“Finish your ice cream first,” she said with a smile.

* * *

Damen was walking up the stairs to his room. His legs still felt a little shaky. The maid’s name was Eloise. She had gotten a condom from her purse as Damen finished his ice cream and she had taken him to the bathroom down the hall. It had been fun. She told him to exit first, and he heard her lock the door behind him.

He decided to shower before bed. He suddenly realized he wasn’t sure where a bathroom was upstairs. He also realized he had no towels. He went into his room. There was a large closet there. It had a bathrobe and towels. He grabbed both. He stepped out into the hallway. His was the third door. The last door was Laurent’s bedroom.

There was a door across the hallway. He opened it. It was indeed a the bathroom. Laurent was in the tub, hair in a bun, which looked really good on him. He had AirPods in his ears. He slid one off as he looked towards Damen. 

“Hey,” he said nonchalantly.

“Hi. Sorry,” Damen said and made to leave.

“Wait!” Laurent called out. The tub was white and large with gold claw feet. Laurent moved to the side, he crossed his arms over the curved side of the tub, soapy water splashing out and hitting the marble floor beneath. He was slender but Damen could see the defined muscles in his arms. The walls were a very pretty blue. Laurent had a huge smile on his face. “The downstairs bathroom window was open so I heard when you fucked Eloise,” Laurent said. Damen felt himself blush. “She fucks the gardener too and he looks sketchy so, I really hoped you used a condom and even if you did, I’d still go get checked out,” Laurent said. 

Damen stared at him. “Is there another bathroom I can use?” He asked.

“Yeah! The very first door. That’s shower only though. But you want a shower right?”

“Right,” Damen said.

“Yeah, good idea. Make sure you scrub real well, not sure if soap kills crabs though,” Laurent said with a huge smile. He leaned back on the tub and slid the AirPod back on. Damen turned to walk out.

* * *

Damon laid in bed. His lights were off and everything was quiet. He couldn’t sleep. He thought he could call Gordon tomorrow. He could call him and tell him he couldn’t stay here. He wanted to go back to Miss Daisy. Or, Damen could just run away. _Who_ would stop him? _Who_ could physically stop him? Laurent was shorter and way skinnier than him. 

He suddenly imagined punching Laurent in the face. He imagined the bright red blood running down his chin. Damen would enjoy it. He clenched his fists and shook his head. He wasn’t going to ever be as cruel or as petty as Laurent. He was a better person than that. His father had raised him better than that. 

“Just ten more months,” Damen whispered to himself. “Just ten more months.” After a long while, sleep finally found him.


	3. III

Damen awoke the next morning but laid in bed well into mid morning. He finally got up because he was starving. The day was sunny and the sky was blue, not a could in the sky. He got up and looked out his window. A pool came into view. Damen smiled, he was good at pretty much all sports and he thought he would enjoy swimming laps in the pool. Ok, if he was stuck here he may as well make the best of it. He thought of the library with all the books.

He pulled on his jeans and this time a red tee shirt and some sneakers. He walked downstairs and to the dining room. It was empty. He made his way to the kitchen. Eloise was there, as well as an older man on the stove and another woman chopping vegetables.

“Hey,” Damen said to Eloise, friendly smile on his face.

“Hey, you missed breakfast,” she said. “Breakfast is at 8, lunch at 12:30 and dinner at 6. Mr. De Vere asked about you but Laurent told him you were ok and settling in.”

Damen nodded. He wasn’t sure what to think. “Yeah, I slept in. I’m hungry though,” Damen said. He wondered if he could just go to a fridge to get himself something to eat.

“I’ll make you anything you want. They had bacon and eggs this morning, I can make you some of that. I can get you a fruit salad, or make you a smoothie? It’ll be lunch in less than 2 hours,” she said.

“A smoothie will be good,” Damen said nodding. He chatted with Eloise as she prepared it for him.

“There is a white hamper in your closet,” she told him. “Laundry is taken every Thursday and returned to you every Friday,” she explained. Damen nodded. They chatted a bit more and when he was done his smoothie she took the glass. Damen walked out the kitchen and decided to go to the library. He had been there for only a moment when Laurent walked in.

He still had his hair up, sloppy bun on top of his head, some strands framing his face. It looked perfect, of course. He had dark gray sweatpants and a matching high collared long sleeved zip up sweater. Black high top sneakers with a thick white sole. He had his violin case in his hand.

“Practicing more Tchaikovsky today?” Damen asked turning back to the books.

Laurent was quiet a moment. “I require an accompanying piano for that song,” Laurent said. “I’m practicing alone today.”

Damen pulled out Heart of Darkness from the bookshelf. “Oh,” he replied.

Laurent was still standing in the same spot. Damen sat on one of the upholstered chairs in the library. “You like classical music?” Laurent asked.

“Yeah,” Damen said looking up at him. “My father liked it a lot and so I grew up listening to it.” He opened up the book. He had begun to read it a while back at the foster home before Miss Daisy. He never got to finish it. He looked up again and noticed Laurent hadn’t moved. He wasn’t looking at Damen though, he was looking at the floor.

“Join me in the music room,” Laurent said. It wasn’t a question, but Damen figured this was the closest Laurent got to asking. Damen considered it a moment. He got up and followed Laurent to the music room.

The room was large and bright. There was a beautiful grand piano and a music stand nearby. There was a loveseat against the wall. Damen slowly walked to it. He sat on it and looked at Laurent.

“Any requests?” Laurent asked. He waited a few seconds before he made eye contact with Damen.

“Bach,” Damen answered quietly. Damen liked anything Bach.

Laurent looked pleased by this and took his violin out. “BWV 1003, Allegro, sonata number 2,” Laurent said in his aloof tone.

Damen watched as Laurent started playing the fast paced song expertly. Damon watched as Laurent closed his eyes and looked peaceful as he played, in spite of the song’s difficulty. Laurent’s fingers moved without hesitation, as if he had played this song hundreds of times and without mistakes. He probably had, Damen thought. He clapped when the song ended and Laurent looked pleased.

Laurent played several more songs after, telling Damen the name of each before he played. Damen sat quietly and listened. He enjoyed it. Laurent was very talented and Damen clapped and offered compliments after each song had ended. Once he had stopped, Laurent went and sat beside Damen in the love seat. Damen was a bit surprised by it. He hadn’t expected Laurent to want to be this close. 

“My father took me once to a concert, classical music. First and only time though, it was less than a year before he died,” Damen told Laurent. He wasn’t sure what made him share this memory, he said this without thinking much about it.

“Did your father like Bach?” Laurent asked.

“My father liked Bach,” Damen answered. Damen suddenly felt emotional and he didn’t want to show it in front of Laurent. He got up and started walking out of the music room. He cleared his throat when he reached the door. “Thank you,” Damen said, not looking back at Laurent and walked out. 

* * *

Damen was laying in his bed. He had taken his shirt and shoes off and was in his jeans, Heart of Darkness open and laying on his chest. He hadn’t been able to read much. Memories of his father and the home he had kept flooding him. He wasn’t crying though. He had cried enough. His father wouldn’t want him crying all the time.

He threw his left forearm over his eyes and he breathed in and out slowly and deliberately. He heard the soft click of his bedroom door and he sat up. Laurent walked in and shut the door behind him. His hair was down now, layers framed his face, it fell softly on his shoulders. Laurent walked into his room, in front of the bed and sat down at the foot of it. His back was to the bedroom door now, and he was looking out the window.

“Don’t you think you should knock first?” Damen asked.

“It’s my home, I don’t need to knock,” Laurent said.

“I could have been -“

“Masturbating? I doubt it. Eloise is very much available,” Laurent said quickly and without much emotion.

Damen blinked. “I was going to say undressed.”

Laurent ignored this remark. “I thought I’d remind you about lunch since you missed breakfast,” he said.

Damen let our a breath and put the book face down on the bed. Laurent looked at it and then glanced at Damen. Damen was up and was slipping his tee shirt back on. “Ok,” he said.

“There was something I wanted to show you,” Laurent said. He turned and walked out of Damen’s room. Damen felt he had no choice but to follow him. Laurent was walking quite briskly but Damen kept up. They quickly jogged down the stairs and then past the dining room and through the door that led to the hallway with the bathroom and kitchen. He kept walking to the end though and Damen saw there was another staircase there. They descended.

The walked into a brightly lit room, one side all mirrors. Damen saw it was a gym. “Wow,” He said as they made it to the bottom.

“You, look like you work out or whatever so, thought I’d show you,” Laurent said.

Damen looked at him grinning. Laurent pursed his lips together as if holding back a smile. “Do you work out?” Damen asked him. He remembered how his arms had looked defined last night. He remembered them very clearly.

“I fence,” Laurent said.

“Fence?” Damen asked him.

“Yes, like with a foil or saber,” Laurent said looking at Damen as if he had two heads.

“Yes, yes, I know, I was just surprised,” Damen said.

“Why?” Laurent asked.

“Just forget it,” Damen said. He shook his head. He had been surprised in a pleasant way. He was sure watching Laurent fence was... pleasing to the eye.

Laurent rolled his eyes. “Idiot,” he murmured under his breath and brushed past Damen and started jogging up the stairs. Damen had stayed put and was looking at the equipment in the room. “Hurry up! It’s time for lunch!” Laurent called from the top of the stairs.

Damen gave one last look the the gym, turned and jogged up the stairs behind Laurent.


	4. IV

Lunch was amicable and Laurent was more talkative. Damen let him lead the conversation, so as to keep it going.

“So is your favorite composer is Bach?” He asked.

“I think I prefer Beethoven,” Damen said.

“You think?” He arched a perfect eyebrow. Damen looked over his face. He really was good looking. Damen looked down at his plate. Grilled salmon and asparagus. It was delicious.

“Well, my favorite piece is The Four Seasons,” Damen said with a shrug. “It’s slightly cliche -“

“Not at all. It’s a beautiful arrangement,” Laurent agreed. Damen looked up at him. They held gazes for a moment and then Damen looked away. He ate the rest of his lunch in mostly silence and only spoke when Laurent asked a direct question, which was only a few times.

Once they were done eating, Damon got up and started walking out of the dining room. He thought he would read a moment and let his food settle and then he would decide if he wanted to swim or work out.

“Would you like to go for a swim?” He heard behind him as he reached his bedroom door. Damen turned back and saw Laurent leaning against the wall, about four feet from Damen’s door.

“Yeah, I actually was thinking I wanted to, just was gonna let my food settle.”

Laurent nodded. “We could go lay outside, we have lounges by the pool side.

“Ok,” Damen said. Then he remembered. “I don’t have a -“

“It’s ok,” Laurent said nonchalantly. “My older brother, Auguste...” Laurent trailed off. He turned and walked to the second door, he motioned for Damen to follow. Damen entered the doorway but only took a few more steps inside. “He’s at Harvard,” Laurent said and walked to a dresser. “He’ll be home in nine days for Labor Day weekend,” Laurent said with a smile. Damen stared. It was a real, genuine smile. “He’s your size,” Laurent said and grabbed several pieces of clothing. He closed the drawer and walked back to Damen without meeting his eyes. He pushed the clothing into Damen’s hands. “I’ll meet you downstairs in 15 minutes,” he said and walked out the door and into the hallway.

Damen looked down and saw Laurent had given him three swimming trunks. Damen stepped out to the hallway and as he was closing Auguste’s bedroom door he heard the click of Laurent’s door closing at the end of the hall.

He walked to his bedroom and looked at the swimming trunks. He decided to go with the all black Quicksilver ones. He decided on a quick shower first and then changed and exited. Laurent was at the top of the stairs. Damen stared.

Laurent was also in black swimming trunks, sunglasses pushed up into his hair. “I have towels and sunscreen,” he said. Damen nodded. He followed him down the stairs and wished he could look anywhere else but at him but he couldn’t. Damen mostly dated women but he had had a couple of relationships with some boys as well, so it wasn’t strange that he found Laurent attractive, but he was slightly surprised about how nervous Laurent made him all the time. Damen had never found another man _this_ attractive. Come to think of it, Damen didn’t think he had ever found another female as attractive as he found Laurent. It was a strange realization.

Damen didn’t know what to make of this. With Laurent’s icy persona though, Damen thought it would be best to ignore and forget all and any feelings of attraction that he felt. There was no way and no hope and it could get weird so, no. 

They reached the lounge chairs, Laurent opened up the large umbrella that shaded his chair and Damen did the same. He had slipped on the sunglasses. Black was a stark color against Laurent’s fair skin and golden hair. Now, with nothing but his swim trunks on, Damen saw that he was slender but strong and muscular. He was fit in a perfect way. Muscles defined and hard, he had perfect abs, his arms slender but strong. Perfect biceps. Damen loved how his veins were pronounced under his delicate skin. He looked down at his gracefully fit legs. His long slender feet were in black flip flops. Damen was barefoot.

“I know we’re in the shade but I burn super quick,” Laurent said. His face was turned in Damen’s general direction but with his sunglasses on, it was hard to tell if he was actually looking at Damen or not. “Mind helping me with this?” Laurent held up the sunscreen.

“Sure,” Damen said, stepping to him.

“It’s a spray,” Laurent said. “Just hold it a few inches away and spray. You don’t have to rub or -“ 

“Laurent, I know how to use a sunscreen spray bottle, thanks,” Damen said. Laurent huffed a bit which made Damen smile. He smiled because Laurent had his back to him. Laurent reached back and pulled his hair up into a messy bun. It looked ridiculously good like that, Damen thought. He spread his arms out and Damen sprayed his shoulders and back and his arms.

Laurent took the bottle back, their fingertips grazing. Damen’s eyes flew to Laurent’s face but he showed no emotion if having even felt their fingertips touch. Yup, because it means nothing to him, Damen told himself. Laurent sprayed the front of his body. Once he was done he looked up at Damen.

“Turn around, I’ll get your back,” Laurent said nonchalantly. Damen turned and spread his arms as Laurent had. He felt a warm summer breeze hit his skin. It felt good. “Done,” Laurent said. Damen turned around and he took the bottle from Laurent, their fingertips grazed again. Damen sprayed his front and tossed the bottle on top of their towels. They laid back on their lounges.

Damen had forgotten to get his book, but it was fine. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “You took no time with Eloise,” Laurent said. Damen looked his way. He was leaning his head back and it seemed as if he had his eyes closed. His neck was beautiful. “Are you willing to just be intimate with anyone?” 

Damen wasn’t sure what to say. Laurent was speaking of something so private in such a clinical way. Like a doctor asking him if he needed an STD test. It wasn’t as if Laurent was asking for raunchy details or anything. Damen thought a moment. “I don’t purposely go out looking for it actually,” Damen answered. 

“Hmm,” Laurent said, in a disapproving way.

Damen rolled his eyes. He almost felt as if he was getting scolded. “Several things have to factor,” Damen explained. “First off, I would never approach a male or female asking for sex,” Damen said. Laurent turned rather quickly and looked at Damen as if caught by surprised. Damen narrowed his eyes at him. “You got something against me being bi?” He asked.

“No,” Laurent said. The answer was without his usual aloof tone. It sounded real.

Damen nodded. “Second, if I’m single, if I find them attractive and Eloise is a very pretty girl, you can’t deny that. Her breast are... amazing,” Damen said with a chuckle. He glanced at Laurent who was looking at him with a look that indicated he didn’t find Eloise’s breast amazing at all. Damen sighed. “If they have protection, if they’re not drunk and if they are old enough, because sometimes they look older than they are, so, with guys is easy, the voice can give it away sometimes but with females it can be tricky. Anyway, I figured Eloise had to be of age since she’s working here.” 

“You’re not though, you’re 17, does she know she committed statutory rape?” Laurent asked. “She could be fired for that.”

“Laurent, come on!” Damen said, suddenly feeling panic. “No, Laurent. She didn’t make me. And no I didn’t tell her I was 17, I just told her I was old enough. She did nothing wrong. Don’t fire her. I’m sure she needs this job and she’s a decent girl.”

“Decent? She fucks the foster kid my uncle has on his first day here. That’s decent?” Laurent sounded dangerously icy. 

“Laurent,” Damen said. “Please, don’t tell your uncle, look -“

“My uncle?” Laurent asked. He looked towards Damen. “I don’t have to tell my uncle. I told you, this is MY home. I could fire her if I pleased!”

Damen stared at him. How could someone so young be so cruel? “She didn’t make me. I’ll take all the blame. Kick me out if you want. She needs her job.”

Laurent stayed silent. “You’d give up living here for her? You don’t even know her!”

“I know no one is a maid because they’re happy being someone’s servant!” Damen said, maybe angrier than he meant. “And the home I was in before this one was wonderful. It was a tenth of the size but it was warm and loving and I was happy there. I’d go back today if it was up to me!”

Damen’s hands were shaking and his breathing was slightly labored. He felt a little queasy. He had never meant to get Eloise in trouble. This was horrible. He felt horrible. He glanced at Laurent. He could only see his profile. He wished he could punch him. What a waste, Damen thought. What a waste to have all that beauty, all that physical perfection on such a foul soul. Damen didn’t want to be around him anymore. He got up. He had to pass Laurent to go back inside. He started walking.

“Where are you going?” Laurent asked as Damen walked past him. Damen stopped. 

“I don’t feel like swimming anymore,” Damen said, trying to keep his tone as aloof as Laurent.

“Fucking relax. I won’t fire your girlfriend,” he said.

“She’s NOT my girlfriend,” Damen snapped looking back at him. 

Laurent lifted up his sunglasses. He narrowed his eyes at Damen. “So if she doesn’t mean shit what do you care what happens to her? She slept with a minor.”

Damen turned and walked to him. “She didn’t KNOW! She asked me how old I was and I said old enough. I can pass for 18, can’t I?” Dame said. He shook his head. “Look I won’t sleep with her again. I’ll tell her I’m 17. Just don’t fire her, please. She needs the job. No one works for fun!” 

“Ok fine,” Laurent said. Damen stood there a moment, wondering if Laurent meant it or not. Laurent got up and threw his sunglasses on the lounge and undid his bun, shaking his golden mane out. He took a couple of long strides and very gracefully dived into the pool. He even pointed his toes on the way in. He emerged way down and started doing laps. He dived down and did a summersault underwater, pushing off the side of the pool with his long legs.

Damen watched him a moment. After a couple of laps he swam to Damen, pushing his hair back. He looked as if he was shimmering, his pale skin wet and glistening in the sun. “You coming in? Or you still worried about your not girlfriend that you fucked but have promised to not fuck again?” Damen put his hands on his hips. “Fuck sakes! I won’t fire her!” Laurent said again. “Pinky swear!” Laurent rolled his eyes.

Damen wanted to swim and he thought he should just let this go before he pushed Laurent too far with it. “Move out the way!” Damen told Laurent. He swam away. Damen took a few steps back and then ran and cannon balled into the pool, flipping his whole body around once. He heard Laurent laugh as he went in. His feet touched the bottom of the pool and he pushed himself up. Once he surfaced he looked around and found Laurent. He was laughing. It was a genuine laugh. Damen grinned. Maybe these ten months wouldn’t be so bad after all.


	5. V

The next few days were better. Laurent and Damen were ok. Laurent wasn’t the most talkative person but Damen didn’t mind. Their silences felt comfortable. Damen joined Laurent in the music room every morning between lunch and breakfast and he decided to show Laurent he could play piano.

“My father paid for me to have lessons, but it’s been a few years,” Damen said.

“It’s like riding a bike,” Laurent said and got him some sheet music. It was difficult at first but after a few tries Damen was playing the song easily. Laurent played piano as well but he preferred the violin. 

“I play the guitar too,” Damen said.

“I don’t. We don’t have any guitars,” Laurent said.

“No biggie,” Damen said.

After lunch they swam sometimes but Damen also went to the gym. Laurent normally jogged on the treadmill while Damen did weight lifting. Laurent had also showed Damen some fencing moves. He had a dummy where he practiced. He had left his shoulder length hair down and he was in a sleeveless workout tank. Damen couldn’t deny how graceful and beautiful Laurent looked fencing. 

Damen imagine it to be a real sword, as a knight... or a prince or a king. Fighting in battle. Easily killing anyone who came in his way. He would be a fearsome warrior and a sight to behold. 

“I know nothing about the sport, but, just by looking at you... you’re so good at it,” Damen said. Laurent almost smiled.

* * *

It was three days before Auguste was scheduled to arrive for Labor Day and Damen and Laurent made their way down to dinner. They had showered after their afternoon workout. Laurent walked into the dining room first and froze for just a second. He then kept walking in. Damen walked in and saw a middle aged man seated at the head of the table.

They made their way to the table and Damen glanced at Laurent. He could see the tension in his jaw.

“Laurent,” the man said. He was in a dark blue suit and vest with a light blue button up shirt. His tie was just a lighter shade of blue than his suit. He had dark hair, with a stripe of gray in it. His eyes as blue as Laurent’s. He wasn’t as fair. His his beard was black, neat and trimmed.

“Uncle,” Laurent said in his icy tone.

“And you must be Damianos,” the older man said.

“He goes by Damen,” Laurent said offhandedly.

“Thank you, nephew,” Mr. De Vere said icily. He turned back to Damen. “Damen my apologies for being absent, I had business to take care of, but I was informed all was well with you.”

“Yes, Mr De Vere, sir. Thank you,” Damen said.

Dinner was a solemn affair that night. Laurent was icier than ever and didn’t look at Damen once. He gave his uncle short and somewhat curt replies. He was as rude as the first day Damen had met him. When the wine glasses were set, Laurent snapped at Eloise. “You know he doesn’t even drink the wine you idiot!” He said.

Eloise looked like she may cry. “Laurent, no need for that. Apologize please,” Mr. De Vere said. 

“Fuck this,” Laurent said and walked away. He even knocked his chair over. He had hardly eaten. Damen watched as Laurent’s golden hair flowed behind him and he exited the dining room.

Mr. De Vere sighed. “I’m so sorry, Eloise,” he said kindly.

“It’s alright sir,” she said quietly. “I’m sorry sir,” she said glancing at Damen. “He was right though, you don’t ever have the wine. It was my mistake.”

“It’s ok,” Damen said. “Please, just call me Damen. No need to sir me,” he said with a smile.

As promised, he had told her the day after his conversation with Laurent that he was seventeen. She had been frighten and had cried telling Damen she needed the job and Damen had felt like a tool. He told her not to worry, that Laurent wouldn’t say anything, but she was extra jumpy at meal times when Laurent was around. He hadn’t paid her any mind, until now. Damen felt horrible to have put her in this situating.

“Yes, sorry, Damen,” she said, wringing her hands.

“It’s alright, Eloise, really. You know my nephew and his temperament. Please, just collect his plates.” She quickly did it and left. Mr De Vere turned his attention to Damen. “I hope he has been treating you kindly.”

“Yeah,” Damen said. “He’s not the friendliest but he had been in a better mood till tonight.”

Mr. De Vere nodded. “That’s the reason I brought you into the picture,” he said. Damen looked at him. “Gordon told me you lost your father, like Laurent did. I thought maybe since you two had been through the same grief maybe he would open up to you. Confide in you. Become friendly. I would then ask you to help him by helping me. You could also keep an eye on him at school and let me know how he behaves in classes and such.”

“I’m a year older,” Damen said.

“Yes but Laurent is extreme smart. He’s in some AP classes. As are you,” Mr. De Vere said with a smile. “I saw your report cards, you are an incredibly smart young man,” he said.

Damen smiled. He always took pride in his school work. “Thank you, sir,” Damen said.

“Have you thought about what you want to study? You have so many opportunities, you’re so intelligent.”

Damen felt his stomach sink. “I can’t afford college sir,” he said quickly. 

“Nonsense, Damen, talk to a counselor when you start school. Get yourself set. Apply. I’ll pay for it.”

Damen sat stunned. He must have not heard correctly. His heart was pounding. He didn’t even know what to say, or if he could speak. “Uh,” he finally said. “I’m sorry, sir,” Damen said. “I don’t think I heard correctly.”

“You did,” Mr. De Vere said. “I said I would pay for your college. I will, Damen. As long as you apply yourself and keep your grades up. I will foot the bill. It’ll be my thank you, since you’re helping me with Laurent.”

Damen nodded. Of course. He was to be of some use to Mr. De Vere. “I’m not sure what you mean by helping,” Damen said.

“Keeping an eye on him, and who he hangs out with, simple things,” Mr. De Vere said. “But no worries, Damen, we’ll discuss that some other time. If you need anything let me know. Now, if you’ll excuse me,” he said.

He got up and patted Damen’s shoulder. He walked out of the dining room, leaving Damen alone.

* * *

Damen looked at his watch, 1:24 am. He couldn’t sleep. The conversation with Mr. De Vere was still replaying in his head. If Damen agreed to practically spy on Laurent he could have an all expenses paid ride to college. It seemed simple enough no? Caring uncle was worried about Laurent, whose crazy mood wings would make anyone question what was going on. But he was asking Damen, a complete stranger, to keep tabs on Laurent, and in return he would pay for Damen’s college. It all seemed so out of proportion.

Damen sighed. He threw his right forearm over his eyes. He should try to sleep. Everything was calm and quiet and Damen was drifting off. The sound was so faint, Damen almost missed it. 

“No.”

Damen sat up.

“No.”

He got up and pressed his ear against the wall he and Laurent shared.

“No. No.”

Damen’s heart skipped a beat. He quickly and silently walked out of his room and down the hall. His heart was pounding. Damen was strong and he could fight. Laurent’s door was closed. Damen put his hand in the doorknob, and turned it gently. He pushed the door open slightly. 

“No. No.”

Damen walked in. The moonlight shone brightly into Laurent’s room. He could make out the furniture and Laurent’s canopy bed. This surprised Damen a bit. He had never seen a real canopy bed in person, only in movies.

“No,” Laurent said softly. Breathlessly.

He must be having a nightmare, Damen thought. He disliked the way Laurent sounded. He sounded scared. He walked over. What would be the most soothing way to wake him, Damen wondered. He looked down at Laurent. He didn’t have a shirt on. The blankets were twisted round his waist. He looked so young. Innocent. His face, the expression was pained. Damien hated this. He didn’t want to see Laurent pained, even if it was a dream.

He sat beside him, at the edge of the bed. “Hey,” Damen said softly. He placed his hand on Laurent’s forearm. “Laurent? Hey,” Damen said again, gently squeezing his forearm.

Laurent woke suddenly. “No!” He said loudly and Damen saw a look of fear in his eyes.

“It’s me! It’s just me!” Damen said. “Are you -“

To Damen’s utter shock, Laurent, threw himself forward and embraced him. Damen froze. Their chest were touching. Laurent was panting. He was so warm, firm muscles under incredibly soft skin. The embrace only lasted a moment, Damen had been too shocked to embrace him back when suddenly, Laurent sat back and violently shoved Damen’s chest back, almost pushing him off the bed.

“What the FUCK are you doing in my room?!” Laurent said in a poisonous whisper. He was breathing hard.

Damen got up quickly. “I’m sorry, I heard you. You must have been having a nightmare,” he said hurriedly. 

Laurent froze. “You heard me?” Damen nodded. “What did I say?”

Damen looked at his face. Was he... scared? “You just kept saying no,” Damen said. “I’m sorry I was just -“

“Get the fuck out,” Laurent said. It was barely audible. Damen was still frozen with confussion. “I said get the fuck OUT!” Laurent said, saying the last word loudly.

Damen felt his face grow hot. He turned and started walking out.

“And don’t you dare tell anyone!” Laurent said. 

Damen looked back at him. He felt a sudden anger surge in him. He was sick of the way Laurent acted and talked to people. Sick of it. “Don’t flatter yourself, you spoiled brat!” Damen said angrily. “The world doesn’t fucking revolve around you! You’re not my preferred topic of conversation and next time I’ll let you piss your pants over your stupid nightmares instead of waking you from them! Sweet dreams!”

Damen would have given anything to have seen the look on Laurent’s face. He was sure no one had told him off before and it was high time someone did. He turned and walked out of his room. He was done with him, Damen thought. Laurent could go fuck himself.


	6. VI

The next couple of days Damen and Laurent had no interaction. Damen skipped breakfast and Laurent skipped lunch and Mr. De Vere was there for dinner and they didn’t even look at each other. If Mr. De Vere noticed he said nothing. The night before Auguste’s arrival, Mr. De Vere stopped Damen after dinner.

“Damianos, my nephew Auguste will arrive tomorrow. He’s going to be taking Laurent and you to the Hamptons,” he said. Damen nodded. “Although Auguste is extremely trustworthy, I’m going to ask you to keep a close eye Laurent.”

Damen breathed in and out. “Yeah, I don’t think I’m the right person to look out for Laurent. He hates me and -“

“My dear boy, he hates everyone. Including himself at times,” Mr. De Vere said. “Sometimes I worry about his self damaging behavior. I am at a loss about it. He wants for nothing, obviously. He’s extremely smart and talented both physically and artistically.” He sighed. 

Damen nodded, and even thought he hated Laurent’s spoiled brat attitude he felt for Mr. De Vere. “I’ll try to help him however I can,” Damen found himself saying.

Later that night as Damen laid in bed wondering what the weekend would bring he heard Laurent again. “No,” he would say. Damen clenched his fists. He looked at his watch. If it kept going more than a few minutes he would get up and wake him. He would just leave his room before he said anything to him. But Laurent seemed to have woken up. He heard him exit his bedroom and go to the bathroom. Damen shook his head and his thoughts turned again to running away. Miss Daisy wouldn’t turn him away. Being in the De Vere household was truly beginning to feel like it was more trouble than it was worth.

* * *

The next day, Damen skipped breakfast again and was surprised to see Laurent at lunch. They ate mostly in silence and Damen noticed how Eloise still acted very nervous around Laurent. Laurent, didn’t seem to notice or care or both. 

“My brother will be here in a few hours. Tomorrow we’re driving to the Hamptons,” Laurent said.

“Yeah, your uncle told me,” Damen said.

“And what else did he say? I’m sure he asked you to keep an eye on me,” Laurent said, a hard look in his eye.

“He did,” Damen said calmly. These couple of days with no contact had let Damen calm his mind and he felt more in control right now in front of Laurent.

Laurent seemed surprised by his admission. “What did you say?” He asked Damen nonchalantly.

Damen, in turn, felt surprised that Laurent was asking him what he had said instead of assuming. “I told him I was the wrong person to ask since you hated me.”

Laurent only raised a perfect eyebrow and shrugged. He didn’t say anything and actually seemed pleased at the fact that Damen felt that he hated him. Spoiled brat, Damen thought.

* * *

Auguste arrived right before dinner. Damen heard the commotion. He went downstairs, curious. Laurent had said Auguste and Damen were about the same size and he was right. Physically they were almost the same, Damen slightly more muscular though. He had the same blond hair and blue eyes, as his brother, but his were kind. His hair was short, in a nice fade out haircut and left slightly long on top, his hair swept to the left.

Laurent was beside himself with joy. He was talking more than Damen had ever heard him talk. It made Damen smile seeing him like this. Laurent was smiling and excited. He saw Damen at the bottom of the stairs. “Come meet my brother,” he said. He turned to Auguste. “That’s Damianos,” he said.

Damen stepped forward and stuck his hand out. Auguste took it. “Wonderful to meet you, Damianos,” Auguste said.

“Please, you can call me Damen.” Damen said and smiled at him.

Soon enough, Auguste’s luggage was taken upstairs and they went into the dining room where four places had been set. Laurent was still talking. Auguste had put his arm around his shoulder as they walked into the dining room. In a moment of brotherly love, Laurent leaned his head on Auguste’s chest and Auguste hugged his little bother. The sight warmed Damen’s heart and he smiled at it. Without meaning to, Damen remembered several nights ago when Laurent had embraced him. He had wished he had wrapped his arms around him instead of being frozen in shock. Damen shook his head and banished the thought he was having.

Mr. De Vere appeared soon enough. Damen noticed the stiffening in Laurent. It was obvious he disliked his uncle. Damen wondered what had happened there. Auguste hugged his uncle warmly. Mr. De Vere looked happy to see his older nephew as well. They all sat for dinner. As always, Mr. De Vere was at the head of the table, Auguste now across from Damen. Laurent was beside his older brother. Mr. De Vere questioned Auguste about school.

Auguste was set to start Harvard Law School that year. He turned to Laurent. “You know I wanted to come home and spend the summer with you, but that internship fell on my lap and it was too good to pass up.”

“I know,” Laurent said nodding.

Damen said nothing and just listened to Auguste talk. He was charming and charismatic. He would make a wonderful lawyer, Damen thought, he would have a jury eating out of the palm of his hand. Damen also enjoyed Laurent’s more pleasant manner. He and Auguste laughed and joked. This was a side of Laurent Damen truly enjoyed seeing.

Dessert was served and they stayed at the table and talked for a while. Auguste asked Damen several questions about himself and Damen spoke of his life prior to his father’s death and after.

“He’s incredibly smart,” Mr. De Vere told Auguste. “He’s maintained a 4.0 through out high school and he’ll be in all AP classes this year.”

Auguste smiled warmly at Damen. “Your father would be so proud, Damen, good for you.”

Damen nodded and smiled. The words hit him hard. No one had said that to him. Even though Auguste had never met his father, it felt good to hear it. “Thank you,” Damen said quietly looking down at his pie.

“Indeed, I told Damen if he applied himself I would be more than happy to pay for his college tuition,” Mr. De Vere said with a smile at Damon and a quick squeeze to his shoulder.

Damen’s eyes quickly went to Laurent who seemed to pale at the sound of this. He looked at Damen, his brow furrowed, he looked displeased. He looked away quickly. “Wow, Damen, what will you study then?” Auguste asked.

“I have no idea, I’ve never given a thought to it since I never thought I’d have a chance to go,” Damen said truthfully. He glanced at Laurent again who had a scowl on his face. Damen wondered why the thought of his uncle helping Damen out bothered him so much. Did he hate Damen that much? He didn’t want to think about it.

Eventually Mr. De Vere bid them all a good night. Damen, Auguste and Laurent stayed a while longer chatting. Damen saw the Laurent had began to relax again. They finally slowly started making their way upstairs to their rooms.

“Alright you two,” Auguste said. “Tomorrow, we ride. Go and pack before bed. We’ll leave after breakfast. We’re picking up Ada. Then off to the Hamptons we go. We should be there in time for a late lunch. 2 nights and 2 days. Ada’s dad is going to let us use his yacht. We’ll have a great time.”

“I let Damen borrow some of your swimming trunks,” Laurent said.

“That’s fine. Damen, you borrow anything you need, no problem,” Auguste said.

“Thank you,” Damen replied.

“Alright, good night, little brother,” Auguste said wrapping his arm around Laurent again. Laurent smiled and placed his head in Auguste’s shoulder. Damen thought if he placed his arm around Laurent like that, Laurent’s head would perfectly sit on his shoulder as well. “Good night, Damen,” he said, bringing Damen out of his thoughts and shaking his hand, he went into his room. Laurent and Damen glanced at each other.

Without a word Damen turned and walked to his bedroom and opened up his door. To his surprise, Laurent walked in right after him, closing the door behind him. He walked into Damen’s room and paced around like a caged lion. His hands were in fists. He looked at Damen, who was just gazing at Laurent, not reacting to the situation. “So what did you do for my uncle in exchange for your college tuition?”

Damen furrowed his brow, he didn’t like Laurent’s tone. He wasn’t quite sure what Laurent was insinuating. “Nothing. And he hasn’t given it to me. And if he doesn’t it will be just as well,” Damen said.

Laurent paced back and forth a few more times. He then just walked out of Damen’s room without saying anything else. Damen shook his head. He disliked the fact that Laurent had left. He wanted to talk to him again, spend more time with him. It was a reckless feeling, Damen knew it.

He thought about Auguste saying they should pack for tomorrow. Damen had a large duffle bag and his backpack. He walked out of his room to Laurent’s room and knocked on the door. Laurent answered and looked surprised to see Damen.

“I have a large duffle bag and my backpack. They’re not quite the size bag I need for the weekend,” Damen said. Laurent gave him a look and walked back into his room. Damen followed him.

“Well, I had this bag I was packing but it’s probably too big. If you want you can put your stuff in here,” Laurent said. Damen nodded. “I’m almost done,” he said. Damen watched as Laurent gathered some more clothing and folded it gracefully with his long, slender fingers and put it in his bag.

“What did you think I had done for your uncle, Laurent?” Damen asked. He was still confused by the nature of Laurent’s question. He didn’t want to believe he meant... no.

Laurent paused a moment but just kept packing. “Ok, I’m done, come on,” he said zipping up the bag and walked past Damen.

Damen followed Laurent to his bedroom. Laurent placed the bag on Damen’s bed and then climbed on the bed, clasping his hands behind his head and leaning back against the headboard. Damen noticed Laurent was barefoot. “You gonna answer me?” Damen asked. 

“Well, you were so quick to fuck Eloise, I wonder -“

“Laurent! What the fuck!” Damen said looking at him in shock and anger.

“Oh, my bad,” Laurent said quietly in an aloof tone. If he was embarrassed by what he had said he didn’t show it. Because he wasn’t, Damen thought. 

Damen felt the heat on his neck and face and he angrily put things in the bag. He couldn’t believe Laurent was insinuating it. It made Damen sick to his stomach. He even felt slight embarrassment in the fact that Laurent would think him capable of that. Damen didn’t want to look at Laurent. In fact, he wished Laurent would just leave now. He was stupid for having felt the slightest sliver of... whatever it was that he had felt that had led him to Laurent’s door moments ago. After a while, Damen finally glanced over at him. He was leaning back on the headboard still, his eyes closed, peaceful look on his face. He looked dangerously handsome. Damen shook his head. He was done packing. “Ok, I’m done,” he said.

“Ok, we can leave it here,” Laurent said. He gracefully swung his legs over the side of Damen’s bed and started walking out the door. He turned his head back, long hair sweeping over his shoulder. He looked at Damen and Damen looked back. For a moment, it seemed as if Laurent was deciding if he should say whatever it was he was thinking of saying. 

“Sweet dreams, Damianos,” Laurent finally said with a slight upturn of the corner of his lips. He’s amused at my discomfort, Damen thought. He narrowed his eyes at Laurent. “And I do apologize if I offended you.”

Damen said nothing and watched as Laurent exited his room. The bedroom door closed quietly behind him. “Fucking spoiled brat,” Damen said and would have given anything to punch that perfect face.


	7. VII

The following day, breakfast was a bit of a noisy affair. Auguste had mentioned having to pick up Ada, who was his girlfriend, but she ended up showing up at their home. Ada was a bit shorter than Laurent and had light brown hair. She had large hazel eyes and freckles across her nose. Her face had a pretty roundness to it that made her look much younger than her 20 years of age. She was studying Chemistry and Chemical Biology at Harvard.

Laurent seemed very friendly towards Ada as well and she hugged Laurent and gave him a peck on the cheek. She hugged Damen when they were introduced and he was surprised at how strong she felt compared to how thin she looked.

“I wish I had a younger sister to introduce you to!” She said. “You’re so handsome!” Damen just smiled and felt his cheeks warm slightly. She found this endearing, apparently, and hugged him again

Damen caught sight of Laurent’s face who looked annoyed. Of course Laurent would hate anyone paying Damen a compliment.

Ada was bubbly and sweet. They all had a huge breakfast. Mr. De Vere only made an appearance when they were about to leave to bid them all a safe trip. “Please, Auguste, text me when you’ve arrived,” he told him.

“Yes, Uncle, see you Sunday night,” Auguste said.

Ada had come in a large black SUV which she told Auguste to drive. They packed their bags in the back of it and Laurent and Damen climbed into the backseat. The SUV was large and there was enough space in the backseat that Damen and Laurent could have fit another person between them. Auguste took off and said the drive would be a couple of hours.

Laurent relaxed and lifted his knee onto the seat, lounging into a comfortable position. Damen had brought his headphones and put them around his neck. “What are you listening to?” Laurent asked.

Damen glanced at him. “Panic! At The Disco,” he answered.

“High Hopes?” Laurent asked with a bit of a smile. Damen nodded. “You like Fall Out Boy?” He asked. Damen nodded again. Laurent seemed to be in a good mood. Damen hoped it would last the weekend. He really wanted to get to know Laurent this way, happy and relaxed.

“I like Bastille too,” Damen said. “And The Script.”

Laurent was smiling. “And Imagine Dragons and One Republic,” he said. 

Damen grinned as he glanced out the window. He felt... happy. He looked back at Laurent and caught Laurent looking at him. He gave him an easy smile and then looked away. Damen kept his eyes on him. Laurent was in khakis and a bright blue button up shirt. He had his long mane tucked behind his ears, parted to one side. He had a navy blue knit sweater thrown over his shoulders. He looked like a model, Damen thought.

Damen was in jeans and a tee shirt. He didn’t want to ever think much about what to put on. The drive was smooth and since Auguste and Ada were talking to themselves it left Damen and Laurent to converse amongst themselves as well.

“Have you ever been to the Hamptons?” Laurent asked in his bored voice. He spoke with the same tone earlier when he was asking Ada about school. Damen had wondered if he used this tone when he wanted to know something but didn’t want to show his interest.

“No,” Damen said. “This will be my first time.”

They rode on and Damen and Laurent made small talk. It was pleasant and Damen could tell Laurent was relaxed. The ride felt like it was much quicker than a couple of hours. 

“Alright, we’re gonna have lunch,” Auguste said, loud enough that Damen and Laurent knew he was addressing them as well. “Anywhere in particular you guys wanna go?”

Damen, having never been there glanced at Laurent. “Can we go to Cowfish?” Laurent asked.

“Yes we can, little brother,” Auguste said with a smile. 

They drove a bit further and parked finally. They got out and Damen looked around. It was a very pretty place. They walked up the long concrete path and walked up the stairs to the restaurant and went inside. “We should sit outside,” Laurent said. Auguste agreed.

They did just that. They were led outside to a table for four. Ada and Auguste sat beside each other and so Laurent and Damen had to sit beside each other as well. Laurent stood to the side and let Damen sit first, he was against the railing of the balcony. Damen had a perfect view of the sparkling water and sailboats around.

Laurent glanced his way. “Have you ever sailed?” He asked him quietly. Damen shook his head.

“We’ll go sailing tomorrow. There’s a family who we’re friendly with that’s having a party tonight and they have a son your age, Damen. He’s at your school as well,” Auguste said.

“Who?” Laurent asked.

“Nikandros,” Auguste said. Laurent rolled his eyes. Auguste chuckled. “You don’t have to talk to Nik, you can ride the jet skis,” Auguste told Laurent. He turned back to Damen. “He’s a great guy. I think you too will get along. He’s in the wrestling team in school, he may want to convince you to join,” Auguste said.

Damen perked up. “I’ve wrestled all through high school,” Damen said with a huge smile.

“Perfect, you two can be bffs then,” Laurent said.

Ada giggled, not seeming to take Laurent’s comment as anything but a joke. “Laurent, you have your fencing, you and Damen can support each other during each other’s tournaments,” Auguste said kindly.

Damen wondered how Auguste and Laurent had turned out so different. Maybe it was since Laurent had been orphaned so young, Damen thought. Now being 16 and 21, the difference between them was as obvious as night and day. Having never met Laurent before now, Damen didn’t know how he was before, but who is the same from the time they’re 10 to the time they’re 16?

Lunch was delicious and Auguste said they should pass by a grocery store. “Why? Aren’t we staying at the Baker House?” Laurent asked.

“No, we’re staying at a small place my family owns,” Ada said. “They’ve had it forever. It’s small but cozy.”

Auguste looked at Damen and Laurent. “So, hope you two don’t have any issues sharing a room,” he said.

“I don’t care,” Laurent said as they climbed back in the car.

“Fine with me,” Damen told Auguste.

“Good,” he said smiling at both of them. 

* * *

They passed by a grocery store and Damen couldn’t help but smile at the items Laurent had picked out. He had a bottle of wine, some grape soda, some expensive cheese as well as red licorice and some gummy bears. Damen had some yogurt and fruits as well as carrots and broccoli and some ranch dressing. He had also grabbed some strawberry lemonade.

Auguste and Ada had picked out staples and once they had paid they got back in the car. Damen and Laurent were quiet on the short ride to the small cottage Ada’s family owned. Once Damen saw it, he realized it wasn’t small. It was still almost twice as big as Miss Daisy’s two bedroom ranch. The bedrooms in this place were upstairs. They got everything out of the car and Ada started putting the groceries away.

“Your bedroom is at the top of the stairs to the left. The bathroom is the door adjacent,” she told them and Damen picked up their duffle bag and started making his way to the stairs. The ‘cottage’ had beautiful distressed wooded floors and white walls. There were knick knacks in varied shades of blue in a nautical theme. There were anchors and seashells and various other decorations that fit it perfectly strewn around. The whole downstairs was open and bright sunlight shone in. Damen saw a deck outside the sliding glass doors off the kitchen and past the deck, the ocean. He walked to the spiral stair case and started making his way up and turned left.

He walked into the bedroom and saw it had two twin beds. It had the same distressed wooden floors. There were large windows and Damen dropped the bag and walked to the windows, looking out. He had been to the ocean just not here. He remembered the last time had been for his 13th birthday. His father had said he couldn’t believe he was the father to a teenager now. Damen smiled at the memory. He took a deep breath in and out.

“Must be a good memory,” Laurent said. Damen was caught by surprise but didn’t show it.

“It was,” he said softly.

He became aware of Laurent coming to stand beside him. “Is it about your countless conquests? It obviously takes you no time to get comfortable. I’m sure there will be more than one willing participant at the gathering we’ll be going to later today,” Laurent said. “And you have two days to do as you please.”

Damen felt his annoyance surge. He waited a moment so he could keep his voice steady. “Actually I was remembering the last time I came to the ocean,” he said. “My father took me the last birthday of mine we spent together.”

Damen turned from the window and sat at one of the beds. He looked at Laurent, who didn’t seem the least bit affected by Damen’s words.

“Why are you so interested in who I fuck anyway?” Damen asked.

Laurent blushed. Damen was surprised by that. “I’m not,” Laurent answered, sounding annoyed. Damen was surprised by the emotion he heard. He was so used to him talking without any emotion. Maybe he was finally getting through to him somehow, Damen thought. 

“I understand your dislike over the whole Eloise situation,” Damen said. “But the insinuation of me having sex with your uncle was downright _disturbing_ not to mention insulting,” Damen continued.

“Oh is he too old for you? You like them young is that it?” Laurent asked in his poisonous voice.

“What? NO!” Damen said. He stared at Laurent. “That’s disgusting, Laurent! I saw enough kids in foster care that were abused and the damage it caused them, don’t say anything like that to me EVER AGAIN!” Damen said angrily.

Laurent tilted his head and studied him. That wasn’t the reaction Damen expected but he didn’t care. There was no getting through Laurent’s iron walls that he put up. Damen shook his head kicked off his sneakers and laid back on his bed. He let out a long breath. “I apologize,” Laurent said quietly and walked out of the room.

Damen covered his face with his hands. He should run away for real. Maybe he should do it when they returned Sunday. He didn’t think he could endure 10 months of Laurent’s insults and jabs and insinuations. He put his hands down and looked up at the white ceiling. Damen also knew, as much as he hated to admit it, that not being able to get past those walls that Laurent put up would be just as hard if not harder to endure for 10 more months. Damen closed his eyes. He wished he had never met Laurent De Vere.


	8. VIII

Damen had stayed laying in bed. He wasn’t sure how long it had been but Laurent came back up and glanced at Damen.

“Auguste said we should change and go,” he said. Damen nodded. “Nikandros’ family has a large ocean front property. They have several jet skis so I plan to ride one,” he said. Damen lifted on to his elbows. Laurent had started to unbutton his shirt. Damen watched as he slid it off. “They have a swimming pool too, not sure if you’re planning to just go socialize,” Laurent said. Damen watched as Laurent undid his pants. Damen should have looked away... but just couldn’t. Laurent turned his back to him and slid his pants and boxers down. 

He stood there, fully undressed in front of Damen as if he had no shame. But why should he? Thought Damen. His body was perfection. It was long and lean and perfectly proportioned. Although he was shorter than Damen that didn’t mean he was short by any means. His skin smooth and unblemished. “Maybe you’re just gonna go and see who you can fuck,” Laurent said, turning to look at Damen over his shoulder. He grabbed some swimming trunks from their bag and slipped them on. They were navy blue.

“But anyway, if you plan to swim, put on some swimming trunks,” he said.

“I don’t want to go swim and I won’t be looking to fuck anyone there,” Damen said looking into his eyes. He wondered if Laurent was actually jealous of this. No, the thought was silly, Damen pushed it away.

“You and Nikandros might hit it off. You two have the same vibe,” Laurent said as he fastened his swimming trunks and sat down at the edge of his bed.

“Vibe?” Damen asked with a slight smile. He sat up on his bed looking across at Laurent. “What vibe is that?”

Laurent sighed. “You know, obnoxious _bro_ vibes,” he said. Damen laughed. Laurent smiled and looked down at his hands. He lifted up his right leg, his heel on the edge of the mattress. He rested his chin on his knee. “Nikandros isn’t that bad. He’s annoyingly nice and friendly to everyone.”

The opposite of you, Damen thought. “You like him?” Damen asked. He wasn’t sure why he was asking and he wasn’t sure what kind of like he meant but he wanted to know.

Laurent shrugged. “I’m indifferent about him. I wouldn’t say yes if he asked me out,” he said.

Damen looked in Laurent’s eyes. He nodded. “How about if a girl asked you out?” Damen asked.

“They try but the answer will always be no,” Laurent said. And just like that, Damen now knew Laurent preferred males and he was happy that he did. But he pushed the happiness away. This news meant nothing. It should mean absolutely nothing.

* * *

Laurent had put on some flip flops, a red tank top that hung off his body perfectly and had tied his hair up. Damen had changed into a tank top as well, his was navy blue with the outlines of palm trees at the bottom. He had khaki shorts on. He had his flip flops on as well. They took the short drive to Nikandros’ home. This was another opulent home. Damen really didn’t know why these people needed so many rooms.

From the moment they walked in, Damen saw how everyone gravitated towards the De Vere brothers. The high school crowd groveling at Laurent’s feet and the college crowd came to talk to Auguste. He had a relaxed arm around Ada’s neck. Laurent glanced back and Damen suddenly noticed he was waiting for him to catch up. “The jet skis are outside. Wanna come?” he asked. He waited before looking at Damen. When their eyes met, Damen nodded.

“Laurent! Hey!” A girl’s voice broke out of the crowd and she came towards them.

Laurent stiffen slightly. Damen noticed and was pretty sure no one else did. “Hey,” he called out, sounding bored and started walking outside, ignoring the girl that was approaching. Damen followed. Once outside, some more people greeted Laurent, he pointed. There was a small pier and there were several jet skis. They started walking to it.

“There you are!” A pleasant voice called out to them. They tuned and Damen saw a tall, broad brown haired young man coming to then.

“Nikandros,” Laurent said. Damen watched as they exchanged a fist pump. “This is Damianos,” Laurent said.

“Damen,” Damen told him. “Nice to meet you,” he said.

“Likewise, Nik,” he said with a friendly smile. “Laurent go ride a jet ski, have fun,” Nikandros said. Laurent didn’t need to be told twice. Damen and Nikandros walked up the pier.

“So you’ll be coming to Collins Prep next week,” Nik said.

Damen nodded. “I’m gonna stick out like a sore thumb.”

“Nonsense we all wear uniforms, no one sticks out,” he said. It sounded as he really believed it, Damen thought. But Damen had been to enough schools to know there were cliques and groups and you had to find your place or a bully will and bullies came in every shape, size and economic circumstance.

“Are you into sports?” Nik asked. Damen watched as Laurent strapped a life vest on and climbed onto a jet ski.

“I wrestle,” Damen said.

“What? That is awesome! So do I!” Nik said sounding extremely excited. Damen couldn’t help but smile. They stood there and talked. Nikandros was treating Damen as if he was already on the wrestling team, talking of other high schools they faced and the best strategies for beating their best wrestlers.

“You and I are obviously same weight class,” he said chuckling and Damen grinned and knew he was right. “We’ll be awesome, bro,” he said. He suddenly remembered Laurent’s comment. Bro vibe. Damen smiled

Instinctively Damen looked out at the ocean, searching for the blond head with a messy bun on top. He found it. There were other people riding jet skis. Damen watched him. He had smiled out at the ocean and had laughed at a silly comment Nik had made. He liked Nik. Laurent had been right, they had the same vibe. Somehow, in talking to Nik it felt like he was talking to someone he had known for a long time. Damen glanced back at Nik as they laughed. Nik gave him a playful bump on the shoulder and then Damen returned his gaze back to the blond that seemed to be keeping his attention. 

It happened as if in slow motion. Laurent had turned left and was turning again to go back the way he came. It was two girls on one jet ski and Damen saw the moment they lost control. It probably would have been nothing if Laurent hadn’t been standing up. Of it they had hit him from behind or the side or heck, head on. But Laurent was in the midst of turning and they hit him at a horrible angle and as Damen saw it, he was already kicking off his flip flops, pulling his phone and wallet out of his shorts and pulling off his shirt. Laurent’s jet ski was hit out from under him and he was thrown forward, his head hitting the front of the jet ski that hit him with a thud Damen heard as he ran and jumped into the ocean. 

Damen was a good and strong swimmer. He didn’t have to worry about being hit by a jet ski as everyone had stopped. The two girls were screaming. Damen reached Laurent in no time and brought him back to the shore. The moment his feet could touch the bottom of the ocean, he walked, holding Laurent in his arms. He was unconscious. Damen’s heart was pounding. By the time he made it out of the water, Auguste and Ada had rushed outside as had Nik’s dad, who, luckily, was a doctor. Damen stared at him. He didn’t even know there were any adults in the home, all he had seen was rowdy teens and college kids.

Damen watched him intently as he checked Laurent over and lifted his eyes. “Looks like a nasty blow to the head. If he doesn’t wake up -“

Laurent woke up, coughing. He tried to sit up and it wasn’t until then that Damen realized he had been holding his hand. He would have let go but Laurent gripped it as he coughed. He was turned to his side. His life vest was taken off by Damen at the doctor’s request. Damen held his hand again.

“Laurent, hey,” Nik’s dad said. “How are you buddy? What hurts?” He was looking into Laurent’s eyes.

“My head,” he said in a rough voice and turned to his right and looked right at Damen. It was then that Damen saw the bruise, now forming, up above his left eye brow.

“He needs ice,” Damen said.

“Can you sit up?” Laurent was asked and he did slowly. Damen then helped him stand. He wobbly made his way to the kitchen, Laurent shut his eyes as the bright light hit them. Damen sat him gently on a kitchen stool and someone handed him ice which he held to Laurent’s eyebrow. He leaned in close. Damen had to fight the need to put his arm around him and comfort him. He was close enough to hear him breathing. 

He heard the soft groan of pain. “Get me out of here,” Laurent whispered the words so softly, Damen was sure no one else could hear but him. Damen looked up and saw Auguste talking to Nik’s dad. He caught Ada’s eye and Damen motioned her over.

Once she reached them Damen gave her a smile. “I think Laurent should go home,” he said. She nodded and walked back to Auguste. He joined them.

“Ok, let’s go,” Auguste said.

“No, no you and Ada stay. You guys have fun. It’s just a bump to the head. I’ll be fine,” Laurent said.

“Plus, I’ll be with him,” Damen added.

Auguste thought about it for a moment. “You sure?” He asked Damen.

“Yes and in case of anything I can text you. We’re 5 houses down,” Damen said. Auguste handed Damen the car and home keys and Nik appeared with his shirt, phone, wallet and his and Laurent’s flip flops. Damen thanked him.

“I put my number in there, bro,” Nikandros said. Damen grinned and thanked him again.

Damen helped Laurent up and they made their way through the house, Auguste escorting them. They walked out side and Damen helped Laurent into the passenger seat. “Engage him in conversation and watch how he walks. If he’s becoming dazed or isn’t walking properly text me. It could be signs of a concussion.” Damen nodded. “Give him 600 mg of ibuprofen when you get home. He’ll have a massive headache. Watch him after he takes it or after any food since he may be dizzy or the bump may cause vertigo and he may throw up.” Auguste looked into Damen’s eyes. “Are you sure you’re ok with this?”

“Yes,” Damen said and he knew Auguste saw the determination in his eyes.

Auguste searched Damen’s face then smiled at him. “Thank you,” Auguste said, placing his hands on Damen’s shoulders. 

“No problem,” Damen said, smiling back. Damen wanted to do this.

“I’m sure Nik will drive Ada and I home later, and Ada has her set of keys so don’t worry bout staying up,” Auguste told him, with a playful punch to the shoulder.

“Ok, see you later,” Damen said and walked around the SUV and climbed in. He put his tank top on the seat since his shorts were still slightly damp.

“We weren’t even an hour,” Laurent said pointing to the clock on the dashboard. It was just past 5 in the afternoon.

“Well, least you rode your jet ski,” Damen said. 

Laurent let out a chuckle. Damen smiled as he cranked the car and started backing out slowly. “You didn’t even have time to see if there was anybody -“

“There wasn’t,” Damen said. Laurent and him locked gazes for a second or two and then Damen turned on to the the street and made the short ride to their place.


	9. IX

Damen parked and then went to help Laurent out, who actually made it out on his own. Damen shut the door and locked the car. Laurent reached for him. It shouldn’t have made Damen feel the way it did, but that was something he couldn’t help. He just tried to ignored it. He wrapped his arm around Laurent’s shoulders, and instead of helping him forward, Damen pulled him in as if to embrace him.

To his surprise Laurent _let him_. Damen pulled him close and Laurent’s forehead pressed on Damen’s left shoulder.

“What are you doing?” Laurent said in his iciest tone yet. Damen let go and stepped back quickly.

“I’m... I’m sorry,” Damen said. “I’m sorry, I’m just glad you’re alright.”

“You can go back to the party, I’ll be fine,” Laurent said and turned to walk inside the house but turned too quickly and almost lost his balance.

“Don’t be ridiculous, you need help,” Damen said, grabbing a hold of his arm but letting go the second Laurent was steady on his feet.

“Oh, you wanna hold my dick while I piss?” Laurent asked. Damen felt his face grow hot but didn’t answer that. He let it slide, he shouldn’t have pulled Laurent in like he did. “How sweet of you. And me in a state like this where I can’t even defend myself properly,” Laurent continued.

“Shut the fuck up I would never force you or anyone,” Damen said and let out a ragged breath as he stayed a step behind Laurent as they made their way inside.

Laurent made his way to the kitchen counter and sat on a stool. He leaned forward. It was obvious he was in pain. He scrunched up his nose and exposed his teeth. He looked quite dangerous, Damen thought. 

“You can have 600 mg of ibuprofen,” Damen said. “I’ll go get it for you. Maybe have a banana or some crackers so that it doesn’t upset your stomach so much?”

“A banana,” Laurent said softly, as if his own voice was too loud for the head ache he had. Damen went and gathered the pills and got him a tall glass of water. He grabbed a banana and he noticed the look of surprise in Laurent when he saw Damen hand it to him already half peeled. “Thank you,” he said. He took the pills, drunk half the glass and ate half the banana.

Damen was about to say he was going to go change when he realized Laurent was also half damp. “My damp clothes are uncomfortable, I’m sure yours are too,” Damen said.

“They are,” Laurent said and looked towards the stairs as if gathering the courage to climb them. 

“I can get clothes for you, you can change in the bathroom down here,” Damen said.

“Thank you,” Laurent said again.

“Alright,” Damen replied and went upstairs. He took a very very quick shower and changed. He grabbed clothes for Laurent. Some very comfortable looking jeans with strings, a tank top and a black zip up. He got him boxers and socks as well. He then grabbed a bathrobe because he thought Laurent might want to wash the salt water away.

He jogged downstairs. Laurent was sitting at the same place. The banana and water were all gone. Damen was pleased about that.

“I showered, I wondered if you may want to as well?” He asked. Laurent nodded once and reached up and tried to pull the hair tie from his hair.

“Ah!” He said softly, in pain.

Damen took a breath in. “May I?” Damen asked. Laurent nodded once more. Damen walked forward and as gently as he could, untangled the mess of blond hair and took the hair tie out. It wasn’t too difficult.

“I...” Laurent said , turning in the kitchen stool to face Damen. He drifted off.

“What?” Damen asked.

“I still don’t feel too steady on my feet,” Laurent said. 

“I can help,” Damen said.

Laurent sat and dropped his head slightly. He was only 16, Damen thought to himself. His icy nature was that of a person much older than he was. “If I get in the tub it may be easier so I can sit,” he said softly.

“Yeah, I mean whatever you’re comfortable with,” Damen said. He meant it. “I brought you a bathrobe,” he said. Laurent nodded.

Damen’s phone chimed as a text came in. He took it out of his pocket and read. “Who is it?” Laurent asked, the icy edge to his voice was back.

“Ada saying she had aloe in the downstairs bathroom which should help with your bruising,” Damen told him.

They made their way to the bathroom. Laurent leaned against the wall as Damen went and ran the bathwater. “I like it more warm than lukewarm,” Laurent said. Damen nodded. Once the water was done, he stood up. 

Laurent carefully slipped off his tank top. Damen noticed the bruising on the left side, over his chest and down his side. He then reached for his swim trunks and started to undo them. Damen looked at the ground. “Relax, you’re not the first person to see me naked,” Laurent said off handedly. Damen was sure he wasn’t. He saw as his swim trunks dropped to the ground. Laurent took a second when he got the edge of the tub and Damen offered him his arm. He thought it would make him feel more comfortable if he was the one holding on. “Thank you,” Laurent said for third time that day. He kept his grasp on Damen’s forearm as he lowered himself down.

Laurent gathered up his knees and gingerly laid his head on them. Damen gave him a moment. “Does any thing else hurt?” He asked.

“My whole body feels as if I got thrown off a jet ski and landed head first on the jet ski that hit me,” he said plainly. Damen chuckled in spite of himself. Laurent looked up at him and actually smiled. It was brief but Damen caught it. “Who got me out of the water?” Laurent asked.

Damen recalled how Laurent had squeezed his hand as he had woken up. He didn’t know it was Damen. He had just squeezed his hand on reflex. “Me,” Damen said quietly.

“Great,” Laurent said. “Now I owe you,” he said.

“You don’t _owe_ me,” Damen said annoyed. He hated how Laurent said the word. He seriously hates me, Damen thought. “Your life vest would have kept you afloat anyway,” Damen said.

“Well, seeing as I remember being hit and then I remember waking on the beach I assume I was unconscious that time in between, and since I was thrown into the air I had a 50/50 chance of landing face down in the water,” Laurent said. “Swallowing sea water and having no oxygen from two to five minutes would have meant I would still be unconscious and in a hospital right now, so, yeah, I owe you one.” Laurent showed no emotion on his face. 

Damen sighed. “Want me to help you wash your hair? It smells of seaweed,” he said.

Laurent rolled his eyes but scooted closer to the side of the tub. He closed his eyes and Damen could tell he was still very much in pain. He felt for him. Damen didn’t enjoy to see anyone in pain. Damen had grabbed a plastic bowl from the kitchen and he decided to take his shirt off so he wouldn’t wet it. He scooped some warm water on Laurent’s hair and then grabbed some shampoo.

Damen very gently and carefully washed it and rinsed it out. He did this without thinking about who this was. Without thinking who this hair belonged to. He wouldn’t be doing himself any favors if he did. Why is he so cold? Wondered Damen. Why is he so cruel? What happened to you? He wondered. Auguste and Damen had suffered the same fate, lost their parents young, yet Laurent seemed to have an anger and a resentment that exceeded his sixteen years of age.

“Do you condition it?” Damen asked. 

“Yeah,” Laurent said. 

Damen gently spread some conditioner through his hair. “Wanna sit here a few minutes?” Damen asked. 

“Yes. Please. Come back in 10?” He asked.

“Sure,” Damen replied and exited the bathroom

* * *

Damen had come back in 10 minutes and had rinsed our Laurent’s hair. As Laurent had dried himself, sitting on the closed toilet seat, Damen had busied himself looking for the aloe. Laurent had slipped on his boxers and pants. Damen had helped him with his socks, he knew it hurt Laurent to bend over. Laurent applied the aloe to his chest and eyebrow and put his tank top on himself. Laurent brushed most of his hair. Damen had gently worked out the ends where Laurent’s left arm was too sore to reach. He then helped him with his sweater, Damen scooping his blond hair out from under the sweater.

They walked back to the living room. Despite being slow and obviously in pain, Laurent looked steadier in his feet. He sat gingerly at one end of the large navy blue sectional.

Damen’s phone rang from the kitchen. He went over and answered. It was Auguste. “How is he?” He asked.

“Better. He bathed and changed and now he’s on the couch. He seems steady on his feet,” Damen answered.

“Ok. Thank you so much, Damen,” Auguste said. “I’ve ordered you guys some pizza, wings and breadsticks. It should be there within the hour. The delivery guy has already been tipped. Call me if you need anything.”

“Will do, thanks,” Damen said and walked back to the living room. “Your brother ordered us pizza,” Damen told Laurent.

“Great,” he said without much feeling. Damen rolled his eyes and told himself Laurent had just been through a bad experience and to relax.

Laurent turned and laid on his right side, the bruise on his eye brow and the area above was now very pronounced and Damien felt in him how much he hated seeing it. Laurent looked up at him. “Guess it looks as horrible as I thought based on your expression,” he said.

“No, no,” Damen said without thinking. 

Laurent gave him a wry smiled and breathed through his nose. 

“Thank you, Damianos,” Laurent said. “For trying to spare my feelings when you owe me nothing at all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another visual aide:
> 
> [Laurent x Damen](https://starfromphoenix.tumblr.com/post/181277331547/my-modern-day-princes-laurent-x-damianos)


	10. X

The pizza had arrived and Damen had brought it to the kitchen. He saw Laurent get up slowly from the couch. “No, no stay I’ll bring it to you,” he said. 

“It’s ok,” Laurent said. 

Damen got him a plate and opened the boxes for him. “What do you wanna drink?” Damen asked him. 

“Orange juice,” Laurent replied softly. 

Damen got a glass and poured it. “If you want more just tell me,” he said. 

“Why are you being so nice to me?” Laurent asked. 

“Because you smacked your face into a jet ski,” Damen said. “I’ve never done it myself but I’m assuming it’s a painful experience.”

“Yeah, and you could have just enjoyed it,” Laurent said. “I’ve not been the nicest.”

“I would never take pleasure in any one’s pain,” Damen said looking into Laurent’s eyes with a slight look of distaste. “Especially when one is defenseless against it.”

They held each other’s gaze for a while. Laurent nodded. They ate in a comfortable silence.

* * *

After they ate Laurent made his way back to the living room. Damen cleaned the dishes up and then went to the living room as well.

“How about a movie?” Laurent asked him.

“Sure,” Damen said. Laurent handed him the remote. Laurent was seating in the middle of the couch, where the corner of the sectional was. Damen sat beside him, to his right, since that’s the part that was in front of the tv. Damen put Netflix on and started browsing. 

Laurent had leaned his face on the back of the couch and Damen was very aware of the proximity of Laurent’s face to his shoulder. They decided on a horror, Veronica, and sat and watched. They didn’t talk. About 45 minutes in Laurent made as if to get up and Damen asked what he needed. He said water and Damen got it for him. 

“Thank you,” Laurent said. 

They finished the film and Laurent said he was tired. Damen helped him upstairs and Laurent stripped to his tank and boxers and laid down. 

Damen went downstairs, turned off most of the lights and got Laurent the bottle of ibuprofen, a tall glass of water and a water bottle in case he needed more pain medicine in the middle of the night. Laurent took the medicine, laid back down and Damen noticed he fell sleep soon after. 

Damen had brought a couple of books and was reading. Laurent had been sleep for about an hour when Damen heard him gasp and sit up. “No,” he said as he sat up. He raised his knees and put his elbows on them, clasping his left wrist with his right hand. He hung his head. He was taking deep breaths.

Damen said nothing. He put his book down. This was the third time this had happened. Damen knew it had to be the same nightmare. “Wanna talk about it?” Damen asked.

“No,” Laurent said quietly. “Good night,” Laurent said after a moment.

“Good night,” Damen replied and Laurent laid back down and went back to sleep.

* * *

Damen kept waking up. He knew it was his concern for Laurent, he wanted to be available in case he needed anything. He heard Auguste and Ada come home. After a moment he saw the bedroom door open. Damen sat up. “He’s sleep, he ate. He’s ok,” he told Auguste.

Auguste glanced over Laurent and then sat beside Damen at the edge of the bed. “You must think me a shitty brother for not being here for him,” Auguste said.

“No,” Damen replied, furrowing his brow and shaking his head. “No, not at all. I mean I was here and I knew I could take care of him.”

“Yeah,” Auguste said. “That and he likes you.”

Damen froze. “He hates me,” Damen told Auguste. He knew this was a fact. Auguste smiled and shrugged. Damen’s heart was pounding. He took a deep breath in and out. He decided to take this chance to ask Auguste about Laurent. “Was he always...” he drifted off.

“No,” Auguste said softly. “No he was so sweet and gentle as a little kid. A little bookworm, super intelligent,” he said with a smile. “Well, he’s still super intelligent. My father bought him his first violin when he was seven. He was a natural.” Damen nodded.

“When...?” Damen trailed off again.

“The year I went off to Harvard, he was thirteen,” Auguste said. “He shut everyone out. Including me. I tried. So much. For almost the whole year he spoke to no one. He got into fights at school, but his grades were always good. He... hated the world. Everyone said it was delayed reaction from dad passing. I blamed myself, because I left I went to school and thought maybe he felt abandoned. I’ve apologized a million times.” Auguste sighed. “Who knows?” Auguste said glancing over at Laurent. “By the end of the school year, he was fourteen and the anger calmed a little. At fifteen he and I slowly started growing back together. Now, at sixteen we’re almost back to normal but,” Auguste shook his head. “Something... changed.” 

Damen thought of the nightmares and almost said something but decided not to. If Laurent had wanted Auguste to know he would have told him. Maybe he did know but also felt it was too personal for Damen to know. Maybe it was better left unsaid.

“You’re a kind man, Damen,” Auguste said.

Damen breathed out through his nose. “Thank you.”

“You’re... I don’t want to say passive but -“

Damen looked at Auguste. “Foster home after foster home has taught me its better to not resist and just go with the flow,” he said.

“Yeah but today wasn’t going with the flow. You like Laurent too, no?”

Damen chuckled. “You trying to set us up or something?” He asked.

“I just... You’re someone he needs. Your temperament. Your gentility,” Auguste said. “He feels it too he just doesn’t want to accept that he needs anyone,” Auguste shrugged and shook his head showing he didn’t understand that behavior from his little brother.

“You’ve just met me,” Damen said.

“I watched you walk out ofthe ocean with my brother in your arms and I saw the look on your face when Nik’s dad checked him over, is all. But I could have read your expression wrong. I actually have no business meddling there so, Damen, thank you,” Auguste shook his hand. “I appreciate you.”

“Anytime,” Damen said feeling... proud.

“So you’re 18 end of May?”

“Yes and I’ll be leaving the day after,” Damen said. “The home I was in before, was home.” 

“I hope you know you’ll always have a friend in me, Damen,” Auguste told him.

“Thank you I appreciate it,” Damen replied.

“Night,” Auguste said, getting up.

“Night,” Damen said. He watched as Auguste quietly walked out the door and closed it gently behind him.

* * *

Damen had drifted off some time after Auguste had left. He awoke as the sun was beginning to rise. He heard a soft groan beside him and turned his head to see Laurent slowly rise and swing his legs around the side of the bed. Damen sat up and did the same.

“It’s gonna hurt like a bitch today,” Damen said. He reached for the ibuprofen and open it for Laurent. He grabbed the water bottle he had brought the night before and opened it. He handed it all to Laurent.

Laurent glanced up at Damen and slowly took the pills and water bottle. “Thank you,” he whispered.

“We should have applied ice yesterday,” Damen said. “I don’t know why I didn’t think of that.” 

“It’s ok, you did more than enough,” Laurent said. “I don’t want you to miss out on the sailing today,” Laurent said. “Please go, I’ll be fine.” 

“No I’ll stay,” Damen said.

“No, seriously. Go,” Laurent told him not meeting his gaze. 

“Look, I’ve never been sailing and to be honest it’s not like it’s in my top ten of things to do,” Damen said with a shrug. “Plus the whole time I’ll be worried if you’re ok so, I’d rather not.”

Laurent lifted his eyes and stared at him. Damen couldn’t make out his expression. “Worried if I’m ok?”

“Yeah. You’re all sore. Your skinny body got a beating and you’re all useless and dizzy,” Damen said. He saw the Laurent’s lips curl up involuntary into a smile. Laurent tried hide it but Damen had seen it.

“Whatever,” Laurent said, without any iciness in his voice. Damen glanced at him with a smile. He watched as Laurent yawned and slid his legs back in the bed. He leaned back on the headboard and after a moment glanced at Damen. They held each other’s gaze for a moment. Laurent looked away. It wasn’t out of embarrassment or shyness or anything. He merely looked away and closed his eyes and settled back in bed. 

_He likes you,_ Auguste’s words came to Damen. He didn’t act like it, Damen thought. He was cruel as ever. Better forget this, Damen told himself. He turned his back to Laurent and closed his eyes. He sighed. It’s better to forget it, Damen told himself again. He would keep telling himself this until he believed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DARLINGS: I won’t be posting for a week from Dec 25 to Jan 1. I will be back on January 2nd with a chapter to ALL my fics, all my CMBYN fics and my Captive Prince fic. I wish you all a very safe and happy Holiday season! Best wishes to you and your loved ones and family and many blessings for the New Year!  
> Hugs!  
> <3


	11. XI

Damen awoke. The sun was bright and shining in the bedroom. He instinctively turned onto his back and looked towards Laurent’s bed. Laurent was there, in his tank top, quilt wrapped around his waist. He was leaning against the wall, facing Damen. He seemed to be writing in a journal, his face tilted to one side, his hair a soft golden curtain, shimmering in sunlight coming in through the window.

“Writing a love letter?” Damen asked. His voice was still heavy with sleep.

“How did you know?” Laurent asked with out looking up. He was still writing.

Damen grinned. “You had a dreamy look in your eye,” he said.

Laurent grinned back at him, catching his gaze. “Tell me if it’s too much ok?” Laurent asked. 

Damen got up on his elbows, suddenly interested. “Ok,” he said smiling.

Laurent sat up straight and tucked his hair behind his ears. The bruise above his eye brow was bigger than it had been yesterday, Damen noticed painfully. It was a stark against his fair skin. Laurent cleared his throat. “Sweetheart,” he began reading. Damen stared. Laurent had his complete attention. “Since the first day I saw you, you stirred something in my soul. Something I had never felt before.” Laurent put the journal down. He closed his eyes and placed his right hand, still clutching the pen, over his heart. “Your dark hair and rich brown eyes. Your gorgeous tanned skin. You strong biceps,” Laurent continues. Damen felt his cheeks grow hot. “You’re as beautiful physically as you are internally and sometimes, it is just too much for me to handle.” Laurent let out a deep sigh. “Damen,” he said softly. Damen felt a warmth spread all over his body. “Damianos,” Laurent said in the same breathless whisper. “If you would only -“

_Knock Knock_

“Yeah?” Laurent called out. His voice, back to normal. Damen watched as he quickly stuffed the pen into the spine of the journal and the journal back into the bag with their clothing.

“Are you boys decent?” Ada called from behind the door.

“I am, Damen never is,” Laurent called out.

“Damen, honey, come and open the door!” Ada called. Damen quickly rose and was at the door in a few strides. He opened the door and Ada walked in with a tray with food on it. He saw two plates with a stack of pancakes on each, butter and syrup generously on them. A couple of glasses of orange juice and milk and two bowls of mixed berries and a couple of bananas. Damen went to grab it, it looked heavy. “Oh aren’t you a sweetheart?” She said smiling. 

“Are you asking him or telling him?” Laurent called out from his bed.

Ada laughed. “You’re too funny!” She said. “Damen go sit beside Laurent, I brought you boys breakfast.” 

Damen did as he was told. Laurent pulled his quilt up, uncovering where Damen would be sitting. Once Damen had settled beside him, Laurent threw the quilt on top of his lap. Damen felt the sudden warmth of it, having been warmed by Laurent’s body heat, and he felt Laurent’s thigh rub against his own. He tried to not pay attention to it. Ada walked to them and sat the tray on their laps.

“Ada, did you walk this up the stairs by yourself?” Damen asked surprised.

Ada grinned. “Ah, you don’t know! I forget,” she said, sitting at the edge of the bed. “My dad is the owner of Stefano’s,” she said. Damen recognizes the name. They were a very successful chain of Italian restaurants. There were several in the state and they had even expanded to neighboring states.

“Wow,” Damen said.

Ada nodded. “My grandfather started it and now my dad runs them. As a teen I’d waitress in the summers and once I was old enough I’d bartend. In the summer I’ll still go help, so I had no problem with his tray,” she said.

Damen noticed Laurent had already started eating. “I love your pancakes,” he said after he had swallowed a bite. Damen started eating now. 

“I know my Prince De Vere,” she said softly. “How you feeling?” 

“Ok,” he said. “Damen took good care of me.”

“I know,” she said smiling at Damen.

“It’s no big deal,” Damen said. “I’m sure Laurent would have done the same if it was me,” Damen said with a little amusement. 

“I would have love to Damianos if the roles had been reversed, but I don’t know how I would have carried you out of the ocean and on to the shore. At best, I maybe would have dragged you out and collapsed and then needed CPR myself,” Laurent said without missing a beat. Ada giggled and Damen found he couldn’t help but smile.

* * *

The door closed behind Ada as she left. She had stayed and chatted with them as they ate. Auguste also made an appearance and it was decided Laurent would join them sailing after all since he would just be sitting around.

“If I start puking we’re turning around,” Laurent said cooly.

“Nonsense, Damen will be there, he’ll take good care of you!”

“We still have some hours before we go though, you boys rest up,” Ada had said and had left.

Laurent and Damen still sat under Laurent’s quilt, thigh to thigh. Damen had tried not to think about the fact that Laurent hadn’t pulled away. Damen glanced back at Laurent and found Laurent was looking at him. He didn’t show any other emotion though and Damen was truly... puzzled. They were shoulder to shoulder, their faces inches apart.

Laurent didn’t look nervous, didn’t look expectant, he didn’t look unhappy but he didn’t look particularly happy. No... nothing and Damen had never had this. Damen didn’t know if he should lean in for a kiss or run for the hills. They stared at each other for a moment. 

“You gonna finish reading me your letter?” Damen asked.

“I think you got the point,” Laurent said.

“You trying to flirt with me?” Damen asked.

“You’re the experienced Casanova, you should know if I am or am not.”

“You’re not quite like anyone I’ve ever met before so I’m having a hard time reading you.”

“Are you?” Laurent asked lazily. He hadn’t looked away. Anyone else put in this situation would have already looked away, Damen thought. Not Laurent. He never showed weakness or nervousness and his words, Damen had noticed, his mouth, were his weapon.

Damen decided to stop talking before he walked into a trap. He didn’t move, because he liked being close to Laurent, but he did look away. He looked straight ahead at his crumpled bed. He wondered if Laurent had watched him sleep. He thought of the journal. “How long have you kept a journal?”

“Since my father passed.” 

Damen glanced at Laurent and found he was still looking at him. Damen looked away again. “Has it helped you?”

“Yes,” Laurent said. 

“Do you use it to just retell what’s happening in your life or do you use it to sort out your feelings?” Damen asked.

“I use it like anyone uses a journal.”

“Some people use them differently than others,” Damen said.

“How do you use yours?” Laurent asked.

Damen looked at him with a furrowed brow. “I don’t keep one,” he said.

“Then who are you to question how I keep mine?” Laurent asked, a hint of iciness to his tone. 

Damen felt as if Laurent’s walls were coming back up and he was pushing Damen out. From the moment Damen had woken and through breakfast, Laurent seemed somewhat open and relaxed, but now he was shutting himself away. It was infuriating. “You’re so maddening,” Damen said. 

“And yet here you are,” Laurent said making a sweeping up and down motion with his hand at Damen. “Even volunteering to take care of me of I get sick on the sailboat.”

“Technically that was your brother volunteering me,” Damen said. He was going to add, but if you ask me nicely I’ll take care of you, but didn’t. He was right beside him. He didn’t want to poke the sleeping lion.

Damen glanced at Laurent. He was looking straight ahead, his hair falling onto his shoulders, even more golden as a ray of sun softly hit it, illuminating it from the side. Laurent leaned his head back against the wall, exposing his neck and Adam’s Apple and lazily turned his head and gazed at Damen, through his long eyelashes and half lidded eyes. His lips were parted slightly as he took a deep breath in and out.

Again, Damen had no idea what Laurent was feeling or thinking or... anything. He looked over his face. He was wondering if Laurent could tell what he was thinking. He didn’t know. He looked away again and looked straight ahead, also leaning his head back on the wall. They stayed like this for a moment. Damen contemplated this. They were relaxed, the silence didn’t feel hostile or strange. On the contrary, it was nice. Damen was just trying to figure out what Laurent was doing. Did he want to get closer? Did he want Damen to make the first move? No move at all? It was as if Laurent wanted control of how it happened but had no idea how to make whatever he wanted to happen, happen.

Damen wasn’t sure either. He knew he felt like a moth to a flame and couldn’t quite turn away, which is why he stayed by Laurent’s side silently, but he also didn’t want to get burnt, which is why he didn’t make a move either way. For now, he would give Laurent time and space and hopefully his intentions would show themselves clearer. After all, they still had nine and a half months left together.

* * *

They indeed went out sailing. Laurent pulled on another button up shirt, a nice plaid one with hints of blue that matched his eyes perfectly and some white khakis. They had waited until the sun was cooler in the evening to go out. Damen was glad he came. It was an exhilarating experience and August let him drive the small yacht for a while.

Every so often Damen would just cast a look at Laurent and make sure he was ok. On his fourth or fifth occasion, he saw Auguste had seen him looking and smiled at him. Damen couldn’t help but blush. This wasn’t something Damen would normally do but he could still hear Auguste’s voice in his head. _He likes you. You like him._ Damen looked back out into the ocean and steered the boat.

“You’re a natural,” Auguste said. “But I’m not surprised.” 

“Thank you,” Damen said. He quickly glanced at Laurent who he knew had heard it all. For once there wasn’t a snarky comment. He just turned his perfectly pale face up to the sun and closed his eyes.

* * *

Auguste took over as they docked and they all stepped out. Auguste helped Ada and Damen turned and helped Laurent. Damen wanted to and Laurent didn’t object and it felt good doing it.

“Where should we go dine guys?” Auguste asked.

Laurent took a deep breath in and Damen noticed the labored breath out. “You know, I’m actually a bit worn out. You guys could totally go out. I can just go home and relax,” Damen said.

Auguste glanced at him, slightly confused. “That, actually, sounds like a good idea,” Laurent said. “Why don’t you two have a romantic date night?” Laurent said with a slight smile. “Maybe Damen and I can get something else delivered or we can call head?” 

After some talking and deliberating Auguste made the call to a local steakhouse and they went and picked up the food. They were back at the cottage quite quickly and everyone walked back inside the kitchen.

”ok, so you two will be alright?” Auguste asked. He was smiling as he looked back and forth between them.

”Yes,” Damen said, avoiding his eye. He started taking the food out of the paper bags the restaurant had put them in. 

“Hey, Auguste,” Laurent said as he and Damen sat down to eat. “Remember when you had aspirations to be a rock star and you bought yourself like five guitars?” He asked nonchalantly. 

“Yeah,” Auguste said as Ada giggled. “I still play a little,” he said.

“Nice. Where are your guitars?” Laurent asked.

“I have two at home in my closet. One is at Ada’s and the other two are at Harvard with me,” he said. Laurent nodded.

“My dad has an acoustic here in the master bedroom. It’s in the closet in a case,” Ada said.

Laurent nodded and Ada and Auguste left. Ada had kissed them on the cheek and Auguste has patted their shoulders and told them to text if they needed anything.

Damen and Laurent sat at the kitchen island and ate. There was light conversation about music and movies and books. After they had finished eating, Damen collected the food containers and Laurent went upstairs. He came back with the guitar case in hand. “Damianos, you said you played?” Laurent asked. Damen nodded, grinning.

Once everything in the kitchen was done they movedto the living room and Damen sat on the ottoman and picked up the guitar. It was mostly in tune. Damen had to make minimal adjustments. He glanced at Laurent who had a pulled up a knee in the boyish pose he sometimes sat in. Damen liked it when he sat like this. He pictured him younger, when he was happier. Before... before it all.

“Play me your favorite song,” Laurent said quietly.

As with anything else to do with Laurent, it touched Damen deeper than it should have. He wanted to know Laurent’s favorite song. “What’s your favorite?” Damen asked.

“Let’s Get Lost by Beck and Bat For Lashes,” he answered. Damen didn’t know it. He told himself he would find it on YouTube as soon as he could. He then wondered what song to play, he liked so many.

Damen smiled at Laurent. “I don’t know if this is truly my favorite but this is the first song that came to mind,” Damen said. “It’s played in a fast tempo and with drums but, here it goes,” Damen said. He started playing the chords quickly. He really loved this song. He started singing. He sang pretty well.

“Blue morning, blue morning, wrapped in strands of fist and bone. Curiosity, kitten, doesn’t have to mean you're on your own. You can look outside your window, he doesn't have to know, we can talk a while, baby, we can take it nice and slow. All your life is such a shame, shame, shame. All your love is just a dream, dream, dream. Well, are you happy where you're sleepin'? Does he keep you safe and warm? Does he tell you when you're sorry? Does he tell you when you're wrong? Well I've been watching you for hours, it’s been years since we were born. We were perfect when we started, I've been wondering where we've gone. All your life is such a shame, shame, shame. All your love is just a dream, dream, dream.”

Damen glanced at Laurent and was happy to see he had a relaxed look on his faced, lips turned a bit at the corners into a soft smile. He played the guitar a little slower as the song slowed.

“Well, I dreamt I saw you walking up a hillside in the snow, casting shadows on the winter sky, as you stood there counting crows. One for sorrow, two for joy, three for girls and four for boys, five for silver, six for gold, seven for a secret never to be told.”

Damen looked into Laurent’s eyes, who was staring back intently.

“But there's a bird that nests inside you, sleeping underneath your skin. Yeah, when you open up your wings to speak, I wish you'd let me in...”

Damen continued singing the chorus until he finished up the song. When it was over Laurent was still a moment and then clapped. He looked almost deep in thought. He didn’t quite meet Damen’s eye. “That was good. Good song,” he said. “What song was it?” 

“It was Murder of One by Counting Crows,” Damen told him.

Laurent nodded. “It was good.”

They decided to call it a night. They went upstairs. Damen got down to his boxers and got in bed. Laurent too, was in his boxers and Damen saw him get his journal out.

“Writing twice in one day?” Damen asked. He said it with a slightly teasing tone but it was more friendly than anything. 

He liked when he saw Laurent smiled at the comment. “I didn’t quite get to finish this morning,” Laurent said. “I was interrupted by you and Ada and breakfast.” He sounded aloof but Damen knew he wasn’t mad or even annoyed.

“Well, that letter you were reading to me sounded really good. Keep writing more of that,” he said. Laurent looked up from his journal and into Damen’s eyes. Damen gave Laurent a smile. “At your own discretion, of course,” he said softly.

Laurent shook his head and continued writing, but Damen didn’t miss the soft smile on his lips and that made him happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you all Jan 2nd!!  
> Happy Holidays!!  
> <3


	12. XII

It was soft. Damen was surprised at how soft it was because it had been loud enough for Damen to have heard it in his room that other night.

“No.”

It was dark. Damen didn’t know what time it was. He sat up and got out of bed quickly. He wasn’t going to let Laurent suffer, whatever the dream was.

He knelt by his bed. Maybe this would be less scary. “Laurent,” Damen said softly.

“No,” Laurent said.

“Wake up please,” Damen said, he hated this. Laurent awoke with a gasp. “It’s me. It’s me. It’s me, Damen,” he said quickly so he didn’t startle him further.

“Yes... ok,” Laurent said. He sat up and pressed the heels of his palms to his eyes. “Ok,” he said again. His voice sounded... sad. A little hollow.

Damen got up and sat at the edge of the bed. Concern poured over him. Laurent looked at him. There was no rage this time, no pushing Damen away. “I wish I could make the nightmare go away,” Damen said. He meant it. His voice was heavy with emotion. He couldn’t help it. He truly meant it. 

Laurent gazed at him. Damen noticed he had never quite seen that gaze before. It was just as soft. Just as soft as the no...“Kiss me,” Laurent said. Damen was stunned. He must not have heard right, because the thought of it, the mere suggestion of it was... “Damianos,” Laurent said in the faintest of voices, but with authority so as to get Damen’s attention. He slid down the bed, getting closer to Damen. He was sitting up, perfectly still. “Kiss me,” he said. He sounded sure.

Damen should have said no. He should have said it was a bad idea. Maybe the bump to the head had messed with other parts of Laurent’s brain. But the painful truth was that Damen wanted to kiss him SO badly. He wanted to press their lips together. He wanted Laurent to feel how much he made him feel and in return he wanted to feel how much he made Laurent feel, if he made him feel anything at all. He was thinking of nothing else. He just wanted to kiss him. Damen shifted his body and slid just slightly closer. He leaned in, they were sharing the same warm breath for a small moment. “Are you sure?” Damen asked

They looked into each other’s eyes. Laurent nodded and the tips of their noses touched. Laurent was perfectly still. Damen lifted his left hand, running his thumb softly over Laurent’s cheekbone and then slid it behind Laurent’s neck, slowly sliding it up into his hair. Laurent was shaking. Damen furrowed his brow, and leaned back a bit, so as to take a better look at Laurent. “Do it,” Laurent said again.

“Are you scared?” Damen asked.

“No,” Laurent said.

“You don’t have to be -“

“I’m not.”

“I would never hurt you.”

Laurent let out a ragged breath and closed his eyes. Damen leaned in and as gently as he could, pressed his lips to Laurent’s. Damen had never been more careful. He was afraid one wrong or sudden move would make Laurent push him away again. Laurent’s tense muscles started to give way a little. Damen kissed him but didn’t push in or tried to take control. He wanted Laurent to feel in control, to feel comfortable and to want it.

Laurent, seemed to relax a slight bit. He tilted his head and leaned in for the next kiss. Their lips pressed together harder and longer. To Damen’s surprise, Laurent’s soft lips opened up slightly and Damen’s tongue gently grazed the inside of them. He licked his lips and teeth. They pulled back and took a breath.

Laurent leaned in, their chests were touching. Laurent’s arms reached up and wrapped around Damen neck. Damen wrapped his arms around Laurent. He had been wanting this and he couldn’t believe it was happening. He tried to keep as much control of himself as possible. To not act without thinking or to push or want too much. His heart was thumping so fast and hard, Laurent must feel it, Damen thought.

The last kiss was the deepest. Laurent opened his mouth fully and Damen slid his tongue inside. They held each other and with this kiss, Damen the felt the stirring of want deep within him. They pulled apart and as Damen ran his hand gently down Laurent’s back he laid his lips on Laurent’s neck. Laurent froze. He wasn’t expecting that. Damen stayed still until Laurent tilted his head and gave Damen room to continue. He did, softly and gently, down his neck, across his collar bone, Laurent’s heart was racing. Damen loved how his pulse felt under his lips. He continued to kiss up, right under his jaw. It was soft, it was sweet.

They pulled apart and looked at one another. Laurent’s breathing was shallow. Damen slowly dropped his hands, his fingertips grazing the soft skin on Laurent’s back on the way down. Laurent sat back and nodded. Damen nodded back, not sure what else to do. After a while, Laurent turned and laid on his right side, facing the wall, his back to Damen. Damen watched as he scooted closer to the wall, as if making room. Damen’s heart thumped hard in chest again. He lifted Laurent’s quilt, the same one they had shared earlier. He laid beside Laurent, his eyes on Laurent’s golden hair, which looked silvery in the moonlight.

After what they had just shared, it would seem normal to put an arm around Laurent and pull him close, and Damen would have done that if it had been anyone else that he had kissed. But Laurent didn’t fit the mold of anyone else Damen had ever met and so did not know how to proceed. He took a deep breath in and out as he settled behind Laurent. He was close, he could feel Laurent’s body heat and he was sure Laurent could feel his.

He had told Laurent he wished he could make the nightmare go away and maybe this was Laurent showing him how he could help. There was a small shift in Laurent and he seemed to sink into his pillow. Damen laid still. After a moment he heard Laurent’s long, slow, steady breaths. Damen knew he was asleep. He thought he could finally sleep too now. If Laurent awoke, he would be right there.

* * *

Damen rolled onto his back and his left arm fell off the side of the bed. He blinked at the bright sun shining in. He suddenly remembered. Last night. The dream. Laurent. Their kiss. _KISSES._ He sat up and saw the bed is empty beside him. All that’s left of Laurent is the imprint of his body on the bed and on his pillow. Damen rolled to his side and ran his hand over the area. It was still slightly warm. He hadn’t been up that long, Damen thought and he got up and pulled on a shirt and shorts and walked downstairs.

He can hear chatter and Ada laughing as he jogs down the stairs.

“Damen!” She called out when she saw him. “Perfect timing, I was about go up and wake you. Did you sleep well?” She asked.

“Yes, very well, thank you,” he said. The dining table here was round and for four. It was crammed with a bowl of scrambled eggs and another bowl with bacon and another with sausage links. There was also buttermilk biscuits and toast and amazingly a tall stack of pancakes. He sat between Ada and Laurent. He had carefully kept his eyes away, but as he reached for the bowl of eggs his eyes lifted and he, surprisingly, was met with a blue gaze that wasn’t cold or hard. Damen have him a soft smile. Laurent didn’t smile back. He looked away but Damen saw an unmistakable pink blush on his cheeks. That was enough to send Damen’s heart into a frenzy.

It wasn’t a dream. Laurent had asked for Damen to kiss him and Damen had and then they had shared a bed. Damen had been careful not to touch him all night. Damen wanted Laurent to know he was in control of how fast they moved. Damen couldn’t help but smile as he got some bacon and sausages. He let out a happy sigh. 

He looked up and saw Ada looking between him and Laurent with a smile on her face. Damen looked away. He wanted to keep this secret between him and Laurent for as long as possible.

* * *

They went to the beach for a while and then had a late lunch. They then went back and relaxed a couple of hours, listened to some music. Then it was finally time to pack. Everyone went upstairs and Laurent and Damen were alone for the first time since...

Through out the day they had shared some glances and had spoken but it was general conversation as Ada and Auguste had been there.

Now in the bedroom and by themselves, the air felt electric. Damen had been on cloud nine all day. He was busy folding clothes and just enjoying the fact that Laurent had been the most happy he had seen him and his biting remarks had been held to a minimum.

“You didn’t try to touch me last night,” Laurent said out of no where.

Damen looked up. He gave Laurent a smile. “No,” he said. “Not because I didn’t want to, but because I want you to know that the pace that we move at, anything we do,” Damen said as he looked at him. “It’s up to you.”

“We,” Laurent said. “You’re taking liberties.”

Damen looked up at Laurent but he didn’t look upset. “I apologize,” he said with a half smile.

Laurent sat on his bed, pulling his knee up. “At my pace?” Laurent said. “You think I’m a virgin? You think I need my hand held through this?” 

Damen sat on his bed as well, facing Laurent. He looked at him and waited for a while until Laurent lifted his gaze to Damen. “Whether you are or aren’t -“ 

“I’m not,” Laurent said.

“Ok,” Dame said, shrugging. “Neither am I. I don’t care. I just care about you feeling safe and not rushed.”

“Do you prefer women to men?” Laurent asked. 

“It depends on the person,” Damen answered truthfully.

“There’s lots of pretty girls at school,” Laurent said. His words were rushed. Damen looked at him surprised. “Lots of good looking guys too,” he said with a shrug.

“I don’t doubt it,” Damen said looking out the window. “But it seems I have a thing for mouthy blonds with blue eyes, and perfect feints and parries,” Damen said returning his gaze to Laurent.

Laurent blushed at that. He then furrowed his brow. “It’s infuriating,” Laurent said.

“What?”

“Your good guy persona. Your kindness. Your smile.”

“What’s wrong with my smile?” Damen asked. Laurent shook his head. “Oh you like it. You like my smile,” Damen said, smiling of course. “Does it make you melt a little inside?” Damen couldn’t help teasing.

“Shut up,” Laurent said and threw a shirt at him. He picked up his clothes and put it in the bag sitting down on Damen’s bed now. Damen put his clothes inside and sat down beside Laurent. He wanted to reach out and hold Laurent’s hand but that wasn’t letting Laurent take it at his pace.

“I could, if you wanted of course, I could spend the night with you again,” Damen said. “Just like last night,” he added.

Laurent let out a sigh. “And you promise to protect my honor and not touch me?” He asked.

“I told you, it would be at your pace.” 

“Of course,” Laurent said. Damen felt as if he was trying to sound aloof or cold but it didn’t come across as that.

They looked at one another. The bruise above Laurent’s brow was a dull yellow at the edges. They got up and put their shoes on and Damen grabbed their bag and they made their way downstairs. They climbed in the car and soon enough they were driving back to Rhode Island.

Laurent was relaxed and happy. He and Damen whispered together in the back seat on their way back. In a moment of silence Damen looked out the window. He felt as if Laurent had opened up to him and he wanted more. It was intoxicating. Laurent was like no one he had ever met. He glanced at him now. His perfect profile, long eyelashes and his golden hair. Damen sighed. Maybe it wasn’t that bad being fostered by Mr. De Vere after all.


	13. XIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Warning: there will be some non con elements in this chapter._

They had maybe 45 minutes left in their journey and Laurent heard Damen sigh. It sounded exactly like the sigh of someone thinking about their lover. Laurent smiled. Maybe Damen was sighing about him? Laurent looked out the window and pushed the thought out of his head. Thoughts like that made him feel like an idiot.

‘I wish I could make the nightmare go away,’ Damen had said and Laurent had believed him. His eyes were so honest. He was a horrible liar, his eyes always gave his true emotions away. ‘I would never hurt you,’ he had also said. Laurent believed that too.

Laurent remembered the tightness in his chest and how handsome Damen looked and... ‘kiss me,’ Laurent had said. It had been amazing. Amazing. Laurent let out a sigh as well. It was most unfortunate that Damen had come during this time. This was when his nightmares always happened because it had been Labor Day weekend. Even if he didn’t want to remember, it was tied to that holiday and well...

For the first three years after his father’s death Laurent had been safe because Auguste had been home. Then Auguste had gone off to Harvard. His uncle hadn’t wasted anytime. Laurent was 13. He had taken Laurent out to lunch. Then, over dessert he had started asking Laurent if he would miss Auguste. He had said yes and his tears had started and they had gone home. Laurent wasn’t sure why uncle had led him back to his bedroom. It was the middle of the day.

He had held Laurent and put him on his lap, and told him he would take care of him. Then he began to undress him. Laurent never thought of the actual act. He just remembered after. The pain. The confusion. They had dinner at home a few hours later and his uncle acted like nothing had happened and so did Laurent because what else was he supposed to do? What if the staff found out? He was embarrassed.

He remembered after dinner he ran to his bedroom and stripped the sheets off the bed because there were signs there of what happened. He remembered going to the basement to wash them and realized he didn’t know how to work the washing machine. He had thrown up all over the sheets then. All of his dinner. A maid had come and found him. She had taken the sheets. Then led him back to his room.

He threw up after he ate breakfast the next day and his uncle thought he was sick and left him alone. School had begun two days later and Laurent had a hard time concentrating and hadn’t wanted to talk to any of the silly children in his class. He had gotten into fights in school and it had angered his uncle and he had left him alone.

But the anger passed, and apart from doing things to Lauren, he made Laurent use his hands. His mouth. Laurent paid attention to what uncle liked so it would be over soon. He hated how uncle always caressed his face. Laurent now hated to be touched. He told Laurent he was so pretty. Laurent now hated to be called pretty. Laurent also got good at looking like everything was ok. Any member of staff might see him as he excited his uncle’s room or home office and they couldn’t know what had happened. No one could know. He wondered if any knew. They should all be fired, he had always thought. It finally stopped in the spring. Laurent had had a growth spurt and his voice began to change and uncle became uninterested.

He glanced at Damen and wondered what he would think if he knew what the nightmare wasabout, what he would think of Laurent. No one would want to know this, this wasn’t something anyone wanted to hear, Laurent had always told himself. It’s the reason he kept everyone at bay. It was easier to be cold and hateful because more often than not he just wanted to be separate from everything and everyone. Except Auguste. Except Erasmus and now, except Damen. Damen. With his kind eyes and his cute smile and his promises of keeping him safe and not hurt him.

Laurent hadn’t expected to feel what he felt. He wanted to hate Damen. It was easy... until it wasn’t and he found himself wanting to know him more. He recalled how Damen had washed his hair. He enjoyed the touch. He had never wanted to be touched. But he had enjoyed Damen’s touch. He enjoyed everything about Damen. Then he thought of Damen playing the guitar and singing for him. “When you open up your wings to speak I wish you’d let me in...” 

His eyes were still on Damen when he turned and looked at Laurent and smiled. It was a sweet smile, it wasn’t covering anything up. It just was. It was easy for Damen to show affection. He had had pain, the loss of his father and being in foster homes, but Damen still held on to his charm and easy smiles and laughs. And Laurent liked it. Laurent then remembered when he had heard Damen and Eloise.... it had just been so easy for them. Laurent hadn’t much cared then, and had even used it to make himself dislike Damen more. Then he had stood up for a person he barely knew because he felt it was the right thing to do. Laurent had been impressed and he also knew he didn’t want Damen to have sex with Eloise again. He didn’t want to think about that now though.

Damen was kind and he hadn’t been any different with Laurent and Laurent had just wanted to spend more time with him. Then... the way Damen looked at him had changed. Laurent had noticed and he had surprisingly not minded, as much as he had wanted to. Whenever anyone looked at him like that, Laurent stared them down, intimidated them, murdered them with his eyes, and made them feel small with his vicious words. He hadn’t wanted to do that with Damen.

Laurent thought back of the night the nightmare had happened and Damen had come and for the first time ever, Laurent wasn’t alone. And he remembered his moment of weakness. How he had thrown his arms around him and then their chests had touched and it had felt good...and it scared him and he had pushed Damen away. He wasn’t even sure if Damen had hugged him back. It had happened fast.

Everyone liked Damen. It was a weird feeling... Laurent liked that people liked Damen but then he found he didn’t want to share Damen with anyone. That was new to Laurent too. Then his accident. He vaguely remembered Damen pulling him out of the water and placing him on the sand and he remember grabbing his hand to make sure he didn’t leave him, that he didn’t leave him alone, and he hadn’t. He had asked Damen who had pulled him out of the water because he had wanted Damen to tell him WHY he had done it. He had wanted to hear Damen maybe confess to some feelings...

‘I’ve seen kids that were abused,’ Damen had said. He sounded sad for them yes, but... but maybe Damen would understand? Laurent became angry at himself. No, Damen wouldn’t. He would just pity him. He looked at Damen again and almost instantly, Damen look back at him and smiled his cute smile. ‘Does it make you melt a little inside?’ He had asked. Laurent felt himself smile back. He lowered his lashes. Then looked up again. Laurent was flirting. Damen’s smiled widened. Laurent liked it.

* * *

Auguste and Ada were staying for dinner. They would leave tomorrow. Laurent trailed a little behind them as everyone walked to the house and sure enough, Damen slowed so as not to leave Laurent behind. Laurent controlled himself and made sure he didn’t smile. He didn’t want to seem like an eager puppy.

“What if we got something to eat from the kitchen and ate in my room?” He heard himself say. His heart pounded but he was sure it wasn’t noticeable, his voice was steady.

“Like some sandwiches and fruits?” Damen asked him. His excitement was so apparent. It was adorable.

“Yeah, sure,” Laurent said. “Ask your girlfriend to prepare it for us,” he said. He had meant to say it as a joke but... 

Damen gave him a hurt look. “She’s not -“

“I know. Sorry.” Laurent said quickly. Damen looked shocked. Laurent rolled his eyes. He could count in one hand the times he had said sorry in the last year. He wished Damen wouldn’t look at him like THAT. Laurent looked away. Looked at the grounds around the home. “Unless you want a real picnic, that may be nicer actually,” he said. 

Damen was still looking at him with those happy and surprised eyes and Laurent felt the warmth spread through his chest. “We’ll do whatever you want,” Damen said. Of course he would say that. That was just him.

Laurent nodded. They had been walking very slowly. “Oh, there’s, something else,” Laurent said, he thought of the school uniform upstairs in Damen’s closet. They walked inside. Uncle was there with Auguste. Laurent walked by briskly. He thought of nothing else but to get away from him.

“Laurent, come please.” His voice filled the entrance hallway. Laurent turned and walked to him. He faced him but didn’t look at him. He crossed his arms and his eyes landed on Damen. ‘Damianos,’ he said in his head. He liked his name. “Oh, my poor boy,” uncle said and made as if he wanted to touch his forehead. Laurent jerked back. The thought of uncle’s hands on him made him want to throw up.

“Unlucky for you the blow didn’t kill me,” Laurent said, bile in his voice. 

“Oh,” Uncle said and stared at Laurent. “I’ll be in my office until dinner,” he said and walked away. Acting the victim was a specialty of his. Once he was gone everyone turned to Laurent. ‘I’m the villain, of course,’ Laurent thought. 

“Sweetie,” Ada said, still looking shocked. 

“Little brother,” Auguste said with an ache in his voice. 

Laurent looked at his brother. “You’re not gonna take over the hotels. I am when I’m 21. If I die he gets to keep them, believe me, if I end up dead one day it’s him.”

Auguste’s eyes looked shocked and sad when he said it.

Auguste was very sensitive. That’s the reason Laurent had never told him. Auguste would take the burden as his own. He already thought Laurent resented him for leaving. He didn’t. He never had. Uncle had chosen to do what he did and he would have done it one way or another. Auguste would feel he let Laurent down when it wasn’t his fault. He knew it would hurt Auguste so much... he didn’t deserve the pain so Laurent would just never tell him. 

“Laurent, words are hurtful,” Auguste whispered. 

“Yes, they are,” Laurent agreed.

Auguste embraced him. “I’m here whenever you need me,” he whispered.

“I know big brother,” Laurent told him. He knew this was true. They pulled apart. “Come on Damen,” Laurent said. Damen nodded and walked by and Laurent followed him up the stairs. He walked behind Damen, trailing him and entered his room behind him.

“Laurent, why would you say that?” Damen asked him.

Laurent had been lost in thought and it took a moment for him to realize Damen was referring to what he had said to his uncle. “Because it’s the truth,” he told Damen. He didn’t want to talk about how he had hurt his uncle’s feelings. It was insane. 

“Your uncle cares,” Damen whispered. “He’s worried -“ 

“Enough!” Laurent said. He felt like he might throw up again. Damen, of course, didn’t know but it still hurt to have him defend that monster. “Don’t speak to me about him.”

Silence. “So a picnic?” Damen asked trying to recapture the sliver of happiness that had been.

“Fuck picnics,” Laurent said. He wasn’t hungry anymore. He was nauseous. He saw the painful look in Damen’s eye. He hated it but he felt he couldn’t stop himself. “Fuck you and fuck picnics.” He dumped the content of the bag they had shared in Damen’s bed.

“Ok, you’re upset,” Damen said.

Laurent laughed. “How fucking observant. Want a fucking treat for that?” Laurent didn’t really know how to stop it even if he wanted to. ‘Why would you defend my uncle?!’ He wanted to scream but he couldn’t. He just wanted to lash out and hurt Damen. Maybe if Damen hated him he just stop talking. Laurent just wanted.. just needed him to stop talking.

“Laurent,” Damen said stepping to him and he placed a hand on Laurent’s arm. Laurent did it before he was even aware. He yanked back and punched. With all his might. NO ONE TOUCHES ME! Laurent thought in a panic. Damen was not expecting it. Laurent’s fist connected with his jaw and Damen staggered back. His eyes were wide with shock.

“No one touches me,” Laurent said softly and venomously as Damen rubbed his jaw. “So much for taking it at my pace,” Laurent almost growled with anger. “Fucking liar.” He said in a most viscous way. He wished to hurt Damen as much as he hurt at that moment.

He finally had all his clothes. He walked out the room and went into his room. Laurent dropped the bag. He looked down at the hand he had used to punch Damen. It was shaking. Laurent calmed his breathing and willed his hand to stop shaking. It finally did. It hurt. A lot. Laurent didn’t care. He kicked off his shoes. He took of his shirt and pants. Laurent needed to sleep. He wanted the world to quit existing for a while and he himself wanted to disappear.

* * *

Uncle was in his room. “Laurent, you don’t want to upset me do you?” 

“No.” Laurent answered him.

Uncle was sitting down on his bed and pulling Laurent close. “You don’t want to make uncle sad do you?”

“No.”

“Good boy. Come here.”

No, he wished to say but no words came out. Uncle’s hands were on him. No.

“Laurent,” he heard. “Wake up please.” The voice was calming. Laurent opened his eyes and found Damen sitting by him. “Hey,” he said softly. 

Laurent sat up and calmed his breathing. He spoke when he knew his voice would be steady. “I’m fine now. Leave.” Laurent didn’t think he had it in him to socialize. Damen didn’t move. Of course not. He wanted to make Laurent feel better. “Do you want to kiss me again? Was I that good?”

“That was the first time you were kissed,” Damen said softly. He wasn’t asking.

Laurent blushed. He was glad the darkness of his room hid it. Damen was right. It had been his first time. Had it been that obvious? “Here to rub it in then,” Laurent said coldly. “Was Eloise better?”

“No! No she wasn’t and that’s not what -“ Damen sighed. Laurent stared. She wasn’t... “I’m just confused,” he said softly. “You said you weren’t a virgin,” Damen said.

“I’m not,” Laurent replied. He wasn’t. Laurent wasn’t lying. 

“So you didn’t kiss?” Damen asked looking confused.

Laurent couldn’t deal with this right now. “Don’t think about it too hard, your head will start smoking,” he said.

Damen gave an exasperated sigh. “You’re so confusing,” Damen said. “So infuriating. Your mouth is vicious. Your eyes are deadly. You pull me in just to spit me out.” 

“And yet here you are,” Laurent said and he’s suddenly smiling without meaning to.

Damen, of course, noticed. “Oh you’re smiling. If I didn’t know any better I’d say you enjoy torturing me,” he said.

Laurent chuckled. He tried to look at anywhere but at Damen but couldn’t. He had liked kissing him. He liked how he just forgot everything. How everything just melted away. And then he felt that warmth inside. That warmth he hadn’t felt in a long time or well, maybe he had never felt it the way Damen made him feel it. “Was it bad?” Laurent asked. 

“What?” Damen asked, brow furrowed. 

Laurent forced himself to stay calm. “The kiss. Was it -“

“Oh!” Damen said. “No! No it wasn’t,” he said smiling widely. Laurent could tell he was remembering. “No, it was really nice and soft,” he whispered. “I really liked it,” he said. Laurent looked at him as he spoke. Damen looked at Laurent and gave him a wide smile.

Again, Laurent was smiling without meaning to. He tentatively reached out and placed a hand on Damen’s chest. It was warm. Laurent slid his hand across it and then pulled his hand back.

“So you can touch me but I can’t touch you?” Damen asked.

“Yes,” Laurent answered.

Damen nodded. “What if I want to touch you?”

Laurent felt his heart pounding. YOU CAN’T his brain screamed. “Touch how?” he asked.

Damen lifted his hand and swept a soft thumb across Laurent’s cheek and then... across his bottom lip. Laurent felt a fire in his chest. He forced himself to breathe long and slow so as to control his feelings. “Was that ok?” Damen asked.

Laurent nodded. “Yes.”

“Can I,” Damen said but stopped.

Laurent knew. He knew what Damen was asking. ‘It’s a bad idea,’ his brain said. It could lead to more questions and then one day you may have to explain and - “Yes,” Laurent said. 

Damen looked surprised. Laurent sat up straight. Damen did as well. Laurent sat very still because he wasn’t comfortable with touching, both touching or being touched. He just waited. Damen looked at him. “You’re sure? We -“

“Yes!” He said. His heart started to race. Damen wasn’t moving. If he didn’t do it soon Laurent was going to loose his nerve. Damen moved closer. Laurent leaned in slightly. He closed his eyes and waited.

Damen’s lips were soft and gentle. Just like they had been the first time. They stayed on his for a while and Laurent really liked them. Laurent was ready to part his lips when Damen, again, kissed down his neck. Laurent was surprised by this again, but the shock wore off and this time he actually enjoyed the feel of Damen’s lips on his neck. It felt like nothing he had felt before. The bedroom melted away. This was all he was focused on.

A soft sound escaped Laurent’s lips. Damen paused a moment when he heard it and smiled. “You like this?” He asked.

“Yes,” Laurent replied. Laurent’s body was reacting to Damen’s lips even as his mind was telling him to stop him. But his mind was slowly becoming foggy and Laurent was just enjoyed this. Enjoying not thinking about everything. Damen was slow and gentle and careful. He wasn’t rushing and he wasn’t aggressive. 

Damen’s lips found their way to Laurent’s. There was a moment spent just kissing softly and then Damen pulled back. Laurent blinked a couple of times. The world rushed back. But it wasn’t so bad. He looked at Damen. He didn’t know what to say but felt there was so much to be said. He didn’t know what to do now.

“Ready to sleep?” Damen asked. That made sense. Sleep. Laurent nodded. He laid down. Damen laid down as well, they were facing one another. Damen gave him a smile. Laurent turned his back to Damen.

‘I’ve seen plenty of kids who were abused,’ Damen’s voice played in his head. Laurent had figured he would never tell anyone because, who would want to hear this? But Damen had already heard from someone else. He wouldn’t be the first. ‘I don’t enjoy seeing anyone in pain,’ said Damen’s voice in his mind. ‘I would never hurt you.’ Laurent shook his head. He tried to push the thoughts away. Laurent didn’t want to need anyone. Auguste was his brother, that was different. Damen would start school on Tuesday and he would meet... less complicated and more willing teens.

“Good night. I’ll be here. I won’t let the nightmare hurt you,” he said.

Laurent stayed quiet. Why did he say these things? Laurent had no defense for these words. They sunk in. He couldn’t help but believe and... and maybe trust? As much as Laurent wanted to push him away, it just felt so good to not be alone.

Laurent scooted back, closer to Damen. Amazingly, Damen still didn’t throw an arm around him. An arm that would feel like suffocation. Instead he leaned his head slightly forward, his breath on Laurent’s back. It was like a reminder to Laurent. I’m here. But he wasn’t imposing. He wasn’t possessive. He was just there. And for right now, that was more than enough for Laurent. He closed his eyes and easily fell into a dreamless sleep


	14. XIV

Laurent awoke first. He shifted and became aware of Damen. He seemed to be resting his cheek on the back of Laurent’s shoulder. It was warm. Peaceful. Comforting. He stayed still a moment, until it wasn’t warm, peaceful or comforting anymore. He pulled away and stretched. Damen stirred and awoke. He stretched and laced his fingers under his head and looked up at Laurent with his sweet smile.

Laurent’s eyes passed over his chest then back to his face. Damen didn’t just smile with his mouth. His whole face lit up, his eyes twinkled. Laurent wasn’t going to deny it anymore. He thought Damen was incredibly good looking. He looked away and got off his bed. He grabbed some black jogging pants and caught sight of Damen on his bed in the stand up mirror he had. Relaxed, hair tussled. He was looking out the window. If anyone saw this they would assume Laurent and Damen were lovers and that last night they had...

Laurent stopped. No. No. Laurent would never do that with anyone. Just like you said you’d never kiss anyone? Laurent’s inner voice said. He pulled his pants on. Damen looked at Laurent and smiled at the way his jogging pants hung off his hips. Laurent’s physique was ridiculously perfect and Damen couldn’t keep his eyes off him for long. Damen stretched and got up. He had come here in the middle of the night with sleep shorts on and nothing else.

“I’m gonna go get dressed,” he said.

“Wait,” Laurent said. Damen watched as he pulled a long sleeved black tee shirt on.

“You gonna put your hair up?” Damen asked.

Laurent looked at him. “What?”

“Just I’ve noticed whenever you’re wearing joggers you tend to put your hair up.”

Laurent blinked. “Do you like it up?”

Damen seemed to think about it. “It looks good both ways,” he said.

Laurent was still for a few seconds. He then reached for a hair tie and put his hair up. He felt a warming on his cheeks as Damen smiled. “Come on, need to show you something,” Laurent said ignoring the smile and ignoring the blush he knew was obvious on his pale cheeks.

* * *

“So, six pairs of pants, three gray and three khaki, two navy blue blazers, two gray pull overs, two navy blue pull overs, two gray vests, two navy blue vests, five long sleeve white shirts and five short sleeved white shirts and five ties,” Laurent said. The ties were navy blue with a diagonal red line and the school’s golden crest. They were standing in Damen’s walk in closet.

Damen was frozen on the spot. Laurent then pointed to the shelves in the closet. “I also got you some gym uniforms, three winter sets and three summer sets and also,” Laurent pulled a large gray hoodie. It said Collins Trojans on it with a picture of the mascot. “I wasn’t sure what size shoe you wore but I got size 12 and a half.”

Laurent pointed to the shoes on the floor. There were two pairs of black tie up dress shoes as well as a pair of black leather pull on boots and new combat boots. They looked expensive like the ones Laurent wore. There were also three different styles of running shoes. All Nike. “I wear twelve and a half,” he said.

Laurent nodded and looked at Damen who stayed frozen. Laurent wasn’t sure what to think of Damen’s lack of a reaction. “Do you require more?” 

“No!” Damen said. “Isn’t it... excessive?” Damen asked.

Laurent stared at him. “You’ll be wearing this five days a week. I think it’s adequate.”

“Ok, whatever you say,” Damen said. Laurent looked at him and furrowed his brow slightly. He stood there looking at the dry cleaned uniforms in Damien’s closet.

“Uh, so when did you even get this?” Damen asked. “You never even asked me what size clothes or shoes I wear,” Damen said.

“I have personal shoppers at my disposal. Also, I told you, you and Auguste are practically the same size you just have more,” and without thinking he gently wrapped his hand around Damen’s bicep and squeezed. His hand was only there a few seconds before he removed it but it was long enough for Damen to smile widely. That smile. That smile that _yes_ made Laurent melt a little inside.

“So what do you like more, the smile or the biceps?” Damen asked.

Laurent forced himself to not show any emotion. He blinked. “I think they’re both... satisfactory,” Laurent said.

Damen laughed. They walked out of the closet and Damen dressed. They then walked downstairs. Laurent wondered if uncle was there what he would do. But he didn’t have anything to worry about, he didn’t show and so Damen, Laurent, Auguste and Ada had a pleasant brunch. Damen sat beside Laurent. Neither one of them missed the way Ada was glancing between them and smiling.

“Something on your mind Ada?” Laurent asked. 

“No, Prince De Vere,” she said with the same smile. Laurent rolled his eyes which made her giggle more. 

“Why do you call him Prince?” Damen asked. He had wondered this when he heard her refer to Laurent as such in the Hamptons.

“Le Petit Prince is Laurent’s favorite book, well, was as a child growing up,” Auguste said fondly. “I read it to him and we talked about it countless times.” 

“And Laurent is as handsome as any Prince Charming gets,” Ada said.

Damen smiled and imagine Laurent as a child. Carefree. Blond hair messy, blue eyes wild and wanting to maybe play pretend in the universe of the book. “Do you know it?” Laurent asked Damen.

“Yes, I’ve read it,” Damen said. Laurent nodded.

They continued conversing and laughing through brunch. Eloise came out and cleared some dishes away. Laurent tended to ignore her since she was truly insignificant to him but he suddenly remembered the comment Damen had made about her and her breasts. He glanced at her now and was surprised to feel... something not so pleasant. He remembered thought, he promised Damen he wouldn’t fire her.

He force himself to look elsewhere and involved himself in the conversation at hand.

* * *

Ada and Auguste didn’t stay for lunch since they were driving back to Harvard. Instead Auguste went into the kitchen and asked the staff if they could prepare some food he and Ada could take with them and they gladly made him an array of sandwiches and a fruit salad and any other food they could ready quickly. 

Damen watched as Auguste and Laurent hugged. He smiled when Laurent laid his head on Auguste’s shoulder. He looked his age then... but he had been looking more and more his age in front of Damen since... they had kissed. Damen wanted to do it more. Wanted to take his time and kiss him slowly like Laurent seemed to like.

Damen didn’t want to think about the fact that he had been Laurent’s first kiss. It still didn’t seem real. A boy that incredibly good looking and he had told Damen he wasn’t a virgin... Damen sighed. Laurent didn’t make sense, he didn’t fit the pattern of any other boy or girl Damen had dated.

Dated. Damen huffed slightly. They had only kissed twice. That was hardly ‘dating.’ Regardless, Damen had decided that he would let Laurent set the pace for anything physical that happened. They had kissed and it had been Laurent’s first time and even though he had said he was not a virgin, the experience, Damen decided, could NOT have been a good one if the person hadn’t even kissed Laurent.

Maybe it had been a girl, Damen though, and maybe he had realized that was not what he wanted. Damen quit thinking about it, as Laurent’s sexual experience, or lack there of, was not important to him. Any first Laurent experienced with him, he would be proud of. 

As Auguste and Laurent were hugging and saying goodbye their uncle came out to bid him farewell as well. Damen saw the way Laurent just changed. He again wondered what happened there. Laurent pulled back and came to stand on the other side of Damen, as if putting Damen between him and his uncle.

Damen had been 13 when he got put into the foster care system, older than about 75% of the kids he was around. At times when they couldn’t find foster homes they were taken to hotel rooms and during the summer, when there was no school, they would be taken to YMCAs for recreation. Damen had been around many children who had been abused physically, mentally and sexually and what Laurent had done right now, move away and put Damen between himself and his uncle made Damen wonder about Laurent’s relationship with Mr. De Vere. 

“Damianos,” Mr. De Vere said. He turned to face him. “My nephew Auguste has nothing but praise for you,” he said.

“Thank you, Auguste,” he said looking at him and smiling.

“No. Thank you. It’s great you and Laurent seem to get along. Uncle, please, make sure you send Damen to Harvard,” he said with a grin. 

Damen felt his stomach clench. “Oh, no, no -“

“I will work on it!” Mr. De Vere said. He hugged Auguste a final time and put an arm around Ada. Damen glanced at Laurent and saw he was a few more paces away than he had been. Damen took a few steps in his direction. Auguste and Ada took off. Damen turned and started closing the distance between he and Laurent.

“What are you two up to?” Mr. De Vere said. There was an edge to his voice Damen had never heard before.

“We’re going out,” Laurent said.

“Are you?” Mr. De Vere asked. He started walking to them and Damen took a small step to the side and placed himself between he and Laurent. Mr. De Vere took notice, which surprised Damen. If Mr. De Vere didn’t mean to intimidate, Damen’s small side step would have meant nothing. “Where are you two going Damen?” He asked.

“I need some school supplies,” Damen said. “We’re just going to the mall or whatever is close to here. I’m not too familiar with the area but I told Laurent I needed some things for school,” he said in a relaxed tone.

Mr. De Vere stood and pondered this for a while. He seemed satisfied with Damen’s answer. “Very well,” he said clasping his hands behind his back. “I will remind you both together that curfew is 10 pm on school nights and 11 pm when school is off the next day. If you visit a friend I must know who and have a phone number I can reach a guardian of the home at. No sleep overs at any one else’s home, they can come and spend the night here. No drinking. No smoking. Grades will be kept up and I will not tolerate any disagreeable behavior. Am I making myself clear?” 

“Yes,” Damen and Laurent said.

Mr. De Vere seemed pleased with this. “Very well. Laurent run along inside I need to speak to Damen privately. Maybe you should cut your hair while in town.”

“No it suits him,” Damen said without thinking. Both De Vere men looked at him but he straightened his shoulders and stood his ground. “You look great with it. If you want to trim it though, that would be up to you. But if you want it long, keep it long.”

Laurent’s lips had a hint of a smile and he turned and walked away. Damen smiled after him. Mr. De Vere took a small step towards Damen. Damen knew he was trying to appear larger than he was, as if to intimidate Damen. That may work on Laurent, Damen thought, but I’m an inch or two taller than you.

“You seem quite taken by my nephew,” Mr. De Vere said. “I should have guessed his pretty face would have bewitched you.” Damen looked at Mr. De Vere. He couldn’t make out if he was angry or not. “Will that affect our agreement?” He asked.

“I don’t remember agreeing to anything,” Damen said in a steady voice.

“I see,” Mr. De Vere said.

Damen gave him a smile. “Sir,” he said. He had been thinking about this. “I have seen how much you care for Laurent. I see how well you take care of him and I have seen Laurent’s questionable behavior,” Damen said. He waited.

“Go on,” Mr. De Vere said.

“I know all you want to do is help Laurent. The thing is I felt as if you wanted me to spy on him and I don’t really feel comfortable doing that,” he said. “It’s not honest.” Mr. De Vere stayed quite. Eyes on Damen, who in turn kept steady eyes on him. “I’m a stranger to your family. A grateful one at that, since I never dreamt of being in a home so beautiful and to graduate high school from a private school,” Damen said. “But, I value my honesty. Therefore what I am more than ready to do is to talk to Laurent and maybe convince him into being more open with you. Maybe mend some bridges that have been severed for whatever reason,” Damen said. “But I do promise,” he said, placing his right hand over his heart. “That if I do see any self damaging behavior I will inform you.”

Mr. De Vere nodded slowly. He seemed to be seeing Damen with new eyes, as if seeing him for the first time. “Of course, Damianos,” Mr. De Vere said. “That was truly all I ever asked for. Someone looking out for my nephew. That’s all I ever wanted,” he said.

“Of course sir,” Damen said with a nod of his own. That was not what he had asked but Damen wasn’t going to argue.

“Have you bedded him?” Mr. De Vere asked. 

Damen stared at him. He gave himself a moment. Damen hadn’t expected this. “That question makes me uncomfortable,” Damen said. “But the answer is, no, I have not.”

“Why does the question make you uncomfortable?” Mr. De Vere asked. 

“My sexual activity has never been something any foster parent has ever asked me about,” Damen said. He left it at that. 

Mr. De Vere seemed to take the hint. He took a step away from Damen and gave him what appeared to be a sincere smile. “I apologize my boy for making you feel uncomfortable.” 

“I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding,” Damen said with a smile.

“Indeed,” Mr. De Vere said. After a moment, they entered the home. “Well, you and Laurent have a pleasant rest to your day,” he said. “Text me and let me know when you two leave and what car you took,” he said.

Damen nodded. “Of course, sir,” he said as respectfully as he could. He climbed up the stairs slowly and made his way to Laurent’s room. 

He found Laurent waiting for him. He tried to act like he hadn’t been, but Damen could tell. Damen closed the door behind him. He fought the urge to embrace Laurent. They walked to one another and stood close.

“What he want?” Laurent asked.

Damen looked into Laurent’s blue eyes. “He asked me if I was still gonna spy on you for him,” Damen said.

Laurent nodded. He looked away. “What you say?” He asked. Damen stood there looking at him. He wanted Laurent to look into his eyes so he could see his sincerity, but Laurent wouldn’t meet his gaze. That was fine with Damen, he would just wait till Laurent looked at him. He finally did after a while.

“I told him the proposition had bothered me,” Damen said looking straight into Laurent’s eyes. “I told him it didn’t feel honest. I said I could try to talk to you into maybe opening up more but that was all I was willing to do. I also told him if I ever saw you display and self harming behavior I’d tell him, to make him feel as if I was on his side somehow,” Damen said to Laurent.

“Do you not trust my uncle?” Laurent asked curiously. When had this happened? Laurent wondered.

Damen took a moment as if really weighing the answer. He looked into Laurent’s eyes. He couldn’t lie to Lauren. “I don’t truly trust anyone in this home,” Damen said slowly and carefully. “But I do trust you more than I trust him,” Damen said. He was being honest.

Laurent nodded. He wasn’t hurt by what Damen said. On the contrary, he appreciated his honesty. “That’s totally fair,” Laurent said and he absolutely meant it. He and Damen looked into each other’s eyes and a small wave of understanding passed over them.

“I’m gonna shower and dress, we’re going out,” Damen said.

Laurent nodded. “Right,” he said. “I’m gonna shower too,” he said. 

“Ok, see you in a few,” Damen said softly. Laurent nodded and before he lost his nerve, Damen leaned in and gave Laurent a peck on the lips. Laurent was too shocked to say or do anything. Damen gave him a wide and walked out of Laurent’s bedroom.


	15. XV

After they had dressed they departed in a black Mercedes. As promised, Damen texted Mr. De Vere to let him know they had left and what car they had taken. Laurent drove and they got whatever Damen said he needed for school. Laurent got a few things himself. Once that was done Laurent led Damen to a book store.

“What do you enjoy reading?” Damen asked.

“Anything,” Laurent said. “Horror, psychological thrillers, poetry, Shakespeare...” he drifted off as he picked up a book and looked at it. Damen looked at him. He then looked away.

“I was wondering if you could do me a favor,” Damen said softly. He had been thinking about this the moment they had left Laurent’s home.

Laurent looked up, interest piqued. “What?” He asked.

Damen’s heart was thumping in his chest. “I.. I was wondering if we could go visit the last home I was at,” Damen said. “The home before I came to your home.”

Laurent held his gaze. It wasn’t hard or cruel, if anything Damen thought Laurent looked... Damen didn’t know. He wanted to say, Laurent looked concerned but he wasn’t sure.

“Your home,” Laurent said. He didn’t look away. “Not the gilded cage you’re in now.”

“Laurent, I -“

“No, you were just being honest. That’s you. You’re just honest. You say what you feel. You speak your truth. Never apologize for that,” he said.

Damen stayed still. Laurent’s gaze was again on the books on the display table in front of him. “Will there be food?” Laurent asked.

“Food?”

“Yeah I’m getting hungry. Will there be food or should we bring food? Well, I should bring something regardless, it’s impolite to visit someone’s home without a gift.”

Damen grinned. “She really loves flowers,” he said.

* * *

Damen had called Miss Daisy and he told her she didn’t need to cook anything. That he would bring food. Her home was about 45 minutes away. Laurent had made the choice of what restaurant to get food from and then had stopped at a grocery story and had gotten Miss Daisy three different bouquets. Damen’s heart warmed over this. They were now less than 10 minutes away from Miss Daisy’s home.

“So this is where you’ll be coming the day after you turn 18?” Laurent asked.

Damen stared at him. He had not told Laurent this. He had told Auguste. “Did Auguste -“

“No, I was awake when you two were talking I heard everything,” he said as if it was nothing. “That’ll be a couple of weeks before your graduation. It’ll be an hour drive to school unless you plan to graduate elsewhere,” Laurent said as if they were discussing the weather.

“I haven’t thought it through,” Damen said truthfully. Laurent had been awake. He had hear Auguste tell Damen that Laurent liked him. He hadalso heard when Auguste told Damen he could tell he liked Laurent too.

“Clearly,” Laurent said. “May be worth staying caged till the end of the school year. It’ll just be another week or two at most. Once June starts the exams will too and then you can come back here.”

Damen pointed to the driveway. He felt a sudden rush of happiness as he saw the small home. Miss Daisy’s home was small and quaint and... perfect. She came out of the front door and Damen stepped out.

“Oh, my sweet boy!” She said as she walked to them and wrapped her arms around Damen. Damen hugged her back. She stepped back and wiped tears from her cheeks. “Hello young man,” she said looking towards Laurent.

Damen looked at Laurent as he grabbed the flowers from the backseat. Damen thought Laurent looked a little... nervous?

“Hello, Miss Daisy, my name is Laurent De Vere. I’m a friend of Damen’s,” he said. “It’s wonderful to meet you,” he said handing her the flowers.

“Oh, thank you! How lovely,” she said and patten Laurent on the cheek, absentmindedly. Laurent froze for a second but then seemed ok. He smiled at Miss Daisy. It looked genuine. Damen walked to the trunk and got the food out, and Miss Daisy, smelling the flowers Laurent had given her, led then inside.

* * *

They had eaten and chatted and Damen liked how Laurent had relaxed. He had smiled and laughed as Miss Daisy talked about the nosy neighbor she had and about the new lady at church. Damen was pleasantly surprised at how Laurent listened and asked questions. Laurent seemed like a different person.

“I paid the boy down the street to mow my lawn this past Saturday,” she told Damen.

“Oh, you could have called me!” Damen said.

“And you would have been at the Hamptons taking care of me,” Laurent said rolling his eyes. 

“Oh, what happened?” Miss Daisy asked Laurent.

“I smacked my face into a jet ski,” Laurent told her as he pointed to the yellowish green bruise on his forehead. “I would have drown if Damen hadn’t jumped in and saved me,” he said softly and seriously.

Damen felt himself blush. “Not entirely true, he had a life vest,” Damen said.

“Oh, no! I’m glad you’re alright,” Miss Daisy told Laurent.

There was more easy conversation and Damen saw a side of Laurent he hadn’t quite seen. He was articulate and charming and witty and quite funny. There was no iciness or venom in his voice. He charmed Miss Daisy easily and he looked incredibly handsome, as he sat, relaxed on the floral loveseat of Miss Daisy’s small living room. Damen sat on the floral arm chair and just watched as they talked. He felt a lovely warmth flood over him. He had the silly feeling that he imagine one would when their parent loved their new significant other.

I’ve lost my ever loving mind, Damen thought as he felt himself blush thinking these thoughts. Laurent suddenly caught his eye and his lip curled into a small smile. Damen couldn’t have been happier.

* * *

“No wonder you hate my house so much,” Laurent said as they drove back to the De Vere home. “Miss Daisy is very loving,” he said.

“I don’t hate your house,” Damen said.

“It’s ok,” Laurent said. “Sometimes I hate it too.”

Damen stayed quiet. “I’m sorry,” he said.

“Don’t be, its fine. I have fond memories of it as well,” he said. “It’s a love hate relationship.”

They rode in silence for a moment while Damen thought of how to best say what was in his mind. “So you heard the whole conversation your brother and I had that night?” Damen asked.

“Yeah,” Laurent answered nonchalantly.

Of course Laurent wasn’t going to make this easy, Damen thought. He was going to make Damen open up and ask direct questions. Damen nodded. “Your brother said you liked me,” he said.

“He also said you liked me,” Laurent answered.

They weren’t looking at one another. Laurent was looking straight ahead and Damen looked out the window. “Do you?” Damen asked.

“Do _you_?” Laurent asked back.

Damen chuckled and shook his head. “You’re impossible,” Damen said. He finally glanced at Laurent, who, surprisingly, was smiling. “Thank you,” Damen said. Laurent gave Damen a quick look of surprised. “Thank you for taking me to see her, I -“

“Don’t,” Laurent said, as if being thanked made him uncomfortable. “I owed you one. Owe you several. She’s nice. I wouldn’t mind taking you again,” he said. “Every weekend if you wanted,” he said with a shrug. He said it as if it was nothing, but Damen knew Laurent meant it and had enjoyed his time at Miss Daisy’s home too.

* * *

Upon returning to the De Vere home, Laurent and Damen had changed and had gone swimming. They had stopped to go inside for dinner. Laurent had then insisted they go to the music room. It had large windows and Damen had never been there at night. Laurent played several songs in the violin and Damen clapped after the end of each one. After maybe an hour or so of playing Laurent put his violin away. They slowly made their way to their bedrooms.

Damen was outside of his when Laurent turned to him. “When you’ve changed, come over,” he said, again, not quite asking.

“Ok,” Damen said nodding. “I’m just gonna shower,” he said. 

Laurent nodded. “Yeah, I will too.”

“Ok,” Damen said. He gathered what he needed for the shower and tried not to think about going into Laurent’s room. This was fine, he thought. Maybe if he was there the whole night then Laurent wouldn’t have a single nightmare. This was fine. If they kissed it was fine. No big deal. They had kissed before. It was ok. He took a shower and changed and walked to Laurent’s room. He stood at the door. Should he knock?

He tapped it lightly with his fingertips as he opened the door. “I’m... come in,” Laurent said. Damen walked in and shut then door gently behind him. The room was almost dark. Laurent had a lamp on by his side of the bed. The light was warm and golden and it made Laurent look... soft. Sweet. Innocent. Yet Damen had seen him be the completely opposite of those things but at that moment.. that’s all Laurent was. He couldn’t wrap his head around it. 

Damen had sleep shorts on. Nothing more. Laurent was standing by his bed, in shorts and a tank top and Damen noticed four pillows. “I got you pillows,” Laurent said.

Damen nodded. “Thank you,” he replied. Laurent looked.. as if he wasn’t quite sure what to do. It, surprisingly, came off as sweet and innocent to Damen and just added to the confusion. Damen just couldn’t figure him out. Damen walked to the side of the bed opposite Laurent. “Shall we...” he said motioning to the bed.

“Yeah,” Laurent said.

They slid under the covers and sat. Damen couldn’t help but smile. He liked being this close to Laurent. Laurent pulled his tank top off and threw it to the bottom of the bed. He turned to Damen, his left hand pressing down on his pillows. Damen turned to him as well and waited. 

Laurent seemed to be... trying to make up his mind. Damen wasn’t sure what was going on inside his head. But he would be patient.

“I sleep a lot better when you’re close by,” Laurent finally said.

Damen smiled wider. “Good. That makes me happy.”

Laurent nodded. He was quiet a moment, again, seemed to be thinking of what to do or say. “So, when you kiss me... I really like the warm feeling,” he said softly.

“Me too,” Damen said. They looked at each other and Damen saw how Laurent looked at his lips. “I know I said all at your pace but I’d like you to know I’d like to always kiss you,” Damen said softly.

“Always?” Laurent asked.

“Yes. Anytime you want to, I will always want to.”

Laurent seem to smile, which made Damen happy. “Ok,” Laurent said. “You can now.”

Damen slid closer. He watched Laurent close his eyes. Damen really liked that but... he looked at Laurent and all his beautiful, pale skin. “May I kiss your shoulder?” Damen asked. Laurent opened his eyes and furrowed his brow. “Your shoulder to your neck and then to your lips?” He asked. Laurent sat still a moment, deciding, and then nodded. His breaths were shallow.

Damen moved slowly. He leaned in and kissed his right shoulder very, very softly. He heard the soft gasp. Damen looked up. Their faces mere inches apart. “Is that ok?” He asked. He could see Laurent’s pulse racing. After a few seconds he nodded. 

Damen leaned down again and kissed his shoulder gently. He was very soft and very slow. Damen took his time and he enjoyed it. When he was close to Laurent’s neck, Damen rubbed the tip of his nose up and down the side of it. He did this slowly too. Damen heard the soft moan. He was careful to not crowd Laurent. He wanted him to feel comfortable with it. He slowly started to kiss up the side of his neck.

“Yes,” Laurent said, softly, so close to Damien’s ear. Damen felt his arousal happening and pulled away quickly. “What’s wrong?” Laurent asked.

“Nothing, god nothing, nothing,” he said. He shifted a bit uncomfortably.

“Oh,” Laurent said, suddenly understanding.

“I’m sorry -“

“No,” Laurent said, with a soft laugh.

Incredibly hearing Laurent laugh only made Damen harder. He shifted uncomfortably again and Laurent shoulders shook with soft laughter. Damen noticed how even on the soft light he could see the reddened skin where he has kissed. That was such a turn on, Damen suddenly thought. “You’re enjoying this?” Damen asked and felt relieved Laurent wasn’t upset. He still didn’t know how Laurent would react to anything.

“Maybe,” Laurent answered with a shrug. Laurent looked at Damen’s face. His handsome face. When Damen kissed him, his mind was quiet. The look on Laurent’s face changed and his eyes looked more intense. Damen felt the mood shift. “Take your shorts off. Come here,” Laurent said softly.

Damen looked at him for a moment, as if he didn’t believe Laurent. 

“Damianos,” Laurent said with authority, and Damen loved the way Laurent said his name. “Take your shorts off and come here,” he repeated, when he saw Damen didn’t move.

Damen slid his shorts off, and he noticed the way Laurent stared at his erection, a bit wide eyed, and Damen again wondered if Laurent was a virgin. He then slid in closer, closer than he had been before. He turned his body towards Laurent. Damen wasn’t sure what to do. “What would you like me to do?” He asked. 

“Kiss my neck and shoulder like you were,” Laurent said. “But don’t touch me.” Damen nodded.

He leaned forward and kissed Laurent’s left side of his neck now. Slow. Soft. He felt as Laurent placed his hand on his stomach. Laurent closed his eyes. This was Damen, Laurent told himself. He looked down Damen’s body. His tanned skin. His hand looked so pale on Damen’s abdomen. He felt Damen’s lips on his neck. This was Damen. He was safe with Damen. Laurent slid his hand down Damen’s body, wrapping it around his erection. Damen was large. He heard Damen’s moan close to his ear. Laurent’s liked that, hearing Damen’s moans. 

He ran his thumb over Damen’s slit, spreading the wetness round his head. He began stroking him, every so often spreading the wetness around his head. Laurent twisted his hand halfway down, he paid attention to Damen’s breathing, his moans, the way his body reacted. It was quick. Damen came quite quickly. 

“Holy fuck,” Damen said collapsing on the bed. Damen had never had anyone get him off so quickly. He looked as Laurent got up and grabbed a towel. He brought it to Damen, so he could clean himself off. It was obvious to Damen that Laurent had done this before. “That was...” he trailed off.

“Adequate?” Laurent asked.

“Amazing,” Damen said. He wished to reciprocate. He sat up in bed. “I can -“ 

“No,” Laurent said. Damen nodded. He wasn’t going to push it. “Not yet,” Laurent whispered, not meeting Damen’s eyes.

“Ok,” Damen said, nodding. He laid back down on the bed. Laurent tossed the towels side and sat beside him on the bed. He looked at up Laurent. He laid still when Laurent placed his hand on his chest and slowly caressed him.

“Thank you though,” Laurent said.

Without thinking, Damen placed his hand on top of Laurent’s. Laurent froze for a moment but left his hand there. He laid down on his side. Damen was still on his back. “I’m here,” Damen said. 

Laurent smiled. It was the most perfect thing Damen could have said. “Good night Damianos,” Laurent whispered. 

“Good night my Prince De Vere,” Damen said softly.

Laurent hadn’t turned the light off but it was ok. It was a gentle light and he watched Damen’s profile as Damen smiled and closed his eyes. Laurent wasn’t sure why Damen brought him such peace. While he had touched Damen he had only thought of Damen and had only thought of the moment they were sharing. Laurent wasn’t sure how long he stared at Damen but he soon became aware of how heavy Damen’s hand felt.

Laurent slipped his hand out. It was warm and sweaty and... smelled of Damen. He got up and walked to the bathroom and washed his hand. He felt... ok. He had liked it. He didn’t look at himself in the mirror though. He walked back to his bedroom and turned off the light. He climbed in beside Damen and quickly fell into a dreamless sleep.


	16. XVI

Laurent was a light sleeper. He was awake and he blinked his eyes and wondered what had awaken him. He heard the owl hoot on the large oak close to his window. He looked at his phone, 2:27 am. He still had 4 hours of sleep. He turned and was met with Damen’s face.

Laurent was shocked, he had sort of forgotten Damen was there. He had felt so at peace and he usually only felt this peaceful alone. On his own. He looked at Damen. He looked so young. He looked so soft and peaceful. Laurent felt a sudden wash of warmth and it scared him slightly. It was scary but he liked feeling this way so much. The owl hooted, loudly, and Damen stirred. Laurent froze. 

Damen furrowed his brow and blinked. Another hoot. “Fuck sakes,” Damen said and Laurent chuckled softly.

Damen blinked and looked his way. “Hey,” Damen said sleepily rubbing his eyes.

“It woke me up too,” Laurent said.

Damen stretched and groaned. Laurent liked how he groaned. Laurent reached and placed his palm on Damen’s chest as he stretched. Damen glanced his way and gave him a sweet smile.

“I like how you do that,” Damen said. 

Laurent didn’t say anything back. ‘Why are you so sweet?’ Laurent wanted to ask. ‘Why are you so decent? Why are you so handsome? Why do you make me feel things? Why do you make me want to keep feeling them?’

Laurent thought back to how Damen had wanted to touch him earlier. It had been scary then. Now... it didn’t seem like such a bad idea.

_Hooooot_

“Damn owl,” Damen whispered closing his eyes. “And I was having such a nice dream.”

“Of?”

Damen’s eyes opened. “You.”

Laurent stared at him. Damen could just be saying this to initiate physical contact. Laurent didn’t care. He wanted it too. “What were we doing?” 

Damen looked his way. “I...” he trailed off.

“Yes?” Laurent asked. He had a bit of authority in the voice.

Damen found he couldn’t quite disobey when he heard Laurent speak that way. “I was pleasing you,” Damen whispered.

“How?” Laurent asked. 

“With my mouth,” Damen whispered again. 

The words lit a fire in Laurent. He wanted to try it. He wanted to see if Damen could truly please him. “Ok,” Laurent said. 

Damen suddenly looked very awake. Laurent didn’t want to be touched more than needed. He had to undress, so he pushed up to his knees and slid his boxers off. He saw how Damen looked down at his body. Laurent hated when people looked at him with lust. He loathed it. 

He remember the fencing tournament last year out of state, when he had pulled his head cover off and his blond hair had spilled out and one of the boys from the other school had said how he would love to grab it as he fucked him. Laurent hadn’t reacted or shown that he had heard the comment, but later, as they were about to leave, Laurent had found him, alone, and had pushed him against the wall, twisting his arm behind him and slamming his face into the wall with his free hand.

“You disgusting pig,” Laurent had said. “As if I’d ever let someone as filthy as you fuck me!”

Laurent had seen him a month later and he hadn’t had the nerve to meet Laurent’s eyes.

Laurent looked at Damen now... it pleasantly surprised him that he enjoyed how Damen looked at him. Laurent laid back down on the bed, on top of the covers. He felt his heart rate pick up. Damen got up, he was still undressed as well. Laurent almost couldn’t believe this. Damen was so good looking. He knelt by Laurent and Laurent felt himself open his legs up to grant him access. Damen slowly slid closer. Suddenly, Laurent raised his right leg and placed his foot on Damen’s chest, the ball of his foot pressing on his sternum. Damen stopped. Laurent stared at him. Could he really trust him? Damen stayed still, sensing Laurent’s hesitation.

“We don’t have to,” Damen said softly, sitting down. They stayed like this for a while. “It’s truly up to you,” Damen said. “I’m happy whatever you want to do,” Damen whispered and Laurent believed him.

‘I want to,’ Laurent thought and lowered his foot.He watched as Damen came closer to him. Laurent watched intently. 

“May I kiss your stomach?” Damen asked. Laurent nodded. Laurent made sure he was composed on the outside. He watched as Damen lowered his head. He felt his soft lips to his skin. And then...

Damen heard the soft moan and the ragged breaths as he softly kissed along Laurent’s abdomen. He did this a moment just enjoying it and enjoying how Laurent sounded. After a while, Damen worked his way down and licked Laurent from the base of his erection to the tip. He slid Laurent in as deep as he could inside his mouth. He sucked gently. Laurent wasn’t making any nose and Damen looked up and saw Laurent had his eyes closed, his fists clenched. Damen wasn’t sure if Laurent was enjoying it. Damen slipped him out of his mouth and sat back. Laurent opened his eyes.

“Does it feel good?” Damen asked. Laurent only stared at him. “Do you like it? I can stop.” 

“No,” Laurent said. “Make me come.”

“I want to,” Damen said. “Badly.”

Laurent nodded as if giving him permission to continue.

Damen lowered himself between Laurent’s legs. He had such beautiful thighs, Damen thought as he kissed the inside of one and took Laurent in his mouth again. He sucked him a bit harder this time and he slid his hands under Laurent’s hips, squeezing and caressing the soft skin. He felt Laurent tense and Damen was pleased. He sucked a bit more eagerly. He moaned on Laurent’s cock. He took hold of his hips. He worked his tongue around, sliding him in and out. And... nothing. Nothing happened. Damen looked up again. He released Laurent. 

“Laurent,” Damen said softly. He wasn’t sure what he was doing wrong. He wanted to ask.

Laurent sat up. “It’s fine,” he said after a moment and made to reach for his boxers.

Damen grabbed his wrist. “Tell me how I can please you. Tell me how you find pleasure.” Laurent just stared at Damen. It suddenly dawned on Damen, Laurent didn’t know. Again... Damen didn’t understand. Laurent had pleased him so effortlessly yet, he had no idea how to please himself. 

“What if we start slow?” Damen asked. “Slower?” He softened his grip around Laurent’s wrist.

Laurent sat very still for a moment. “How?” He asked softly.

“We can start with what we know you like,” Damen said. They sat still until Laurent nodded. Damen went and rearranged their pillows. He leaned back against the headboard. He held a hand out to Laurent.

Laurent looked at him. He felt his heart race. He went to Damen. He wanted this. He wanted to be a normal 16 year old and just have this. He took his hand and climbed on top. Damen looked up at him and smoothed the hair behind his ears. “Don’t think,” Damen said as Laurent sank into him. “Just feel.”

Laurent closed his eyes as Damen very softly kissed across his collarbone and up his neck. He let himself just feel Damen’s lips. They were slow. So slow. So soft. So good. He lifted his chin and Damen ever so gently licked and sucked the skin under his jaw and Laurent’s hips involuntarily moved and his erection rubbed on Damen’s abdomen. Laurent gasped softly. 

‘Don’t think.’ Laurent heard Damen’s voice in his head, and be didn’t. He didn’t think. Damen’s lips roamed around his neck. He felt the wetness he was leaving on Damen’s abdomen. It felt good. It all felt good. Damen began to grow hard as Laurent rocked his hips on him. He loved Laurent’s soft skin. Damen saw the slower and softer he kissed and sucked the stronger the effect it had on Laurent. This time, he could truly feel him getting closer to climax. Damen gently placed his hands on Laurent’s hips. Laurent’s hip movements we barely noticeable. 

There was another soft gasp as Damen just barely grazed the side of Laurent’s neck with his teeth and then Damen placed his hand on Laurent’s cock. The skin was hot and soft as silk. There was a gentle thrust, and Laurent felt the warmth of being between Damen’s palm and abdomen. It felt so good. He looked down and saw Damen was hard and weeping. Laurent wrapped his hand around Damen’s hard on. He started stroking him quickly. 

Damen moaned and Laurent leaned into him. Damen’s other hand caressed down Laurent’s ass cheek and he grabbed and both he and Laurent came. Together. Their joint released was hot and spurted between them, landing mostly on Damen and just a bit on Laurent as well.

Damen felt Laurent pick up his hand and move it off him and Damen respected that, he removed his other hand off Laurent as well. Damen laid back, panting. Laurent was off him rather quickly. Damen had wished to hold him and kiss him, but he let Laurent do as he wished. He saw the closet light turn on. Damen squinted against it.

“Here,” he heard and saw Laurent holding a towel. Damen wiped himself off with it. Laurent then took it back and then the light was off. 

Damen watched, by the moonlight as Laurent fixed his pillows. Damen was still panting slightly. He fixed his pillows too thought and then watched as Laurent laid back down on the bed. Damen slid down and laid on his side, facing Laurent.

He heard Laurent let out a sigh. He felt Laurent’s hand on his chest and Damen placed his own hand on top. “Did it please you?” Damen asked.

Something stirred in Laurent as he heard the softness in Damen’s voice. “Yes,” he replied.

Laurent slid close to Damen. Close but not touching except for the hand to Damen’s chest. Damen watched Laurent for a while and he finally closed his eyes once he saw that Laurent had fallen sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m on tumblr
> 
> [StarFromPhoenix](https://starfromphoenix.tumblr.com)


	17. XVII

“Damen.”

Damen stirred.

“Damen.”

Damen blinked. “What?”

“You have to get up and eat. We have to go to school.”

Damen sat up. The early morning sun was shining into the bedroom. He saw Laurent dressed in gray slacks and a gray pullover. White button up shirt underneath and a tie. The sleeves were up to his elbows exposing his fit forearms. He was leaning against his desk eating a bowl of fruit. Damen noticed the tray beside him. Bacon and eggs and fruit.

“When I’m going to school I normally take breakfast in my room. I told... Eloise to bring yours and mine to my room when she asked me what I wanted this morning.”

Damen nodded. “Thank you,” he said. He suddenly felt very hungry. He ate and then showered and dressed. Laurent walked into Damen’s room as he was putting on his tie. Damen pulled on a navy blue pullover, picked his backpack and they walked out.

Damen saw Mrs. Paschal at the front entrance as they walked down the stairs. He hadn’t seen her since the first day he had come to the De Vere home.

“Damen I was able to get you a schedule,” she said handing Damen the piece of paper.

“Thank you,” he said.

“Have a good first day,” she said and walked off.

Damen saw Laurent look over his schedule. “We have chemistry together this semester and PE next semester,” Laurent told him.

Damen glanced at him. Their faces were close. Laurent didn’t make eye contact and then he started walking off. Damen followed after him.

The ride was completely quiet, except for the music Laurent played and Damen wondered if he had done something wrong.

“Are you upset with me?” Damen asked.

“Should I be?” Laurent asked back.

Damen sighed and shook his head, looking out the window. “It was a simple question.”

“And you received a simple answer.”

Damen glanced at Laurent. Cool blue eyes stared back at him. “Are you going to act as if nothing happened?”

“I’m not going to loose my head over it,” Laurent said furrowing his brow.

Damen didn’t know what to think. “So it meant nothing?”

“You’re planning your escape from my home, you would leave tomorrow if you could. What’s your plan? Ask my uncle permission to date me?”

“What the hell is your problem?” Damen asked suddenly angry.

He saw Laurent roll his eyes. “Just shut up about it. Wasn’t it simpler when we weren’t talking about it?” They were at a red light. Laurent stared right at him. “Or are you happy where this conversation is going?”

Damen looked away. He felt conflicted. What had he expected? Really? Laurent only took and never gave. But that wasn’t really true. Laurent had given first and hadn’t asked Damen for anything in return. Damen was the one that said he had had that dream... which he had been having, he wasn’t lying about it.

The light turned green and Laurent took off and Damen said nothing else the remainder of the ride.

* * *

Once at school, Damen stayed a few paces behind Laurent. He watched as everyone greeted Laurent. He was very popular, Damen saw. He ignored it.

“Hey buddy,” Damen heard. It was Nikandros.

“Hey,” Damen said smiling.

“What’s your first period?”

“AP Biology,” Damen answered looking at his schedule.

“Oh mine too! Come on!” As they began to walk, Nikandros looked at Damen’s schedule and told him they had third period together as well. He pointed to the room numbers and explained to Damen where everything was.

Laurent watched them as they walked past him and up the stairs. He half expected Damen to look back and look for him, but Damen didn’t.

* * *

Damen found out the school had two lunches. He and Nikandros had the same lunch. Nikandros introduced Damen to his friends and he was welcomed warmly. As they sat and talked and ate in the cafeteria, Damen scanned the crowd. He knew he was looking for him. He wasn’t there though.

Third period was English with Nikandros. Damen really liked him. The more they talked the more they found out they had so much in common. It put Damen at ease.

He walked to Chemistry and he remembered Laurent saying they had it together. When Damen walked in, the class was half full and all the lab tables had someone in them. Damen walked in and his eyes drifted to a boy sitting by himself. He had honey colored curly hair and as he looked up Damen saw his pretty green eyes. He saw Damen and his eyes widened slightly. He seemed to blush. Damen quite liked the reaction. He went to his table.

“Is this seat taken?” He asked.

“No,” the boy said, blushing an even deeper pink.

Damen sat beside him. “I’m -“

“I know who you are, Damen,” the boy said, not meeting Damen’s eyes. “The whole school knows who you are,” he said.

“They do? Why?” Damen asked.

“Well, you pulled up with Laurent De Vere,” he said. “Half the school is wondering if you’re boyfriends. Then everyone saw you at lunch with Nikandros who’s the most popular guy in school.”

Damen nodded. “So I’m guilty by association,” he said looking at the boy. “What’s your name?” Damen asked.

“Erasmus,” the boy answered softly.

“Erasmus, nice to meet you,” Damen said. Erasmus just blushed. Damen couldn’t help but smile. He glanced around the class and then a lady walked in, who Damen assumed was the teacher. Behind her strolled in Laurent.

“Hey Laurent,” Damen heard a few times as Laurent walked through the classroom. Laurent gave a smile as an after thought in acknowledgment of whoever was greeting him. Damen watched as he walked towards him and sat beside him.

“Erasmus, how are you?” Laurent said sounding bored and dropping his book bag between his legs as he sat on the lab stool.

“I’m good thank you, Laurent, how are you? How was your summer?”

“Interesting.” Laurent looked up and Damen suddenly noticed he had been staring. Their gazes locked and Laurent leaned forward slightly, so as to see Erasmus better. “How’s your mother?” He asked.

Damen furrowed his brow and looked at Erasmus. “She’s had a good couple of months. She’s at home,” Erasmus told Laurent. “Thank you, you’re an angel,” Erasmus said looking at Laurent warmly and Damen was surprised at what Erasmus had said.

Class started soon after and their conversations stopped. They had to take all their lab equipment out, make sure it was clean and in working order. Damen tried to ignore Laurent putting his hair up.

Someone had to take inventory and Laurent said he would. Damen tried not to stare at his beautiful, long fingers. He remembered how they had wrapped around his -

“Damianos,” Laurent’s voice broke through his thought.

“What?” Damen asked.

“How many medium and how many small beakers?”

“Five each,” Damen said.

He watches as Laurent wrote that down with perfect handwriting.

* * *

“Bye,” Erasmus told Damen, blushing slightly as their gazes met.

“Bye,” Damen said smiling at him. He watched him as he walked out and then turned and looked at Laurent, waiting for him to gather this things.

Finally, Laurent was ready and they walked out.

“Erasmus couldn’t keep his eyes off you,” Laurent told Damen. “Not surprised,” he continued. “You’re his type.”

“His type?” Damen asked.

“Tall, dark, handsome, muscular.”

“Is that how you would describe me?” Damen asked Laurent.

Laurent rolled his eyes. Damen noted he didn’t say no.

“Damen!” It was Nikandros. He was coming down the hallway with some more of his friends trailing behind him. “Come on, first day tradition, we’re going down to The Habit. Best burger place in the world.”

Damen laughed as Nikandros dragged him along. He looked back at Laurent.

“See you at home,” Laurent said.

“Oh, you can come too!” Nikandros said to Laurent as an after thought. Damen glanced between them. It seemed the only person that didn’t fall under Laurent’s spell was Nikandros. 

“It sounds so tempting, but I’m gonna take a rain check bro,” Laurent said with a wide and friendly smile that Damen saw right through. He turned and walked off without a look back.

* * *

Laurent got into his car and took off for home. He was stopped at the red light right down the street from the school when he looked across the intersection and saw a familiar figure at the bus stop. He turned right and then U turned so he could go to the bus stop.

He opened the passenger window. “Erasmus! Come on, I’ll drive you home!”

Erasmus smiled sweetly and jumped into the passenger side. Laurent took off. He knew his way to Erasmus’s place.

“Where’s your car?” Laurent asked.

“Oh, um, I need to replace the radiator,” Erasmus said.

Laurent nodded. “Do you have the money or no?” He asked.

“Laurent, you do so much for me already.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Laurent said stopping at another red light and glancing at Erasmus. “If you don’t tell me I’ll buy you a new car,” Laurent said.

Erasmus gasped. “My father will have the money next week, when he’s paid!”

“In the meantime? How are you getting around?” Laurent said.

Erasmus blushed. “By bus.”

Laurent shook his head. “I’ll give you a check.”

“Laurent. No. You’ve done so much,” he said.

“I have the money, Erasmus,” Laurent said. “Please, let me help you.”

Erasmus sighed. “Thank you,” he said.

Laurent smiled and nodded. Laurent had met Erasmus the summer before he was to start high school. His uncle, had tired of him and had then taken to mentally tormenting Laurent. The particular summer day they had met, his uncle had been particularly vicious.

“You’ve got a pretty face but you’re spoiled goods now,” his uncle had said. “What man would want you after they find out what you did at 13?”

Laurent had decided he was running away. He packed a bag and jumped on his bicycle and had left. He was sure his uncle had seen him and Laurent was sure his uncle probably wished he succeeded.

Laurent hadn’t thought this through though. The bag was heavy on his back and the early July sun had scorched his delicate skin. He had pulled into a gas station, thrown his bike and backpack on the ground, had sat on the curb and had began to cry. Laurent had always known that had been his lowest point. That day had been the only day he had ever cried.

“You ok?” Came a soft voice.

Laurent wanted to be left alone. “Go away!” He had said without looking up.

Laurent felt someone sit beside him. It was a boy. He looked younger than Laurent. “My dad gave me $1.25 for an icee. You can have it. Icees always make me feel better.”

Laurent had stared at him. Laurent had $300 in his pocket. “He gave you $1.25?”

“Yeah,” the boy said.

“But don’t you want an icee?”

“I do,” the boy said. “But you’re so sad.”

Laurent looked across at Erasmus now. Laurent didn’t truly make friends. He kept people at bay. Erasmus was different. Erasmus had never asked Laurent why he was crying. Laurent had bought his own icee and had gone home with Erasmus and had dinner with his family. His mother had applied aloe on his skin. Her hands were really soft. Laurent remember how sweet she was and for the first time in his life had missed having a mother. She had then wiped Laurent’s face clean.

It was obvious they didn’t have much money but they offered Laurent all they could. After dinner Erasmus’s dad convinced him to call someone. He had called Auguste, who was at the Hamptons celebrating the Fourth of July. Auguste has then spoken to Erasmus’s dad and Laurent stayed for two days. Auguste had come to pick him up on the weekend. In talking, Laurent had found out Erasmus was actually a year older than Laurent. Laurent told Auguste he wanted him to go to his school and Auguste had told his parents he would pay Erasmus tuition.

Late last year when Erasmus mom had fallen ill, Laurent had told Auguste and had made sure her hospital bill was covered. Erasmus, to this day had never asked Laurent why he had cried that day, or why he sometimes didn’t want to talk and just sat with him in silence. When Laurent was angry and felt like breaking stuff, Erasmus never lectured him or seemed scared. Erasmus just let him be. He was like Damen in that way. They would just be there and not force Laurent to be anything he wasn’t.

They pulled into the driveway and Laurent got out. He didn’t feel like being alone. He walked inside the home and made his wayto the master bedroom to see Erasmus’ mom and she held his hand a moment. Laurent sat and talked to her. He stopped when he saw she looked tired. Erasmus grabbed a coupe of juice boxes and they made their way to Erasmus’ small room. Laurent was very comfortable here.

“So how was your summer? You were gone all summer.”

“Yeah. It was nice. My mom hadn’t seen her sister in a while and she moved to Jersey. So we were there. It was ok,” Erasmus said sitting beside Laurent. He handed him a juice box.

Laurent took it and put the straw in. “You like Damen,” he said softly.

Erasmus glanced at him. “You don’t?”

Laurent shrugged. “I don’t care.”

Erasmus never pushed Laurent to talk. They glanced at each other. “It’s ok if you like him, you know,” Erasmus said in his soft voice.

Erasmus didn’t say anything else and they stayed quiet a while. Laurent told him how his uncle was fostering Damen and then told him how Damen had gotten him out of the water.

“You two would actually be really good together,” Laurent said, speaking his mind. He hardly did this but he always tried to be honest with Erasmus. “You two would be one of those overly sweet couples that everyone would feel nauseous over but would secretly be jealous of. You’re both that type of person.”

“Hmm, well, with the way he was looking at you in Chemistry I don’t think I’m the one he’s interested in,” Erasmus said.

Laurent changed the subject then, and they chatted for a long while. Erasmus’ dad came home and was happy to see Laurent. He asked if he would be staying for dinner but Laurent said no he had homework. Erasmus walked him out.

“What shop is your car in?” Laurent asked Erasmus.

“Oh, Laurent,” Erasmus said. “You’ve done enough.” Laurent stared at him. “It’s at Rick’s.”

“I’ll drive by now. I’ll have him call you when it’s ready. Be ready by eight tomorrow morning. I’ll come by and pick you up.”

“Thank you,” Erasmus said.

“You know, I’m kind of jealous,” Laurent said in a playful tone. Erasmus furrowed his brow and looked at Laurent. “You’ve known me years and never had a crush on me, you meet that brute and it’s love at first sight.”

Erasmus laughed. “It wasn’t love at first sight. I know nothing about him. Plus, you can’t blame me for just checking him out, I mean, he looks so much like Nikandros and since Nikandros will never pay attention to me...” he said trailing off and rolling his eyes.

“You say that but how many times have you ever tried to talk to Nikandros?” Laurent asked. Erasmus blushed and shook his head. Laurent smiled. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Ok. I’ll be ready. Bye!” Erasmus said.

Laurent got into his car and waved as he backed out.

He drove to Rick’s and spoke to Rick himself and paid the repairs for Erasmus’ car and then made his way home.


	18. XVIII

Damen had a lot of fun. Nikandros was just great. They laughed and laughed and his friends were funny. After a few hours, Nikandros told Damen he would drive him home.

“So, the De Veres, man,” Nikandros said as he started up his truck. The radio turned on. Love Fool by the Cardigans began to play. “You know Auguste is like a sports legend at Collins Prep,” Nikandros said with a grin. “Dude is like a fucking all American god. He was a quarter back and a pitcher. He had an arm. Fuck.”

Damen grinned. He was impressed too. The same things impressed them both.

“So,” Nikandros said. “Laurent?” Damen felt himself blush. “It’s not terribly obvious,” Nik said patting his shoulder. “But I can tell bro.”

Damen sighed. “He’s so complicated though,” he said softly.

Nikandros nodded. “Man, I’ve seen Laurent get into fights and say the most vicious things.” Damen nodded. “And it blows my mind how he’s best friend with Erasmus of all people!”

Damen looked at Nikandros shocked. “Erasmus? Honey hair?”

“Pretty green eyes,” Nikandros said smiling. “He’s such a sweetheart,” Nik said.

Damen stared. “You like him bro?”

Nikandros was the one suddenly blushing. “Don’t matter. He... I don’t think I’m his type.”

Damen remember what Laurent had said. Tall, dark, handsome, muscular. That was Nikandros. Just today several people had commented how they looked alike. Just how Nikandros’s hair was more brown but everything else was similar. Their skin color and build. “You don’t know. Have you tried talking to him?”

“He looks scared of me,” Nikandros said.

“Maybe he’s shy because he likes you too!” Damen said. Then thought to what Nik had said. “They’re best friends?”

“Yeah,” Nik said. “Auguste knows but Mr. De Vere doesn’t. Erasmus is poor. He got a scholarship into the school. If he knew they were friends he wouldn’t let Laurent be friends with him. But we all know.”

Damen frowned. “But I’m fucking poor dude.”

“Yeah but you make him look good,” Nik said. 

Damen looked out at the road. He didn’t know that side of Mr. De Vere.

They reached the De Vere home and turned into the long drive way. “Hey tomorrow come to my place after school. Maybe we can practice some wrestling sets together?”

Damen grinned. “Yeah! That would be fun!”

“Ok. Later bro!” They fist bumped.

“Later!” Damen said and jumped out of Nik’s truck. He waved at him as he reversed and then walked inside the house. 

He jogged up the stairs. He passed his room and went into Laurent’s room.

Laurent seemed to be in the middle of changing. He was pulling on some dark green joggers as Damen walked in. He looked at Damen and furrowed his brow. “Rude much? I could have been naked.”

“I’ve seen you naked,” Damen said cooly as he dropped his school bag and took off his shoes. Damen pulled off his navy blue pull over and loosened his tie. Laurent shook out a gray tee shirt and pulled it on. Damen closed the space between them. As soon as the shirt was over Laurent’s head Damen kissed him.

Damen was ready for a punch. A shove. Yelling. Nothing came. Laurent ran his hands through his blond hair. He stared up at Damen. Damen felt his heart pound. He leaned down and kissed him again, keeping his lips on Laurent’s longer and this time he felt Laurent’s arms wrap around his neck and he wrapped his around Laurent’s waist. They kissed for a moment.

They pulled apart. Damen liked how red Laurent’s lips looked. He liked how his pale skin showed, without a doubt, that he had been kissed. Damen grinned.

“We’re not boyfriends,” Laurent said.

“Did I ask you to be my boyfriend?” Damen asked.

Laurent scowled. “Well every time we jerk off we don’t need to talk about it.”

“Ok,” Damen said nodding. “From now on every time I please you and or you please me, we won’t talk about it.”

Laurent rolled his eyes and put his hair up. Damen grinned and looked away. Laurent hadn’t said no. He hadn’t said no. “I do have one request though,” Damen said in an aloof voice.

Laurent turned and stared at him. “Hmm?”

Damen sat at the edge of Laurent’s bed. “That you don’t go off kissing or jerking off anyone else,” he said.

Laurent laughed. “Seriously? Damianos have you forgotten what you and -“

“No. No, I’ve not. And I promise I won’t with anyone else,” Damen said, his eyes wide with sincerity. Laurent believed him.

Laurent stood there and looked at Damen. He wanted them to be boyfriends without the title. This wasn’t weird and Laurent knew. But... making promises and commitments... Laurent shook his head and crossed his arms. “I don’t even know why we’re having this conversation. A couple of hand jobs and half a blow job and you wanna claim me like a prize or something.”

Damen nodded. “You are, Laurent,” he said and Laurent felt himself blush and he knew Damen notice. He didn’t ridicule Laurent thought and he didn’t comment about it. “Anyone who is lucky enough to have you in their lives should treat you like a prize, with respect and adoration.”

Laurent couldn’t quite handle this. “Stop!” He said. Damen stopped talking. “Thank you. Ok. Thanks.”

Damen nodded. “Why didn’t you tell me Erasmus was your best friend?”

Laurent shrugged. “I didn’t know I had to tell you stuff like that. Who’s your best friend?” He asked walking over and getting on his bed. He leaned back against his headboard. He bent his left leg and Damen looked at him. He pictured Laurent’s beautiful thighs, bare.

“I don’t have a best friend,” Damen said honestly. “I’m never really anywhere long enough to make long lasting friendship like that.” Damen wondered if maybe he and Nikandros would be best friends by the end of the year.

Laurent stared at Damen, surprised at his honesty. Laurent knew if that was him, we would never say that for fear of ridicule or pity or whatever. But Damen wasn’t looking at Laurent’s eyes. Damen was looking at his leg. He watched as Damen scooted closer and laid down, placing his cheek on his left inner thigh.

Laurent’s heart started pounding. This was too much touching. Too much closeness. Damen gave him that smile. That sweet adoring smile.

Laurent pulled back and Damen sat up. Laurent’s heart was pounding fast. “Laurent?” Damen said.

“I need space,” Laurent said harshly.

“Ok,” Damen said and he saw how uncomfortable Laurent was. He scooted back to the edge of the bed. Damen got off the bed and walked to Laurent’s desk and sat there. He felt awful. He felt like such an idiot. He stared at Laurent, knees drawn and his forehead on his knees. He looked small. They sat there for a while. A long while. Over an hour easily. The sun shifted and late afternoon shadows began to appear.

Laurent finally let out a breath and released his knees. Damen spoke first. “I’m sorry.”

Laurent stayed quiet and then nodded. Damen got up. “Where are you going?” Laurent asked.

“Just wanted to change out of my uniform,” Damen answered. Laurent nodded and got up and followed Damen to his room. He laid on Damen’s bed and watched in a not so obvious way as Damen changed. When Damen was done he went and sat at his own desk chair, giving Laurent space.

“Does Erasmus like anyone at school?” Damen asked.

Laurent furrowed his brow. “Why? Do you like him?”

“I like him in a friendly manner only. He seems very sweet,” Damon said looking into Laurent’s eyes. “I think Nikandros might like him.”

Laurent sat up and grinned. “You know this for sure?” He asked.

“Maybe,” Damen said.

Laurent chuckled. “This is perfect.”

“Does Erasmus like him?” Damen asked.

Laurent stared at Damen. “Can you keep a secret from your bro?” Laurent asked.

Damen thought about it. “Depends, but I’d rather not.”

Laurent nodded. He admired and appreciated Damen’s honestly. “We can’t say anything about what either has said to us, then,” Laurent said. “It wouldn’t be fair.”

“Ok,” Damen nodded in agreement.

“Oh we’re picking Erasmus up tomorrow on our way to school. His car is in the shop,” Laurent said. 

Damen’s eyes widened. “Which means he’ll need a ride home?”

“Yes,” Laurent said.

“Nikandros invited me to his place tomorrow after school to practice wrestling,” Damen said grinning. “If I tell Nik I want you to come he’ll say yes.”

“And if I go, Erasmus has to come because I’m his ride,” Laurent said grinning. He laughed. “Ok,” Laurent said. “Let’s do that. Whatever happens, happens.”

Damen laughed. He gazed at Laurent’s face. At this moment he looked happy. He wanted to remember this look.

* * *

Damen spent the night with Laurent again. There was a single kiss goodnight and they kept their clothes on. Damen was more than ok with this. He knew earlier he had pushed a bit too hard and he swore to himself to be more careful.

The next morning, Laurent woke Damen again. He was already immaculately dressed. Damen showered and ate and dressed and then they left to pick up Erasmus.

Erasmus climbed into the backseat and Damen greeted him warmly. They chatted as they drove to school.

To Damen’s happy surprised, Nikandros walked over after they had parked as they exited the car.

“Hey bro!” He said as he greeted Damen with a fist bump.

“Hey!” Damen said, happy smile on his face.

“Laurent,” Nik said. Laurent did his small smile and nod. “Erasmus, how are you?” Nikandros asked softly.

“I’m very good, thank you,” Erasmus said. His cheeks pink. He was looking at the floor. Laurent was beside him now.

“So are we still on for today after school?” Damen asked.

“Yes!” Nik said. “I’m pumped.”

“What are you guys doing?” Laurent asked.

“Oh, well, finally I have found someone who’s like exactly my size that I can practice wrestling with,” Nik said. “So I invited Damen over so we can practice.”

“Oh!” Laurent said. “Can I come watch?” He asked with a smile on his face.

Nik looked surprised. “You wanna watch?”

“Well, Damen said he wrestled so I’m curious to see how good he is,” Laurent said. “Oh, Erasmus will come too. I’m his ride home so.” Laurent shrugged.

Nikandros stood up a bit taller. “I’d love for you both to come over,” he said smiling at Erasmus.

“Wow,” Erasmus said, his green eyes even larger than usual. “That sounds like fun.”

“Ok. Well I know you all have Chemistry last period, so I’ll be by,” Nik said.

Laurent nodded and watched as Nik and Damen walked off.

“Oh my god!” Erasmus said.

Laurent grinned. “You better talk to him!” Laurent said.

“Did you and Damen planned this?” Erasmus asked.

“No,” Laurent said. “No Nik invited him and I know you kinda like him so I thought the opportunity was good.”

Erasmus smiled. He and Laurent started making their way inside. “It’s obvious you and Damen like each other,” Erasmus said. “You guys just gazed at one another the whole ride here.”

“Hmm,” Laurent said.

“I’ve never seen you like anyone,” Erasmus said.

“Because I never have,” Laurent said.

“First everything then?” Erasmus asked.

Laurent shrugged. “Almost,” he said.

Erasmus heard the sadness there. He would never push Laurent to talk but he wanted his friend to feel better. “Well, whatever. It isn’t the first person you do something with, it’s the last that counts if you ask me,” Erasmus said sighing. “Imagine finding your true love and kissing those lips forever.”

Laurent rolled his eyes. “You’re a hopeless romantic!” He said.

Erasmus nodded. “Well, now I see you are too because those lovey dovey eyes you and Damen make at each other are amazing!” He said.

Laurent didn’t want to smile but couldn’t help it. He liked what Erasmus has said. It wasn’t the first, but the last. He would make sure he remembered that.


	19. XIX

Laurent hadn’t truly cared much for wrestling. He fenced and Auguste had played football and baseball so he had never paid attention to wrestling. Now they were in Nik’s basement. Laurent and Erasmus watching as Nikandros and Damen... wrestled.

“I like the outfit,” Laurent whispered. He could tell Erasmus these things.

“Me too,” Erasmus said.

“Guess we’ll be going to the wrestling tournaments this year?” Laurent asked.

“Yes,” Erasmus whispered back.

Damen and Nik took a break. Nik came over and grinned at Erasmus. “I hope we’re not boring you.”

“No,” Erasmus said with wide eyes.

“I remember last year you mentioned you liked roses, pink roses,” Nik said.

“Yeah,” Erasmus said, blushing.

“My mom loves them too. She has a bunch in the garden. Come on, I’ll show you.”

And just like that Erasmus and Nik went off and Damen and Laurent were left alone. “Well that was quick,” Laurent said. He looked at Damen.

Damen laughed. He kept a few feet between them and Laurent knew it was because of yesterday. He was feeling less anxious now and wished to close the distance. Laurent looked at the sweat at his hairline and biceps.

“You’re better than him,” Laurent said.

Damen looked at him. “Am I?”

“Yes. You move more fluidly,” Laurent said. “Why didn’t you beat him?”

Damen looked at Laurent for a couple of seconds. “I want to see all he can do. What he’s capable of.”

“What if he caught you unaware and had suddenly beat you?”

“Nah,” Damen said. “I’m better than him.”

Laurent grinned and he reached and caressed Damen’s bicep. Damen smiled. “Kiss me,” Laurent said softly.

Damen stepped to him and kissed him on the forehead. Laurent furrowed his brow. Damen smiled his sweet smile and kissed Laurent on the cheek. Then the other cheek. Finally, a soft kiss on the lips. “I’m gonna go shower. Nik has a shower down here. I’ll be right back.”

* * *

Once Damen had showered and changed, he and Laurent went upstairs to Nik’s living room. Erasmus and him walked in about half and hour later and then Nik showered and changed. They ordered pizza and put on Netflix.

“Have you guys watched Birdbox?” Nik asked. Erasmus had but Damen and Laurent hadn’t. “Cause you’ve been too busy looking at nothing but each other,” he said jokingly. He put it on.

Laurent noticed how Erasmus leaned into Nik, who put his arm around him. That’s how it should be, Laurent thought. That easy. He glanced at Damen who had his right arm leaning on the arm rest and his left along the back of the couch. The doorbell rang.

“Pizza!” Nik said and they all got up. They all ate around the kitchen counter and once they were done they started making their way back to the living room.

Laurent quickly made his way to the half bathroom downstairs. As he washed his hands he looked at himself in the mirror. “It’s easy,” he told himself. It’s easy. If he wanted to just be close it was easy. He just had to relax. Not think and relax.

Laurent walked back and Nik restarted the movie. He had his arm around Erasmus and Erasmus has his hand on Nik’s thigh. Easy, Laurent thought. It looked so easy. Damen had resumed his previous sitting position. Right arm on the arm rest, left arm across the back of the couch, legs splayed.

Laurent made his way over and plopped down on the couch, effortlessly right up against Damen. He didn’t make eye contact, because, why should he, really? He felt Damen tense for a few seconds but then relaxed. They kept watching the film, which was quite good and by the end of it, Damen had his arm around Laurent. It felt ok. It wasn’t suffocating. Maybe it was because Laurent had been engrossed in the film.

* * *

Laurent had his journal and was writing in it. He was writing the same sentence in different styles of writing. “Don’t think. It’s easy.” He was trying to convince himself. It got darker and Laurent turned the light on. “Don’t think. It’s easy.”

It had been a couple of days since the afternoon at Nik’s. He and Damen had just kissed a few times since. They had spent the nights together but again, fully dressed and nothing else had happened. “Don’t think. It’s easy.”

He heard his bedroom door open. He looked at his watch. “Oh shit,” Laurent said. He saw Damen walk in. He was wearing jeans and a black tee shirt. He was holding a tray of food.

“You didn’t come down to dinner,” he said. He walked forward and placed the tray on the night table beside Laurent. He sat on the bed, a foot of distance between them.

“I don’t think I’m hungry,” Laurent said.

“Ok,” Damen said. “Well, maybe in a moment you will be,” He said in a hushed tone.

Laurent looked over Damen. “Are you ok?” He asked.

Damen looked up and Laurent was surprised to see tears in his eyes. “Uh,” He said, shaking his head. “Tomorrow is the anniversary.”

Laurent understood. He put his journal down and crawled over to Damen and embraced him. Laurent wasn’t thinking of how this made him feel, he was just concerned about Damen. “I know how you feel,” he said. Damen knew it was true.

Damen fell into his arms with relief. He knew Laurent knew. It felt comforting to finally have someone who truly understood. “I miss him. You know?”

“I know,” Laurent said. He held Damen tighter. He closed his eyes as he wrapped his arms around him. Damen shifted, turning to face Laurent better and pulling him closer as well. His body felt so warm.

It was as if they couldn’t get close enough. Their lips met. Laurent leaned into Damen and Damen loved how pliant Laurent felt in his arms. He kissed down his neck, slowly like he knew Laurent liked it. “You’re so perfect,” Damen said softly.

Laurent froze. His heart was pounding. “I am not,” he said. I’m far from it, Laurent thought.

“Yes, you are,” Damen said. “Warm. Caring. Loving.”

Laurent let out a soft huff of breath as Damen pulled Laurent into his chest. Holding him tight. Laurent suddenly wondered when the last time was that he had been held. “I’m supposed to be the one doing the comforting and holding,” he whispered.

“But holding and comforting you makes me feel good,” Damen said. “You have a soft heart. A sensitive heart,” Damen continued.

Laurent stayed still. Every time Damen would give him a soft squeeze with his strong arms, Laurent would just sink further into him. “I...” Laurent began to say but forgot exactly what he wanted to say as he sunk into Damen’s chest.

“You do” he said. “And it’s a beautiful thing. And it’s ok. I know you have to put your walls up to keep others from hurting you. Maybe you have already been badly hurt,” he said. Laurent squeezed his eyes shut. “I just hope you will, maybe one day see, if you let them down for me, I would never hurt you.”

Why did he have to say these things? Laurent wondered. It seemed too much to take and his brain was telling him to get away but it felt good to be held so tightly. Laurent closed his eyes and sunk into Damen further. He wasn’t aware he was crying until his face was wet with tears. “It’s ok,” Damen said.

But I’m supposed to be comforting you, Laurent wanted to say, but he couldn’t quite get the words out. He kept feeling his tears fall and Damen just held him. It was comforting. It was tender and loving. He didn’t know how long it lasted but Laurent closed his eyes and wished to never move from where he was. 

* * *

Laurent woke up. Everything was dark and moonlight was pouring into his room. He was warm. Very warm. Damen still had him arms around him. He pried himself loose and Damen shifted and open his arms up.

“You ok?” He asked sleepily.

“Yeah. Go back to sleep,” Laurent said.

“Ok,” Damen replied, not opening his eyes and turning over. He grabbed a pillow and hugged it. Laurent smiled and removed the sweater he had an and went back to sleep as well.

* * *

The days passed. Nikandros and Erasmus lost no time in becoming the latest couple the whole school talked about. Nikandros was just as emotional as Damen and lived to show his affection. He would bring flowers for Erasmus at school and as they separated to go to their different classes he would yell, “I love you baby!” from one end of the school hallway to the other. Laurent and Erasmus had second lunch while Damen and Nikandros had first, so there was a break from the over nauseating romantic antics from Nikandros which Laurent was so happy about because he knew how much it meant to Erasmus. 

It had also become a bit of a habit for them to go out every Friday and Saturday night, usually after spending Saturday afternoons with Miss Daisy. Laurent saw how happy it made Damen and he enjoyed her company as well. Nikandros and Erasmus loved calling their outings: double dates. Laurent sometimes had his moments of doubt and panic. He wondered when Damen would tire of him being so slow at showing public affection. On their fifth ‘double date’ Laurent reached over and held Damen’s hand as they walked through the mall to the movie theater they were going to. Damen’s whole face lit up and Laurent rolled his eyes but had never felt happier.

At night, Laurent’s nightmares had stopped all together but they hadn’t done much more than before. Damen had tried once more to please Laurent with his mouth, but it hadn’t worked. Laurent could see the confusion in Damen’s eyes and Laurent had climbed on top of him and had put Damen’s hand on both of their erections and they had both orgasmed. That seemed to make Damen forget about Laurent’s inability to let go. They never talked about it the day after and Laurent was glad.

When homecoming came, they all went together in one Limo and needless to say the whole school focused on them four. The school named Nikandros and Erasmus homecoming Kings, which both Damen and Laurent were very happy about. A girl from their Chemistry class looked at Damen and Laurent. “I voted for you too!” She said.

Laurent shrugged. “He’s my king every day,” Damen said and had kissed Laurent sweetly on the cheek. Laurent had grinned.

November proved to be a busy month for all of them. Laurent was only a junior and had started fencing, but Erasmus, Nikandros and Damen, being seniors, started getting college applications ready. Apart from that, Damen and Nik wrestled and Erasmus was in the yearbook committee.

Laurent took it upon himself to help Damen with college applications. He even texted Auguste for tips. Laurent felt Damen, though, wasn’t taking the whole process very seriously.

“Damianos!” Laurent said. “Focus!” As he was helping him type up his applications.

“Why?!” Damen said angrily. It shocked Laurent. Damen’s anger was something he barely saw.

“Because having a good education is import-“

“You need money to have a good education!” Damen said angrily. “Which, hello, I don’t have enough for college!”

Laurent turned to face his laptop. “I do,” he said softly.

“Oh no. No. No. You’re not paying for my college!” Damen said.

Laurent turned to him angrily. “Why? You’re too good for it?!”

Damen’s eyes flashed with the same anger Laurent felt. “I’m not a fucking charity case!”

Laurent rolled his eyes. “Fuck sakes, Damianos. You always tell me trust you and let you in and open up and when I hold out a helping hand you act like you’re too high and mighty for it.”

Damen didn’t know what to say in return.

* * *

The week after thanksgiving was Nikandros’s 18th birthday. There was a huge party thrown that pretty much every junior and senior in their school attended. The weekend after, he and Erasmus drove to the Hamptons to celebrate Nik’s birthday by themselves.

That Sunday mid morning, Laurent was in Damen’s room, he was reading and he saw Damen had dozed off while reading. Laurent liked how Damen looked sleeping. He looked so handsome. His phone chimed. It was Erasmus.

**We did it**

Laurent stared.

_Wow. Congrats?_

**Lol. Omg it was... amazing. Can’t wait to tell you all about it**

Laurent texted him a thumbs up emoji and looked at Damen sleeping. Laurent felt... he didn’t want to deal with what he felt right at this moment... and right then he wished time would stop so he wouldn’t have to hear the details that he knew Erasmus would want to tell him.


	20. XX

The following Monday, Laurent and Erasmus were at lunch and Erasmus told Laurent about his weekend with Nikandros. He wasn’t explicit, he mostly spoke of how romantic Nikandros was and how wonderful everything had been. Laurent truly was happy for him.

“I’m happy you’re happy,” Laurent said.

“How are you and Damen?” Erasmus asked.

“Fine,” Laurent said.

“Have you thought about...”

Laurent shrugged. “I’m not ready,” Laurent said.

“Oh of course. You have to be ready,” Erasmus said and then they changed conversation topics.

* * *

Auguste came home the week after and Laurent felt happy. It was extra great that his uncle left two days after Auguste had arrived. Laurent didn’t ask Auguste about where their uncle was going or who he was seeing, he only asked Auguste how long he would be gone. December was off to a wonderful start with him gone, in his opinion.

“He’ll be back January 5th,” Auguste said. “I return to school on the 12th.”

Needless to say, Laurent was thrilled. The first Saturday Auguste was there, Laurent decided to put the plan he had into motion. He was sitting in bed and waiting for Damen to wake up. He finally awoke and Laurent saw him stir.

Laurent laid down, facing him, kissed him and pulled him close. He felt Damen’s hands caress up and down his back and saw him smile at the show of affection. “I have a favor to ask of you,” Laurent asked softly.

“Ok?” Damen said furrowing his brow slightly.

“I know on Saturdays we normally go see Miss Daisy together and then we go out with Erasmus and Nik,” Laurent said. He felt the nervousness creep up in him but he took a deep breath in and buried it. “I... I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind going to see Miss Daisy alone for lunch,” Laurent said.

“Oh,” Damen said looking confused. “Yeah. Sure,” he said.

“Then,” Laurent continued. “I want you to tell Nikandros we won’t be joining him and Erasmus for our double date. Tell him we have plans of our own,” Laurent said. “I’ll text Erasmus myself later.”

Damen stared at Laurent. “Ok,” he said. 

“I’ll be by at around 5,” Laurent said. “Well, I’ll call you when I’m on my way, and I’ll go in and say hi but then we’ll... we’ll have some time alone.” 

“If that’s what you want,” Damen said.

“It’s what I want,” Laurent answered. 

“Anything you want,” Damen said softly and pulled Laurent into him for a soft kiss.

* * *

Laurent knew Ada was with her parents and wouldn’t arrive until tomorrow. Today was the only time he and Auguste had alone, so it had to be today. The brothers were sitting across from each other having lunch. Laurent told Auguste that Damen had gone to see Miss Daisy and told him they normally went each Saturday. 

“You go with him?” Auguste asked surprised. 

“Yes,” Laurent answered as they ate lunch. “She’s a wonderful woman and Damen cares for her a great deal. We always have lunch with her on Saturdays.”

Auguste gave Laurent a smile and reached over and squeezed his hand. “Laurent,” Auguste said softly. “You love him don’t you?”

Laurent felt his heart pound. He looked into his brother’s eyes. Laurent wasn’t sure if he was in love or not but now was not the best time to ask. Laurent had other pressing matters at hand. “Auguste, I want you to be my legal guardian. Not uncle.”

Auguste looked shocked. “What? Why?”

Laurent squeezed his brother’s hand. “Uncle does not have my best interest in mind.”

Auguste let out a sigh. “Oh, little brother,” he said. “Listen, I can tell you, uncle loves you so very much.”

Laurent shook his head. He didn’t want to loose it. He couldn’t stand anyone defending that monster, but he had to keep his cool. “No.” He said firmly. He looked into Auguste’s eyes and Auguste looked at Laurent intently. Laurent knew his brother would pay attention to him. Something shifted behind Auguste’s eyes. Laurent could tell he was truly listening. “I don’t doubt that in his own demented way he does love me,” Laurent said softly. “But he does not have my best interest in mind.”

“How do you know?” Auguste asked.

“He’s shown me,” Laurent said. He opened his mouth to say the little speech he had prepared but was interrupted by his older brother’s question. One he hadn’t expected.

“Has he hurt you?”

Laurent felt a coldness spread through him. “What do you mean?” Laurent asked.

“Exactly what I asked,” Auguste said. He searched Laurent’s face. “Has he... done something?”

Laurent felt his eyes widen slightly and he looked away from his brother. Did he know? How could he? He couldn’t. He couldn’t know because if he knew he would have helped Laurent. He wouldn’t have just left him here to suffer. Laurent thought of how to best answer, but his silence seemed to be answer enough for Auguste.

“Oh god,” Auguste said. “Laurent. Laurent tell me!” Laurent swallowed. He felt frozen. He forced himself to calm his breathing. He was fighting the instinct to run. Run as far away as he could and hide. “Laurent,” Auguste said more softly. “If...” Laurent watched as Auguste eyes brimmed with tears. “You’re not the only one,” he said.

Laurent felt a sudden rush of anger and disgust surge through him. “He touched you too?!” He asked in utter disbelief. He hadn’t thought uncle would touch Auguste as he had been 15 when uncle had moved into their home with them.

Auguste’s hand flew to his mouth. He put it down and his tears fell. He got up from where he was sitting and came around the table, kneeling in front of Laurent and hugged him tightly. “No,” he said. “No, little brother he didn’t. But I think I know someone else who he did this too.”

Laurent sat there. The realization of the fact that Auguste now knew started to creep into him. It no longer was a secret. It was a fact. A reality. So much was going through Laurent’s head and yet he felt frozen. He forced himself to do something. Anything. To react. “You can’t tell anyone.” Laurent said.

Auguste looked at him. “But -“

“DON’T!” Laurent said angrily. Auguste froze. “Don’t pity me. Don’t...” Laurent didn’t know what to say. He shook his head.

“I.. I don’t pity you. I’m just... I should have -“

“DON’T!” Laurent yelled even louder. He couldn’t take it. He couldn’t take Auguste blaming himself. It would just be more pain. “You can’t tell anyone. Promise me you won’t tell anyone!” Laurent spoke softer.

Auguste knelt in front of him looking utterly devastated. Confused. Hurt. He looked like everything Laurent had felt those months and was trying to not feel ever again. “Little brother -“

“You wanna help me?!” Laurent asked angrily. He didn’t know why he was so angry with Auguste. He just was. This was not how this conversation was supposed to go. Laurent had to regain control of the situation. Auguste nodded and wiped his face. “You’re studying law at fucking Harvard! Become my legal guardian! Don’t worry about the rest! I’ll deal with it. Just become my legal guardian!”

Laurent’s voice was cold and scary as was the look on his face and Auguste could do nothing else but nod. “Yes, ok,” He said. He got up and went and sat down again. 

“Who else?” Laurent asked.

“Ah,” August said. He clenched his fists so they would stop shaking. “Nicaise,” He said.

Laurent stared at Auguste. “Nicaise?”

“Yeah,” Auguste said.

“Why do you think so?” Laurent asked.

“It was the weekend we went to New York and you got sick, remember?” Auguste asked. Laurent nodded. “So uncle was needing a new manager for the hotel here and he had interviews and remember Nicaises’s dad was fighting his mom for custody. He told uncle he needed the money. Uncle told him he could have the job and said he was going to send him to some seminar in New York that weekend and told him he could leave Nicaise with him since you and I were there. So he did and then you woke up sick and with a fever and uncle told me to get you Tylenol and called the front desk for a doctor to stay with you. So the doctor took forever and I went to go look for him. I went to his office because he wasn’t answering his phone and it was locked. I thought it was weird,” Auguste said and looked at Laurent.

Laurent felt his nails digging into his palm as he listened, fists clenched. “Ok?” He said.

“I left and went back to our room and the doctor got there and he left me a prescription. I went back up to uncle’s office so we could get it and I saw him talking to Nicaise and he,” Auguste shook his head. “He kissed him on the cheek and -“

“Enough!” Laurent said. He stood up.

“I’m sorry!”

“Don’t say that!”

Auguste shook his head. “What am I supposed to do!”

“I told you! Become my legal guardian!” Laurent said.

Auguste nodded. “Ok,” he said. “Ok, I will.”

Laurent looked at the time. 1:45 pm. “I’m gonna shower and go,” he said.

“Where are you going?” Auguste asked.

“I’m going on a date with Damen.”

“Does he know?” Auguste asked softly.

Laurent turned and looked at Auguste as if he was out of his mind. “Fuck no! And he never will! And nobody else ever will Auguste! Do you understand me?!”

Auguste nodded. “Yes brother,” he said. Laurent turned and walked out of the dining room and up the stairs to take a bath. It was the first time Auguste had ever just said brother and not called him little.

* * *

Laurent showered and dressed and about 30 minutes later he was ready to go. He knocked on Auguste’s bedroom door. 

“Come in!” He called. Laurent walked in. He had a black leather overnight bag and dropped it on the floor. “Going somewhere after your date?” Auguste asked.

“Yeah. We’re going to spend the night in a hotel.”

Auguste stared at Laurent. “You are?”

“Yeah. Isn’t that what 16 and 17 year olds do with their significant others? I mean uncle wouldn’t allow it because he’s an asshole but I didn’t think you would care,” Laurent said. He wasn’t sure why he was being so hostile with Auguste. But it felt good. 

Auguste stood frozen. “Ok,” he said. “Damen is a good guy.”

“Yeah. We’ll be back tomorrow. I’ll text you later. Don’t text me. Might kill the mood. You should go spend the night with Ada. Whatever guilt you’re feeling won’t change shit so just don’t fucking feel it. Alright?”

Auguste nodded. “Alright,” he said softly. 

Laurent clenched his fist. “Good,” he said. He grabbed his bag and walked out of Auguste’s room.

* * *

Nicaise’s home was a 15 minute drive from Laurent’s. He had attended Collins Prep Freshman year, he and Nicaise were the same age, but since last year he was being tutored at home. No one knew why. Laurent stopped in front of the gates of his home and pulled out his cell phone. He dialed Nicaise.

“Hello?”

“Hey it’s Laurent. Can I come in.”

“No.”

“Can you come to my car. I’m in front of your gates. I’m alone.”

“Why?”

“I just want to talk to you.”

Silence. “Fine.”

The gates opened and Laurent drove in. Nicaise’s father had indeed become the manager of the De Vere hotel in town, which he still managed to this day. Looking at the home he owned it was obvious uncle was paying him a lot of money. More than he should be making.

Laurent saw Nicaise standing outside his front door. Nicaise was a good looking boy. Pale skin and dark hair and striking hazel eyes. Uncle had told Laurent to keep his distance from him which, of course, made Laurent go out of his way to befriend him, but he had found himself actually liking him. He was a brat though and sometime was immature. They had been pretty friendly until spring break their freshman year. Nicaise had wanted Laurent to come to his home and spend it with him and Laurent had said he would if Erasmus could come which Nicaise wasn’t willing to do. So Laurent had told him he wouldn’t spend it with him at his home that he would spend with Erasmus instead. Nicaise had told Laurent off and they hadn’t spoken much since.

Laurent now watched as Nicaise walked towards Laurent’s car. Laurent quickly went to the camera in this iPhone and started recording a video and put it in the middle console. Nicaise got into the passenger seat. 

“Hey,” Laurent said.

“Don’t hey me. Why are you here?” Nicaise asked not looking Laurent in the face.

Laurent felt there was no point in lying. “Auguste told me something weird,” Laurent started. “About that weekend in New York when we were all there as kids -“

“I hate you. I hate your brother and I hate your fucking uncle,” Nicaise said.

Laurent nodded. “Why?”

“You know why,” Nicaise said. “Don’t you? I know Auguste saw when your disgusting uncle kissed me on the cheek and that mother fucker never -“

“Don’t talk about my brother that way!” Laurent said heatedly. He was fiercely protective of Auguste. “Whatever he saw, there was no way he knew it was anything more than weird. He was just a kid!” 

“So was I!” Nicaise said. Laurent froze a moment. So was I, Laurent thought to himself. He looked back at Nicaise, who shook his head and looked out the car. “I blocked it, in a weird way. My therapist said that your brain does it to help you deal. I actually wondered if I had imagined it.”

Laurent sat there and said nothing.

“The summer before sophomore year, my dad and I went to Colorado to visit family and I went out with my cousins. I got tipsy and started dancing and this cute guy was hitting on me. We dance then snuck away. It was my first time making out with anyone. He wanted to suck me off and I freaked,” Nicaise said. He looked at Laurent. “Your uncle raped me. I was only 12.”

Laurent wanted to say something but knew nothing would help Nicaise. “You’re in therapy?” He asked instead.

“Yeah,” he said. “But not just cause your uncle fucked me but because my father fucked me over too. When we made it home that summer, I told my dad and he confronted your uncle and your uncle bought us this house. I... through arguing with my dad I then found out your uncle paid my tuition to Collins Prep. When I found out I told him I wouldn’t set another foot in that school again. And then I thanked my father for letting me know exactly how much my innocence and virginity was worth in dollars and cents.”

Laurent nodded.

“Auguste must have told you, right?” Laurent just nodded. “If he did this to me I’m sure he’s done it to others,” Nicaise said.

“Do you know if he has?” Laurent asked.

“No, but I’m sure there is a money trail to show who’s children’s he’s fucked,” Nicaise said. “I’d start there.”

Laurent nodded again. “Why didn’t you go to the police?”

“Because he has my dad and by default me by the balls. If I squeal my father is unemployed and I’m sure your uncle can hire a lawyer that will ruin my father’s life and mine as well.”

Laurent knew this would be true. “Is therapy helping?” Laurent asked.

Nicaise shrugged. “Can’t you tell? Aren’t I so balanced emotionally and mentally?”

Laurent stared at him again. “You didn’t hesitate to tell me.”

“I always fantasized a De Vere brother would come. I just thought it would be Auguste actually since I knew he knew and I imagine him telling me he was sorry and to offer me money to stay silent.” Laurent stared at him. “That’s what you De Vere’s do. You buy compliance with your money. Then I’d take the pleasure of telling him what I thought of you all.”

“You can,” Laurent said. He meant it. “You can tell me.”

“Nah,” Nicaise said. “Maybe therapy is helping more than I thought. I... I don’t really hate you or your brother. I only hate him.” Laurent nodded.

Laurent wasn’t sure what more to say. He thought for a moment. “I hope therapy helps you reclaim your life fully,” Laurent said. The words felt strange as they left his mouth as it was the one wish he had always wished for himself.

Nicaise looked at him. “Easier said than done,” he said. “Hey,” he looked at Laurent. “Least if something happens to you your dad won’t be able to remind you that everything about you has a price.”

“I’m sorry about that,” Laurent said.

“Yeah,” Nicaise said. He opened the passenger door and walked out. Laurent watched him walk back inside his house.

He stopped the recording on his phone and cranked up his car and took off. He stopped at a gas station and listened to the whole conversation he and Nicaise had had. He then messaged it to Auguste. Laurent’s thumbs were over his phone as if he was going to text his brother but he wasn’t sure what to say so he just put his phone on his lap.

‘I hope therapy helps you reclaim your life.’ Laurent thought of what he had said. He sighed. He was going to be 17 in the year to come and he was sick of not being able to be a normal teenager and just... just be able to act as normal as the others in his school and be with Damen the way Erasmus was with Nikandros. 

He took a deep breath in. Auguste would figure it out. He had to. He didn’t want uncle to know he was going to pay for Damen’s college tuition, he may try to stop him and he couldn’t have that.

Auguste wouldn’t let him down. Laurent was sure. His brother always had his back. He pulled out his phone and sent him a message.

 _I’m sorry I was acting angry earlier. I didn’t mean it. You’re my only real family. You’re all I have._

Laurent took a deep breath. He cranked his car back up and took off.


	21. XXI

Laurent arrived at Miss Daisy’s an hour earlier than he expected and he never texted or called Damen. He parked in the driveway and leaned his forehead on the steering wheel. He breathed. His heart slowed and his mind felt clearer. Once he was ready, he got out of his car and went inside.

Miss Daisy was kind as always. Laurent didn’t look at Damen much. He listened as Miss Daisy talk. Her stove was acting funny, she said. It didn’t always turn on. There was a man at church who fixed appliances and she was hoping he could come see it.

“What? To fix it?” Laurent asked.

“Well yes,” she said.

Laurent felt a little out of it. He shook his head. He hated when he had moments like this. It had normally happened the days after his uncle had made him do things... he wanted to be very involved in normal life, to forget the previous day, but he didn’t feel quite there. Those were the days he normally picked a fight. Just to make him feel as if he was there and not floating away.

“No. No don’t do that,” Laurent said standing up. “Come on, we’ll go buy you a stove.”

Damen and Miss Daisy stared at Laurent.

“Laurent,” Damen said looking shocked.

“What?” Laurent asked. He turned to Miss Daisy. “You need a stove. Come on,” he said again. “Come on!” He said with a bit more authority and Damen and Miss Daisy got up and she went and grabbed her purse. They got into Laurent’s car and they took off.

“So... where do they sell stoves?” Laurent asked realizing he had no idea where to go.

Miss Daisy told him of a place. “I’ve never heard of them. Where is it? By the mall?”

“No,” Damen said. “They refurbish old -“

“Oh no. No. You need a new stove,” Laurent said. “Damen google it. Find an appliance store.”

Damen did and there was one very close and in they went. Miss Daisy looked around and didn’t look too sure. “I’m buying it. Pick anything you want. Early Christmas present from Damen and I,” Laurent said, beginning to feel more present.

As they walked around and the task of picking out a stove took over Laurent’s mind, he began to feel more normal. Better. It didn’t take too long. Miss Daisy pointed to a brand name she preferred and then they saw the models they had that would fit her home. She looked and a sales person came over and about 45 mins later they walked out of the store. The stove would be delivered Tuesday between 10 am and noon.

They left the store and Miss Daisy kept thanking Laurent. “Really, it’s no big deal,” Laurent said as they drove back to her home.

“You’re such a sweet boy,” she said.

Laurent gave her a smile and let out a breath. He felt better.

* * *

After getting back to Miss Daisy’s house. They stayed a moment longer. Laurent realized he hadn’t texted Erasmus so he stepped outside and called him instead.

“Hello?”

“Hello. It’s me,” Laurent said.

“Hi me,” Erasmus answered.

Laurent smiled. “Listen Damen and I are going to do our own thing tonight.”

“Yeah, Nik told me. All good. Enjoy!”

“I will,” Laurent said. “Bye.”

He hung up and Damen came out. “Ready to go?” He asked. Laurent took a look at him. He was in jeans and a black hoodie and jacket. The way the afternoon sun hit his wavy brown hair was really nice... he looked really good. 

“Yeah,” Laurent said and went back inside. He hugged Miss Daisy and told her they would be back next weekend. Damen hugged her too. She walked them out and waved to them as they backed out of her driveway.

They drove in silence for a moment. “That was very kind of you,” Damen said.

Laurent shrugged his shoulders. “A stove is essential,” he said.

Damen smiled and looked out the window. “So what did you have planned?” Damen asked.

“Just thought we could be alone together,” Laurent said.

Damen nodded and said nothing else. He was beginning to learn when and when not to engage Laurent in conversation. He stayed quiet. He watched the scenery as they drove on. He noticed they got on the freeway. He saw the sign to the De Vere hotel in the city over. Damen glanced at Laurent, but he was looking out on the road.

They got off the freeway and Damen saw they were driving towards the hotel. It had been visible from the freeway.

“Are you driving to your hotel?” Damen asked.

“Yes. My hotel,” Laurent said. He looked at Damen and smiled.

Damen smiled back. His heart began to pound. He knew what couples normally went to hotels for... but he and Laurent were not a typical anything.

They pulled up to the front and got out. The doorman recognized Laurent and called for the valet and another employee came over. Damen saw Laurent pull out a black leather overnight bag. “I got a change of clothes for you too,” he said as the employee took the bag from Laurent’s hand. “We’re only staying one night.”

“Ok,” Damen said.

They walked in and Laurent walked over to the front desk. Damen decided to hang back, mind racing. Laurent walked away from the desk and Damen followed him. They got into the elevator. They were alone.

“So,” Damen said. 

“So?” Laurent asked.

“This is a surprise,” Damen said with a smile.

Laurent looked over and gave him half a smile. “Is it?”

Damen breathed out. Of course Laurent was doing this. “Yes. It is. A good one. And we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” Damen said looking into Laurent’s eyes.

Laurent stared at him for a moment. “I know,” he said. The elevator dinged open and Laurent stepped out.

Damen followed Laurent down the hallway to where he stopped and opened up a room. Damen followed him inside.

The room opened up into a seating area with a large tv and fireplace. The windows were large and had a nice view of the city. There was a small kitchen and a nice little round table. As Damen walked towards the windows he glanced to his left and saw the large king size bed. His heart skipped a beat. He figured he had nothing to loose by being direct.

“So why are we here?” He asked Laurent.

“I told you, to have time alone together,” Laurent answered.

“We can spend time alone together in your room at home. Why are we here?” Damen made sure his voice was level and he didn’t sound nervous.

Laurent stood there and just looked at Damen, as if he himself wasn’t sure what he was doing. He thought he knew what he wanted but it was a lot more nerve wrecking than he expected. Damen walked over to him and reached for one of his hands. “I’m glad to be spending time with you though, it means a lot to me.”

Laurent let out a breath. Damen just always knew what to say. He always just... made Laurent want to open up and... Laurent shook his head.

Damen noticed. “What it is?”

Laurent closed his eyes. “You... make me feel so much,” he said softly. He let out a breath.

Damen smiled. He knew it wasn’t easy for Laurent to open up. “As long as it’s all good.”

Laurent nodded. He let out another breath and Damen watched him. Laurent seemed to be battling something internally. He finally looked at Damen. “Why do you think we’re here?” He asked.

“I...” Damen said shaking his head and feeling suddenly nervous. It all pointed to something but Damen didn’t want to assume.

“You want to don’t you?” Laurent asked. Damen searched his face but couldn’t make out any emotions. Laurent was hiding it all in a perfect unemotional facade.

“Um...” Damen shook his head again, out of nervousness really.

“You’re shaking your head no, does that mean you don’t want to?” Laurent asked.

Damen let our a breath. He did. But was that ok? He decides to be honest. “I do, but -“

“But what? You want to bend me over and fuck me,” Lauren said simply. “Say it.”

Damen felt his breath leave him. He searched Laurent’s face again. This felt surreal.

“I assume you are always the one doing the fucking aren’t you? Not the other way around?” Laurent asked. He didn’t sound hostile. He was doing that thing he did, where he was speaking of something important but made it sound as if they were discussing the weather.

Damen looked into his blue eyes. He didn’t see iciness but the look was guarded. It wasn’t open or loving and Damen was just trying to wrap his head around the words coming out of Laurent’s mouth.

“I... Yeah. I usually am, yeah.”

“And you want to fuck me. You’ve wanted to for a while.” Damen shook his head. “Oh, you don’t then?” Laurent asked and it was just too much for Damen. 

“Stop!” Damen said. “Stop, wait, let’s...” Damen took both of Laurent’s hands. “Let’s back up a moment, Laurent,” Damen said softly.

Laurent looked at Damen’s face. Laurent’s heart was racing and had been since he started talking. This wasn’t easy for Laurent and he wanted to keep everything under control. He looked at Damen now.

“Laurent what I want is to make love to you,” he said softly looking into Laurent’s eyes. “To please you. To make you feel good. This isn’t just about me, my pleasure will come from pleasing you.”

Laurent stared at him. He listened and didn’t know what to say.

“And yes, I’ve... I’ve fantasized about making love to you, me being on top, yes,” he said, hint of a smile on his lips. “I want to take pleasure in your body and in turn to please you with mine.”

“Ah,” Laurent said as his breath escaped him.

Damen took his face in his hands and kissed him softly. Laurent brought his hands up and held Damen’s wrists. Damen’s tongue caressed the inside of Laurent’s soft lips and mouth. Damen had now known Laurent for four months and at times it still felt as he did the first week he met him... like he didn’t really know him enough and he wanted to know Laurent better than anyone else.

They pulled apart and Damen laid his forehead on Laurent’s. “But this isn’t just about me,” Damen said. “Tell me what you want. What you would like.” He pulled back and looked down at Laurent. His cheeks were slightly flushed and lips red from where they had been kissing. “What did you think? That I was just gonna turn you over and mount you?” Damen asked with a half smile and he noticed how Laurent’s breath hitched and eyes darkened. He suddenly wondered if that’s what Laurent actually wanted. “And I can if you want,” he said.

Laurent pulled back and took off his jacket. So did Damen. They looked at one another as Laurent ran his hands through his blond hair. Damen’s stomach suddenly grumbled with hunger. “Shall we order room service?” Laurent asked. Damen nodded rubbing his stomach.

* * *

They had ordered room service and had changed into comfortable clothing. Jogging pants and long sleeved tee shirts. They started watching The Office as they ate in bed. It turned out the bedroom had an equally large flat screen as the one in the sitting area mounted on the wall. Damen grinned as he watched Laurent laugh at the show.

They felt relaxed and they had an easy conversation going, commenting on the show and other things, laughing and joking around. They were on their fifth episode when Damen’s phone began to ring. He got up to get it. It was Nik.

“Hello?”

“Hey!” Nik said. “Just checking in. I know you said you and Laurent were doing your own thing but I just wanted to make sure you were ok?”

Damen rolled his eyes but smiled. Nikandros had never said he disliked Laurent but he had never said he liked him either and was always checking in on Damen.

“He’s just not the most loving person is all,” Nik had said.

“I’m happy, Nik,” Damen had answered and Nikandros had just nodded.

Damen glanced at Laurent now, he had his eyes fixed on the screen of the tv. “Yeah,” Damen said. “Everything is perfect.”

“Alright. Talk to you tomorrow.”

“Ok,” Damen said and hung up. He walked back to the bed and sat beside Laurent.

“That was Nikandros,” Laurent said. Damen nodded. “Checking in to see that I hadn’t eaten your tender heart, I’m sure,” he said nonchalantly.

Damen glanced at him sideways. “Don’t mind him,” he said.

“He turns 18 and suddenly feels he must parent us,” Laurent said, but he didn’t sound mad or annoyed. He was saying it in jest. Damen grinned. “And what about when you turn 18?” Laurent asked glancing over at Damen.

“I’ll be staying until all of school is done, if I’m allowed to,” Damen said.

“It’s my home you will be,” Laurent said softly looking away. He watched the tv for a while and then glanced back at Damen. “And the summer you’ll spend with Miss Daisy?”

“Yes,” Damen said. “Mowing her lawn and hopefully seeing a lot of you.” Laurent had a small smile on his face. “I want to see you every day like I do now,” he continued.

“Do you?” Laurent asked. His tone was light. He liked to tease Damen really and Damen now knew when things were said playfully.

“Of course. I mean we’re...” Damen drifted off.

“We’re..?” Laurent said looking at him intently.

“Friends,” Damen said.

“Friends?” Laurent asked. “Is that what we are?”

“Well you won’t let me call you my boyfriend so not sure what else to say,” Damen said and he lifted a hand and softly grazed Laurent’s right cheek.

Laurent got up on his knees and leaned forward, pushing Damen back on the bed. He slid his right hand inside Damen’s sweater. His knees were on either side of Damen’s thighs, his left hand holding Damen’s shoulder down. Laurent’s breathing was normal but as Damen’s eyes wandered down his neck to his collar bone he saw his pulse racing beneath his delicate skin. He looked back up to Laurent’s eyes and saw how dark they were. They were intense. His beautiful golden hair was cascading around them.

Laurent’s stared into Damen’s eyes as he slid his hand down Damen’s body and into his pants. Damen was softly panting, his lips parted.

“Laurent,” he whispered as he felt Laurent’s fingers wrap around his erection. He had grown hard quite quickly after Laurent had pushed him down on the bed.

“Hmm?” Laurent asked as he stroked Damen.

Damen felt his hips lift into Laurent’s hand. It felt so good. His body always responded to every touch Laurent gave him. He tried not to think about this too much. About how intensely his body reacted to Laurent. He knew he wanted to let him slowly build up to whatever it was he wanted, but every time Laurent touched him, his body lost control.

Damen moaned and panted harder. His body tensing from head to toe. “Laurent,” He said again, breathing harder, his moans grew longer and then he closed his eyes and came. He opened his eyes as Laurent’s hand lazily stroked him a few more times, until he had emptied himself completely.

He saw the smug smile on Laurent’s face as he slid his hand out of Damen’s joggers. He began to lift up when Damen grabbed him by the wrist. Laurent stared into Damen’s eyes, who was still panting softly. “Kiss me,” he said.

Damen wanted it, needed it. He had never asked but after what had happened, he couldn’t help himself. Laurent shifted and leaned back into Damen, both hands on his chest. Their lips met and Laurent’s body presses down on Damen’s.

It had never felt quite like this. There was something different about this kiss... it felt hot and intense and needy. Damen couldn’t help himself and slid his hands inside Laurent’s top. They pulled apart, panting. They stared into each other’s eyes. Laurent sat up, straddling Damen and pulled his top off. He climbed off Damen, who sat up and pulled his top off as well. He then slid his pants off. Laurent sat back on his feet. They stared at one another.

“You want to -“ Laurent started.

“Make love to you,” Damen said cutting him off. “Please you. Make you feel good. Give you what you want.” Damen got on his knees and took Laurent’s face in his hands. “We can go as slow as you want and need. It doesn’t even have to be me inside of you, we can do anything we want.”

“So you’ll bottom?” Laurent asked.

Damen sat back on his feet. He had never. “You would be my first,” Damen said. “And if you took good care of me, yes, I would.”

Laurent stared at Damen and his surprise was evident. “Oh,” he said softly, as if he wasn’t expecting to hear that answer and didn’t know what to say.

Damen smiled and was happy he had surprised him. He wasn’t lying. He wanted to show Laurent they were equals. Laurent pointed to the over night bag. “What is it?” Damen asked.

“I brought condoms and lube,” Laurent said.

Damen’s heart began to race again. “Oh,” he said this time. He got up and went to the bag. He looked around and found the bag with what he needed inside and brought it to the bed. Laurent had laid back on the bed, leaning back on the pillows. He looked gorgeous, beautiful golden hair against his pale skin, eyes a deep blue. Damen looked him over. “You’re so gorgeous,” he said.

Damen saw the faint blush appear across Laurent’s cheeks and Damen felt as if time stopped as he went closer and laid himself on top. For once, Damen didn’t hold back. He let himself kiss and feel and touch Laurent how he had wanted to all these months. His hands roamed his soft, pale skin. He couldn’t stop touching and feeling and any last bit of worry left him when he felt Laurent wrapped his arms around his neck.

Damen reached down and began to push Laurent’s pants down, finally sitting up and pulling them off and tossing them to the side. He quickly resumed the kissing and touching. Then he placed gentle kisses along Laurent’s neck. He tried to be slow and gentle, just how he knew Laurent liked it. Laurent moaned softly and made the most beautiful sounds as Damen kissed across his chest. He licked and gently bit one nipple and Laurent’s skin reddened and his hips bucked forward. Damen needed Laurent.

He pushed himself up on his arms. “I...” he said. He looked down into Laurent’s blue eyes. They were dark and his skin flushed. His hands also roaming Damen’s body. “I need to be inside you,” he whispered. The words were heavy and deep with emotion.

Laurent looked at him for a moment. “Yes,” he said and turned over to his stomach in one perfectly practiced motion. Damen sat back and looked at Laurent’s perfect body. Laurent slid one knee up, spreading himself for Damen. Damen ran his hands up the back of Laurent’s thighs and leaned forward, kissing his back. He felt the slight trembling of Laurent. “Are you nervous?” Damen asked softly.

“No,” Laurent said in a sure voice. His voice didn’t match what Damen was seeing physically. Laurent was trembling as if he was scared.

Damen sat up and gently turned Laurent over. He leaned down again and began with slow and gentle neck kisses. Damen liked them as much as Laurent did. He felt Laurent relax slowly. His arms wrapped around Damen and then he felt his left leg wrap around him as well. Damen reached down and gently stroked him. Laurent closed his eyes and leaned his head back. Damen had never seen him like this. He was beautiful. He was vulnerable and open and Damen felt so privileged to be the one to be here with him.

Damen felt as Laurent handed him the bottle of lube. He poured some on his fingers and leaned into Laurent again. Damen administered soft and slow kisses and he moved his hand slowly to Laurent’s opening. Whatever experience Damen felt he had meant nothing. Right here, right now, Damen felt he was in unknown waters and he felt as nervous as if it was his first time. He had never felt this way about anyone. With everyone before it had just felt like fun, but this, here, with Laurent... he felt it touched deep inside him. He lifted up on his left arm and looked down at Laurent and watched his face as he slowly slid one finger in.

Laurent moaned and gasped. He was so tight. Damen couldn’t even breathe. He slowly slid his finger in and out. Laurent was soft gasps and moans and Damen couldn’t tear his eyes away. After a moment he added a second finger and Laurent opened his eyes a moment and looked at Damen. They kissed. Then Damen lifted up and again watched him as he slid two fingers in and out. Laurent was extremely hard. Damen slid down and took him in his mouth.

He sucked him for a moment and then slid him out. He softly kissed around his erection. He then kissed his election from the base up as softly and as slowly as he kissed Laurent’s neck. He now had three fingers in. He had kissed almost all the way up to the head when he felt Laurent’s hands grab his hair and pull. Damen lifted up. He looked at Laurent’s beautiful face.

“Damianos,” Laurent whispered.

“Yes?” Damen asked. His name sounded so beautiful coming out of Laurent’s lips.

“Yes,” Laurent said. “Now.”

Now.

Now.

Damen had ever heard a sweeter word.

He sat up and slid on a condom and lathered it with lube. He settled on top of Laurent.

“You’re sure?” He whispered looking into Laurent’s eyes and stroking his hair back.

“Yes,” Laurent said breathlessly. “I’m sure.”

Damen nodded and felt as Laurent wrapped his left leg around him, his heel on Damen’s lower back. Damen pushed his erection down and placed the tip right at Laurent’s entrance. They looked at one another as Damen pushed in slowly. Laurent then closed his eyes.

“I won’t hurt you,” Damen said and Laurent’s breath hitched in his throat. Damen leaned in and gently slid in. He slid out and then slid in, a bit deeper than last time. It felt incredible. Tight. Warm. He slid out and again, another gentle thrust. He slid out and this time, when he slid in, he was in all the way. Laurent moaned softly and threw his head back.

Damen stayed in a moment, letting Laurent’s body adjust. He leaned forward and again, gave Laurent soft and slow kisses that he knew he loved. When he began to move again, it was with care and tenderness. Damen let out a soft moan and wrapped his arms around Laurent, pulling him closer. They held on to one another as Damen moved between them. They were slow and deliberate thrusts, Damen wanted nothing more than to please Laurent.

It, surprisingly for both of them, didn’t take long. Laurent felt the mounting tension all over his body and Damen felt as his body began to tighten around him. It was becoming harder for Damen to stay fully in control. His needs and desires were clouding his mind.

“Laurent,” Damen moaned.

“Damianos,” Laurent answered, right into Damen’s ear. Damen then heard him gasp and he felt the delicious tightening of Laurent all around him as Laurent came. Damen couldn’t hold back, there were a few more thrusts, a bit harder and deeper and then he came as well.

They laid for a moment, basking in the peacefulness of the moment. Laurent began to stir and Damen gently slid out of Laurent and sat up, letting him get up, which he quickly did. Damen fell to his side, and saw Laurent return a moment later with a towel. Damen took off the condom and threw it into the waste basket nearby. He took the towel Laurent handed him to wipe himself clean.

“Were you thirsty?” Laurent asked. “There’s -“

“I’m fine. Come here,” Damen said, holding his hand out.

Laurent looked at him a moment, as if deciding, and then climbed back on the bed and took Damen’s hand. He sat beside him. Damen glanced over him. His skin was still red from where Damen’s lips and hands had been.

“I’d just really like to hold you,” Damen said.

Laurent looked surprised. He seemed to think about it and then nodded once and laid down, facing Damen. Damen pulled him close and kissed him gently.

“I’m the luckiest man alive,” Damen said and Laurent felt himself blush and was glad he had his face buried in Damen’s neck. Laurent slowly smiled. Damen always said the most perfect things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Damen x Laurent](https://starfromphoenix.tumblr.com/post/182282540122/damen-x-laurent)


	22. XXII

They hadn’t fallen sleep but had peacefully laid together for a while as the room began to darken. Laurent closed his eyes and thought back to how everything had felt. It had been good and intense and even more incredible than he could have thought.

“You ok?” Damen asked softly.

“Yes,” Laurent answered just as quietly. 

“Did it hurt?” Damen asked.

“No,” Laurent whispered. It hadn’t. Damen had kept his word to not hurt him. It had felt good. Laurent could still feel it.

They looked at one another. Laurent looked away because he was afraid that maybe this time his eyes would give too much away. He couldn’t quite compose himself at the moment. Then he wondered if maybe he didn’t have to. Maybe he could feel all this and let Damen see it. He glance his way again and found Damen still looking at him. He had a tender look in his eyes.

“Is that how you look at all your conquests?” Laurent asked in jest. Making a joke of it seemed a bit easier than anything else at the moment.

“No,” Damen whispered. “Far from it.” Damen sighed. “Just you.”

Laurent swallowed. Damen’s honestly surprised him so much at times. He wondered what that was like, to just put your feelings out there without the worry of who you were saying it to wouldn’t one day use them against you. To hurt you or belittle you or blackmail you with them... not be afraid to be hurt. What a thought. “You’re so honest,” Laurent said.

“I find it’s easier that way,” Damen said softly. He glanced back at Laurent.

Laurent stared into his eyes. “It’s not so easy for me,” he said. 

Damen reached over and caressed his cheek. “I know,” was all he said.

Laurent turned and kissed his neck. Laurent felt Damen freeze in surprise. Laurent bit his neck gently, sucking on his skin. Damen moaned. He began to run his hands over Laurent’s body as he had before. It felt so good to Laurent. His mind was quiet and this took over everything. It just felt good. He wanted more. He turned onto his stomach. He wasn’t nervous this time.

He felt Damen’s mouth on his back. He gasped and arched his lower back, spreading his legs for Damen. He heard Damen’s moan as he grabbed his ass and squeezed it. Laurent moaned at this too. He was hard again. He gasped in surprise when he felt Damen spread him and the felt his warm, wet tongue lick around his entrance. Laurent was not expecting that. He opened his eyes wide and he felt goosebumps all over his body as Damen’s tongue licked around his entrance, sliding just inside of it. 

Laurent felt Damen’s mouth close around him and as his tongue slid in deeper. Laurent groaned. He felt his hips lift off the bed, pushing Damen’s tongue deeper still. Laurent’s body felt hot. This was something he had never had before. He spread his legs wider and he pushed his chest and face into the mattress. Damen had a firm hold on him.

Laurent moaned and he felt he couldn’t quite control his body as Damen worked his tongue in and around the sensitive skin of Laurent’s entrance. He gasped and shut his eyes. Damen’s tongue was licking in and around. The warmth and pressure of it was incredible. Laurent groaned. Damen licked and kissed around his entrance hungrily as he pushed Laurent’s hips down, his erection rubbing down on the bed and Laurent groaned loudly at the friction. Damen was deliberate and in control but always with his underlying gentleness.

Laurent has never had this. Had never had moments where he lost himself in the pleasure that someone was giving him. Damen had tried, with his mouth before but Laurent was unable to let it happen. While Damen had been inside of him an hour ago, it had been close, but still, Damen was getting just as much pleasure while making love to him. Now, here, with this... this felt as if it was just for Laurent.

Laurent groaned again as Damen pressed his tongue in deeper. Laurent felt as if electricity shot through his body, his hands grabbing the sheets and his toes curling and his erection again rubbed into the mattress again. Laurent’s mind was hazy. All he was feeling was Damen’s tongue exploring inside of him and the next time he felt his tongue go deep, Laurent felt the explosion of pleasure spread through out him. Laurent felt Damen’s hand wrap around his erection. He moved his hips between Damen’s hand and tongue now. This was at his pleasure as well. Even with Damen’s other hand securely at his one hip, Laurent felt in total control of the speed at which his body was experiencing this ecstasy. Laurent’s breathing was labored and eyes squeezed shut, he could feel nothing else than Damen pleasing him. 

This went on as long as Laurent wanted it too. He went at his pace and Damen’s hand on his hip was like an anchor, keeping him grounded to the moment. Laurent went slow and then sped up at times, to experience how it felt, how it pleased him. He moaned and writhed and his body trembled in a different way than it had earlier. Damen noticed the difference. Finally, the delicious tension was a bit much and Laurent emptied himself in Damen’s hand. Damen loved the slight sounds Laurent made. Even as he came, Laurent restrained himself so Damen took pleasure in any soft moan or groan that he couldn’t hold back. Damen loved the way Laurent’s body shuddered as his hips softly moved, riding out his orgasm.

Laurent closed his eyes and panted, hair over his face, mouth parted. He was still on his knees. It was taking him a while to compose himself. He still felt he couldn’t move. He had felt Damen leave the bed. He was back again and gently turned Laurent over. Damen had turned the light on. Laurent blinked against it and became aware Damen was toweling him down. He looked up at him. 

“How was that?” Damen asked softly.

“Adequate,” Laurent whispered back and found himself grinning when Damen’s melodious laughter filled the room. Damen laid down beside him and held him and Laurent just closed his eyes and enjoyed the peacefulness he was feeling. After a moment his breathing calmed.

Then Damen was kissing him slowly along his shoulder, sliding on top of Laurent, smoothing his hair back. Laurent looked up at Damen’s perfectly handsome face. “May I make love to you again?” Damen asked. Laurent felt a thrilling clench to his stomach.

“You may,” he replied. 

Laurent closed his eyes as Damen’s mouth and hands roamed his body once more. He had never been touched so much. Damen though, had a way about him, despite his large size there was a softness to him that Laurent truly found unexpected in a such a lovely way. He never crowded him or made him feel caged. He also never made Laurent feel as an object or as if he wished to own or claim Laurent. Laurent now truly believed what he said: that his pleasure came from giving Laurent pleasure.

Damen kissed Laurent’s neck and then their lips met and Laurent opened his eyes and looked at Damen as he pulled away. Laurent could smell them both on him and Laurent wrapped his arms around his neck and pulled him closer, wanting to taste and smell again. The intimacy he was feeling with Damen right then was intoxicating. At this moment in time, Laurent wasn’t thinking about what it meant to throw himself into this. At this moment in time this was his reality and he was embracing it.

Damen sat back on his feet and grabbed another condom. Laurent watched, panting, as Damen slid the condom on and lathered himself with lube. He then took hold of Laurent’s hips and slid in.

“Ah,” Laurent gasped. Damen was large but he felt so good. Damen waited a moment, giving Laurent time to gather himself and adjust to him and then began to move slowly.

They both groaned. Laurent wrapped his legs around Damen and Damen leaned forward and placed his left palm on Laurent’s right palm, lacing their fingers together and holding it down. Laurent looked up at Damen as he moved in and out of him. It was intimate. It was softly passionate. Damen leaned into him. They were breathing the same air and Damen kissed his lips as he picked up his speed. It felt good. It felt right. 

Laurent felt Damen’s lips on his neck. His kisses and soft licks combined with his warmth breaths were intoxicating. He leaned his head over to side, granting Damen more access. Everything was more heady this time around. Laurent was more aware of the way Damen’s body moved in him and above him. His moans and breaths and kisses, his touches and licks. Everything was more.

Laurent was also much more aware of the way his body was responding. Rather, the positive way his body was responding to all this. He found himself moaning slightly and his free hand roaming Damen’s body and digging his fingertips into his back.

“It’s so good,” Laurent said, not quite able to stop himself. There was a slight pause and Damen then went in a bit deeper. Laurent gasped. Damen he not been this deep last time. It felt good. It all felt good. Damen let go of his hand and slid his arms under Laurent. He slid his hands up and curled his fingers around Laurent’s shoulders. Even like this, Laurent felt safe and not caged. He was aware of Damen panting faster. Laurent tightened his thighs around Damen.

“Laurent,” Damen panted. “Laurent. I’m... I’m...” and then Damen came.

Laurent felt the way his whole body shuddered above him. He felt Damen’s muscles flex and found his groans so sexy. Laurent panted as Damen laid on him, panting as well. Laurent closed his eyes. He tried to move and Damen felt it and he eased out of him and gave him room to breath. It was good. It had felt good. But afterwards, Laurent needed to breath on his own. He turned his back to Damen. He just needed to center himself alone.

Damen glanced over at Laurent, his pale back showing the marks of where Damen’s hands had been. Laurent’s skin showed everything. It was so beautiful to Damen. They cleaned up and then laid back down in bed. Damen put his hand out as he had earlier and Laurent took it and slid close, laying his head on Damen shoulder. Damen held him. Damen loved holding him.

Damen closed his eyes and couldn’t believe what had just happened. It had been more perfect that he had imagined. Laurent as well, was still feeling the emotional high.

“Is it always this good?” He asked lightheartedly. He ran his hand over Damen’s chest. 

“Not with anyone else I’ve been with,” Damen said softly as he turned towards Laurent to hold him better.

Laurent opened his eyes slightly and also turned toward Damen so they could fit better together. He felt the warm feeling spreading through him. It felt good. For tonight, just tonight, he would enjoy it without worrying about the future.

* * *

After the second time they had fallen sleep and slept all through the night. When Laurent woke up early in the morning, as the sun was rising, he laid there and felt that he had slept better than he had in years.

It felt good for a while until he started thinking about the fact that he was only feeling this way because of Damen and that he would never feel it again once Damen left. He clenched his jaw and looked out the window. He pushed the thought out of his head. He would be fine. He didn’t need anyone anyway. It was nice and would be nice and that was it. He just wouldn’t get too used to this.

Damen stirred. Laurent glanced his way and their gazes met as Damen opened his eyes. He smiled. Laurent felt that warmth in him spread all through his chest.

“Why are you awake?” Damen asked.

“I don’t know I just woke up,” Laurent said.

“Why? Go back to sleep,” Damen said in a husky voice and pulled Laurent to him. Laurent couldn’t help but chuckle into his neck. He felt Damen’s large warm hands run up and down his back and he felt safe. Damen took the fluffy comforter and wrapped it around them. Laurent smiled as he snuggled into Damen and closed his eyes.

* * *

They had awaken a couple of hours later and had showered and changed. They went out for brunch and then Laurent called Auguste.

“Just had brunch with Damen. We’re gonna stay out. Maybe catch a movie later,” Laurent said. He saw Damen glance his way and smile.

“Ok,” Auguste said. “Ada is coming over. Just text me and let me know where you guys are at and be home before midnight ok?”

“Ok,” Laurent said.

“Ok, see you later brother.”

“Yeah. Bye.”

Laurent hung up.

He and Damen spent the rest of the day together. They went to a few music stores and book stores and did indeed go watch a movie and then had dinner together and made it back before 10 pm. Laurent and Damen walked into Laurent’s room and Laurent called Auguste to tell him he was home.

When he and hung up Damen laughed as he pulled his shirt off and undid his jeans. He had sleeping clothes in Laurent’s room. “Uh, you could have gone and knocked on his door you know,” Damen said.

“No. Gross. Him and Ada are in there,” Laurent said as he pulled his own shirt off. His eyes wandered over Damen’s body. “Would you want him to come in here right now?” Laurent asked.

Damen slipped sleep pants on and walked towards the bed and plopped down on it, leaning back on his elbows and looking up Laurent. “You’re comparing us to August and Ada. Are you calling us boyfriends?”

Laurent rolled his eyes and he felt his cheeks flush. “Fuck sakes!” He said.

Damen laughed and scooted back on the bed. He grabbed the bag of books they had bought themselves. Laurent finished changing and got in bed beside him. “Want me to read to you?” Damen asked.

Laurent looked at him surprised. “What’s it about?” He asked looking at the book Damen had in his hands.

“Old Norse Tales,” Damen said.

Laurent looked at the shiny blue hard covered book and nodded. They got comfortable and Laurent watched Damen as he opened the book and began to read to him. Laurent watched Damen as he read and closed his eyes picturing the story Damen was reading. His father used to do this for him when he was a young boy. He hadn’t thought about this and had forgotten how much he loved it. It was something only he and his father had shared. He wondered if Damen had had something similar.

”Did your father use to read to you?” Laurent asked softly once Damen had finished his first story.

”No,” Damen said softly. Laurent glanced up at him. “I used to read to him.”

Laurent smiled. “Mine used to read to me.”

”Hmm,” Damen said, putting and arm around Laurent, who in turn placed his cheek on Damen’s chest. “Well now I have someone to read to and now you have someone to read to you.”

Laurent nodded and smiled and wondered what his father would have thought of Damen.


	23. XXIII

It had 10 days since Laurent and Damen had made love for the first time. Laurent hadn’t meant to kept count but it had just occurred to him because he could always remember the date. He hadn’t told Erasmus yet. He wanted to tell him in person when they went back to school. Part of him wanted to ask Damen if he had told Nik but then part of him didn’t want to know so he had kept quiet.

The next night they had come back Laurent had been a little nervous if maybe from then on Damen would have expected sex every night, but when Laurent had started to yawn once he was into his third Norse folktale, Damen had finished the story and turned off the light. He was in sleep pants and Laurent in a shirt and sleep pants and Damen hadn’t even thrown and arm over him or pulled him close. He had just been there. Just like before. It had been nice. It had been normal and relaxed.

Laurent had used the bathroom in the middle of the night and when he got back in bed he had watched Damen as he had slept for a while and then had been filled with wanting to lay on his chest. Laurent had placed a gentle hand on Damen’s chest. Damen had awaken and as Laurent has slid closer hadn’t said or asked anything. Once Laurent was laying on him, he held Laurent and they had woken up that way the next morning.

It had been like this. Comfortable. Peaceful. A week later, when Damen had asked which book Laurent wanted to be read from, after he had turned down music and a movie before bed, Laurent had said he wasn’t in the mood for stories and Damen had looked at him slightly confused and had seen the look in Laurent’s eyes and had known. He had nodded and Laurent had loved the smile on Damen’s handsome face.

They had kissed hungrily and Laurent had slid his hand down Damen’s body and inside his jogging pants. He was hard. Laurent had looked into Damen’s eyes and he had loved the look on his face. They had kissed and slid down on the bed and Laurent had turned on his stomach. “Like this,” He had said and Damen has obliged.

He had patiently and gently opened Laurent up. He took his time and he had kissed and softly marked Laurent’s back. Once Laurent was ready, Damen had slid inside and had been soft and gentle. This was a whole new feeling. Damen had lifted Laurent’s hips slightly and slid an arms across Laurent’s hips. His moves were controlled and it was obvious Damen was taking the utmost care with him.

Damen had stroked him as they had made love and Laurent was filled with the same pleasure he had experience when Damen had had his tongue, just more more intense. Damen has stilled for a moment and before Laurent had realized, he had began move his own hips between Damen’s hand and his hard on. Laurent had let go. He had come and then he had felt Damen let go.

Damen had held Laurent tightly and had buried his face in his neck as he had come and his groans had been right bellow Laurent’s ear. Laurent would never forget how he had sounded. It gave him chills.

Laurent glanced over at Damen now. Last night had been a bit of a late night too. They had kissed and touched each other. It had been slow. Very slow. Damen had been slow and tender and had taken his time. He hadn’t rushed, he had been deliberate and patient and had barely touched Laurent before he had made him come. Laurent, while still panting, had taken Damen in his hand and after a few expert strokes from Laurent’s hand, had also emptied himself. Laurent had remembered what Damen liked.

He bit his lip a bit and had gotten dressed. He thought maybe Damen would like some French toast and fruit. He would let him sleep and bring him breakfast in bed.

Laurent got up and slipped on some flannel pajamas and had pulled on a navy blue bathrobe. He slipped on his favorite fleeced lined suede slippers and went downstairs. He walked into the kitchen. The staff was preparing for the day. 

“Can I get two plates of French toast. Four toasts each and some cut up strawberries,” Laurent asked. 

“Yes young sir,” one of the cooks said.

Laurent smiled his way and walked to the fridge. He got orange juice. Maybe Damen would want orange juice and hot chocolate? But what if he slept a long while. The chocolate would get cold.

As he pondered this August walked in. The brothers smiled at one another and Auguste put his arm around Laurent’s shoulders. “Can I get two plates of pancakes. Three on each. One blueberry, one chocolate chip,” Auguste asked.

“Of course, young sir,” the same cook said.

Laurent and Auguste walked out to the dining room to wait for their trays of food, Laurent was sipping on his orange juice. Laurent sat at the dining room table and was surprised when Auguste sat beside him and not across as he normally did. Laurent glanced his way. Auguste was deep in thought and Laurent knew something was on his mind.

“Speak, brother,” Laurent said.

“I did what Nicaise said and followed some money trails and I believe he has at least 4 other victims,” Auguste said. Laurent froze. He regained his composure and sipped on more juice, not even tasting it. “He seemed to have given odd amounts of money and bought homes and cars for four employees with sons between the ages of eleven and fourteen.”

“Hmm,” Laurent said and remembered what Nicaise had said of his father. He wondered what the other stories were. He shook his head. He couldn’t handle those thoughts.

Auguste took a deep breath in. “We should go to the auth -“

“No.” Laurent said.

“Why?” Auguste asked.

“Because it will ruin all our father worked for. There will be lawsuits and the company would have to declare bankruptcy.”

Auguste stared at Laurent. “He has to pay,” He said. 

Laurent nodded. “He should pay, you mean,” Laurent said. “But sometimes in the real world the villains get away with shit.”

Auguste stayed quiet. “So you’re worried the hotel business will go belly up? That’s why you don’t want to turn him in?” Auguste asked after a moment of silence had passed.

Laurent gave Auguste his iciest look yet. “May I remind you, brother, that I have been wanting to run the business since before dad died?” Laurent whispered. “Dad took me around, even as a child, and showed me the hotels and said one day they would be mine and I plan to keep the business thriving,” Laurent said. “That monster has taken enough from me. He will not take the business my father built and wished I took over,” he continued. “And may I also remind you, Auguste, that De Vere Hotels employs over 800 people. Some of them since the first hotel opened. Are they to pay too? Because our uncle likes to fuck little boys? Do they deserve to be fucked over too?”

Auguste froze as he listened to Laurent. He had never seen Laurent like this. He wasn’t sure whether to be scared or proud.

At that moment the dining room door swung open and staff came in with their trays of food. Auguste watched as Laurent asked for two glasses of orange juice.

Auguste stood up and took the tray with the plates of pancakes. “Brother maybe you should tell Damen -“

“No!” Laurent said giving him a poisonous look. “And if you ever tell him I will never speak to you again.”

Auguste didn’t doubt it. “No, brother. I never will. I really like Damen,” Auguste said and meant it.

“Good,” Laurent said. Another maid came in and gave Laurent his two tall glasses of orange juice. Laurent watched as she walked out again. Once they were alone, Laurent then said something else that was on his mind. “If it is true that there were four more families, have you thought about the fact that those boys probably don’t know their parent or parents were paid off to not go to the authorities?” They stared at each other. “How would you feel if you knew your parents knew but said nothing because their silence was bought?”

Auguste looked at Laurent. He didn’t know what to say. “I... I -“

“I’m not telling anyone. I don’t wish to relive it and I don’t wish to tell anyone what... what was done or what I did.”

Auguste looked at him. “You did nothing wrong! You were a child -“

“Stop!” Laurent wasn’t going to have this conversation with Auguste or anyone.

Auguste nodded. “Sorry,” he said and Laurent just nodded back.

The brothers walked out the dining room and up the stairs and to their respective rooms without speaking another word to each other.

* * *

Laurent wasn’t hungry anymore. He sat there on his bed and tried to not remember. To not feel. To not fall down the dark abyss that were his feelings at the moment. Damen was still sleeping and a part of Laurent wished to wake him and tell him to hold him tight. Tell him to make him not think... Was that healthy? Maybe if Damen fucked him enough times he would completely forget...

Laurent closed his eyes and leaned his head back on his headboard. He wanted to keep afloat of the dark feelings that were threatening to swallow him up. But the tightness that started in the middle of his chest spread across, all the way to his shoulders and down to his stomach. Then the tightness started going up his throat. Laurent snapped forward. Tears slid down his cheeks. He was gasping. His heart was racing. He couldn’t breath.

“Laurent?” He heard Damen ask. Laurent shook his head. He needed to be alone. No one could see him like this. He would go in his closet and hide from Damen. He leaned forward and placed his palms on the bed. He was still gasping. “Laurent!” Damen said and quickly sat up and went to Laurent and wrapped him tightly in his arms.

No, Laurent wanted to say. No. Don’t squeeze me, I can’t breath. “It’s ok, baby. Breathe. Just breathe,” Damen said as he held Laurent tightly. Laurent closed his eyes, tears now sliding down his neck as well. Damen held him tight and Laurent leaned into him and he breathed. Short gasping breaths but then little by little, after a while, they became more normal. Laurent was still gasping a little and crying a little. He leaned against Damen, his forehead against Damen’s neck. Damen’s muscular arms were around him, hands on Laurent’s right hip, Laurent was holding on to Damen’s left bicep.

Laurent took a deep breath in and out and his heart began to beat normally. They sat there a moment. 

“I brought you breakfast,” Laurent finally said.

“Thank you,” Damen whispered and kissed Laurent’s forehead.

They sat up and Laurent got up and went and washed his face. He put his hair up and returned to the bedroom. He sat beside Damen and leaned against him.

“Eat,” Damen told him and Laurent wanted to say no but he took a couple of bites of French toast. Then he ate more. And then a bit more. They each finished their plates.

Laurent was waiting for Damen to ask. Panic attacks weren’t an every day thing, in fact, Laurent had never had one this bad, but there was a first time for everything. But Damen didn’t ask and they sat there and Damen talked and joked around and kept light conversation going. They did this for almost an hour.

They got out of bed and changed and Damen asked him if he felt like going out or playing his violin.

“Neither,” Laurent said. “I want to go work out.”

“Nice! Let’s go!” Damen said with a grin.

They went downstairs, to the gym, and Laurent changed and started practicing his fencing. He felt good, the physical exertion made him feel alive. After he was done fencing he decided to run on his treadmill. He wasn’t too sure what Damen was doing but once he was done, he got off and Damen handed him a water bottle from the small fridge they had down there.

“You look really hot all sweaty and everything,” Damen said grinning.

Laurent chuckled. “Do I?”

“Mmhmm,” Damen said.

Laurent was still panting slightly from the workout. Damen was sitting down on one of the benches looking up at Laurent, who walked over and pulled him up and kissed him. 

“What are you doing?” Damen asked, voice husky.

“What am I doing? You are not very observant,” Laurent said as he kissed Damen deeper, pressing him against the wall.

Damen looked down at him. “You’re not yourself.”

“No?” Laurent asked and he slid his hand down Damen’s body and palmed him over his clothing. Damen closed his eyes and moaned. Laurent loved how Damen’s body responded to the slightest of touches he administered. Laurent stepped back and took off his shirt. Damen looked at him, panting as well. Laurent licked his lips and slipped his pants off. “Make me come,” he said.

Damen undressed quickly and as well and stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Laurent as he kissed him. They kissed and touched and then they were on the gym mats on the floor with Laurent in top. His erection rubbing Damen’s. It felt good. He wanted this. He... needed this.

He looked down at Damen’s face and the way he closed his eyes and groaned and the faces he made. Laurent loved the faces Damen made when they were being intimate. He knew when Damen was getting close, which was now. He was as well. He leaned down and kissed Damen and their lips were on each other’s as they came together. Once he was done, Laurent rolled off and laid beside Damen on the floor. They were both panting.

“Anyone can come down here and find us,” Damen said.

“Let them,” said Laurent. They looked at each other and laughed. They looked back up at the ceiling. “You didn’t ask,” Laurent said, recalling how Damen had not asked what had triggered the panic attack earlier.

“Because you’ll tell me when you’re ready,” Damen said.

“What if I’m never ready?” Laurent asked, for once not trying to hide the emotion in his voice. 

Damen turned to face him and looked at Laurent. They gazed into each other’s eyes. Damen smiled softly. “Then just always let me help,” Damen said. Laurent kept looking at him. “Ok?”

“K,” Laurent said softly. He swallowed. He thought how much faster he had felt better with Damen helping him. He wouldn’t worry today what he would do if Damen ever left him, he decided. He wouldn’t worry about this. Not today.


	24. XXIV

School started back up and Laurent was glad it was the day his uncle returned. Auguste was home though, but so was Ada and Laurent knew Auguste would say nothing because he had promised. Auguste kept promises. Laurent had also asked Auguste how much longer it would be till he was his legal guardian.

“I already have a lawyer on it. Don’t worry brother. I will take care of it. I promise,” Auguste had said. Laurent felt satisfied with that answer.

Laurent and Damen climbed up the steps to the school. Nik and Erasmus were inside and the four of them greeted each other. When it was time for Nik and Damen to go, Laurent had pulled on Damen’s pull over and brushed their lips together. Laurent had seen the slight blush on Damen’s cheeks. He had liked it. Erasmus and Laurent walked to their class as well.

“That was sweet,” Erasmus said.

“He is sweet,” Laurent replied.

* * *

Laurent and Erasmus were on lunch, sitting beside each other, at their own table, as was their custom. Laurent took a deep breath in. He glanced at Erasmus. “We had sex,” he whispered.

Erasmus’s head snapped up from the homework was working on. He closed his binder and pushed it aside and turned to Laurent. His eyes were wide. “Yeah?” He whispered back.

“Yes,” Laurent said and finally looked Erasmus in the eyes. He watched as Erasmus grinned and looked around the cafeteria. His eyes came back to rest on Laurent’s. “Did you top or bottom?”

“Bottom only,” Laurent said looking at Erasmus. “You?”

Erasmus grinned. “Nik likes to bottom!” He whispered quietly and his pretty green eyes widened. He blushed.

Laurent laughed softly. He looked at his friend. “What do you like?”

Erasmus seemed to think about it. “I like both,” he said. “Nik can get a bit rough though,” he said.

“He hasn’t hurt you has he?” Laurent asked suddenly worried.

“No! No, no, no,” Erasmus said. “He just... can get carried away easily.” Erasmus blushed and smiled as if remembering. 

“Not Damen,” Laurent found himself saying. He wasn’t even thinking. Erasmus had always made Laurent feel safe and he knew he could share intimate details. “Damen is so gentle and caring and he takes his time with everything.” Laurent felt his face warm. He glanced at Erasmus who was smiling sweetly.

“That sounds really romantic,” he said.

“It is,” Laurent replied. Maybe he would tell Damen how romantic he was next time they were intimate. He figured Damen would really like hearing that.

* * *

The weekend before Auguste was to leave, he knocked on Laurent’s room. Damen was inside as well and when he saw it was Auguste he got up to leave.

“You don’t have to go,” Laurent had said, slightly annoyed.

“Hey, it’s ok, I’ll be right back after,” Damen replied and had stroked Laurent’s cheek.

Auguste and him had smiled at one another and once he had left and closed the door Auguste came and sat on Laurent’s bed.

“Brother if you wish me to stay home I will, so you’re not left with _him_.” Auguste had only referred to their uncle as ‘him’ since he had found out about everything.

“I appreciate it brother,” Laurent said and he meant it. “But uncle was done with me the moment my voice broke and I started growing body hair.” Laurent didn’t miss the way Auguste blanched at his words. “How goes the legal proceedings regarding my guardianship?”

“It was done this morning,” Auguste said.

Laurent looked at him shocked. “It was?”

“Yes,” Auguste said. “Normally it would be an issue since I’m still in college and not making money, but our family has money, so now I hold your inharitance till you’re 18 and your position at the hotel until you’re 21. Once you’re 21 and have taken over the business you will begin to get your salary from working there.”

Laurent heard all this and nodded. “Uncle just signed my guardianship to you?” He asked.

August nodded. “Yes. I had all the legal paper work drawn up and my lawyer was present. I told him I wanted guardianship over you and he didn’t even question me,” Auguste said. 

Laurent felt a slight wave of panic. Why didn’t he fight it? “Why was it so easy?” Laurent asked. He looked at Auguste and he saw the look of panic on his face.

“Laurent? What’s wrong?” Auguste asked.

“Why was it so easy?” Laurent asked again. “How long ago was this?”

Auguste looked at Laurent, confused. “Maybe four hours ago,” he said. 

Laurent stood up. “I want an emergency meeting with the board of directors,” Laurent demanded. Auguste nodded. He had never done this so he contacted the one person he knew he trust. Jord. 

“Jord, hello it’s Auguste De Vere,” Auguste said. “You’re on speaker with my brother and I,” he said. 

“Oh, hello to you both,” he said. He sounded friendly but Laurent heard the edge in his voice. “Something the matter?” He asked. The brothers had never done this before.

“Ah, well, we’re wondering if we could have an emergency board meeting,” Auguste said. He sounded very calm.

Silence. “May I ask why?” Jord asked. Auguste looked at Laurent.

“August has just become my legal guardian barely four hours ago. I wish my uncle be off the board of directors,” Laurent said. 

Auguste eyes widened slightly. “This is something we both want Jord.”

Silence again. “I see,” he said. “May I ask why again young sirs.”

“He does not have the best interest of the business at heart,” Auguste said and Laurent felt relief wash through him. They would see he was not alone in this. The brothers would show a united front.

Silence from Jord again. “He will need to be replaced,” he said when he finally spoke.

“I will leave that task to you, Jord, as you were always someone my father greatly respected and admired,” Laurent said with a suave voice. “I’m just afraid my uncle can no longer be trusted. Plus, he was only looking after my share of the affairs until I took over. My brother has my legal rights now. When my time comes, I hope you will take me under your wing and teach me as my father would have,” Laurent said. 

“Oh, young sir,” Jord said and Laurent didn’t miss the emotion in his voice. “Yes. Of course. I will be honored to. I will get a conference call going. I will call you both back within ten minutes.” 

Laurent and Auguste smiled at one another.

Jord kept his word. Not even 10 minutes later, the board of directors for the hotels were all on a conference call. Jord explained the situation to the rest. He mentioned Auguste now had legal authority of Laurent’s part of the business and he feared their uncle no longer had the best interest at heart for the business. There was some grumbling. After some other questions, they took a vote. They unanimously voted to have Laurent’s and Auguste’s uncle removed from the board of directors. Jord said he was actively looking for a replacement and one should be appointed in two weeks.

The call was over and then Jord called August and Laurent back. “There now, both of you. Don’t worry. Let me know if I can be of any help. Laurent, your business is waiting for you when you come of age,” Jord said.

* * *

Laurent and August walked out of Laurent’s bedroom. They walked down the stairs and past them, straight down the hallway to another wing of the house. A wing only his uncle used. Auguste walked beside Laurent. They had discussed what they would say.

They reached their uncle’s office. Auguste knocked. Silence. Auguste knocked again.

“He’s gone,” Mrs. Paschal said. They turned to face her. She had come up behind them.

“What?” Auguste asked.

“He’s gone,” she repeated.

* * *

Laurent was in a bit of a haze. He remembered though, that he had called Damen on his cell phone and he had rushed down to be with Laurent.

Mrs. Paschal showed Auguste the letter their uncle had handed her before wishing her good luck. Auguste decided to call his lawyer. He had come over and read the letter which simply stated their uncle was resigning from all duties of the company and that Laurent’s legal guardian was now Auguste. He had sold his share of stocks that he owned in the hotel.

Auguste called Jord with the news. He told them not to worry and that this seemed the best way for it to be.

Laurent looked around at his uncle’s office. He hadn’t been here in years. He felt almost nauseous being here. Laurent had walked out and walked further down to his uncle’s room. He took a breath in before walking inside. He checked the closet and drawers. They were empty. He turned and saw Damen at the doorway. 

He walked past Damen and down the hall and walked into the large garage the home had. All the cars were there except his uncle’s favorite. Technically that was the only car in his uncle’s name. All the others had been acquired through the business.

Damen showed up beside him. “Are you ok?” He asked softly. His voice echoed slightly in the large garage.

“It’s just too perfect,” Laurent said. 

“What?” Damen asked.

“I’ve been wanting him gone for years and suddenly he just does it. I thought it would be a fight. I thought it would be so much harder. I never thought he would just leave.” Laurent glanced at Damen. He half worried how Damen would react to all he said.

Damen slid his hands in his pockets and looked around the garage. “Well,” he said. “People only leave out of fear. What could he be afraid of?” 

Laurent looked into Damen’s eyes. They stared at one another for a moment. “The truth,” Laurent said softly. 

“Well then, maybe the truth finally caught up with him,” Damen said with a shrug.

* * *

Laurent glanced over at his phone. 3:47 am. He hadn’t been able to sleep at all. Damen was breathing peacefully beside him. The day’s events still felt... strange.

Auguste’s had told Laurent everything was ok regarding the hotels. “It’ll be business as usual brother,” he said.

“You don’t have the time to worry about the business though, plus you want to be a lawyer. What about whatever uncle was handling.”

“Nothing Jord can’t handle. I trust him. Father trusted him,” August had said.

“As do I,” Laurent said.

“Ok then. He actually sounded relieved uncle was gone,” Auguste said. “He will call you every weekend from now on if you wish, fill you in on how the hostels are doing, etc. He can slowly ease you into running the business.” 

“Tell him yes, I’d like that,” Laurent had said.

He laid in bed now, still feeling this was just too easy. He knew his uncle had money. He had sold his stocks in the hotel, yes, but he had investments and god knows what else. The De Veres were old money. Laurent sighed. He was waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under him and he hated that feeling more than anything.

He got up to used to bathroom. Once he was done he splashed some cold water on his face and dried it. He walked back to the bedroom. He glanced towards Auguste’s room. His brother would leave tomorrow. It would only be he and Damen at home. Mrs. Paschal took care of all the bills of the home anyway, Laurent had found out. She had even been signing any school forms he had had. 

Laurent’s fencing tournaments were all set to start. His uncle had come to a few and Laurent hadn’t particularly liked it, but... but regardless there had been someone at home to go to them. Now, there was no one. Auguste would go if he could, but Harvard was a two hour drive away and unless it was a weekend tournament, which rarely happened, there was truly a 100% chance no one would ever come to a fencing tournament for Laurent. Ever.

Laurent let out a breath. He suddenly felt a bit empty. But why? His uncle was not a good person. He was not a good man... and yet. No. No. Laurent would never ever miss him. His uncle had brought him nothing but misery.

He walked back into the bedroom and got back in bed. Damen stirred a bit and looked up at Laurent. Their gazes met.

“Are you alright?” He asked.

Laurent swallowed. “Would Miss Daisy come to my fencing tournaments, you think?” 

Damen sat up. “Yeah,” Damen said. “She always came to my wrestling ones. She was going to once mine started. When do yours start?” Damen asked.

“In three weeks,” Laurent said softly.

“Yeah. She will,” Damen said and he suddenly looked very awake. He smiled at Laurent. “You should sleep. Ok?”

“Yeah,” Laurent said. 

They both slid down and Laurent turned his back to Damen. He was wide awake. He slid a bit closer to Damen. He could feel the warmth of his body. With one soft motion, Laurent slid back another bit. His body was now up against Damen’s completely. 

After a moment, Damen leaned in and kissed Laurent on the cheek. He then very softly put his hand on Laurent’s hip. It felt good. It wasn’t suffocating. Laurent closed his eyes. Eventually he fell sleep.

* * *

The following day, before he left for school, Auguste made Laurent save a million phone numbers on his phone. All the board members and something else to with this and that for the hotel. Laurent listened intently. He made sure to put all the information he needed for each contact in his phone. He wanted to show Auguste he was responsible. He had woken up glad. Glad he was gone.

Laurent bid his brother a farewell and then took Damen by the hand and got Mrs. Paschal to call all the staff of the home.

“I just want to let you all know that my uncle is gone,” he told them. There was a slight murmuring amongst them. Laurent gave them a minute. “Nothing will change,” Laurent said. “Mrs. Paschal is still in charge and if any of you have any concerns feel free to tell Damianos or me. This is my home after all,” he said. He saw how they looked at Damen, the shock on their faces. “Do any of you have a problem with Damianos?” He asked. There was a chorus of no’s. Laurent nodded. “Ok then,” he said with a smile. “Thank you all.”

* * *

Life went on as usual and Laurent even felt a lightness he hadn’t quite expected. He no longer feared just being anywhere in the house, wondering if his uncle showed up and there was no worry if he saw him and Damen together.

Damen and him even watched movies in the media room off the dining room and Laurent and Damen leaned on each other and did as they pleased. No one was there but the staff, who truly kept to themselves but were cordial to Laurent and of course to Damen. Miss Paschal would show Laurent a menu for their meals for the week and on their third week alone, Laurent though he would let Damen decide if he liked what he saw or not. Laurent saw it made Damen uncomfortable. Laurent ended up okaying whatever Mrs. Paschal had chosen for food for the week.

Once she had left, Laurent turned to Damen. “Why did that make you uncomfortable?” He asked.

“Because I’m not used to that,” Damen said. “And this isn’t my home. And those people are not my staff. I’m not their boss. I don’t.. I don’t like it.”

Laurent had stared at Damen. “Not your home?”

Damen looked at Laurent. “Laurent -“

“No. No. You still can’t wait to leave? Is that it?” He asked. “You still can’t wait to leave this place behind.”

“Laurent that’s not what I meant!” Damen said.

“Well what did you mean?” Laurent asked and he was surprised at how emotional his voice sounded.

“What I mean is I’m just a guest in this home, Laurent,” Damen said stepping close to him. He took Laurent’s hands in his. Laurent let him. His heart was pounding. “You are the rightful owner and I am merely a guest.”

“Well what’s mine is yours,” Laurent said quickly and he couldn’t quite meet Damen’s eyes. He hated feeling so emotional.

He heard Damen chuckle and then Damen pulled him close. “You are such a sweet and wonderful person,” Damen said. “I’ve never met anyone better than you.”

“Shut up,” Laurent whispered but he smiled into Damen’s shoulder. He wrapped his arms around him as well.

Miss Daisy did indeed come to Laurent’s tournaments, along with Damen and Erasmus and Nik. Laurent enjoyed looking into the crowd and seeing them all.

His first tournament happened to be a Friday and Laurent and Damen went inside Miss Daisy’s home afterwards for a while and she made them hot chocolate. Laurent was feeling a bit tired and glanced at Damen to see if he was ready to go. He noticed Damen kept looking around.

“What is it?” Laurent asked him.

“Nothing,” Damen said.

Laurent looked at him. It sunk into him, Damen didn’t feel like a guest here. This was his home. “Miss Daisy, would you mind if Damen and I spent the night?” Laurent asked. He saw Damen’s eyes widen.

Miss Daisy looked surprised but happy. “Oh that would be lovely!” She said.

“Can we stay till Sunday?” Laurent asked.

“Oh you two can stay as long as you want!” She said happily.

“Ok, we just have to go and get some clothes,” Laurent said. He looked at Damen. “We should hurry. We need to go pack.”

Damen nodded and they left with Laurent calling out that they would be right back.

“Can you drive?” Laurent asked. “I’m tired.”

“Yeah,” Damen said and they climbed into their car. Laurent leaned his seat back a bit and closed his eyes. “Why did you do that?” Damen asked.

Laurent kept his eyes closed. “That’s your home,” he said. “You miss it and I want to make you happy. You’re a guest in my home. I can be a guest in yours right?” 

“Right,” Damen said and Laurent could hear the smile in his voice. He turned his head and opened his eyes and sure enough, Damen was smiling. “The bed I habe is a full size, Laurent. We’ll be, you know, pretty close. There won’t be any extra room.”

Laurent took a deep breath in and out. “Good.” He said. 


	25. XXV

Laurent was super tired by the time they returned to Miss Daisy’s home. “I need to shower,” he told Damen. He hadn’t showered at home since the drive between the homes was about 45 minutes and all he could think about was getting in bed. Damen got him a towel and bathrobe and pointed Laurent to the small bathroom the home had.

Once Laurent had showered he went back to the bedroom and found Damen waiting for him. “Hey,” Laurent said.

“Hey,” Damen whispered smiling.

Laurent changed into a long sleeved tee shirt and some flannel pants. There was a soft knock at the door.

“Yes?” Damen called out.

“Just checking you boys were ok. Did you want some more hot chocolate or warm milk and cookies?”

Laurent’s eyes widened. “I’ll take warm milk and cookies!” He said and Damen said he wanted more hot chocolate and they walked out to the kitchen and got what they needed then went back to the bedroom and got in bed.

Damen was right, it was tighter, they were closer together but Laurent didn’t mind. He glanced over at Damen as he drank his hot chocolate. Damen looked over. “What?” He asked.

“Would you like to come home every weekend?” Laurent asked.

“What?” Damen asked furrowing his brow.

“We could come. Every weekend. Not just for a lunch visit. If Miss Daisy wouldn’t mind, we could come Friday after school and then go to my home Monday after school,” Laurent asked.

Damen felt his heart thumping in his chest. “You would... you would do that? For me?”

Laurent blinked quickly a few times. We wished Damen wouldn’t act that way... make such a big deal over little stuff. It made him uncomfortable. Laurent looked at Damen and shook his head. “Well you’re such a baby about being a guest in my home and all that,” Laurent said.

Damen stared smiling. Laurent looked even more annoyed. “Oh I see. I’m a baby?” Damen asked.

“Yes!” Laurent said and grabbed a cookie and dunk it into his warm milk. “A big fucking baby!”

* * *

Saturday morning Miss Daisy was already making breakfast for Damen and Laurent when they came out, still in their pajamas. Laurent sat down at the small table and looked around. Miss Daisy’s dining table was in her kitchen. He looked at her small living room which barely fit the sofa which was up against the wall and then the love seat adjacent and an easy chair up against the wall beside the door. He could even see down the hallway that led to the two bedrooms and the one bathroom.

Laurent glanced at Damen and Miss Daisy. He watched as she wiped the stove clean after having cooked on it. It looked as shiny as the day it had been delivered to her home.

* * *

Damen and Laurent left at about 4:30 in the afternoon to meet Nik and Erasmus for their double date.

“Did Erasmus tell you we’re going bowling?” Damen asked. Laurent stopped and made a face before getting in the car on the passenger side. Damen had the keys since Laurent told him he could drive. “Why are you making that face?” Damen asked.

“It must have been Nik’s idea,” Laurent said.

“I don’t know,” Damen said as they climbed inside the car and started pulling on their seat belts. “He just told me he and Erasmus had talked and wanted to go bowling. You know we pick a night and they pick a night and since we all watched you compete last night it was only right they chose tonight,” Damen said.

Laurent rolled his eyes. “You and what’s right and fair,” Laurent murmured.

Damen grinned. “It’s only right baby,” Damen said and kissed him on the forehead.

* * *

They were at the bowling alley and Laurent kept looking down at his shoes. “Remind me to buy my own pair of these hideous things,” he told Damen.

“Ok,” Damen said. He grinned.

“It’s not funny. If one of my toes falls off, it will be because I’ve caught a flesh eating bacteria or some super fungus from these shoes. I can only imagine the hundreds of disgusting -“

“Hey, your royal highness, if you’re done complaining, it’s your turn,” Nik said.

Laurent gave Nik and incredibly friendly yet fake smile. “Why thank you, Nikandros,” Laurent said.

Damen bit his lip to hold in his laughter. Nikandros was in a foul mood. Laurent had said he didn’t want to bowl and had complained to Damen the whole drive there. Once they got there, Laurent said he didn’t think anyone was going to have fun, to which Nik had asked him if he was saying that because he was afraid to loose.

Damen had seen how Erasmus’s eyes had widened and had said yes they should go somewhere else and suddenly Laurent had said no, they should play and Damen wasn’t sure what was going on. He now understood. Laurent was an incredible bowler. Somehow it didn’t surprise Damen. He knew Laurent enough now to know that if Laurent wanted to be good at something he just was. He sort of had a natural talent for anything.

The game was almost over, they were of course bowling in pairs and Damen, like Nik and Erasmus was an average bowler but Laurent was incredible. His score was already over 200 and gladly the game was almost over. Once it was over, Nikandros tried to act like he didn’t care and shook hands with Damen and smiled at Laurent. He took off to turn in his shoes.

“He’s a sore lose,” Erasmus said quietly.

“Hmm, just mount him and make him forget,” Laurent said offhandedly.

“Shut up!” Erasmus said smacking Laurent in the arm but Damen saw Erasmus’s huge grin.

* * *

Laurent had his seat leaning back quite a bit. Had told Damen he was so full. They had stopped at The Habit after the bowling massacre. Laurent rolled his eyes at how Erasmus was feeding Nik French fries.

Laurent was actually quite hungry and had ordered two burgers with fries and a milkshake. “Your tummy’s gonna hurt,” Damen said giving him a look.

“Mind your business!” Laurent had said and had eaten everything to prove a point. So he was incredibly full and had his eyes closed and was trying to not think of how full he was as Damen drove them home.

“You ate too much didn’t you?” Damen asked.

“Shut up,” Laurent said without opening his eyes.

Damen laughed. He looked at the road and then asked what he had been wanting to ask since he had heard Laurent make the comment he had made to Erasmus. “Does Nik bottom?”

Laurent opened an eye and turned his head towards Damen. “Why? You wanna fuck him?” Laurent asked.

Damen made a face and looked at Laurent. “No! And you know I don’t. I just heard how you told Erasmus to mount him so I was just curious.”

Laurent opened both eyes and looked at Damen. “Don’t you two bros talk about this stuff?” Laurent asked a bit incredulously.

“No,” Damen answered. “Well,” he said hesitantly and Lauren just stayed silent and raised his eyebrows at Damen. Damen could feel himself blushing. Damen wasn’t sure how Laurent always did this to him. Somehow Damen would ask Laurent a question yet it was always Damen who ended up spilling everything. “Well, I mean I know he and Erasmus have sex just like he knows you and I have sex.”

“Uh huh,” Laurent said slowly.

“But, we don’t share THAT many details,” Damen told him.

“Hmmm,” Laurent said as he kept staring at Damen. 

Damen huffed as they stopped at a red light. “He said how it felt to be inside Erasmus but he never said anything about Erasmus being inside him!” Damen finally said in a rush of words.

“Oh,” Laurent said. He looked at the road. Damen started driving again. Laurent thought for a moment. “Does the thought of him being bottom bother you?” Laurent asked him.

“No,” Damen said and Laurent believed him. “No, I just wonder why he never mentioned it. He didn’t exclude a single fucking detail about being on top!” 

Laurent sat still. “Did you?” Laurent asked.

“Did I what?” Damen asked.

“Did you tell him every detail about us?” Laurent asked.

“No,” Damen answered. “No I didn’t quite describe the act.” Laurent looked at Damen’s handsome profile. “No I just told him how incredibly beautiful you were. How nervous I was,” he glanced at Laurent and Laurent felt his cheeks begin to warm. “I told him how it had never felt that way with anyone else and how lucky I felt that I was there with you. That I was the one that got to make love to you.”

Laurent was sure he was blushing now. He looked away and out the window. He felt that warmth Damen made him feel spread through him. His heart was pounding and his breathing was uneven. He finally felt composed enough to talk once they were almost back at Miss Daisy’s. “That’s sweet of you to have said,” Laurent stated.

“Well, it was just the truth,” Damen answered. Laurent knew it was and that’s what made it even more incredible.

* * *

Damen and Laurent made it home and they quietly walked inside. Laurent quietly walked into the bedroom and he heard Damen go and tell Miss Daisy they were home. Laurent was changing as Damen walked into the bedroom. He changed as well and soon enough they were both under the covers. Laurent turned and faced Damen and when Damen noticed he turned and faced Laurent as well.

He reached over and caressed Laurent’s cheek. He could do this now, he knew this. Laurent smiled at him. “I’m happy,” Laurent said.

“Good,” Damen answered. “I want you to always be happy.”

“I’m gonna be sad when you go away to college,” Laurent said.

Damen chuckled. “Who says I’m going away to college?” He sighed. “I’m going to take a year off and work and then I’ll start at the community college next year. I can do classes online or whatever.”

Laurent glanced at him. “What do you want to study?”

“Not sure,” Damen said. “Maybe I could be a teacher.”

Laurent leaned up on his elbow. “Really?” He asked.

Damen looked away from Laurent. “My father was a teacher,” he told him quietly. “A good one too. He cared a lot. It would be nice, you know? I could teach and it would be in honor of him.”

“Would you want to? Would it make you happy?” Laurent asked.

“Yes,” Damen answered. “I mean, I want to help people,” he said. “I’ve thought of being a firefighter or a cop. I had those aspiration when I was younger. Then I got into the foster care system.” Laurent stayed quiet and looked down at him. “And I saw, you know, kids that just needed someone. Guidance. Help. Someone that cared.”

Laurent’s heart was beating hard and fast. He knew. He knew what that felt like. “Yeah,” he whispered.

“I don’t know. Maybe if I’m a teacher maybe one day a student can come to me and ask me for help and maybe I can help him or her. And even if that never happens, maybe I can just be a positive and supportive voice.”

Laurent nodded. “What do you want to teach?” He asked Damen. 

“Middle school,” He said. He looked at Laurent and smiled.

Laurent smiled back. “That’s perfect,” he said.

He laid back down and looked over Damen who had never looked more handsome. Damen looked at Laurent and enjoyed the way he was looking at him. He reached up to caress his face and was surprised when Laurent kissed his palm instead. Laurent leaned in and kissed him.

Damen looked at Laurent and leaned in slightly to see if he wanted to keep on kissing. Laurent did. He wrapped his arms around Damen’s neck and pulled him close. They kissed a moment and then Laurent pulled Damen on top of him. He wrapped his legs around him. Damen was hard in no time. He wondered if Laurent wanted more and was quickly shown he did when Laurent pushed down not only Damen’s pants, but his own as well.

Damen got up and took his shirt off. He grabbed a condom and lube from their overnight bag. When he returned to bed, Laurent had taken his top off as well. Damen quickly got on top of Laurent and pulled the covers over them. He gazed down at Laurent. His heart felt like it could burst. He leaned in and softly kissed his neck. He nuzzled it gently and then he kissed along Laurent’s shoulder. Slow and deliberate kisses.

After tenderly preparing Laurent, Damen slid inside and started making love to him. He was slow and gentle and they were both very quiet. Laurent pulled Damen close, his fingertips grabbing onto his muscular back. Damen’s lips were at Laurent’s neck and jaw and the soft skin right under his jaw was tenderly kissed as well. Every soft gasp Laurent made as he came permeated Damen’s skin and Laurent also felt a tingling over his body when Damen softly groaned in his ear when he emptied himself as well.

After they cleaned up, Damen pulled Laurent to him. It was the first time Damen had done this. He had always waited to see what Laurent wanted to do, but he felt so close to him, he felt so connected. Laurent had felt it too and he let Damen pull him close and spoon him. He also let Damen throw and arm around him. Laurent enjoyed it. It had felt right. 


	26. XXVI

February passed and when March began some students started getting college acceptance letters. March also meant Laurent’s birthday was coming and Erasmus eagerly told Laurent they should have a huge party since his uncle wasn’t there to say no. Laurent was all for the idea. His birthday was on a Monday, which he and Damen had already decided they weren’t going to go to school on, so the party was to happen the weekend before.

Word spread quickly through school and soon enough every junior and senior at Collins Prep was talking about nothing else but the party. Laurent was excited.

The Thursday before, he and Damen were driving home when his phone rang. It was Auguste. Laurent presses the button on his steering wheel to answer.

“Hello, brother!” Laurent said cheerfully.

“Don’t hello brother me! What is this that you’re having a party! Why did I have to hear it through the grape vine and not you?!”

Laurent made a face. “What the fuck! Who told you!”

“Who cares who told me! Laurent, I forbid it!”

“Forbid it! It’s my fucking birthday! I deserve a party!” He said loudly.

“Damen!” Auguste said. “Damn it I know what time it is, I know you’re driving home from school!” Damen stayed quiet a moment. “DAMEN!”

“Don’t yell at him!” Laurent said loudly.

“Yes? Yes, Auguste I’m here.”

“Damen. You better make sure nothing happens Damen. You’re almost 18, you -“

“Oh Auguste SHUT UP! As if you didn’t do all kinds of dumb shit -“

“Oh I did! Which is why I’m trying to not get in any fucking trouble over under age drinking happening at home when I’m your legal guardian and not even there!” Laurent rolled his eyes. “I know you’re rolling your eyes damn it!” Auguste said. “Someone needs to be there. A chaperon.”

“What?” Laurent said. “What the fuck. I don’t need a fucking chaperon!”

“You’re sixteen Laurent! Sixteen!”

“Miss Daisy will be there!” Laurent said.

“She will?” Auguste asked clearly not believing Laurent. Damen stared at Laurent in shock.

“Yes, yes she will be.”

“I don’t believe you.” Auguste said.

“You don’t have to. Saturday around noon, call me, FaceTime me and you will see she will be at home with Damen and I and she will be there till she leaves Sunday. She will chaperon.”

Auguste sighed. “Fine,” he said. “No skipping school Monday!” He said. 

“I am not going to school on my birthday! I deserve to enjoy the day and I will and YOU can’t tell me shit because you never went to school on your birthday either! Not at all in high school!”

“Laurent! I -“

“No! I don’t want to hear it! Your junior year you stayed home to and fucked Reese Stein all fucking day and I heard when she told you she didn’t like how the condom felt and you told her you could take it off and you would pull out in time!” Laurent said with a smug smile on his face. Damen’s mouth was hanging wide open. 

“Laurent!” Auguste said angrily. “I swear to -“

“No!” Laurent said. “No I’m staying home! You won’t make me go! Least me and Damen don’t run the risk of teenage pregnancy!”

Damen could hear Auguste huffing on the phone. “Fuck sakes!” Auguste said. “Fine! Stay home Monday!”

“I was going to anyway big brother!” Laurent said. “Bye!”

“Jesus. Bye!” Auguste said and hung up. Laurent was grinning.

Damen shook his head. “Remind me to never stand in your way of anything you want,” Damen said chuckling.

“No, you remind yourself of that Damianos,” Laurent said smugly. 

* * *

Once home they went to Laurent’s room. “So, you’re going to have to call Miss Daisy and she’s spending the weekend with us.”

“Uh, I don’t see how that will make anything better,” Damen said. “Miss Daisy is the sweetest thing and how is she going to keep a bunch of rowdy teenagers in check?”

“Ok, Auguste was exaggerating. First off, nothing is going to happen except everyone having a good time. I’ve hired the same security people Nik hired for his party,” Laurent said. “I just didn’t tell Auguste because he would have never believed me because he still thinks I’m like 12.”

“Security?” Damen asked.

“Yes, they were at Nik’s birthday party. Damen, I’m not leaving anything to chance. They’ll make sure no one comes upstairs to the bedrooms and will make sure anyone truly rowdy gets removed. I’m not dumb! I wanna have fun. Anyway, call miss Daisy, she’s invited. Her and Mrs. Paschal can have tea together and complain about what a waste millennials are,” Laurent said with a half smile.

Damen shook his head and did as Laurent asked. He knew Miss Daisy wouldn’t say no and she didn’t. Laurent was pleased.

* * *

The following day Laurent was even more excited. He had hired a DJ for the party and he was on his phone arranging the time they would come and set the equipment up as they walked inside the house after coming home from school. Mrs. Paschal was waiting for them at the entrance hallway with several envelopes in her hands. Laurent hung up his phone.

“Damianos,” she said with a slight smile. “You received some mail.” Damen looked perplexed and then Mrs. Paschal handed all the envelopes to him and walked off.

Damen stared at all the envelopes and went through them. “Hmm,” he said. “I remember you helping me with two college applications. Then you started a third and I told you I was going to take a year off and save money to pay my way through college,” Damen said glancing over at Laurent who was standing perfectly still. “There are six envelopes here,” Damen said.

Laurent took a deep breath in and composed himself. “There’s only one that matters,” he said. Damen stared at him and Laurent was sure he had never seen Damen stare at him like that before. Laurent grabbed the envelopes and found it. He picked one out and held it out to Damen with the sweetest smile he could muster. Damen wasn’t smiling.

He grabbed the envelope none the less and looked down at it. “Oh fuck sakes, Laurent!” He said. He was angry. It was obvious. “Why -“

“Open it,” Laurent said.

“No!” Damen said and started walking towards the stairs. Laurent followed after. Damen went into his room and tried to slam the door but Laurent was there, so he just walked in and threw his book bag down. He started to pace. He crumpled up the envelope in his hand and threw it on the ground.

Laurent placed his book bag down and went and picked up the envelope. He smoothed it out. “Open it or I will,” he said.

“Laurent this isn’t a JOKE!” Damen yelled.

Laurent clenched his jaw. He had never seen Damen angry. He wasn’t scared in the sense that Damen would hurt him, but he was scared in a sense that he didn’t want to cause any problems between them. Laurent took a deep breath and thought before he spoke. “Damianos I don’t consider your secondary education a joke. I consider it important. I -“

“Be quiet!” Damen said as he pulled off his jacket and pull over and loosened his tie angrily. He stared at Laurent. “You’re right. It’s not a joke. It’s cruel. It’s cruel that you sent an application to Harvard without my consent. How could you?”

Laurent swallowed. He made sure his voice was steady. “I had all the information I needed and sent it,” he answers truthfully.

Damen shook his head and looked away. His hands were in fists. “You know I can’t afford it,” he said in a harsh whisper.

“I can,” Laurent said.

“I am no CHARITY CASE!” Damen yelled and Laurent actually flinched. Damen felt disgusted with himself for yelling at Laurent. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in and out. “Leave,” he said without looking at Laurent.

Laurent placed the envelope on the bed, picked up his book bag and left, closing the door softly behind him. Damen undressed and changed into some more comfortable clothes. He sat on his bed and leaned his head back on the headboard. He closed his eyes. He felt the hot sting in his eyes and felt the tears slide down his face. He was silent. He had never felt more alone.

* * *

Damen awoke. It was nighttime. He blinked and sat up and it took him a moment to realize Laurent was sitting at the foot of his bed.

“Laurent?” He asked in a groggy voice. Damen rubbed his eyes.

“Yes?” Laurent asked softly.

”What are you doing?” Damen asked and reached for his bedside lamp. Once the light turned on he saw Laurent had brought up a tray of food. 

“I brought you supper,” he said. 

“Thanks,” Damen said and his eyes fell on the crumpled envelope.

Laurent stood up and walked to Damen’s side of the bed. He had changed as well and had his hair up. “May I explain myself?” He asked quietly.

Damen only shrugged. “Go ahead,” he said.

“I am fully aware that you are not a charity case,” Laurent said. “What I was going to do was to offer you a loan.”

Damen furrowed his brow and looked up at Laurent.

“Yes,” Laurent said lifting his chin slightly. “A loan which you will pay back with interest once you start working,” he said. “Harvard has a wonderful Teacher Education Program.”

Damen looked up at Laurent.

“I’m also not just doing this for you!” He said furrowing his brow. Damen stayed silent as he listened to Laurent. “I’m doing it for your future students,” he said. “Any child that will have you as a teacher will be a very lucky child indeed. And good teachers are hard to find, so,” Laurent said. “This has nothing to do with charity. It has everything to do with doing the right thing,” Laurent said. His heart was pounding but his voice had been steady.

Damen stayed silent for what seem liked forever. He took a deep breath in and reached for the crumpled envelope. He looked at it. He held it out to Laurent. “Read it,” he said.

Laurent’s eyes widened as he stepped forward and took it. “You sure?” He asked.

“Well if I don’t get in I can blame it all on you since you did my application,” Damen said.

Laurent rolled his eyes but quickly tore the envelope open. He went and sat beside Damen, who felt his heart pound in spite of himself. Laurent and him locked gazes. Laurent then unfolded the letter.

“Dear mister blah blah blah,” Laurent said in a rushed whisper. “It is with great pleasure that we welcome you to Harvard -“ and Damen then heard nothing more and Laurent threw himself at Damen, knocking him back. “You got in! You got in!” Laurent said.

Damen looked up at him and stared at Laurent’s face. It took him a moment to realize why Laurent looked... different. He had an expression Damen had never seen on him before. He looked so beautiful. He looked as if his face was glowing. It suddenly dawned on Damen, that Laurent had a look of pure joy on his face. Absolute joy. It melted his heart. 

Laurent leaned in and kissed Damen as he held his face. “You got in!” He said again. “Then next year I’ll be there and we can move in together and -“ he put his hands down and the guarded happy look Damen knew all too well appeared. He gave him a close lipped smile. “If you wanted, that is,” Laurent said.

“I want to hear what you want for us,” Damen said.

Laurent shook his head. “Damianos -“

“Laurent,” Damen said and Laurent looked his way. “You put this all into motion. You wanted me at Harvard,” Damen continue while staring Laurent right in the eyes. “You did all this. Now the least you can do is honestly tell me what you want for us, for our future.”

Laurent blinked slowly. He could do this. He could do it. I can do this, he said internally. He cleared his throat and made as if he was going to get up, since in throwing himself on Damen, he had ended up straddling him, but to his surprise Damen placed his hands on Laurent’s hips and stopped him from getting up. It was fine, Laurent didn’t feel caged in. If he had he knew Damen would let him off. 

Laurent closed his eyes and... spoke. “I was hoping maybe when it was time for me to go that we could rent a small home and be together as we studied.” Laurent opened his eyes slowly.

Damen was grinning widely and Laurent blushed. “Define together,” Damen whispered to Laurent.

“Shut up!” He said and before he knew it, Damen was holding him tight and kissing his neck. Laurent felt Damen’s lips along his jaw and then his lips were on Laurent’s lips. It was wonderful. When they pulled apart Laurent was flushed and breathless.

“You’re impossible,” Damen whispered softly.

“And you wouldn’t have it any other way,” Laurent said without missing a beat.

“No,” Damen said tenderly as he ran the tip of his index finger along Laurent’s jaw. “No. I wouldn’t have you any other way. You’re perfection in my eyes,” he told Laurent and Laurent’s heart felt as if it was in his throat.

“Such a flirt,” Laurent said light heartedly.

It was Damen’s turn to grin. “And you wouldn’t have me any other way,” he whispered and kissed Laurent softly again.

* * *

Miss Daisy came Saturday morning and Laurent was happy that Damen was happy again. They had spoken long into the night and Damen had said time and time again that he would pay him back and Laurent said that he knew he would.

“We can set it up like a student loan,” Laurent said. “You make monthly payments when you’re working.”

“Ok,” Damen had said and he swore he would pay Laurent back no matter what.

The preparation for Laurent’s party began and Mrs. Paschal looked around not quite pleased but there wasn’t much she could do. The security detail came and Mrs. Paschal gave them all strict orders to remove any alcohol they saw. Laurent rolled his eyes and Damen grinned. The DJ came and began to set up. Nikandros and Erasmus rolled in on Nik’s truck before everyone. Laurent showed Erasmus upstairs. They were spending the night and on Sunday they were going to have another private gathering, just them four. They would be staying in Damen’s room.

“Damen got his Harvard acceptance letter,” Laurent told Erasmus and Erasmus beamed.

“I got mine too!” Erasmus said.

Laurent grinned at his best friend. “What?!” Laurent said. “I can’t believe you didn’t even call and tell me!”

“I know, I’m sorry I was at Nik’s place and spent the night. I, well, we talked to his dad a great deal,” Erasmus said.

“Oh?” Laurent asked as they walked into Damen’s room. “About?”

Erasmus glanced at Laurent shyly. “Well I got a full scholarship,” Erasmus said. “But I still need to buy books and well I can’t come home every night,” he said.

“Right,” Laurent said.

“So, uh, Nik told his dad he wanted me and him to stay together. Live together. And... and his dad was happy with it. So, that’s that.”

Erasmus was blushing as he looked into Laurent’s eyes. “Erasmus that’s wonderful,” Laurent said. It was. He couldn’t wait until that was he and Damen the year after that.

“Yeah,” Erasmus said grinned. He plopped down on the bed and Laurent sat beside him. “Yeah I just can’t believe it. I’m so happy. My mom was so ecstatic,” he said.

“I bet,” Laurent said happily.

“I can’t wait till you’re there next year,” he said. “Nik said this was the only year Damen and he could spend together. Oh! Nik wants to get a place big enough for Damen to stay with us for at least this year. I’m sure next year you two will want a place of your own. Oh Laurent, I hope we can see each other often. I’ve never been away from you for much time!” He said taking Laurent’s hand.

“Hey! No sadness allowed. Everyone got into Harvard and it’s my birthday weekend. We’re having fun!” Laurent said and Erasmus laughed.

They went back downstairs and Laurent saw Damen and Nik laughing and watching as the staff set up the food. Damen glanced over at Laurent and suddenly winked at him and Laurent melted. He held back his grin as he and Erasmus walked closer to the pair.

Laurent slowed and looked at Erasmus while they were still out of hearing range from Nik and Damen. “I’m sure you’ll see me more often than no,” Laurent said. He felt his heart thumping a bit. “I mean, Damen is my boyfriend and we won’t to be apart for more than a week.”

“Of course,” Erasmus said giggling. Laurent let himself smile and they walked over and to Damen and Nikandros.


	27. XXVII

The party had been great and no one had gotten too rowdy. Sunday has been spent with Nikandros and Erasmus, who had stayed over Saturday night. Laurent had beaten Nikandros at several games on the Switch and he enjoyed the growing frustration in him.

“Oh, come on,” Laurent had said. He had turned to Erasmus. “Just -“

“Sshh!” Erasmus had said and Laurent had turned and grinned at Damen.

Damen had grinned back. Laurent looked so happy. Youthful and free and happy. He looked perfect. 

It was now Monday and as promised, Damen had stayed home with Laurent. Mrs. Paschal has contacted the school to report their absences. She hadn’t asked anything else when Laurent had told her it was his birthday and they were staying home.

The sun was rising and Laurent blinked his eyes. Damen was sleeping peacefully beside him. They had only held each other last night. Nothing else. Laurent loved this about Damen, he gave him room to breath. It felt good. It was Laurent’s birthday. He was seventeen. For the next several weeks he and Damen would be the same age. He liked that. Equals.

Damen stirred and made a lovely sound as he stretched. He turned to his side, facing Laurent. Laurent felt at peace. He watched Damen as he slowly woke up. He blinked a few times and when his eyes focused on Laurent, he smiled.

“Happy Birthday,” Damen said, sitting up and grinning.

“Thank you,” Laurent said. “We’re the same age now,” Laurent said.

“Yeah,” Damen said grinning. “Can I give you your birthday present?” He asked.

Laurent furrowed his brow. His heart began to pound. “Ok,” he whispered. He hadn’t thought Damen would give him anything which was fine with him. Damen had given him so much already.

Damen got up and went into his closet and came back with a wrapped box. It felt heavy. Laurent unwrapped it and then opened up the box inside. It was journals. Three of them. He looked up at Damen. He took them out and saw they had famous paintings on them. The Birth of Venus. The Scream. The Mona Lisa.

“Journals,” Laurent said.

Damen smiled shyly. “That morning in the Hamptons,” he said softly. Laurent stared at him. “I know you were just playing but,” he sighed and closed his eyes. Laurent’s heart was pounding. “The way the sun hit your golden hair and the things you said.” He let out a breath. “I like to imagine you meant all that.”

“I did mean all that,” Laurent said. Damen was the one staring now. “Can’t you tell?” Laurent asked softly. “I mean, I... I have a hard time showing it but.. I.. “

Laurent had to stop. His heart was racing. His hands shaking. He stared down at them. He clenched then into fists. Damen reached over and wrapped his hands about Laurent’s fists. After a moment Laurent opened his fists up and they laced their fingers together.

“Laurent,” Damen whispered. Laurent looked up at him. “I lo-“

“No!” Laurent said panicked. “Don’t. Don’t. It’s too much!” He was breathing hard.

Damen stayed still and calm. “Ok,” he said and smiled. He picked up one of the journals and held it up. It was the one with The Scream on it. “When I push you too hard, write on this one!” He said with an easy smile.

Laurent was still and part of him actually wanted to laugh. His heart was still pounding but Damen’s silly comment had taken his mind off it. Laurent made a sound, that was sort of like a laugh and then Damen was beside him and his strong arms squeezed him.

“I figured they could represent moods. The Scream when your angry. The Mona Lisa when your playful and The Birth of Venus when you write poetry.”

Laurent furrowed his brow. “How do you know?” Laurent asked.

“Erasmus told me,” Damen said.

Laurent almost forgot about his pounding heart, which was calming down without him realizing it. “When?”

“He mentioned it yesterday. He got you a book of poetry. I asked him later what made him get it and he just said you wrote it and really enjoyed it.”

Laurent was calmer now. His hands were no longer shaking and his heart almost back to normal. His throat was dry thought. Laurent coughed and Damen reached for a water bottle on his night stand and handed it to Laurent. “Thank you,” Laurent said softly after he had drunk half the bottle.

Damen nodded and gave him another sweet smile. Laurent felt guilt ribbon through him. Damen was a wonderful person. A patient and kind and wonderful person and Laurent felt he didn’t deserve him. His patience. His affection. Laurent was so not worthy of it all. Damen should be with someone who didn’t freak out over such simple things.

“There’s another part to your birthday present and maybe it’s not the best time to tell you but I want to tell you,” Damen said.

“What is it?” Laurent asked. 

Damen blushed a wonderful shade of pink and Laurent’s eyes widened in surprise. “So,” Damen said and leaned back on the headboard of the bed. “So I was wondering if maybe, since it’s your birthday. Your day,” he whispered. “I was wondering if you’d like to make love to me.”

“What?” Laurent asked, stunned.

Damen blushed even deeper. His ears were red. “Ah, well. It’s your birthday. Your day. And we’re equals. I know I normally... you know.” Laurent nodded. “So, I just thought I’d ask.”

“Do you want me to?” Laurent asked him.

Damen raised his eye brows. “You’d be my first,” he said.

“That’s not what I asked,” Laurent said.

Damen shrugged. “I mean -“

“Damen,” Laurent said. Damen looked into Laurent’s eyes. “We do what we want. What we’re safe with doing, what we want to do.”

“Yeah,” Damen said. 

“I wouldn’t want you to ever offer something if you don’t want to do it just because you thought I’d want it,” Laurent said. The thought of Damen offering something just because he thought Laurent wanted it but he didn’t, made Laurent feel a bit... ill.

“Oh I know!” Damen said sitting up straight. “Oh Laurent, no, it isn’t that. No!” Damen said and he chuckled. Laurent felt a little better. “Ah.. it’s nerve wrecking,” Damen said. “But I want you to know, I’m willing. My own choice. Ok?”

“Ok,” Laurent said. “But what we’ve been doing has been working so far,” Laurent said shrugging.

Damen chuckled. “It’s beyond good,” he said and Laurent looked at him. Damen leaned in and kissed him. “Well, ah... I’m a crappy boyfriend huh?” Damen asked.

“What?!” Laurent said. “No! You’re an amazing boyfriend. A thoughtful and kind and sweet and generous boyfriend. You’re the best!” Laurent said. Damen looked stricken. “What?” Laurent asked.

“You actually called me boyfriend!” Damen said softly.

Laurent realized he had. “Yeah and?” Laurent said as if nothing. He tried to ignore the huge grin on Damen’s face. “It’s my birthday I can say whatever the fuck I want!” Laurent said.

“Yes, you can,” Damen said with a huge grin on his face. “Boyfriend.”

* * *

They had gotten up and had breakfast and then they had sat on the couch and Laurent had watched some American Horror Story. They had salads for lunch and they then made their way upstairs. Damen was going to take Laurent out for dinner.

“What should I wear?” Laurent asked.

“Clothes,” Damen said.

Laurent rolled his eyes. Damen chuckled. “Damen! Is it like a jeans kind of place or what?”

“Yes, Boyfriend. It’s a jeans type of place,” Damen said. Laurent turned away from Damen and grinned. “Did you just turn your back to me and grin?” Damen asked.

“What kind of question is that?” Laurent asked rolling his eyes and grabbing a black turtleneck.

“The kind I ask when I want to know if you’re hiding how much you like the fact that I’m calling you boyfriend but you don’t want me to know because you’ve always rolled your eyes and told me not to call you that for weeks.”

“You’re impossible!” Lauren said as he walked to his dresser to get some socks.

He was halfway there when Damen grabbed him round the waist. Laurent laughed as Damen kissed his neck. He felt Damen slide his hand in his hair and sweeping it over his neck and behind his shoulder. He looked down at Laurent. “You are so incredibly handsome, Laurent,” Damen said with a soft smile.

Laurent felt butterflies in his stomach. Damen leaned down and kissed him and Laurent slid his arms around his neck and slid his hand into Damen’s hair. They kissed and Laurent moaned into Damen’s lips. Even Laurent was surprised at this, but the surprise passed and he decided to just let himself go.

They kissed and walked to the bed and climbed on it. Laurent quickly took off his shirt and slipped off his pants and looked at Damen, his eyes wandering over Damen’s tanned, muscular body as he undressed just as quickly. He was suddenly only top of Laurent, Laurent wrapped his legs around Damen and lifted his hips to him. He was already hard. Damen’s hands were ceaseless across Laurent’s sensitive skin.

Laurent moaned and breathed out and closed his eyes. Damen’s hands felt incredible. He felt Damen still and he opened his eyes and looked up at him. “Did you.. did you want to...”

Laurent knew what he was asking and thought about it for a moment.

He looked back up into Damen’s eyes. “Not yet,” Laurent whispered and kisses Damen’s lips. He turned onto his stomach and bent his knees, rubbing his ass on Damen’s hard on. He heard Damen’s groan right behind his ear and felt as Damen gently kissed from the side of his neck to the back of it and down. His lips were soft and tender and they felt incredible.

Laurent felt Damen’s left hand slide down the side of his body and clasp his hip in a gentle way. Laurent put his hand on top of Damen’s. “You’re so gorgeous,” Damen said breathlessly. Laurent moaned back and felt as Damen got off the bed and got a condom and lube. He got back in bed again, behind Laurent.

He started kissing Laurent’s back again. He ran his hands up and down the side of his thighs and gently kissed across the small of his back. He gently slid in, moaning and flooded with feelings and ecstasy. “Laurent,” Damen whispered softly as he slowly started moving in and out of him. He moaned softly as pleasure washed over him. Laurent’s body was the most beautiful thing Damen had ever seen, touched, tasted, smelled. He cherished it in every way and Laurent felt it in the way Damen made love to him. 

Damen slid his right arm across Laurent’s chest and curled it around his left shoulder, his chest against Laurent’s back, the warmth of Damen’s body warming him. He closed his eyes and hung his head as Damen lovingly moved in and out of him.

Damen was wrapped up in his feelings and emotions, everything he felt for Laurent. Damen closed his eyes as he kissed between Laurent’s shoulder blades. He was immersed in the bliss of being inside of Laurent. In the euphoric sensation of being together. “I love you,” Damen whispered with a moan.

Laurent’s eyes flew open and he stilled as he heard Damen. His breath escaped him.

“I love you,” Damen repeated. “I love you.”

Laurent didn’t answer and if Damen felt the stillness of Laurent he didn’t show it. Damen kept making love to him, kissing him sweetly and moaning softly. His warm body taking pleasure in Laurent and pleasing him tenderly in return. Laurent closed his eyes again and soon enough he was lost in the wonderful sensations Damen was making him feel. Nothing could get in the way of this at the moment.

* * *

They were driving in silence a couple of hours later. After they had laid in bed for a while, they had gotten up and showered and dressed and Damen had taken the car keys and now they were on their way to dinner.

Neither Lauren nor Damen had mentioned what had been said earlier and Damen was his normal, cheery self. Laurent had hoped he wasn’t upset in any way since Laurent had not said it back. Laurent didn’t know where Damen was taking him. Finally they pulled into a parking lot and Laurent looked out. It was a Mediterranean restaurant. Laurent had never been here.

They walked inside and got a table. “I love this place,” Damen said. “I haven’t been here in a while and I thought it would be nice to come here with you.”

Laurent nodded. He understood. “You must have come here with your dad.”

“Yeah,” Damen said smiling softly. “Every single Friday.” He grinned. “We had an order to our dinners,” Damen said, chuckling at the memory. “Meat Mondays, Taco Tuesdays, Weird Wednesdays.”

“Weird Wednesdays?” Laurent asked laughing.

“It meant if I wanted to eat a can of whipped cream for dinner I was eating it!” Damen said and they both laughed. “Fridays were Free Fridays which meant dad didn’t have to cook so we went out to eat and nine out of ten times we ended up here.”

Laurent smiled warmly and patted Damen’s hand. “Well I’m glad that we’re here together,” he said.

“Me too,” Damen whispered.

A waiter came and they were given water and menus and Laurent asked about the food. Damen’s dad was Greek although Damen had never been, but he knew a good deal of the cuisine. They ordered and after a short while they were served. The food smelled delicious when it arrived.

They were about half way through the meal when Laurent felt he needed to get what he wanted off his chest. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. 

Damen looked confused. “What? Why?”

“For not saying it back,” he said, looking down at his food.

“Oh it’s ok,” Damen said.

Laurent looked up surprised. “It’s ok?” He asked and it was obvious he didn’t believe Damen.

“Yes,” Damen said looking into his blue eyes. “I know you didn’t want me to say it but, I was saying it for me really. I feel it and I wanted you to know. Now you know. I didn’t say it to hear it back.”

Laurent was sat frozen with surprise. “That’s extremely mature, even for you Damianos. We are only 17.”

Damen grinned. “Maybe,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. A playful smile spread across his lips. “Or maybe you don’t need to say it because you show it so much. So I already know.”

Laurent let out a surprised huff of breath. “What?” He asked.

Damen chuckled. “It’s obvious Laurent. You love me. I see it. I feel it. I know it.” Laurent felt his face warm. “It’s beautiful and amazing and it makes me giddy and... and...” he trailed off and Laurent saw his face. His expression was one of joy. “It’s ok. You’ll say it when you’re ready. Tomorrow. Next year. Ten years from now.”

Laurent looked into Damen’s brown eyes. He couldn’t look away.

Damen’s expression softened. “Sometimes things aren’t said but they’re felt. I feel it. That’s all I need.”

Laurent nodded and went back to his food. They ate in silence a while more. Laurent again thought he didn’t deserve this. He was only 17 and he had already come across this. He glanced up at Damen and he wondered how long Damen would be this patient and this kind before he got tired of him.

Damen looked up at Laurent. “Happy Birthday,” he said.

“Thank you,” Laurent answered him.

“I hope it’s been a good one.”

“It’s been the best,” Laurent said smiling. 


	28. XXVIII

It was the day after Laurent’s birthday. He was back at school and he sat beside Erasmus at lunch. “He told me he loved me,” Laurent whispered softly. 

Erasmus glanced up at Laurent and saw the sadness in his friend’s eyes. “Why does it make you sad?”

“Because I couldn’t say it back.”

“Why?”

“Because...” Laurent stayed quiet. He simply shook his head. Erasmus didn’t push the subject. They sat in silence for a while.

“You know that Florence and the Machine song, Heavy In Your Arms?” Laurent asked. Erasmus nodded. “That’s how I feel at times,” Laurent continued. “My love has concrete feet, my love's an iron ball wrapped around your ankles over the waterfall,” Laurent said quoting the song’s lyrics.

“I’m sure he doesn’t see it that way,” Erasmus said with a sweet smile.

“I’m sure he doesn’t,” Laurent agreed. He took a deep breath in. “Maybe if I wasn’t so selfish I would let him go.”

Erasmus looked surprised. “You would break his heart,” he whispered.

“But only for a moment,” Laurent stared and Erasmus saw he had his neutral expression back on. He was showing no emotion. “Then the pain would pass and he would meet someone new in no time and he would see how much more stress free his life would be without me.”

“And what about you, Laurent?” Erasmus asked. “You would be heart broken too. I can tell you’re in love with him, even if you’re not ready to say it out loud.”

Laurent didn’t react to his best friends words even though they were a hundred percent true. He pondered a moment how to answer this and then decided to just go with a truth he had decided on a while ago. “Some people are just not meant to happy.” Laurent shrugged. “Maybe I’m one of them.”

* * *

A couple of weeks after Laurent’s birthday was Spring Break. Nikandros had begged his parents to letting him, Erasmus, Damen and Laurent spend the week at his family’s home in the Hamptons unsupervised and that had been met with a stern no from his father. After a lot of back and forth, they were given permission when Auguste called Nik’s father and told him he and Ada would be spending the week there as well.

Laurent was actually looking forward to the week. He hadn’t seen his brother since January and he missed him. Laurent called his brother as he and Damen pulled out of Laurent’s home and started making their way to the Hamptons.

“Hello?”

“Hey,” Laurent said. “Just calling to tell you we’re on our way.”

“Ok, Ada and I will be leaving soon,” Auguste said and Laurent furrowed his brow. His brother sounded slightly stressed.

“You alright?” Laurent asked.

“Yeah! See you soon brother.”

“Ok,” Laurent said and hung up.

* * *

Laurent was pensive his whole drive to the Hamptons but he didn’t want to show it. He played music and engaged Damen in conversation but by the time they arrived, Laurent was sure something was the matter.

Auguste and Ada arrived not long after and there was chatter as everyone greeted everyone else. It was early evening and Nik and Damen said they wanted to grill some burgers for dinner. Laurent finally pulled Auguste to the side.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

“What do you mean?” Auguste said not meeting Laurent’s eyes.

“You’re a horrible liar and I’m amazing at picking up body language. Now tell me what’s wrong.”

Auguste clenched his jaw. “A police officer came to my home yesterday,” Auguste said softly.

Laurent was frozen. “Is uncle dead?”

“I don’t know,” Auguste replied looking into his brother’s eyes. “But they were looking for him.”

Laurent’s heart started to pound. “Why?”

Auguste swallowed. “They arrested a guy in Connecticut last year. Child porn. Apparently he was a doctor. Well known. The cop said he also traveled to other countries to meet children to...”

“Yup! I get it. Go on,” Laurent said, emotionless.

“Well, whoever set up the trips and meetings had a client list and -“

“And uncle was a client,” Laurent stated. “Someone tipped him off. It’s why he ran.”

“That’s what the cop thinks,” Auguste said.

“Will this affect the business?” Laurent asked.

“I...” Auguste rubbed his face with his hands. “Technically uncle is not involved in the hotels anymore,” Auguste stated. “I think though, if... if he is ever caught, arrested, charged with something like...”

“Rape of a child,” Laurent said without emotion.

Auguste nodded. “I think we would have to make a statement, to let the public know he is no longer part of De Vere Hotels.”

Laurent felt as if a cold bucket of water had been poured on him. The public. Everyone. Everyone would know. Laurent let out a shaky breath. “If he’s arrested it’ll be all over the news.”

Auguste nodded. “Should we tell Jord?”

Laurent stood still. He pushed his panic down. He had to think. He had to think. What would he do if he was in charge? He stood up straight. He _was_ in charge. This was his business. “I can call Jord, in the meantime,” Laurent said and stared right into Auguste’s eyes. “You need to get on the cover of People magazine or something.”

“What?!” Auguste said.

“You need to give an exclusive interview to someone. We always get calls from the media around the time of dad’s death. Always. This year you’re giving someone an exclusive and you’re going to tell them you’re my guardian because sadly uncle abandoned us.”

Auguste eyes widened. “Laurent, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“It is. Discuss it with your lawyer. I want the public to know he is no longer a part of our lives so when he gets arrested people won’t assume we’re close to him. I want people to know he hasn’t been a part of our lives or the business since the beginning of the year. Tell them he’s gone and he’s the one that left and we don’t hear from him. It’s the truth, after all.”

Laurent could see his words were sinking into Auguste. “Ok,” he said softly.

“Did the police officer leave you a card?” Laurent asked. Auguste took his wallet out and handed the card to Laurent. Laurent took a picture of it with his phone and then stared down at it. Makedon. Interpol. He handed the card back to his brother.

“You’re just like dad,” Auguste said.

Laurent looked into his brother’s eyes. “What?”

“You. You’re just like dad. You just take charge and try to keep everything under your control.”

“I don’t remember that about him,” Laurent said slipping his phone back into his pocket.

“I know you don’t,” Auguste said. “I’m sorry.”

* * *

“You wanna tell me what’s on your mind?” Damen asked, bringing Laurent out of his thoughts. He looked at up at Damen.

“Ah... how awesome your burgers were,” Laurent said with a smile.

“You didn’t even finish the one I made you,” Damen said.

Laurent closed his eyes and sighed. He was sitting at the edge of the bed in the guest room he and Damen were sharing. Laurent had stared at the picture he had taken of the card the cop had handed Auguste until he had memorized the phone number. He had googled it and saw it was an area code from France. “I’m sorry,” he said.

Damen froze halfway through pulling his shirt off. He stared at Laurent. “What’s wrong?” Damen asked and Laurent saw the concern in his face and it almost made Laurent sick.

“You should really shower before bed,” Laurent said almost dismissively. “You smell like charcoal and burger. It’s all in your hair.”

Damen furrowed his brow and nodded. Laurent had seen how his dismissive tone had hurt Damen’s feelings. Damen grabbed a towel from their overnight bag and walked out of their room shirtless.

* * *

Laurent had changed while Damen was showering. He put on his sleep shorts and had turned off the overhead light. He had turned on the bedside lamp beside Damen’s side of the bed. He had put his phone to charge, as well as Damen’s. He had put the lube and a couple of condoms beside Damen’s phone where they wouldn’t be missed. He was sitting in bed, covers wrapped around his waist. The door opened and Damen walked in. Laurent sat up straight.

Damen froze for a second as he saw the darkened room and Laurent shirtless on the bed. He stepped in. He had the towel wrapped around his waist. He threw his jeans and boxers on a chair close to the door. Laurent watched as he walked to their overnight bag. “Oh, you don’t -“ Laurent began. Damen stopped and looked at him. “I mean, you can just come to bed naked,” Laurent said softly giving Damen a smile. 

Damen nodded and walked over to the bed. Laurent saw him glance at his phone and condoms and lube. He didn’t look happy and Laurent knew why but he knew Damen and he knew he would fix it. He would be honest, partly, and then they could have sex, which Laurent really wanted to, and everything would be ok.

Damen got to his side of the bed and Laurent looked up at him. His hair was still dripping slightly. Laurent pushed the covers off and crossed the bed, grabbing Damen’s towel, exposing his naked body. 

“Come here,” he said. “Your hair is still a bit damn. If you fall sleep with it like that, you’ll get a headache.”

Damen crawled to him on the bed and sat back on his heels. Laurent crawled behind home, getting up on his knees and began to gently dry Damen’s hair. He leaned down and kissed Damen’s left muscular shoulder.

“I’m sorry, there is something on my mind,” Laurent said softly. 

Damen turned to him. “You can tell me. You can talk to me,” Damen said, the supplication in his voice was raw and Laurent’s heart could hardly stand it. 

Laurent closed his eyes. Maybe he could tell Damen everything. Although when it had been uncovered by Auguste, it had been a shock, there was now almost a feeling of slight relief in him knowing. Maybe Damen would also be as understanding... Damen was kind and he didn’t judge and...

No.

No.

Damen could never know. How would he feel knowing the only other man that Laurent had... Laurent shook his head. 

“Oh I know I can tell you,” Laurent said. “I, yes, I’d like to tell you.” 

Damen nodded and turned to Laurent. He pulled the towel around his neck. “What is it?”

Laurent bent his right knee, foot flat in the bed and pulled it to his chest, placing his chin on it. “Every year around the anniversary of my father’s death we get phone calls from magazines and newspapers asking us how we’re doing,” Laurent began. “Asking about Auguste and I. Asking for an interview. I’m sure the story of the two little orphaned rich boys sells.” Laurent gave Damen a tight smile.

“Ok,” Damen said softly.

“Well, I told Auguste this year he should give an interview.”

Damen furrowed his brow. “You did?” Laurent nodded. “Why?”

“So he could let the public know Uncle is gone and no longer a part of our lives.”

Damen looked puzzled. “Why does the public need to know that?” 

“If the public knows it means he’ll hear about it. I want him to know how happy we are without him,” Laurent said and even he was taken aback at how emotional his voice sounded. 

Damen looked at Laurent and the concern in his eyes was visible. “I’m sorry, baby,” he said softly. 

“Don’t apologize,” Laurent said. 

“Well I know he’s hurt you and it wasn’t fair what he did -“

“Stop!” Laurent said. Damen froze. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” Laurent hadn’t been ready for Damen’s words.

Damen nodded and reached for Laurent’s left hand. “Ok,” was all he said. “Ready to sleep?”

Laurent looked at him a bit surprised. “Are you?”

Damen shrugged. “Whatever you want.” Laurent stayed quiet. “I was hurt because I knew something was going on and I knew you weren’t telling me,” Damen said. “I hope you don’t think that if I’m hurt by something, implying we can have sex is a way to fix it. I wanted you to talk to me and we talked. Sex is completely separate from this.”

Laurent sat still. He nodded after a while. “Right,” he said.

“Sex isn’t used to bribe someone into being happier,” Damen said softly.

“Right,” Laurent said, feeling his cheeks warm. He suddenly felt childish. He turned away from Damen.

“What’s wrong?” Damen asked.

“Nothing,” Laurent said. He hated how foolish he felt.

“Are you upset by what I said?” Damen asked.

“No,” Laurent said offhandedly. “No, I’m sure all seventeen year olds give their significant other speeches about the proper etiquette of when to suggest and not suggest sex.”

“Laurent, it’s not what I meant.” 

“No of course not. You’re a saint with a heart of gold and you never mean anything wrong and poor you, fucking someone who doesn’t know when sex is and isn’t acceptable.”

“That’s not -“

“What DID you mean, Damen?” Laurent asked, suddenly angry. “I think we have established that my consent is important to you but why do you questions when I just act like a horny 17 year old?”

“Because we both know -“ Damen stopped abruptly.

Laurent stared at him. “We both know what?”

“We both know sex isn’t simple for you.”

Laurent’s heart thumped in his chest. He nodded. “I remember someone saying they weren’t a charity case,” Laurent said. “I’m not one either.” 

“What the hell does that mean?” Damen asked sounding angry as well. 

“Well, I’m sure fucking the poor fucked up boy who struggles with sex must make you feel really good! It must really stroke your ego.”

“What?!” Damen said staring at Laurent. “Don’t you know how much I want you? Don’t you not feel it?” 

Laurent turned away again. Yes he felt it. His brain was a mess. All this shit about his uncle and then Damen wanting to know. And Laurent wanting to tell him but careful to not tell him too much and then the cherry on top, Damen giving him a little condescending speech about if someone it hurt, sex is not the answer. Well it had been the answer for Laurent a couple of times before. Laurent suddenly thought he must be more fucked up then even he realized. Laurent wished his mind would stop. He felt overwhelmed.

“Laurent,” Damen began and Laurent felt another heartfelt speech coming and he couldn’t take it right now. 

“Shut up!” Laurent said and he heard how shaky his voice was. He felt the bed dip where Damen got off it to come and kneel in front of him. 

“I’m sorry,” he said and Laurent rolled his eyes. Of course Damen was sorry. Damen was just perfect in every way. Always knew what to say and do and even thought he had been through some hardships he was still emotionally stable. Laurent couldn’t quite take it at the moment.

He turned away from Damen. “You would be so much better off without me,” Laurent said without thinking. Or maybe he was thinking too much. His mind wouldn’t stop racing.

“Don’t say that!” Damen said.

“Well it’s the truth! I’m sure you would be much better off with someone who didn’t need to be told when sex is appropriate and when it isn’t.”

“Oh fuck sakes, Laurent! I just wanted to make sure that -“

And before he knew what he was doing Laurent turned to punch Damen, like he had before when they had come back from the Hamptons. He wanted Damen to just shut up. But this time Damen caught his wrists. Laurent yanked his hand away. He felt hot tears sting.

“I love you,” Damen said.

“Shut up,” Laurent replied.

“I do. You know I do.”

“I know you’re a stupid 17 year old that doesn’t know any better,” Laurent said venomously.

“And what are you?” Damen asked.

Laurent turned to face him. “I’ve been through more.”

“I never said you hadn’t been! Why are you fighting me? I’m on your side!”

Laurent shut his eyes. His brain was still a mess and a bunch of jumbled thoughts. He pulled his knees to his chest. He laid his forehead on his knees and mentally recited the phone number he had just learned over and over again until that was all his brain was focused on. Until everything else quieted down.

Laurent wasn’t sure how long he did this for. When his brain stopped racing, he opened his eyes and looked up and found Damen sitting at the foot of the bed looking at him. He had pulled jogging pants on. Laurent lowered his knees and watched as Damen crawled towards him.

Laurent took a deep breath in and out. This he still wasn’t used to. Having Damen see him like this. Laurent wandered if it would always be like this. Passing as normal until the shadow of his uncle and what he had done creeped up on him and suddenly his brain went haywire.

He looked at Damen who gave him a soft smile. “I never meant to upset you,” Damen said. His hair was dry, Laurent noticed. 

Laurent was finally calm enough to just nod and let things be. “It’s alright,” he said hoarsely. His throat was dry. 

“I’ll go get you some water,” Damen said and Laurent watched as he got off the bed and walked out the door. He wasn’t gone long. He returned and gave Laurent the bottle of water he had brought.

Laurent drank it quickly. He wiped his mouth and looked at Damen. “I’m fine,” he said, furrowing his brow. He didn’t want that sort of attention from Damen. Inquisitive looks to see if he was really ok.

“Ok,” Damen replied and looked away from Laurent.

“Kiss me,” Laurent said suddenly. He looked at Damen and for a moment worried that he would say it wasn’t the right time. But Damen leaned in and kissed him. Hard. Pushing him down on the bed. Their mouths open and tongues danced between their lips. It felt amazing. Laurent was left panting on his back when Damen pulled up for air.

“You must know how much I want you,” Damen said staring into Laurent’s eyes with a look that made Laurent feel weak.

“Show me,” Laurent whispered and Damen leaned down and kissed him again.


	29. XXIX

After spring break, school intensified in preparation for the end of the school year and exams. For seniors there was also the preparation for graduation... and prom.

“You’re going with me,” Damen said as he grabbed a flyer off the wall and looked at it as he and Laurent walked to their PE class.

Laurent furrowed his brow. “It didn’t sound like you were asking.”

“Because I wasn’t,” Damen said glancing at him.

“That’s so not romantic!” Laurent said. 

Damen chuckled. The hallway was bustling with students. He took Laurent’s hands in his. “Laurent De Vere, would you please do me the honor of coming to prom with me? It would make me the happiest high school senior ever.”

Laurent smiled and waited a dramatic couple of seconds. “Yes,” he said simply.

“Good!” Damen said and leaned in to kiss him.

* * *

A few weeks later Laurent and Damen sat on Damen’s bed. Laurent was quizzing him, preparing him for one of his exams. They decided to take a break.

“Oh you have to turn in the form tomorrow, letting the school know who’s coming to your graduation ceremony.”

“Yeah I put you and Miss Daisy,” Damen said, reaching for it and handing it to Laurent.

Laurent looked it over. “Oh and at lunch I went and paid for our tickets for prom,” he told Damen.

Damen sat up quickly. “What?! I was going to do that!”

Laurent looked at him. “You were?”

“Yes! It’s my prom! I asked you, remember? It was my responsibility to pay for the tickets.”

“It’s no big deal,” Laurent said. “Plus the tickets are $85 each, Damen.”

“Yes I know!” Damen said. He shook his head and got up. He walked to his closet and walked out with the smaller back pack he had come to the house with. He took out his wallet and Laurent saw him count out money. “Here,” he said.

“No,” Laurent told him. 

“Laurent! Take the money!”

“No. No need to.”

“Laurent!” Damen said and Laurent saw there was no point in fighting it so he took it. He figured he could sneak back in soon enough and put the money back in Damen’s wallet.

* * *

Erasmus and Laurent went out to look for suits together. Nik and Damen had been easy as they were were wearing plain tuxes but Laurent wanted something different as did Erasmus.

“So does Nik still enjoy taking it?” Laurent asked teasing.

Erasmus smacked his arm. “Don’t make me regret telling you.”

“Can’t take it back now!” Laurent said laughing. He looked at Erasmus. “Damen offered for my birthday,” he said.

Erasmus’s eyes widened in surprise. “He offered? You didn’t take him up on the offer?” He asked. Laurent shook his head. “Why not?”

“Don’t know,” Laurent said. He looked at Erasmus who was watching him. “Not ready,” He said.

“Ok,” Erasmus replied. He didn’t ask any questions. He let Laurent be.

* * *

Laurent looked at himself. He couldn’t believe he was... nervous. The theme of prom had been A Fairy Tale Night and so he wished to go as a prince. He looked back at Erasmus. He was in an all cream suit and looked wonderful. He had braided Laurent’s hair into a French braid and Laurent had placed a golden circlet on his head. He looked at his clothing.

He was wearing a navy blue jacket and pants. He had a thin white shirt underneath with ruffly sleeves which stuck out of the bottom of the gorgeous navy blue jacket that laced up the wrists to the elbows and up the middle to the high neck. The laces on the jacket were golden. The pants had black laces. There was golden detailing on the jacket and the sides of the pants. He finished the look by wearing shiny black knee high riding boots. 

“You look like you belong in a fairy tale,” Erasmus had said. Laurent had smiled.

* * *

Any reservations Laurent had had for his clothing choice for prom were erased when Damen saw him. Damen looked amazing in his classic black and white tux. His wavy hair had been pulled back in a sleek bun. He looked incredible. Nikandros and Erasmus to made a lovely pair as well.

They rode to prom. Although Laurent had said nothing, he knew it was Damen’s birthday the following day. He would be 18. There were only two weeks of school left after tonight and then that would be it for Damen.

Laurent secretly wondered what it would truly be like without Damen with him everyday. He didn’t want to think about it. They still had the whole summer and Laurent wanted to enjoy every day of it. 

They arrived at the venue. There was valet parking and once all four friends had exited their cars they walked inside. In the lobby was the area for photos. Laurent was pleased when he felt Damen wrap his arm around him and place a hand on his lower back.

“You look amazing,” Damen said.

You make me feel amazing, Laurent wanted to say but he only smiled and leaned into Damen. Tonight was supposed to be a fairy tale come true so Laurent was going to enjoy it.

* * *

While at prom, Laurent kept a close eye on the time. He and Damen weren’t going to be there when the clock struck midnight. They were going to be alone. Laurent wanted Damen’s birthday to be special and a celebration just for them. They left at 11 pm. Damen hugged Nik and Laurent hugged Erasmus.

“Have fun,” Erasmus whispered in his ear.

“We will,” Laurent whispered back.

Laurent grabbed the car keys from the valet when the car had been brought up. Damen looked at him in surprise. They climbed inside. 

“Did you think I’d forget tomorrow was your birthday?” Laurent asked.

Damen looked shocked for about two seconds. He then chuckled and turned his head. “No,” he said, grinning.

“Good. We’re going to celebrate it,” Laurent said. “You and I.”

Damen laughed and looked out as they drove off. “Where and how?”

“That’s for me to know and you to find out,” Laurent said with a grin of his own. 

Damen knew where they were going once they were on the freeway. “Your hotel,” he said nodding.

“Since it’s mine, when I tell the kitchen staff I want something at a certain time, no matter what time, it’s done for me. Sorta makes me never want to go to another hotel,” Laurent said.

Damen chuckled and shook his head. “So I’m assuming there’s a bag packed and in the trunk?”

“No. You would have seen that. I had a bag brought to the hotel room I reserved a couple of days ago.”

“Of course!” Damen said chuckling. He turned to Laurent. “Thank you,” he said.

“For what? Celebrating your birthday? Everyone deserves it. I would have had a huge party but I had the feeling you’d say no.”

“Yes, I would have said no. And god knows I don’t want Auguste to gray prematurely because of me!”

It was Laurent’s turn to laugh.

Once they were at the entrance of the hotel room, Laurent stopped and turned to Damen.

“Close your eyes!” He said. 

Damen looked down at Laurent’s face. His hair was swept back into his French braid and he still wore the golden circlet on his head. He probably had already forgotten he has it on, Damen thought. His face was beautiful with the big smile he had on it. 

“You look every bit a fairy tale prince, Laurent,” Damen said.

Laurent blinked and looked surprised. He blushed a bit. “Thank you,” he said. “But this isn’t about you! Close your eyes. 

So Damen did. He felt as Laurent took his hand and heard the hotel room door open. Laurent guided him inside and the door closed behind him. He walked blindly until Laurent stopped him.

“Ok, open your eyes,” Laurent whispered.

Damen did so and stood frozen for a moment. It was the same room they had been to before. The one they had had their first time in. This time there were rose petals on the bed and on the floor surrounding the bed. There was a trolley with a small round cake on it with two candles, a 1 and an 8. Damen was speechless. He looked at Laurent who had take a few steps back to gage his reaction. He saw the expectancy on his face and it melted Damen’s heart.

“Wow, Laurent,” He said when he finally found his voice. “This is the most romantic thing I’ve ever seen.”

Laurent grinned and looked very pleased with himself. “Good.”

Damen walked over and embraced his. “But the best part about this is you. I get to be with you.”

Laurent tilted his face up to Damen and kissed him. He wanted Damen to have a wonderful birthday. Their kissing became deeper and Laurent pulled back.

“I...” he swallowed and looked at Damen. “I want us to shower together.”

“Oh? Now?” Damen asked.

Laurent nodded. He reached for Damen’s tie and pulled it off. He unbutton his suit and slid it off, his hands caressing Damen’s shoulder over his white button up shirt. Damen let him continue. He untucked and unbuttoned the shirt, unbuttoning the sleeves and then slid it off. Laurent looked over Damen’s body. He ran his hands on top of Damen’s undershirt and down. Laurent grabbed the hem and pulled it up and over Damen’s outstretched arms. Laurent looked at Damen’s bare chest.

Damen saw Laurent’s eyes darken and his pulse quicken. Damen reached around Lauren and started undoing his braid. He ran his fingers gently through his long golden hair. Once it was done, he began undoing the laces on the sleeves. Then the laces up the front of the jacket. He was delicate about it. Finally he pulled the jacket off and looked at the fine, delicate shirt Laurent had on underneath.

“It’s almost like another layer of your skin,” he said. “Soft and delicate.”

“I’m not soft and delicate,” Laurent said in a stern voice. There was no malice behind it thought.

“Not to anyone else,” Damen said with a smile. “But you are to me. Soft and delicate in the most beautiful of ways.” Damen leaned in and kissed Laurent.

Laurent moaned into his kiss and reached for Damen’s pants, undoing them and pushing them down. Damen slipped off his shoes and quickly took off his socks and stepped out of his clothes, leaving it all on the floor. He began undoing the laces on Laurent’s pants as Laurent slipped the undershirt off.

Laurent fell back on the bed and Damen got on his knees and he slid the first boot off. Laurent grinned. Damen placed the boot on the side and then grabbed hold on the second one and slowly slid if off Laurent’s leg. He then stood and slipped Laurent’s pants off. He laid on top of him.

“This is already turning into the best birthday ever,” he said.

Laurent pushed up and Damen sat up on the bed. Laurent got up and took his boxers off and held his hand out for Damen. “Come on,” he said.

He led him to the bathroom of the hotel room. There were rose petals on the counter and floor as well. Damen grinned. Laurent opened up the shower door and was about to remove the Golden circlet when Damen stopped him. “Can you leave it on. Can you get it wet?”

“Yeah, it’s gold,” Laurent said.

“Leave it on,” Damen said again.

“Why?” Laurent asked. 

“Because you’re my Prince,” Damen said with a smile.

Laurent laughed and they entered the shower together. Laurent turned the water on and adjusted the temperature to a comfortable warm setting. Damen wrapped his arms around him from behind. “This is nice,” he said softly.

Laurent turned to face him. “Yes,” Laurent said softly.

He reached around Damen and grabbed the large loofah sponge that was hanging. He grabbed the bottle of body wash that was there as well. “These weren’t here last time,” Damen said.

“That’s because I had them put in for us for tonight,” Laurent replied softly.

He poured the body wash on the loofah and began to rub it on Damen’s chest. Damen stood back and watched. The bathroom was pleasantly warm now and the glass shower doors were steamed up. He watched as Laurent worked the sponge over his body. He was gentle with Damen, but there was nothing overtly sexual about what he was doing. Even when he washed between Damen’s legs.

When he was finished, he rinsed Damen off and Laurent reached up and released his hair. Damen leaned forward and wet his hair under the shower hear. He straightened and shook his head like a dog Laurent laughed. As Damen shampooed his hair, Laurent washed himself.

“I can’t shampoo with the circlet on,” Laurent said. “But I’ll leave it on.”

“Thank you,” Damen said smiling.

They were done. Laurent stepped towards him and kissed him, their naked bodies flush against each other. “Put your hands against the wall,” Laurent said. Damen did as Laurent asked. “You can’t... don’t...” Laurent took a step back. “Don’t touch me,” he said and then dropped to his knees.

Damen’s heart raced. He stayed perfectly still and his palms flat against the shower’s tiled wall. He almost dared to not breath, afraid a single wrong move would ruin the moment. Damen looked at the shower head that was still on and then, unmistakably, he felt first Laurent’s hand, stroke him. His body reacted, as it always did and he was hard in no time.

Damen knew Laurent didn’t do this. He almost couldn’t believe it was happening. And then... he felt his lips first. Laurent laid a soft kiss on the very tip which made Damen shudder in a way he never had before. He then felt a soft lick on the very tip as well, and then he felt Laurent place his lips, again right at the tip and then slowly open his mouth. Damen felt the pressure of his soft lips around him as he slid Damen’s erection into his mouth. Laurent took him in about half way and the other half, he wrapped his hand around.

Damen closed his eyes and tried to not come too quickly. It was amazing. Heavenly. Better than anyone else had ever felt. Laurent’s mouth was soft and warm and his tongue pressed against Damen and swirled around. Then he pulled him out and sucked on his head and he stroked him and Damen knew he was far too excited.

“Laurent,” He said, panting. Laurent kept going. “Laurent, I’m close. So close. I’m -“

Laurent took in as much as he could and sucked hard. There was no mistaking his intentions and Damen came. He let out a loud groan and he stood there panting, knees weak, leaning against the wall. He watched as Laurent stood up and wet his hand, wiping his mouth with it. He grinned at Damen. 

Damen walked to him, grabbed his face and kissed him deeply. Laurent froze for a moment.. but then leaned into the kiss. Damen turned the water off and picked Laurent up. “Happy birthday to me!” He said and Laurent laughed as Damen stepped out of the shower and bathroom and made his way to the bed with Laurent in his arms.


	30. XXX

The week after prom was the high school graduation ceremony. Laurent and Damen had picked up Miss Daisy for lunch and then had gone home so Damen could get ready. Laurent looked on as Miss Daisy fussed over Damen and smiled.

The high school ceremony was in a theater near by and it was packed. He went and greeted Erasmus’s parents and they all sat together. Nikandros’s parents were walking by and spotted Erasmus’s parents and greeted them warmly by their first names. They sat with them as well.

Once the ceremony was over Nikandros’s dad invited everyone to a steak house nearby and said he was treating everyone to dinner. They were all seated in a large C shaped booth made for large parties. Laurent sat beside Damen, who sat beside Miss Daisy who sat beside Erasmus’s mom. Nikandros’s dad and Erasmus’s dad seemed to get along and Erasmus and Nik’s mom were also in conversation and laughing. A good time was had by all.

* * *

Summer vacation started and Auguste came home. He spent a good amount of time with Damen and Laurent since Ada helped at the family restaurant Monday through Thursday. Somehow Damen and Auguste found something sports related that they would go do. Laurent didn’t mind. He would join them at least once. Baseball. Soccer. Indoor hockey. Track. Swimming events. Laurent would lean against Damen and try to not fall sleep.

If Erasmus was free Laurent would spend the time with him. This was the first summer they weren’t sharing together like before. It was ok thought. Whether they talked everyday or once a week, Erasmus and Laurent felt as if they always picked up where they left off.

Second week of June, Auguste told Laurent he would go on tv and do a short segment on 20/20. Laurent was surprised. They were eating lunch poolside, the brothers and Damen, when Auguste told him.

“When would you do it?” Laurent asked.

“Next week Friday. So in 10 days.”

“Wow,” Laurent said.

“I figured it would be better. I’m going to see the questions they’re allowed to ask me before so no surprises. Plus, they’re not tryin to make us look bad, we’re the orphans.”

Laurent chuckled. “Indeed we are.” He looked at Damen. “I’ve never asked you about your mom,” Laurent said.

“I never knew her and I never really was old enough to inquire about it to my dad,” Damen said. “I do remember my dad saying she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.”

“So you don’t know is she’s alive?” Laurent asked.

“No,” Damen said.

“So you could have tried to find her and go with her instead of foster care,” Laurent said.

“She’s not on my birth certificate. She gave my dad all the rights. She didn’t want me. She wouldn’t want me 13 years later and anyway how would I have done that? I never had resources to try to find her.”

Laurent leaned back on his chair and and pondered over this as they continued their lunch.

* * *

Ten days later, Auguste, Ada, Laurent and Damen were all on the large leather couch in front of the tv in the media room. Mrs. Paschal was sitting on an armchair off to the side. Laurent realized he had never talked to her about his uncle. He didn’t know if he wanted to. If she only had kind things to say about him, he didn’t know how he would take it.

20/20 came on. Auguste was the first segment. Laurent felt his heart pound and he felt Damen’s warm hand wrap around his left hand. He looked at Damen and smiled. They hadn’t had any arguments since Spring Break.

Auguste appeared on the screen. He was in a nice plaid baby blue shirt and khakis. He had a light navy blue Polo jacket on top. His hair was perfectly combed. He looked like a preppy all American young man. There was a brief history of their mother’s tragic passing and then less than a decade later the loss of their father.

“I was dealing as best as I could but it was my little brother I was most worried about,” Auguste said. They cut to a picture of the Laurent and Auguste. It was the summer before Auguste went off to Harvard. That’s the picture Laurent had told Auguste to have them use. It was the last summer Laurent remembered being truly happy. The reporter mentioned Laurent, who was still a minor, had decided to not talk on camera.

“I went off to Harvard,” Auguste said. “And I still wished I hadn’t. Part of me. My brother and were no longer under the same roof and at times I feel it was the worst thing I did. But Laurent understood. He’s the most amazing young man ever. I love him with all my heart.”

Auguste teared up on camera and Laurent did as well. He looked at his brother now and they smiled. Then there was talk of their uncle. Laurent watched at he dropped the news Laurent wanted everyone to know.

“So you have not talked to your uncle now for over six months?”

“No,” Auguste said. “I am my brother’s guardian. Legal guardian. He was gone all of December and then he came home for a couple of days in January and then he left without so much as a goodbye to my brother or I. We were both home. He left a letter for us and we have not heard from him since. He sold all his stock in the family business, and he was replaced in the board of directors. He has just disappeared from our lives completely.”

Laurent was happy. This is what he wanted out there. Auguste was asked if he missed his uncle and he answered that it seemed he didn’t want to have to have anything to do with them and he and Laurent were ok with that if that’s what his uncle wanted. “My brother and I have each other and we’ll be fine,” he said with a smile.

The interview was over soon after that. “That was great,” Laurent said. Damen reached across Laurent’s shoulder and patted Auguste on the back. Ada told him he did a good job as well. Laurent was pleased this was over and now everyone knew their uncle wasn’t a part of their lives.

* * *

The rest of June was relaxing. Fourth of July they went back to the Hamptons and Laurent and Damen were back to the room with the two twin sized beds. 

“Which bed do you want?” Laurent asked Damen.

“Whichever bed you’re in,” he answered.

Laurent chuckled. “How is that going to work?”

“Well I remember laying beside you and making it work last year.”

Laurent smiled. “Last year,” he said.

“Yeah,” Damen replied.

Laurent looked up at him. “We’ll make the bed thing work.”

“You don’t have a choice,” Damen said grinning.

Nikandros, Erasmus and their parents had come for the Fourth as well. Damen and Laurent went over the first night. Laurent wanted to ride the jet ski.

“Are you sure?” Damen asked him as he put on a life vest.

“Yes,” Laurent said. “Remember the crash was no fault of my own and right now it’ll only be me and Erasmus. It’ll be fine.”

Damen couldn’t help but be worried but he knew he was being silly. He kept a keen eye on Laurent though.

“So you’re like very in love,” Nikandros said.

“Yeah. As are you.”

“I am,” Nikandros said. “I hope Erasmus never gets tired of me because I...”

“I know,” Damen whispered.

Nikandros sighed. “So I’m glad you’ll be staying with Erasmus and I. It’ll be great! Harvard! Us!”

Damen grinned. “I was going to ask you about my part of the rent and utilities.”

“None,” Nik said.

“Nikandros,” Damen started.

“No. No. No. Erasmus isn’t paying anything either.”

“Well he’s your boyfriend -“

“And your my best friend and when Erasmus and I marry you’ll be my best man and you’ll be uncle Damen to my kids.”

Damen stared at Nikandros. People still asked if they were brother on occasion and it was amazing to him to be referred to as a best friend.

“I’ve never had a best friend before,” Damen said.

“What? You’re an amazing guy! Loyal and honest.”

“Thank you,” Damen said. He looked out into the ocean at Laurent. “I’ve never been somewhere long enough to make a best friend. It’s funny, if it weren’t for Mr. De Vere I would have never met him,” Damen pointed to the ocean. “You.”

Nikandros smiled. “Everything happens for a reason,” he said. “If you and I had never become friends I would have never gotten with Erasmus.”

Damen smiled. “Everything happens for a reason,” he repeated nodding.

“Damen I care about you man. I...” Damen looked at him. “Laurent is unstable.”

“I love him, Nik.”

“I know. It’s just.. Auguste isn’t like that. Is all.”

“That’s because they’re two different people.”

Nikandros sighed. He knew it was pointless to say more and he didn’t want to risk creating a wedge between he and Damen. “I’m always here for you, bro.”

“I know, thank you,” Damen said. “I’m here for you as well. Always.” He smiled at Nikandros who put and arm around him and looked back out into the ocean to watch Laurent. 

* * *

When Damen and Laurent got back to their place they showered and got into bed. Ada and Auguste were already sleeping so they were as quiet as possible.

Laurent laid on Damen, his face nuzzled in Damen’s neck as Damen traced shapes into the soft skin of his skin. Damen let out a sigh of relief. In all the months that had passed Damen felt the huge steps he and Laurent had made. He felt how Laurent had trusted him and let him in, and yet there was still a part of Laurent that was as closed and guarded as ever. Damen wasn’t sure what to do about that except give him time. He couldn’t pressure Laurent into opening up. He knew that would lead to disastrous results.

Damen let our another sigh.

“What are you sighing about?” Laurent asked softly.

Damen smiled. “They’re good and happy sighs.”

Laurent tilted his face up and kissed Damen’s neck. “I want to...” he began.

Damen waited and moment. “What is it?” He asked gently.

“I want to try something,” Laurent said softly.

“Ok,” Damen said. His heart was pounding. Laurent always made his heart race. He didn’t think he would ever just get used to being physical with Laurent. 

Laurent pushed up and straddled Damen. He leaned down and kissed him. His blond hair was all around Damen. He loved how it smelled and how soft it was. It was beautiful. He felt Damen’s hips move on him. Damen gasped softly. He loved this. “Can we...” Laurent whispered. Damen looked up at him. “I want to, like this.”

Damen nodded and Laurent started kissing him deeply. Laurent moaned into Damen’s lips. Damen was hard already. He felt Laurent kiss down his body and take his sleep shorts off. His heart was pounding. Laurent then climbed off the bed and got what they needed from their overnight bag. Damen slipped on a condom and stroked some lube on. Laurent climbed on top of him. He could hear Laurent’s soft pants and could see his heart racing. 

“I got you,” Damen said as he put his hand on Laurent’s hip.

Laurent nodded and leaned in and they kissed again. Softly at first then deeply and Damen felt Laurent move on top on him. Damen held his erection up and Laurent slowly slid down on him. He grasped Damen’s shoulders. He let out a breath once Damen was all the way inside of him.

“Is that -“

“Yes,” Laurent said quickly, panting softly.

Damen leaned in and began to kiss him softly and gently, like he knew Laurent enjoyed. Laurent’s breathing was shallow and the movements of his hips were controlled. Damen closed his eyes as Laurent’s body, warm and tight around him, almost barely moved and yet brought him so much pleasure. Damen was slowly kissing right under Laurent’s jaw. He let out a soft moan and tightened his body around Damen. Damen furrowed his brow and gently bit the soft skin he was kissing.

They continued like this, taking their time and enjoying everything they were feeling. All with a controlled intensity that was deeply satisfying for both of them. Although in previous times together, Laurent had let go a bit more, something like this, a new way of making love, seemed to bring out his insecurities and Damen wanted nothing more than to protect him and make him feel good.

Damen felt Laurent reach for his hand and place it on his throbbing erection. Damen happily stroked him, working his lips slowly down his neck. He felt Laurent’s body tightening and tensing. It sent a wave of ecstasy through him and she closed his eyes and willed himself not to come. Damen kept stroking Laurent and circled his thumb around his head. Laurent moaned and came, warm release shooting across Damen’s abdomen. This proved to be too much for Damen and he came too. He pulled Laurent into him and kissed him. They pulled back, panting in tandem.

“Everything feels so good with you,” Laurent said, it seemed, without thinking.

“Good,” Damen replied. “That’s how it should be.”

“Yes,” Laurent said, sitting up and seeming to regain total control of himself.

He got up and they they cleaned up and crawled back into bed. Laurent felt warm and soft as Damen wrapped his arms around him. 

Damen opened his mouth. ‘You know I’ll always love you no matter what,’ he wanted to say. ‘Nothing you say could ever change that.’ But he closed his mouth and only kissed the top of Laurent’s head. Laurent would speak when he was ready. Damen knew he was patient. He could wait. In the mean time he would just love Laurent as best as he could. 


	31. XXXI

July was hot but August proved to be hotter with the first weekend of the month proving to be too much for Laurent. He stayed indoors. Damen and Auguste went to some baseball game and Laurent was more than happy to let them go together. He picked up his violin and played a while. He played A Song Without Words and recalled the first time he laid eyes on Damen. He smiled. He had been rude but it didn’t matter now... they were happy.

Happy.

Somehow Laurent never believed that would be him. He still didn’t believe it. The doorbell rang. Laurent put his violin down and walked out of the music room and through the library and sitting room. He heard voices.

“He’s not here right now only younger master De Vere is home,” he heard Mrs. Paschal said.

“Who is it?” Laurent called out and walked into the entrance hallway. Mrs. Paschal stood with a middle aged man in a dress shirt and slacks. He was shorter than Laurent with short salt and pepper hair. He was quite fit still. Laurent knew who it was by looking at him.

“Good afternoon, Mr. De Vere,” he said in a deep voice that somehow commanded attention. “My name is Makedon and I’m -“

“I know who you are. Follow me,” Laurent said. “Thank you,” he told Mrs. Paschal. She gave him a nod and turned and walked away. She didn’t look pleased. Laurent watched her go and then led Makedon through the sitting room to the library.

Once there, Laurent gestured to an arm chair and sat on one adjacent. “Have you caught him?” Laurent asked. He saw no reason to beat around the bush.

“Yes,” Makedon answered.

“Where was he?”

“Thailand,” he said.

Laurent nodded. “What will he be charged with?”

“Possession of child pornography, aggravated child assault and traveling to another country with the purpose of having sex with a minor.”

“You have solid proof then? He has money. He can hire the best lawyers.”

“We have his personal laptop and at least one of the places he visited had a camera. They would let the men purchase a video of what they did there. He visited the place more than once. It will be hard to fight the video evidence.”

Laurent nodded. He had detached himself completely. He hadn’t done that in a while. “Good. Is he in the country now?”

“No, he’s still being processed. I wanted to come in and let your brother and you know.”

“When is he expected to be on US soil?”

“Best case scenario two weeks. It could be a month depending on what his lawyers try to do but this is an ongoing case and has been since last year so I don’t see his lawyers keeping him overseas for more than 3 weeks. Plus, I don’t see why he would want to be. The prisons here are much more comfortable.”

Laurent nodded again. “Ok,” he said. He looked at Makedon’s face. “Did you see my brother on 20/20?”

Makedon looked a bit surprised by the question. “I did,” he said.

“I wanted him to do it. De Vere Hotels has over 800 employees and my father worked very hard to build the business. My uncle and his perversions have hurt enough people. I didn’t want his inevitable capture to cost the livelihood of so many.”

Makedon gazed upon Laurent a moment. “Mister De Vere,” he said softly. Laurent looked at him, surprised at the sudden softness of his voice. “There are people we work with that can help family members going through a hard time. I’m sure hearing such things about your uncle must be difficult -“

“I’m fine,” Laurent said with an edge in his voice.

Makedon nodded and smiled. “Of course you are sir, I never said you weren’t.”

“Is that all then?” Laurent asked.

“Yes I believe it is. You have my card?”

“I do. I’m sure you have Auguste’s number. Would you like mine as well?”

“No, young sir, I’m sure one is enough. We will call you and let you know when we expect your uncle to arrive.”

“Thank you so much,” Laurent said graciously, standing up. “Let me walk you out.”

* * *

The sun was beginning to set when Damen and Auguste came home. They walked inside the house and found Laurent sitting on the stairs, lights all off, he was practically sitting in the dark.

“What’s wrong?” Damen asked, walking to him quickly. Laurent looked... he couldn’t tell. His eyes seemed out of focus. 

“They caught him, he was in Thailand,” Laurent said. He wasn’t looking at either Damen or Auguste. Damen hated how hollow his voice sounded.

“Oh,” Auguste said. Damen didn’t know what to say or do.

“He... he went there. He... he has video of... child porn and what he did.” Laurent looked as if he was about to ill and Damen reached for him. “I’m fine,” Laurent said, putting his right hand up, as if trying to keep Damen away. He stood up and began walking up the stairs. Damen went as if to follow him but Auguste grabbed his arm.

“Give him space,” he said.

Damen shook his head and ran after Laurent. He caught up with him. “Laurent,” He said.

“Leave me alone,” Laurent replied.

“But -“

“Damen,” Laurent said in a icy tone Damen hadn’t heard in a long time. “I need to be alone. All night. Do you hear me? All night. Leave me alone.” And with that he slammed his bedroom door.

Damen stood there, he wasn’t sure for how long. He turned and walked back down stairs. His heart was pounding against his ribs. He could hardly breathe. He found Auguste on the large leather couch in front of the tv.

Damen went and sat by Auguste. “Tell me,” he told him.

Auguste stared at Damen. “What are you talking about?”

“The interview. Now this. You didn’t even seem shocked when Laurent implied your uncle had been caught with... and doing...” Damen had a hard time saying the words. He had memories of children he knew who had gone through similar tragedies. “Did you know?”

Auguste didn’t meet Damen’s eyes. He was afraid to say anything. He stayed silent.

“Auguste! Talk to me, man!”

“Damen, our uncle is bad man,” Auguste said. “And if he’s being accused of abusing children I believe it.” With that Auguste got up. “Give Laurent time, please, don’t push him.”

“When have I ever?!” Damen asked, exasperated.

“Never. You’ve been nothing but good. You’ve done nothing but love him and you’ve made him the happiest I’ve seen him in years. I’ll always be thankful for that.”

Damen heard Auguste leave the media room and walk down the entrance hallway. He heardhim go up the stairs. Damen sat there, silent. ‘Not a good man.’ They believed all the accusations against Mr. De Vere. That was their uncle, the man who had looked after them as if they were his own sons. They would so quickly believe these atrocious allegations? That he would abuse children? They would suddenly take the word of others without seeming to fight for the truth?

Damen’s heart, again, pounded against his ribs. Unless...

Auguste was 15 when his father had died and had gone under the care of his uncle but Laurent had only been 10.. “No,” Damen said again. He closed his eyes. He couldn’t deal with the thought so he didn’t let himself think it. He just didn’t. He couldn’t.

* * *

Auguste laid in bed staring up at the ceiling. He had been doing this for a long while. He heard his door open and he sat up. Laurent walked into his room and sat at the edge of his bed.

“Hey,” Auguste said.

“Makedon said he would be back as soon as two weeks from now. They seem to have an air tight case. The places he visited recorded what he did to... you know.” Auguste nodded. “Then he would buy or get a copy or whatever. So they have video of him.”

“Ok,” Auguste said.

“I...” Laurent shook his head. Auguste went over and sat beside him, putting an arm around him. “It’ll be all over the news. I can’t, Auguste. I can’t hear it. I can’t take it. These 24 hour news channels will talk about it every hour on the hour and we will be called for comments even though you did the interview.”

“Ok,” Auguste said. His mind raced. He needed to protect Laurent. He hadn’t been able to before but he had to now. He had to remove Laurent from all this. “I’ll get you out of the country. You and Damen, ok? How does that sound?”

“Really?” Laurent asked looking up at Auguste with wide eyes.

Auguste felt such an ache in his chest. Laurent looked so young. He was young. He was still a kid, only 17. “Yes!” Auguste said. “Yes.”

* * *

After exiting Auguste’s room Laurent quietly walked to Damen’s room. He hesitated by the door. He wasn’t sure what he would say to Damen. He would ask questions and Laurent didn’t want to answer any. Laurent also didn’t want to be kissed or held or even touched, not even by Damen at that moment, but his presence would be comforting. Laurent sighed and decided against going into Damen’s room. He would rather be alone. It was better that way.

* * *

“Damen.”

Damen shook his head and sat up. He had fallen asleep on the couch last night. His eyes burned when he tried to open them. “Fuck,” he groaned as he put his elbows on his knees and pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes.

“Hey,” Auguste said, patting him on the back. “Do you have a passport?”

“What?” Damen asked.

“Do you have a passport?”

“Yeah,” Damen said.

“Good. You and Laurent are going to France. This Friday. You’ll fly back Labor Day weekend.”

“What?!” Damen asked, now wide awake.

Damen looked up at Auguste. He looked so much like Laurent at the moment, showing no emotion, just being matter of fact. “My uncle will be here in two or three weeks and the whole situation will be unsavory. Laurent doesn’t need to put up with it. I’ll deal with it. Plus, you two will spend so much time apart the coming year. I thought a trip to Paris, the most romantic city in the world might do you two good!” Auguste gave him a huge grin. Had this been last week, Damen would have bought this hook, line and sinker, but a lot had changed in the last 24 hours.

“Why don’t you tell me why you’re shipping us off to Paris? The real reason.”

“Because I’m afraid if I don’t he may have a fucking nervous breakdown or worse!” Auguste said suddenly fierce.

“How am I to take care of him if he can’t tell me what’s wrong and you refuse me!” Damen said, equally fierce.

“I am not at liberty to tell you,” Auguste said in a steady voice. He didn’t sound angry anymore but still stern. “Now you’re either helping me or you’re not, so which is it?”

“Of course I’ll help you! I fucking love him, Auguste!”

Auguste’s face softened. “I know, Damen I know.” He sat and leaned back on the couch. He looked tired, eyes red rimmed. “I love him too. I was supposed to always protect him. Dad always told me to protect him and I...”

Damen stared at him and all the fears from last night came creeping back. He wouldn’t ask Auguste though, he knew he wouldn’t say and Damen was still dealing with the idea of it all. He shut his eyes. “I’ll do anything Laurent wants.”

“Thank you,” Auguste said.

* * *

It was past noon and Damen and Auguste hadn’t seen Laurent all morning. Damen was growing antsy. “Should I try to go and talk to him?” Damen asked out loud.

“Let’s give him till dinner. One of the maids took a tray of food and he ate.”

“Oh, ok,” Damen said and that did make him feel better, although not much.

Damen and Auguste looked at each other. It was an ugly feeling, the heaviness, the situation with the uncle and on top of that, the way Laurent was acting. They were addressing his behavior, yet, not truly speaking about it freely. Even though Damen had worked things out he hadn’t accepted them. Not truly. He was hoping he was totally wrong and one day Laurent would tell him about why he was having such a hard time and it would be because... Damen shook his head. Anything but what he feared.

Laurent did indeed come down for dinner and Damen just made easy conversation. His heart melted when Laurent leaned against him during dinner. He kissed the top of his head. Once dinner was over they went and watched a movie. Laurent picked A Quiet Place. Afterwards Laurent said he wanted to watch another scary movie and Auguste put on something else but Laurent fell sleep soon after it started. He was leaning on Damen and Damen didn’t want to wake him.

“Just pass me the throw,” Damen told Auguste. “I’ll stay here with him. You can turn everything off.”

“Ok,” Auguste said and did as Damen asked. Once everything was off, Damen tucked the blanket around Laurent and closed his eyes. He slept on and off but he found himself having nightmares. He kept dreaming Laurent was calling for him and Damen would run around in something that seemed like a maze, trying to find him but never could. After the second time he woke up from the same dream he decided to stay awake.


	32. XXXII

“Ok you guys got all your luggage ready?” Auguste asked.

“Yup!” Laurent said.

Damen nodded. He had talked to Miss Daisy a couple of days ago, and when he had told her he was off to Paris until Labor Day weekend she looked very happy for him. “What a wonderful way to spend the rest of the summer!” She had said.

“Yeah,” Damen had agreed and had smiled.

Nikandros didn’t seem surprised by it all when they had told him and Erasmus yesterday.“Well, Erasmus and I have found a place we liked, we’ll be waiting for you when you’re back then,” he had said.

Damen had nodded and smiled and thanked him as he had watched Laurent and Erasmus talk with their heads leaned in together. They were whispering and Laurent looked teary eyed. Damen wondered if Erasmus knew.

Damen looked at Laurent now. He seemed fine. He probably was, Damen thought. He was probably relieved. Damen wanted to feel as if he and Laurent were just spending time together before he went off to Harvard and they wouldn’t be able to spend every day together as they had the last year. That was all. Of course it was more complicated than that, but Damen didn’t want to think of the complications. He wanted to keep things simple. He would do his best to try to keep it simple.

* * *

The flight was a long one but Damen wasn’t complaining. Laurent truly seemed to be in a good mood. He was chatty and looked happy.

Damen had learned that he and Laurent would be staying with a cousin of his mother. Her name was Halvik and she had a daughter a year younger than Laurent. Her name was Vannes. Damen held Laurent’s hand and noticed he had fallen sleep on his shoulder. Damen let his mind wander. He truly hoped Laurent could put whatever was happening with his uncle behind him. He didn’t know how he would. He wondered when Laurent went back to school, how he would handle it, everyone would know by then. Damen wished he could be there and protect him. He sighed and placed his cheek on top of Laurent’s head and looked out the window at the sky and clouds. 

* * *

They landed in France and Laurent and Damen were greeted by Halvik. Damen liked her from the moment he saw her. She spoke English very well, with a lovely French accent of course. She was tall with dark hair and light olive toned skin.

“You look so much like your mother!” She told Laurent as she hugged him.

Vannes seemed to take after Laurent’s side of the family as well. She was thin with blond hair and blue eyes. Her and Laurent looked like brother and sister almost.

Halvik talked the whole ride home. Vannes was beside her, quiet, and Damen and Laurent answered when spoken to in the backseat. The ride home was kind of long. Halvik didn’t live in Paris but outside where the pace of life was slower. When they reached the home, Damen took a look around. The home looked like a large cottage, with lovely stone walls, thick white pane windows and a dark roof. There was a lovely garden in the front, the front drive way was a semi circle.

The sun was setting and they all exited the car and grabbed a piece of luggage each. Once they entered the home, Damen smelled cinnamon and vanilla, as if someone had been baking all day. “Vannes made you boys cookies!” Halvik said. Vannes gave them a shy smile. Damen and Laurent smiled back.

Damen could feel Laurent’s apprehension. He put an arm around him. “They smell wonderful,” Damen said.

“Come on, let me show you to your room,” Halvik said climbing up the stairs. “I’m about to start cooking dinner.” They made it to the second floor. They walked into a room, a bit bigger than what Damen had at Miss Daisy’s. The bed was a queen size. The room was a pretty light green, the comforter a nice blue. “Make yourselves at home!” Halvik said and gave Laurent a soft squeeze on his arm.

Vannes set the carry on she had carried down on the floor and glanced at both of them. “So if our moms were cousins, what does that make us?” She asked and Damen was surprised she had no accent when speaking English.

“That makes us second cousins,” Laurent said.

Vannes nodded. She looked between Damen and Laurent. “I’ll see you at dinner,” she said, gave them both a tentative smile and turned to leave, closing the bedroom door softly behind her.

Laurent sighed and sat at the edge of bed, sinking in and slumping his shoulders forward. Damen went and sat beside him. He put his arm around Laurent. “You ok?” He asked.

Laurent nodded. “I’m glad you’re here,” he said softly. He leaned on Damen.

Damen felt himself melt inside. “I’m so glad I’m here,” he said.

“Damen,” Laurent said.

“Yes?” They pulled back and looked into each other’s eyes.

Laurent opened his mouth as if to speak but no words came out. He closed his mouth and looked away.

“It’s ok,” Damen said.

Laurent looked at him. “Is it?” He asked. He had an edge to his voice.

“It’s ok in the sense that it doesn’t matter to me. I just want you to be ok.”

Laurent nodded his head. “Sometimes I am,” he said softly without looking at Damen.

“I know,” Damen said. “I want you to feel that most of the time, not just sometimes.”

“And if I can’t?” Laurent asked finally looking up at Damen.

Damen looked deep into Laurent’s eyes. “I don’t know,” he said. “But I’ll never leave you.”

Laurent raised his eyebrows and blinked. He nodded and let Damen put his arms around him.

* * *

The days were pleasant. Damen and Laurent learned Halvik was divorced from Vannes’s father and worked rather long hours. Vannes was out of school too and the three of them spent every day together. They rode bikes into the closest town to do grocery shopping and whatever other shopping needed to be done. Halvik had a washing machine but clothes were hung to dry. There was a lake a few miles away and they went swimming sometimes. The best thing though was riding their bikes around the beautiful country side. Life felt relaxed and slow. They had been there a week when Vannes took them to the attic and then showed them how she would climb out the window and sit on the roof sometimes when she couldn’t sleep.

“How did you know you liked boys?” Vannes asked while they were sitting out there.

Laurent and Damen looked at each other. “I’ve always liked them. Damen likes both boys and girls though.”

Vannes perked up. “Oh really?”

“Yeah,” Damen said. “Just depends on their personalities, you know.”

“Yeah,” Vannes said. “I think I like both too.”

“Well, you don’t have to make up your mind. You can just let yourself like people and see what comes of it,” Laurent said looking up at the night sky.

They did this every night after. They would sit and talk and laugh. Damen could see the change in Laurent. The positive change. It seemed as if here he could breathe and just be. It scared Damen to think what it would mean come next weekend, Labor Day weekend.

* * *

Laurent awoke. He took a deep breath in and out. It was Wednesday. Auguste would arrive tomorrow. They were all supposed to fly back together Saturday except... Laurent didn’t want to go. He had been checking the news on his phone. He knew his uncle had been in the US two weeks now and every major network had covered it. It kept saying how the De Vere brothers had no comment.

Finally last week, Auguste had made a public statement. He had stood outside their flagship hotel in Rhode Island and said that neither he nor his brother had spoken to or seen their uncle since the beginning of the year. That he had not been involved in the operation of the hotels since the beginning of the year and that he was deeply saddened by what had happened. He also said that if all the charges were true that his uncle should pay for them all and he had trust in the justice system. He ended the news conference by giving a check to a local shelter for abused women and children.

Laurent knew all this. He hadn’t told Damen though that he was checking in like this. But he was... and Laurent had made up his mind. Here, far away from all that he could breathe. He wasn’t going back to Rhode Island. But... it wasn’t just up to him. He saw the hallway light turn on in the hallway and the soft padding of Halvik walking by. He slipped out of the warm bed and threw on Damen’s shirt. He exited his bedroom and walked downstairs softly.

Halvik was at the kitchen counter reading the newspaper, drinking her coffee. She spotted Laurent.

“Laurent! Morning sweetie.”

“Good morning,” he said walking towards her. “How are you?”

“Good thank you. Never seen you up this early. Everything ok?”

“Depends,” He said softly.

“Oh?” She asked looking at him intently.

Laurent tried to keep his composure as best as he could. “I don’t want to go back,” he said staring into Halvik’s eyes. “I’ve been following the news and I know Auguste had to give a press conference and the trial hasn’t even started. And -“

Halvik stood up. “Breathe,” she said. Laurent could feel his heart racing. He breathed. He had to get a hold of himself. “You can stay,” Halvik said. “You can stay as long as you want.”

She pulled Laurent in for a hug. He wasn’t expecting that. He hugged her tentatively. Laurent wasn’t much for hugs but he was ok with this. “I have money,” he said when they pulled back. “Auguste can give you money and I can buy my food and help with bills and -“

“Laurent,” Halvik said. “Hennike was an only child and my brother is twelve years older than I. She was the closest thing I had to a sister. She had just had you when I became pregnant with Vannes and she was the best ever.”

Laurent stared at Halvik. He saw the way her eyes teared up. He nodded.

“You can stay as long as you want,” she repeated. “Your boyfriend will be sad though.”

“He’s going to Harvard. He’ll make a good life for himself.”

Halvik furrowed her brow. “You’re breaking up?”

“I don’t know... I don’t know how long I have to stay,” Laurent whispered.

“Laurent?” Halvik asked. Laurent looked into her eyes again. “What are you running from?”

“Myself,” Laurent said without thinking. Was it true? “Memories,” he whispered.

“Does Auguste know?” She asked and Laurent nodded. “Does Damen know?” Laurent shook his head. “Will you tell him?”

“I don’t know if I can,” Laurent answered.

Halvik embraced Laurent again. “And you don’t have to tell me either,” she said. She was smoothing his hair. “But... if you can’t deal with this alone, maybe it would be a good idea you talk to someone while you’re here? What do you think?”

Laurent didn’t know what to think. He didn’t really feel like speaking to a stranger about himself. “Maybe,” he replied.

“Ok. Well go back up and sleep a couple of more hours ok?”

“Ok,” Laurent said. Halvik kisses his forehead and he smiled at her.

He turned and climbed back up the stairs and into his bedroom. He slipped Damen’s shirt off. He climbed back into bed. He slid close to Damen, who turned and pulled him in. Laurent felt an ache to his chest. Just three more days of this, of Damen. Laurent squeezed his eyes shut.

It hurt. It hurt so much but... but he couldn’t go back. He would be bombarded by news of his uncle. Sordid stories and details of his crimes would come out and Laurent would not be able to escape, and his brain... it would go haywire. It would be too much.

Laurent let out a breath. Now... he only had to break the news to Auguste... and Damen.


	33. XXXIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Just as it was, baby_   
>  _before the otherness came_   
>  _and I knew it’s name_   
>  _the love, the dark, the light, the shame._
> 
> _Eyes at the height of my babe_   
>  _and this hope at the fight of my babe_   
>  _and the lights were as bright as my babe_   
>  _but your love was unmoved_
> 
> _And the sights were as stark as my baby_  
>  _and the cold was as sharp as my baby_  
>  _and the nights were as dark as my baby_  
>  _half as beautiful too_  
>   
>  **As It Was**  
>  \- **Hozier**

Laurent stayed awake until Damen awoke. Once he was awake, Laurent pulled him close. “Make love to me,” Laurent said and Damen obliged. He was soft and tender and loving as always. He whispered more than once how much he loved Laurent, and Laurent quietly took the words in, wondering if he would ever hear those words again when he told Damen he wasn’t going back to Rhode Island.

* * *

Auguste arrived the following day and Halvik took them into Paris. They ate and walked around. They went into a souvenir shop and they looked around. There was a baby blue shirt Damen pointed at he said was the color of Laurent’s eyes. It had the Eiffel Tower on it and Damen grabbed it and said he wanted to buy it for him. Laurent didn’t stop him. They walked around a bit more and then finally returned to Halvik’s home. She fixed the pull out couch for Auguste and soon enough they all went to bed.

* * *

Laurent couldn’t sleep. The weight of his decision pressed heavy on him. He figured it would be easiest to tell Auguste and even though it was the middle of the night, there was no time like the present.

He slipped out of bed. He saw the shirt Damen had bought. Once they had gotten back, they had opened up the packaging and they saw it was humongous. It said one size fits all. Laurent had put it on and it had hung mid thigh. Damen had smiled and told Laurent how beautiful his legs looked.

Laurent sighed and pulled the shirt on. He had sleep pants on underneath. He softly exited his bedroom and walked down the stairs. Auguste was on his phone. He looked up as Laurent walked into the living room.

“Hey,” He said.

“Can’t sleep?” Laurent asked.

“Damn time change,” he said. “Well just two days anyway and then we’re flying back,” he shrugged returning back to his phone.

“About that,” Laurent said sitting at the end of the pull out couch.

Auguste looked up and stared at his brother. “What?” He asked softly.

Laurent swallowed. He closed his eyes. “I’ve been following the news,” he said. “I know his trial won’t start until next year, I know you’ve made the public statement and made that donation.”

“Laurent,” Auguste said, pain in his eyes.

“I’ve heard and read what’s been said on CNN and MSNBC and if I go back to school everyone will know. I can’t escape there, Auguste. And...” Laurent swallowed. “And I can’t deal with them knowing who he is! Anyone can look at me and maybe figure shit out and anyone can look at how old I was when we were left with him. One person already, on one of the articles online, in the comments said ‘oh I hope he didn’t do anything to his nephews.’”

Laurent suddenly ran out of breath. He leaned forward onto the pullout and he felt the tightening in his chest. “Brother?!” Auguste said, Laurent could hear the panic in his voice.

“Get Damen,” Laurent somehow gasped and he felt Auguste jump out and run upstairs.

The tightening had spread up to his throat and down, below his arms and around his chest almost to his back. It seemed like forever but then he felt Damen’s strong arms around him. He leaned in.

“It’s ok. Just breathe, ok? Just focus on my voice and breath. It’s ok. It’s ok.”

Laurent breathed. Little by little the pressure eased on his chest and throat. Then he was only slightly dizzy and thirsty and Damen got him water. He leaned on him, feeling too weak to do anything else. Finally, when he felt almost back to normal he sat up. The sun was rising. Halvik came down and found them all.

“Everything alright?” She asked, looking from one to the other. Laurent nodded. “I’ll make some breakfast then,” she said with a small smile. 

Laurent glanced at Damen. “Can I have a moment with Auguste?” He said in a small voice of his own.

Damen furrowed his brow but nodded and got up and went back upstairs. Auguste looked even more pale than usual.

“I’ve already asked Halvik and she said I could stay,” Laurent whispered.

Auguste nodded, still looking overwhelmed. “Damen will be so sad,” he finally said after a moment.

Laurent nodded. “His young and handsome and perfect and about to begin Harvard. He’ll find a new girl to fuck soon enough.”

“Don’t do that,” Auguste said. “Don’t make it seem like what you two have isn’t the real thing.” He almost sounded mad at Laurent.

Laurent felt his own anger surge. “Did you not see _me_!?” He whispered angrily. “You think a 18 year old wants to be stuck with someone as useless as that forever! It happened when he tried to touch my inner thigh the first time! I don’t even know how he hasn’t run for the hills yet!”

Auguste leaned in and Laurent could tell he was as equally mad. “Well fine! Stay! I get it, ok! What happened messed you up but you fucking promise me if you stay you’ll get help, Laurent! Go to a therapist! Get professional help because Damen fucking loves you more than I have seen anyone love anyone else and I doubt he’ll ever forget you and you need to get better so you can come back to the US for him _and_ for me!” Laurent stared wide eyed at Auguste. “Not to mention for your company. De Vere Hotels is yours. Life for you isn’t here! It’s back home and you can only run away for so long. You can’t outrun your demons forever. So face them! Fight them! And then come home.”

Laurent stayed frozen in place. After a moment he nodded. “Ok,” he said.

“I’ll tell Halvik,” Auguste said. “I’ll ask her to find a bilingual therapist in Paris.” Laurent nodded again. They locked gazes. “Good luck telling Damen,” he said, shook his head and walked to the kitchen.

* * *

Laurent had returned upstairs and Damen held him a while. He went back downstairs and had breakfast. Everyone was quiet and Vannes looked a bit confused by the silence. Laurent decided he would tell Damen that night. He didn’t want to ruin their last day together. 

As the day wore on, Laurent tried to be as cheerful as possible. They went bike riding then had lunch outside. They went swimming and then went for a stroll before dinner.

Dinner was quite elaborate. Halvik had stayed home and cooked and everything was delicious and perfect. There were some pastries after dinner.Everyone was relaxed and sitting around the living room.

Halvik spoke of her and Hennike growing up. The things they did as young girls for fun. Laurent listened and imagine his mother, a young girl about his age, same blond hair and blue eyes, not a care in the world. 

“I bet she was beautiful,” Laurent said softly.

“She looked a lot like you,” Halvik replied.

* * *

Damen and Laurent entered their room after saying good night to everyone.

“Let’s pack now,” Damen said. “I don’t want to rush tomorrow.”

Laurent nodded. “I’ll help you pack,” he said softly.

Damen looked at him. For some reason, he didn’t look surprised. “You’re...”

“Staying,” Laurent said. He willed himself to not be sad. It wasn’t really working.

“Oh,” Damen said and sat at the edge of the bed. He nodded. “I noticed how free you seemed,” he said softly.

Laurent went and sat beside him. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I just... it’s too much,” Laurent said.

“That’s fine,” Damen replied and Laurent looked up at him in surprise. “Lots of people have long distance relationships,” he said. “I can visit you during my time off school. We can text and FaceTime. We can make it work.”

Laurent took Damen’s hand. “I think it would be best if we... didn’t.”

Damen stared at him. “Didn’t what?”

“Have a long distance relationship,” Laurent replied.

Damen looked confused. “Why? What other choice do we have?” And as he asked this his eyes widened. “Laurent!”

Laurent looked away. He couldn’t take the way Damen was looking at him.

“Are you kidding me? I _love_ you! I -“

“Yes. Yes. I _know_ you do. Please,” Laurent said closing his eyes. “Please realize this is for the best.” 

“It is not! The best is us being together. Me being with you! Me... Laurent, look at me!”

It took a while but he finally did. He finally looked at Damen. He was crying and it was the worst things Laurent had ever seen. The most heartbreaking. He clenched his jaw and tried to fight back his own tears.

“Why?” Damen asked. “Have I not shown you how much I -“

“It’s not you,” Laurent said in a shaky voice. “ _You_ are perfect, _you_ are amazing, _you_ ,” Laurent said furrowing his brow. “I have no words to describe how much you have done.”

Damen shook his head as his chin trembled. “But?” He asked softly.

Laurent wiped his face. “But I am not... ok.” He looked at Damen. “I... I want to, need to, deal with some things and -“

“And so? Deal with them. Why can’t I be beside you while you do it? I will do anything. Whatever it takes. I will be by you every step of the way. I won’t let you down.”

Laurent gave him a sad smile. “Because it isn’t fair to you,” he said.

Damen let out exasperated sigh. “Let me decide that!”

“No because you are too selfless,” Laurent said. “You’ll easily waste your life away waiting for me to be emotionally ok to be the partner you deserve and this is not fair, Damen,” Laurent said.

“I don’t care about _fair_!” Damen said.

“Well I do! And you deserve happiness!”

“You are my happiness!” Damen exclaimed.

Laurent smiled in spite of everything. “How can I be your happiness when I’m not even happy myself?” Laurent asked.

Damen shook his head. “I will do all I can to make you happy,” he said in a pleading way.

“And you have,” Laurent said. “So much.” The tears started again and this time Damen began to cry harder. They both just sat and cried a moment. “But I... I am not ok and we both know this,” Laurent whispered. “I am sick of living half a life. I... I have to take care of myself before I can truly take care of anyone else and to be the partner someone like you deserves I need to be able to do that.”

Damen nodded and wiped his tears. “Then I’ll wait,” he said. “I’ll wait for you forever.” 

“No,” Laurent replied. 

Damen sobbed quietly. “Why? Why are you pushing me away?!”

“Because you’re 18 and too young to put up with this shit. You should act your age and enjoy Harvard and go party and live life!”

“But I don’t want -“

“You think you don’t,” Laurent said wiping his face again. “You think you don’t but you deserve to just be a typical college freshman. Have fun. Live life.”

Damen shook his head and he wiped more tears away. “I won’t. I only want you.”

“I need to take care of me,” Laurent said. 

“I’m not stopping you. I’m letting you. Stay. Take your time. Just don’t leave _me_.”

Laurent closed his eyes and stayed silent.

“Laurent!” Damen said in a sad pleading voice. “You don’t even want to be _friends_?” 

“Do you?” Laurent asked. “Because I can’t be. I feel so much more. I can’t pretend to be your friend. I can’t... Damen,” Laurent said looking into his eyes. “Please. I can’t. I need... I need time to fix me.” 

Damen got up from the bed and walked around a bit. Laurent pulled his knee up to his chest and watched him as he paced around, tears falling down his face. He finally stopped and looked at Laurent. Laurent put his chin in his knee. “You, we,” Damen said gesturing between them. “Shouldn’t have to be dealing with this. You didn’t deserve it.”

Laurent felt the blood drain from his face. Did he know? How did he know? “What did Auguste tell you?” Laurent asked with an edge to his voice.

Damen stared at him. “Nothing,” he said. “I’m not an idiot.” 

Laurent raised his eye brows and Damen noticed how pale he looked. “It’s that obvious?” He asked.

Damen froze. He wasn’t sure what to say. What to do. He was at a loss. Laurent, he realized, was right. Damen, as much as he loved him didn’t know how to proceed at times. He had always just been patient but Laurent had never truly been open. He had never spoken about it. And if Laurent couldn’t handle it, what was Damen to do? He was no expert. He could love Laurent... he did, he always would, but the enormity of the situation finally hit him like a ton of bricks. What if he said or did the wrong thing? Damen sighed, feeling defeated. Laurent was asking for the time and space to take care of himself emotionally, Damen could not stand in the way. 

Damen walked to him and hugged him tight. “All that’s obvious is how much I love you,” He said. “That’s something that will never, ever change.”

* * *

Damen sat on the plane beside Auguste. The seat between them empty.

Damen had acted as normal as he could. He hadn’t even cried. He had held Laurent all night. He kept himself together with a simple thought: Laurent just needed time. How much? It didn’t matter. He would wait. Then, Laurent would come home and they would be together. That’s it. Simple. He could do it. He would do it.

Damen didn’t talk the whole flight home, no matter how much Auguste tried to engage him in conversation and after a while he stopped trying.

Damen’s grief turned to anger. Laurent didn’t deserve this. He didn’t deserve this either. This was all one person’s fault. Just one.

* * *

They were at baggage claim when Damen finally spoke.

“Take me to your uncle,” he said. 

Auguste stared at him. “What?”

“Take me to your uncle,” Damen repeated.

“Why?”

“You know why,” Damen said as they got their luggage.

“It won’t change anything,” Auguste said.

“I don’t care,” Damen said through gritted teeth loading the luggage to a cart. 

“I can’t,” Auguste said.

“Fine,” Damen replied. “But I’m going, with or without you and if I kill him, you can’t blame me.”

“Damen!” Auguste said.

“Are you taking me or not?!” Damen asked. Auguste swallowed and finally nodded.

* * *

Damen was deep in his thoughts the whole ride. Auguste didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t blame Damen. He had felt all this himself. He didn’t have the stomach to speak to his uncle though and he wasn’t sure why Damen even wanted to do this. But who was he to tell Damen how to deal?

* * *

Damen looked around. This wasn’t like it was in the movies. There was no thick plexiglass window with two phones on either side. Instead there was a common room that sort of looked like a school cafeteria. Small square stainless steel tables and chairs and fluorescent lights. It was clean and quiet. It didn’t seem real.

Damen felt a heat rise up his body when he saw him enter, being escorted by a prison guard. He looked surprised when he saw Damen. He looked the same. Hair perfectly combed and beard perfectly trimmed. He didn’t even looked bothered by the fact that he was in an orange jumpsuit and handcuffs. He went and sat down.

“Damianos,” he said in an amused tone. “To what do I owe this pleasure to?”

Damen stared at him. “You are filth,” he said in a steady voice. “I cannot wait for you to be sentenced to spend the rest of your days rotting away,” he continued. “It’s what you deserve.”

“Ah,” he said with a smile. The bastard was smiling. He leaned in towards Damen. “Did he tell you?” He asked and Damen was not prepared for this. His heart pounded in his chest. “Does he remember it all?”

“You’re a sick fuck,” Damen said.

Mr. De Vere shrugged. “Maybe. But he never fought me. He never said no.”

“Shut up!” Damen said as he clenched his fists. “He was a child!”

“At 13? He was no child!” He let out a laugh. “Is that what he told you?” He shook his head. He looked Damen over. “I’ve assumed you’ve fucked him by now,” he said. “Doesn’t he look so pretty on his knees?”

Damen lost it. He lunged forward and wrapped his hands around Mr. De Vere’s neck. He didn’t know how long he had them around his neck, but when he finally fully became aware of his surroundings, four guards were in him and two were on the floor.

“Stop resisting!” Someone yelled at him.

“I’m not,” Damen said panting. “I’m not resisting.”

* * *

Damen was sitting outside the warden’s office. Auguste had been in there a while. Damen had been in handcuffs at first, but after Auguste had been called and he had talked to the warden, his wrists had been released. Mr. De Vere was long gone. They had been taken to the warden’s office.

Auguste finally stepped out. “Let’s go,” he said. Damen got up and walked out with him. They got in the car and began driving home. He didn’t know what Auguste had said or done so Damen hadn’t been in trouble over what he had done. He knew he should maybe thank him or at least ask him but he was emotionally spent. “Take me to my house,” Damen whispered. “To Miss Daisy’s house.”

Auguste nodded. “Wanna talk?”

“No,” Damen said. “I want to talk to Laurent but he made it clear I can’t. I know his cell phone doesn’t work. He deleted all his social media. I don’t have Halvik’s number. He broke up with me. He’s shut me out completely. All I did was love him!” 

Auguste sat quietly. “I’m sorry,” he said after a while. “Laurent... once he’s made up his mind -“

“I don’t care. I don’t want to think about it. I’m sorry Auguste but I want don’t want to think about you or your brother or your uncle for at least tonight.”

Auguste nodded. “I’m sorry,” he said again.

They rode in silence the rest of the way. Finally they pulled into Miss Daisy’s drive way. Damen got his luggage and Auguste was almost ready to leave when he saw Damen come towards him. He waited.

“I know you’ll be talking to him,” Damen said, eyes filled with tears and voice shaking. “Tell him I would have respected his wishes and not contacted him. He didn’t have to shut me out this way!” New tears filled his eyes. “Tell him I didn’t deserve this!”

Before Auguste could say anything back, Damen turned and walked back into his home, slamming the door shut behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn’t hear this song until almost two weeks after I had written the chapter but it just fit so well. 
> 
> [As It Was by Hozier](https://youtu.be/v7q-4mfl_s4)


	34. XXXIV

_May, Five Years Later..._

Laurent looked out the window of the office he was sitting in. He bit the inside of his bottom lip. A soft knock came and he looked up. He smiled at the friendly face walking in.

“Bonjour,” Dr. Cormier said softly as she walked in.

“Bonjour,” Laurent said, getting up and greeted her, they pressing their cheeks together and kissed.

They sat down facing one another. “Laurent,” she said smiling. “Our last time seeing each other!”

“Indeed,” Laurent said nodding. He swallowed.

“Let’s talk about it. How are you feeling?”

“Nervous,” Laurent said. “Excited. Overwhelmed.”

She nodded. “Who’s is picking you up?”

“Auguste and Erasmus,” he said.

“And you’re going back to the same home?”

“Yes. The first place he raped me was my room but then I switched rooms and I don’t go in there. Also, his room and his office which is a separate wing and I plan to demolish that.”

“You said,” she said nodding and taking notes. “And now, about your old room, remember what we said?”

“Yeah, I’m going to wait. Then when I do go in, I will have Auguste with me,” he said. “I’ll contact the lady who’s number you’ve given me. I’ll make sure I don’t do it until I’m about to see her. Or maybe I’ll make an afternoon appointment and go in that morning and then go see her that day.”

“Wonderful idea!” Dr. Cormier said with a smile. “Now,” she said and looked right at him. “Let’s talk about Damen.”

Laurent nodded. “Well, the last time Auguste and I talked he told me Damen has a girlfriend.”

Dr. Cormier nodded. “You are ready to date you know? You have made wonderful strides. You handle your PTSD and anxiety magnificently. You know when to reach out for help. You too can form a lasting romantic relationship.”

“I know,” Laurent said. “I’m just still in love with him. So I’m going to take my time. I will have a lot to process going back home and then I will start at the hotels the week after I land.”

“Ok,” Dr. Cormier said nodding. “Now being at work, if it triggers your anxiety -“

“It should be ok. I know lots of people will be shaking my hand and touching me, but with the job fairs I was going to with Vannes, I got a lot of that this past year. We were going to job fairs we weren’t even interested in just to have people shake my hand!” They laughed. “So in a professional sense, I have that under wraps.”

Dr. Cormier nodded. They spoke a while longer and finally when the session was over, they stood up and hugged. “You’re ready,” she said looking at him. “I don’t mean you will never need to speak to someone again, what I mean is, you are your own man. You, Laurent, the real YOU has come out and blossomed. I am very proud!”

“Thank you,” Laurent said with a wide smile.

“Don’t be a stranger, eh?”

“No! I won’t. Thank you for these last five years. Thank you, so so much.” Laurent said, hugging her tight.

* * *

Laurent was packing when a soft knock came to his door.

“Come in!” He called out. Vannes walked in. “Hey,” Laurent said grinning.

“Don’t grin you ogre, you’re leaving me!” She said pouting.”

“Aw, Vannes,” He said. “You’re gonna come visit end of June remember? We’re going to the Hamptons for Fourth of July! It’ll be amazing!”

Vannes sighed as she went and looked over all of the clothing Laurent was packing. She chuckled. “You’re going back with a brand new wardrobe!”

“Merci, Paris!” He said.

Vannes looked at him. “Will you go looking for Damen?” She asked.

Laurent shrugged and folded more clothes. “Don’t think his girlfriend will appreciate it,” he said.

“Oh, please the second he sees you, he will drop her and get back with you!” Vannes said. 

“Wishful thinking!” Laurent replied.

“Not when people are meant to be together,” Vannes replied. “Although you’ll be leaving lots of admirers here!” Laurent laughed. “And you never dated anyone else. Never even kissed anyone else!” Vannes said in amazement.

“Because that’s not what I came here for, Vannes,” Laurent replied.

“I know, love,” she said. She sighed again. “God I’m gonna miss you!”

* * *

Saying bye to Halvik and Vannes was hard and many tears were shed. They had become his family and had been so wonderful to him. “Call me when you land,” Halvik said. “We are always here for you.”

“I know. Thank you,” Laurent said.

He looked at the window, now, at the sky. He couldn’t help it and his mind wandered to Damen as it always did when he was quiet. He wished only for Damen to be happy. If this girl he was with was who he was meant to be with, Laurent would not get in the way.

* * *

Laurent stepped off the plane and saw Auguste and Erasmus. Auguste had flown to France as often as he could. The last time he had seen Erasmus was two years ago, when Auguste has brought him to France for 10 days. There, Laurent had told him everything. He had also told him of why he and Damen had broken up.

“And I know what I’m about to ask of you may be hard but, please, you cannot tell Nikandros.” Erasmus had nodded at Laurent through his tears. “This is something I may tell someone I’m in a romantic relationship with or others I trust and I don’t mean I don’t trust Nik -“

“Laurent, you don’t have to explain,” Erasmus has said softly. And that had been that.

Now at the airport they embraced each other again. “Welcome home!”

“Thank you!” Laurent squeezed him hard. He then hugged Auguste.

After gathering his luggage, they began to make their way to Erasmus’s home.

“I can’t wait for you to see it! I know I sent tons of pics of the kitchen and bottom bedroom remodels. I know you want to do work on your home. I’ll send you the number to my guy. He’s awesome!” Laurent grinned. “My mom will be so happy to see you!”

Laurent furrowed his brow. “Will Nikandros be ok seeing me?”

“You have been and always will be my best friend,” Erasmus said.

“I’m sure he cares for his best friend too. I don’t want to cause any problems.”

“Nik and Damen are big boys. They can handle themselves.”

Laurent chuckled. “Ok,” he said.

When they reached Erasmus’s home, they got out and Laurent went to see Erasmus’s mom. She hugged him tightly and lightly ran her hands through his hair. He trimmed it but it was still to his shoulders. He liked it that way.

“Look at you, a grown man now,” she said with a soft smile. “Just add some wings and you’d look just like an angel,” she said.

Laurent put his arm around her and laid his cheek on her head. He remembered when Damen used to call him angel.

* * *

Auguste and Laurent finally made it home. They pulled in front of the house and began to unload the luggage. The staff came out soon enough and began to help. Mrs. Paschal came out and greeted him with a warm hug.

“Look at you! My goodness you even grew some more!” She said chuckling.

“Good to see you! Thank you so much for taking care of my home for me!” Laurent said.

“Oh my! That voice!” She said.

Laurent laughed. He looked around and shook hands with all his staff. He turned to Mrs. Paschal. “Where’s Eloise?” He asked. He had always wondered if this was the girlfriend Damen had acquired.

“Oh! She married a man that manages a grocery store in town. She has a baby now! Stay at home mom!”

“Oh, good for her!” Laurent said nodding.

Auguste and Laurent made their way upstairs. Laurent had decided he would take the master bedroom. He had ordered a new bed. He would deal with the rest later.

“So,” Auguste said. “How you feeling?”

“Ok!” Laurent answered as he nodded. “Not as overwhelmed as I thought I would be, but...” he trailed off. 

Auguste nodded. “He’s teaching at the middle school,” he said. “Just so you know.”

“Ok,” Laurent said. He looked around. The sun was beginning to set. “I’m pretty tired,” he said.

“Of course,” Auguste smiled. He came over and hugged him tightly. “I’m glad you’re back, brother.”

“Glad to be back,” Laurent closed his eyes and squeezed Auguste tightly.

“Call me anytime. Ada will want to throw you a welcome back party. But no rush.” Laurent laughed. “But come over for dinner sometime soon, ok?”

“Ok,” Laurent said.

“Ok. Talk to you soon.”

“Alright. Thanks Auguste.”

“Don’t mention it, little brother,” Auguste said and showed himself out.

* * *

The following day, Laurent’s first stop was to get himself a cellphone. It took longer than he anticipated. When it was finally done he sat in his car and programmed Auguste’s and Erasmus’s phone numbers and texted them. He still remembered Damen’s phone number. He wondered if it was the same. He swallowed.

Laurent tapped his thumb on the steering wheel. He knew a place he wanted to go. He looked at the time. 2:51 pm. It was Friday. He figured it was safe. He wanted to do this. He stopped and got some flowers first then he took off for Miss Daisy’s home. He remembered the way. He had driven it so many times with Damen. The memory brought a smile to his face. The streets were mostly the same and when he turned into her street his stomach flip flopped. He pulled into her drive way.

He got out and grabbed the flowers and rung her doorbell. He loved the look on her face when she opened the door.

“Laurent!”

“Yes!” Laurent said hugging her and giving her the flowers. She felt even tinier than he remembered.

“Oh! My sweet boy, come in! Come in!”

Laurent walked in. Everything was exactly as he remembered. The floral sofa and loveseat. He caught sight of the door to Damen’s old room. He walked into her kitchen.

“Sit! Sit!” She said. Laurent sat. “Let me fix you some hot chocolate!” She said and made herself busy doing it. Talking about the new priest at church and the neighbors who are always stealing each other’s newspapers.

Laurent smiled as he looked around. The stove was as shiny as ever and he felt so at peace. Comforted. Happy. Laurent listened and chatted with Miss Daisy for a good while. He looked at the time on the stove and realized he had been there for an hour and a half almost. He wondered when he should be leaving when he heard a car door slam in the drive way. Miss Daisy didn’t even seem to notice she kept chatting. Then he heard the unmistakable sound of the front door open.

“Hey, who’s car is that in the driveway?” A voice called out.

Laurent’s stomach clenched and his heart stopped. The voice was a bit deeper but he would recognize it anywhere. Suddenly, into the kitchen, walked Damen. The world stopped.

Laurent stood up. He suddenly looked down at what he was wearing. He had on black jeans and sneakers with a navy blue loose tank top and a dark gray cashmere cardigan which was open. His hair was loose.

Damen was in a baby blue button up and navy tie. It was snug on his muscular chest and biceps. The sleeves rolled up to the elbows. He had gray slacks, which looked great on his muscular legs and black dress shoes. He looked like a teacher. His hair still a bit long, brown waves and curls around his ever handsome face. He had medium stubble and then Laurent looked into his rich brown eyes. They were as beautiful and as soft as ever.

“Laurent,” He said bewildered.

“Can you believe he’s finally back!” Miss Daisy said. She got up and got his mug from the table. “Now I’m about to start cooking. You two have a lot to catch up on, so go ahead!” She said.

Laurent stared at Damen. “Oh, uh, um, well, I didn’t mean to intrude,” he began.

“Oh nonsense! You two go catch up!” She said cheerfully.

“Yeah!” Damen said with a smile and a quick squeeze to Miss Daisy. He walked into the living room and Laurent followed. He then saw Damen walk to the front door and open it. He followed. Once outside Damen walked away from the home and onto the front lawn. Laurent stood still for a moment. He wasn’t sure if Damen needed space and was trying to get away from him.

Damen suddenly looked back and they stared at each other. Laurent took a deep breath and walked to Damen. He was just going to be honest.

“Damen, I am so sorry. I wanted to see her and I just remembered you would only come on the weekends so I -“

“When did you get back?” Damen asked.

“Yesterday,” Laurent answered.

“Are you back for good?”

“Yes,” Laurent nodded.

They looked at each other. “Came to visit on the weekends? That was when I used to live with you,” Damen reminded him. “How did you know I didn’t live here? Have you asked around?” 

Laurent swallowed. “No. I just assumed. I’m sorry I wasn’t thinking.” Damen stayed quiet. “Do you still live here?” 

“No, I have an apartment in town,” Damen told him. “I come home for dinner several times a week.”

Laurent nodded. “I can go, I honestly -“

“No. No, stay,” Damen replied and looked into Laurent’s eyes. “She’s missed you. Lots. I told her you stayed in France for school. She always asked me how you were and I always said good.”

Laurent nodded. “Ok,” he said. 

“You look good,” Damen said. He bit his bottom lip and looked away.

“So do you. You look wonderful. The teacher look really suits you,” Laurent said smiling.

Damen looked back at him and Laurent’s smile faltered. “I’ve began to pay you back.”

Laurent nodded. “Yes, I saw thank you.”

“No need to thank me. That was the arrangement.”

“Right,” Laurent replied.

They stood quiet a moment. Laurent had so much to say. So much. He wasn’t even sure where to begin, and he didn’t even know if Damen wanted to hear all of it. “Nik and Erasmus bought a home a few months ago,” Damen said, as if he wasn’t sure how to approach Laurent either. 

“Yeah! Saw it yesterday,” Laurent said with a small smile. Damen gave him a confused look. “Oh, Erasmus came with Auguste to the airport to pick me up,” Laurent informed Damen.

“You’ve been talking to Erasmus?” Damen asked.

“Yes,” Laurent replied.

“Since when?”

Laurent looked right into Damen’s eyes. He wanted to be nothing but honest. Damen deserved it. “For about two years. He came and saw me in France -“

“Wow!” Damen exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. “Wow. Who else? Huh? Who else got to see you?”

Laurent looked down at the ground. He hated how hurt Damen sounded. “Just him. Just him and Auguste.”

Laurent looked up and met Damen’s eyes. His eyes looked pained. Damen rubbed his face with his hands. “I’m sorry,” he said apologetically. “I had no right to question you like that.” He looked away.

“It’s alright I understand,” Laurent replied with a small smile. Damen looked his way and after a moment he gave him a small smile too. Laurent’s smile broadened. The tension felt to ease up. There had never been anyone that had made Laurent feel as at ease as Damen had. That was a fact. “Wow. Teacher. That’s awesome.”

Damen let out a laugh. It sounded great. It made Laurent feel great. It was as if he could breathe again. “I love it. I have you to thank for that.” 

Laurent grinned. “Oh you would have found a way to make it happen, Damianos. You are an _amazing_ man.” 

Laurent saw how Damen seemed to really like the compliment. There was no hiding behind a facade for Laurent anymore. Not with Damen at least. “Thank you,” Damen said with a wonderful smile. 

Laurent had to look away. The urge to touch Damen was incredible. He fisted his hands. 

“You look really good. I always wondered if you had cut your hair or not.” 

Laurent looked back at him and chuckled. “Not yet,” he said with a wink. Damen grinned. “You like it long?” He asked.

Damen rolled his eyes. “You’re perfect. I’d like your hair any way you would have it.”

Laurent couldn’t help the fluttering of his heart and he felt his cheeks warm. He wanted this so badly. Maybe Damen did too? But he had a girlfriend, Laurent recalled. A girlfriend. Before he could stop himself Laurent blurted it out. “So, heard you got a girlfriend.”

Damen froze. “Erasmus told you?”

“Was it a secret?” Laurent asked trying to keep the atmosphere light.

“No. Just wondered why you would bother to talk about me, is all.” Damen shrugged. “Anytime you wanted to know anything about me, you could have picked up a phone. My number never changed. I made sure my number _never_ changed.”

Laurent nodded slowly. He knew Damen would be angry and he had a right to be.

“Boys!” They both turned to the door. “Come on in! I made a quick stir fry!”

* * *

With Miss Daisy controlling the conversation during dinner, Damen and Laurent had no chance to dwell on the tension between them and eventually they both truly loosened up and laughed and joked around and it felt a lot like those weekends they used to spend there together years ago.

Everyone once in a while Laurent would glance over at Damen and more often than not, Damen was looking at him. Laurent couldn’t help it, it made him happy and it made him smile. He had spent years working on feeling safe enough to show emotion, that hiding it behind a facade now seemed counter productive so he let his joy show. Damen seemed to respond positively to it and seemed to grow happier himself.

Eventually though, the dinner came to end and when it was almost 9, Laurent made himself get up and make to leave.

“Well you need to promise me you’ll come back. Like you used to! You two have to come and spend some weekends with me like you use to! Don’t you Damen?” 

Damen looked surprised. “Yeah!” He said and seemed to not want to delve into the subject any further.

Laurent gave Miss Daisy one last hug, thanked her for the hundredth time and then walked out, Damen behind him.

“I’m sorry about that,” Damen said as Laurent slowed so Damen could step beside him. 

“What? Miss Daisy inviting me to your bedroom on the weekends?” Laurent said with a chuckle.

“Yes! Sorry!”

Laurent shook his head. He spread his arms and stretched. “Doesn’t she know you’re dating someone?” Laurent asked and looked at Damen sideways. 

He noticed how Damen’s eyes lingered over his body. “She’s met her. Guess she just let me know she wishes I replace you with her.”

“Oh you’ve brought her on the weekends here too?” Laurent asked and immediately felt mortified that he asked. “Oh fuck. Damen. Don’t answer that! That is absolutely none of my business!” 

Damen chuckled, hands in his pants. He looked down at the ground. “It’s alright,” he said nonchalantly. “And no. Never brought her for the weekend. Only people that have ever slept in that room of mine are you and I.” 

Laurent nodded. He knew it was silly, but a part of him felt happy about that. “Ok,” he said with a small smile. 

“So? Any plans this weekend?” Damen asked.

Laurent chuckled. “Nope. Laundry maybe?” Damen laughed. Laurent grinned.

Damen looked straight into Laurent’s eyes. “How about dinner then?” Laurent stared back. There was no hesitation in Damen’s voice.

“Alright,” Laurent said with a nod. His heart was racing.

“Ok, text me your number when you get home tonight.” 

“Ok,” Laurent said smoothing his hair back behind his ears.

Damen raised his eyebrows. “Don’t you need my number?” 

“No, I still remember it,” Laurent said.

Damen gave him a gorgeous smile. “It was great seeing you Laurent. Glad you’re back,” he said.

Laurent couldn’t help but grin back just as widely. “Great seeing you too. Glad to be back,” he said. “I’ll text you.”

“Ok. Bye!” 

“Bye!” Laurent said and climbed back into his car. He watched as Damen walked back to the front door. He turned and they waved and Laurent turned cranked up his car and started making his way home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Darlings!  
> I won’t be posting in the week coming because my birthday is coming up and I’m taking sometime to myself!  
> As always: thank you for continuing to read this story! It means so much to me that you’ve enjoyed it and I love bringing it to life!  
> So no new chapter the week coming but I’ll be back to posting beginning Sunday March 17!  
> Hugs to you all! <3


	35. XXXV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Damen tries to wrap his head around the fact that Laurent is back..._

Damen woke up Saturday morning. Laurent had indeed texted him his cellphone number the night before. His heart began to beat erratically when it all rushed back to him. Laurent. _His_ Laurent. A bit taller and broader and handsome as ever. Damen could close his eyes and remember how soft his skin was. How he enjoyed the slow and soft kisses to his neck, and, of course, how it felt to be inside him.

He laid in bed thinking about this as the sun got brighter. He finally got up, showered and dressed. He had questions and he needed answers.

* * *

It was about 10:15 am when he pulled in front of Nik’s and Erasmus’s home. Erasmus was a nurse and Nik was an accountant. Damen knew every Saturday morning Nikandros spent the morning doing paper work for clients from his home office since Erasmus always worked early on Saturdays. Damen had a key to their home and let himself in. He turned left and made a bee line to Nik’s office. It was open and Nik looked up as Damen walked in.

“Hey bro!” He said holding out his left hand for a fist bump which Damen matched. “What’s happening.”

“Oh, not much,” Damen said with a shrug. He had a black tee shirt and leather jacket on, dark stone washed jeans and black high tops. “Just the usual, went to Miss Daisy’s for dinner yesterday and I turn the corner and Laurent is sitting there having hot chocolate in the kitchen. That’s all.”

Nikandros looked up at Damen, eyes wide. It took a few seconds for him to see how angry Damen was. “Ok. Bro, listen to me -“

“No!” Damen exclaimed, slamming his palms on the wood of Nik’s desk. “No. _You_ listen to _me_! I know Erasmus has been in contact with him for two years, why didn’t you tell me? You knew Erasmus went and saw him! You _knew_! How could you not tell me!”

Nik stood up and walked around his desk. He grabbed Damen’s shoulders. Tears were sliding down Damen’s face, he couldn’t help it. Nik was a mixture of anger and helplessness. “Because of this!” Nik said pointing at Damen’s face. “Guy has been back less than 48 hours and he already has you crying!”

Damen pulled back and shook his head. “Whatever man, you don’t know -“

“No I don’t. But I know you and Erasmus know. You don’t wanna tell me? Fine. _Don’t_. But don’t think I was going to willingly feed you little snippets of his life when it took you years to get over him! _Years_ to be happy again!”

Damen scoffed and shook his head.

“I was there Damen! I saw the shell of yourself you became! And finally, _finally_ , it seems you’re moving forward. You started teaching and met Jokaste and now you’re dating!”

Damen squeezed his eyes shut till he saw stars. He opened them again. Right. Jokaste. “Do you remember what you said to me when you met her?” Damen asked. Nikandros stayed quiet. He did remember and cursed himself for his little outburst, he regretted it now. “You met her and then as soon as she walked off you turned to me and said ‘are you kidding me? She’s the female version of Laurent! Might as well be dating him!’”

Nik rolled his eyes. “Yes well that’s when I thought he would keep himself in France and not try to snake his way back into your life!”

“Don’t speak of him that way!” Damen said suddenly.

Nik closed his eyes. “Ok. Fine. So, he’s back. Now what?”

Damen shook his head. “He looked so good,” he said quietly.

“And Jokaste? What of her?”

Damen closed his eyes. Guilt ribboned through him... but... but... Laurent was back. _His_ Laurent.He looked up at Nik. Nikandros knew. He knew what that look meant.

“I want my objection noted!” Nikandros said as he returned to his desk and laptop.

“It’s noted,” Damen said.

* * *

Damen pulled into the driveway and looked at the small home in front of him. He felt... nervous. Anxious. What was he doing? What was he _doing_?

He was suddenly overwhelmed. Everyone knew Laurent was coming home except him and Laurent’s return affected him more than it affected anyone else. It was life altering for him. It was earth shattering. 

He finally got himself together and exited his car. He walked to the front door, ringing the bell. A few second passed and then it opened, Jokaste answered. “Hey!” She said.

She looked pretty as ever. Her golden curls falling around her. She had a floral sundress with a baby blue cardigan. Damen stepped inside and when she went to kiss him, he hugged her and kissed her forehead instead. Damen let out a breath. He could do this.

Jokaste looked up at him. “What’s wrong?” She asked confused.

Damen clenched his jaw. “Jokaste,” he said softly. Jokaste raised her eyebrows. “I’m sorry. I -“

“Save it,” she said looking annoyed. Damen shut his mouth. “This is unbelievable!” She said. She looked at him angrily. “I hope whoever it is that you’re in love with feels the same about you, because if they don’t, you’re fucked!” 

Damen actually chuckled. “Tell me about it,” he said. 

Jokaste pursed her lips together. She was angry. “I can’t believe I let it go this long,” she said angrily, wiping tears from her face. Damen looked her way. “We began to date in October, here we are in May and all we’ve done is kiss! We haven’t even slept together! You haven’t even groped my breasts for god’s sake!”

Damen stood frozen. “I’m sorry,” was all he could say. 

“No. It’s fine. Whatever. This should have happened long ago. You were never really committed. You never really wanted me. I was only a momentary replacement wasn’t I?!”

Damen stood frozen. He felt awful. “I’m sorry,” he repeated.

“Just leave!” Jokaste said and turned her back to him. Damen nodded. He walked to the door, opened it and left.

* * *

Damen’s next stop was the hospital. He didn’t really think of what he was doing here. He had nothing planned. He... he felt very overwhelmed. He walked in and looked around and went up to the second floor. He looked around and saw a group of nurses and suddenly he saw Erasmus walking by briskly.

“Erasmus!” He called suddenly and walked over to him.

To his surprise, Erasmus looked alarmed. “Damen! What’s wrong is Nik alright?”

Damen furrowed his brow. “Yeah, why wouldn’t he be?”

Erasmus gave him an exasperated look. “The last time you came rushing in here like this, you two had a ‘hold my beer’ moment and he ended up with broken ribs!”

Damen remembered. “Oh.. right. Sorry. No he’s cool. I’m alone, I...”

Erasmus’s eyes softened. “You heard Laurent is back?”

“I bumped into his yesterday, yeah,” Damen whispered. Erasmus nodded and rubbed Damen’s arm. “Does he still love me?” Damen asked and even he heard the supplication in his voice.

Erasmus gave him a sweet smile. “Aw, Damen,” Erasmus whispered.

“Erasmus!” Another nurse called. Erasmus looked back.

“I gotta go,” he said.

“Erasmus! I need to know!” Damen exclaimed. 

“Just ask him Damen! Go and ask!” 

And with that Erasmus was gone. Damen shook his head and left. Easier said than done.

* * *

Damen felt slightly lost. He knew he had asked Laurent to dinner and now he had broken up with Jokaste because how could he be with anyone else?! That wasn’t such a loss though... She was right, they had only kissed. Damen couldn’t bring himself to do more with her. With anyone. He suddenly wondered what Laurent had done in France. Had there been others? The thought hurt in such a deep way.... he sighed again.

He drove to a plaza near by. He needed a new shower curtain. When he had moved into his apartment Jokaste had gifted him a hideous bathroom mat and curtain set and now that she was never going to come over he could throw it out. He didn’t want a reminder of her every time he showered anyway.

He pulled out his phone as he walked into Bed, Bath & Beyond. He called Laurent.

“Hello?” His voice was so soft. Had Damen been imagining it? He had seemed so open the night before. He was happy, sad, vulnerable... it had been beautiful watching him and all these new emotions.

“Hi,” Damen said. He couldn’t hold back his smile. “Are you still up for dinner tonight?”

“Oh. Yes I am,” Laurent said.

“Were you busy?”

“No, just running a few errands now. We just never said if Saturday or Sunday but I’m up to it.” 

“Ok,” Damen said. His mind was racing. He wanted to speak to Laurent in a relaxed atmosphere. In a quiet, relaxed atmosphere. “How would you feel about a home cooked meal?” Damen asked.

There was a moment of silence. “You’ll cook for me?”

“Yeah,” Damen said smiling at the surprise in Laurent’s voice. He looked around the store. He finally found the shower curtains. He’ll start there and then find matching mats. “Don’t sound so surprised. I’ve been cooking for myself for several years now, and I really enjoy it and I think I’m really good at it if I may say so myself.” He still had a wide smile on his face. He began to look over the shower curtains. 

“You don’t have to go through the trouble of buying a brand new shower curtain for my visit though,” Damen heard on the phone and clearly behind him. He spun around.

Laurent stood there grinning. Damen couldn’t help but grin back. They hung up their phones chuckling.

“Leather jackets have always looked so good on you,” Laurent said with a slight tilt of his head. “The first day I met you were wearing a leather jacket.”

Damen nodded. “I remember,” Damen said. “You were all in black and playing your violin. You were playing A Song Without Words.”

Laurent nodded back. “I was,” he said. “The Song always makes me think of you.”

“Same here,” Damen said. “It reminds me of you.”

They were suddenly standing closer together. They had slowly gravitated towards each other without even noticing. Laurent tucked a loose golden strand behind his ear. His hair was up. Damen had always loved how that looked on him. He had a snug black turtle neck that hugged his slim figure, dark jeans, rolled up with his black combat boots. Damen wished to reach out and touch him. He balled his hands into fists to fight the temptation.

“What color is your bathroom?” Laurent asked.

“White,” Damen said turning back to the shower curtains.

“Would you like to add a splash of color or just subtle hints?”

Damen grinned. “I have no idea,” he said and they both laughed.

“Ok, do you want a busy and loud curtain or something more calm and soothing.”

“Oh, calm and soothing for sure,” Damen said.

Laurent nodded and started looking through the samples hanging. Damen merely gazed at him. He imagined them together and Laurent as his boyfriend again and here he was getting a new shower curtain for their bathroom. He liked this thought.

Laurent gasped. “Oh, look at this,” he said. It was a white curtain with a navy blue Greek pattern on the edges. “This is so you Damianos. Sleek. Greek. Sexy,” he said.

“Well, when you put it that way, how can I say no?” Damen said and found the package and picked it up. “I need mats too.”

“Get navy blue ones. Simple and nice and not too flashy at all. Masculine. Your bathroom will say: a real man showers here.”

Damen let out another laugh and Laurent grinned. It was beautiful how carefree Laurent seemed. Laurent had a large shopping bag over his shoulder and after getting a couple of mats, Laurent put them in his bag and took the shower curtain from Damen’s hands.

“Need anything else?” Laurent asked.

“No,” Damen replied and they made their way to the register. Once they began to check out, as Damen got his wallet, he saw Laurent was paying for his items. “Laurent!” He said.

“Hey, I missed the housewarming ok?” He said as he slapped Damen’s hand away from trying to get his things. The cashier giggled at this. “Plus you’re about to cook me dinner,” he said. He inserted his credit card on the keypad to pay.

Damen had a sudden idea. “Come with me to the grocery store. We can decide what to eat together.”

Laurent thanked the cashier and then glanced over at him. Damen thought he looked surprised. He grabbed all the bags. Laurent bit his bottom lip as they started to walk out the door. He was trying to decide and Damen truly loved how much emotion his face showed. He looked up and gave Damen a radiant smile. “Yeah, ok, we can do that.”

“Good,” Damen said as they stepped out into the parking lot. He felt lighter than he had in a long, long time.


	36. XXXVI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Damen was smiling; there was delight in seeing Laurent explore himself, a young man who was sweet, teasing, at times unexpectedly earnest. Having made the decision to let Damen in, Laurent had not gone back on it. When the walls went up, it was with Damen inside them._  
>  **The Summer Palace**  
>  \- C. S. Pacat

Laurent grinned as Damen picked out produce. “Is it always such serious business doing this?”

“Shh,” Damen said as he furrowed his brow. “They speak to me,” he said.

Laurent tried to suppress a grin, it failed. The next time Damen brought a green pepper to his ear, he leaned in. “Eat me, Damen!” He said.

Damen laughed and looked right into his eyes. “Do you know how dirty those words are coming from your mouth?” He asked with a half smile.

Laurent shook his head. “It’s your dirty mind that makes them dirty! Don’t blame your perversions on me!”

“Oh I will! You’re the only person on this earth that can make me have the dirty thoughts I have!”

“Your girlfriend won’t approve,” Laurent said as they walked further into the grocery store.

“I no longer have one, so...” Damen trialed off.

Laurent gazed up at him, mouth slightly open in surprise. When Damen turned to look at him, he shut it tight. His heart was racing. “Oh,” he said when he could finally speak. Damen was looking over the flank steaks. “Unexpected turn of events.”

“Indeed,” Damen said and he finally picked out the piece of flank steak he wanted. “Ok, we only need Greek yogurt. We got everything else.”

Laurent nodded and walked a little ahead of Damen.His mind was racing. Damen no longer had a girlfriend? He had one yesterday! He had said so at Miss Daisy’s... and now? Laurent looked at the Greek yogurt. He cleared his throat. “Any brand in particular?”

“No as long as it’s plain,” Damen said.

Laurent nodded and went back to concentrating on the Greek yogurt. Did Damen break up with her to be with him?! Could this be really happening?! Laurent grabbed a container and took it back to the shopping cart. He couldn’t meet Damen’s eyes.

“You alright?” Damen asked.

“Mmhmm,” Laurent said nodding.

“You’re blushing,” Damen said.

Laurent placed his right hand on his cheek. He could feel how warm his face was. “I’m pale. Any slight blush shows,” he said.

“Five years ago you wouldn’t have let yourself blush over many things.”

Laurent suddenly looked right into Damen’s eyes. “Five years ago I wouldn’t let myself indulge in many things I will let myself indulge in now,” he said proudly and Damen felt a huge smile spread on his lips.

“I love that,” he said.

“I do too,” Laurent replied. He loved how light he felt.

* * *

Laurent had followed Damen back to his apartment in his car. When Damen had unlocked the door and they had stepped in, Laurent’s wide eyes had looked everywhere. Damen felt slightly breathless at times when looking at Laurent. More so than ever. Not only because of his amazing beauty, but because his blue eyes had so much emotion. His pale cheeks seem to blush so much more easily and those beautiful lips would pout and smile and grin and he bit his bottom lip at times and look flustered. Looked shy. When Laurent looked shy it _killed_ Damen. He could feel himself melting. He was almost overwhelmed. Laurent and the wide range of feelings and emotions he was showing was intoxicating and... and Damen felt as if he was in a dream.

He always felt as if Laurent had built these thick walls around himself and his heart, careful to not let anyone in, which Damen couldn’t blame him for... But here, now, in the small kitchen of Damen’s apartment, as he cooked and Laurent made the tzatziki sauce, Damen suddenly and finally saw the change in Laurent.

Laurent had chatted away as Damen cooked. He found it entrancing. Laurent’s mouth was the most beautiful Damen had ever seen and as he talked and talked, Damen nodded and asked question. He was so happy just watching Laurent as he chatted away.

“There’s wine,” Damen had said and Laurent had popped the bottle open and poured a glass and sipped it and then had brought the glass to Damen’s lips and let him sip. Laurent crunched on a slice of green pepper, dish towel thrown over his shoulder as he talked.

“So my therapist, who was so wonderful,” Laurent had simply said and Damen froze.

“You saw a therapist?” He asked.

“Yes,” Laurent said. He looked a little shy at the moment. “I wanted to move past everything.” He looked at Damen. “Auguste told me about you going to see Uncle.”

Damen didn’t react. He kept cooking. He always feared the violent outburst would frighten Laurent.

“When Auguste told me how you had reacted I figured he had said something to you about me.”

Damen nodded. He would never repeat what was said. He suddenly felt Laurent’s hand on his forearm. Damen glanced his way.

“Thank you,” Laurent said softly.

Damen stared at him. “For what?”

Laurent look down shyly. “Well no one ever knew about it as it was happening but my 13 year old brain always wished for a knight in shining armor. For someone to come and stand up for me and fight for me and protect me,” Laurent said in a shaky voice. 

Damen turned off the stove. He was done cooking anyway. He moved the frying pan off the heat.He turned and faced Laurent, hands on his elbows.

“And when Auguste told me,” Laurent glanced up at him, his cheeks reddened. “And I mean you could have gotten in serious trouble. You knocked out two prison guards and it took four to subdue you and...” Laurent shook his head. “Thank you,” he said.

Damen felt his chest tighten. All these years he had waited for _this_. “Laurent I would go to then ends of the world for you,” he said. “I would sacrifice myself -“

“I would never ask you to.”

“I know,” Damen said. “That’s why I would do it. Behind that facade of yours was this kind, sweet, sensitive young man. I saw you in there. I always saw you.”

Laurent looked deep in Damen’s eyes. Damen could see all the emotion in them. “How?”

“Love’s just that way, I guess.”

They both froze. Damen was suddenly nervous he had said too much, but he couldn’t help it. He could never hide his feelings from Laurent. He just hoped what he had said wasn’t too much too fast.

“Damen,” Laurent said softly. “When I broke up with you,” he began. “I was scared. I -“

“I get it. I understand,” Damen answered. Laurent nodded. “Just... can you please never ever push me away ever again?” Laurent stared at him. “I want to help. I want to be the one you lean on, the one you confide in, the one you tell all your fears too. And then I want to take them away and comfort you. I want to be that man for you.”

Laurent raised his eyebrows. “Wow,” he whispered.

“We can take it as slow as you need. No pressure. I don’t... I don’t care about the physical part. I just... want to be part of your life and you a part of mine.”

Laurent’s eyes were wide. He felt the tears brim his eyes. “What did I ever do to deserve you?” He asked.

Damen smoothed a loose strand of golden hair behind his ear. “You deserve all the happiness in the world.”

They sat down to eat and had a good time. Laurent got seconds and he ate until he couldn’t anymore. “You’re an amazing cook!” He said. They had finished washing the dishes and walked over to the couch, Laurent pulled his right leg up to his chest, left leg dangling over the couch. He had taken his boots off when he had entered the apartment.

“My dad was too,” Damen said remembering and leaning his head on the back of the couch. “When I started doing it for myself I found it nice and relaxing. Just sucks sometimes, only cooking for one so I’m glad you let me cook for you.”

Laurent chuckled. “You can cook for me anytime.”

“Can I?” Damen asked softly.

Laurent looked over. “Yes,” he said.

They looked into each other’s eyes. Damen put a hand out in between then and Laurent slid his on top and they held hands.

“Can I ask you things?” Damen asked softly.

“Of course,” Laurent said furrowing his brow and looking down at their hands.

“You don’t have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable,” Damen whispered.

“Thank you, I’ll remember that,” Laurent whispered back.

“What made you go to therapy?”

“You,” Laurent said. They looked at one another. “I know I broke up with you and, as hard as it was at the time and even though I missed you daily it still felt like it was the right thing to do,” he continued. “But, I knew I needed help. I wanted to be happier and as much as I was doing it for me, being someone who would make you happy was also a large factor.”

Damen and they looked at one another. “It has helped a lot? Therapy?”

“Oh yes!” Laurent said. “It’s something that will always be a part of my life. I have the number to someone here to talk to.”

“Good,” Damen said smiling at him.

“But yes, it... it’s helped me deal with a lot. So much.”

Damen sat up, still holding Laurent’s hand. Laurent hugged his leg. “May I hold you?” He asked, voice thick with emotion.

Laurent beamed at him, it melted Damen’s heart. He slid forward and leaned into Damen. He placed his head on Damen’s shoulder and wrapped his arms around him and Damen too wrapped his arms around him. They sat there, peacefully, holding one another. Damen rested his cheek on Laurent’s head. They were in a comfortable silence.

Damen turned and his lips landed on Laurent’s forehead. “You’ve always been so sweet and romantic,” Laurent said softly.

Damen chuckled. “You make me want to be sweet and romantic,” he replied.

Laurent turned into Damen a bit more and pressed his cheek on his shoulder. “So did you break up with your girlfriend to be with me?”

Damen’s stomach clenched. “Yeah... I’m pretty sure I did.”

Laurent grinned. “Well, honestly I didn’t come back here to turn your life upside down. That was never my intention.”

“It’s ok,” Damen said. He ran his right hand down Laurent’s arm. “She... when Nikandros met her he gave me a speech about her being a female version of you.”

Laurent furrowed his brow. He lifted his head and looked into Damen’s eyes. “Does she really look a lot like me?”

“I don’t know,” Damen said letting out a breath. “And I really don’t want to talk about her at all.”

Their faces were close together and they gazed at each other’s eyes and lips. Laurent felt his heart pounding in his chest. It felt good and natural and right. They leaned in and kissed softly. It was just as it had been years ago, maybe even better.

Laurent hummed softly and leaned in closer, opening his mouth. Damen felt as if he was in heaven. He opened his eyes a moment and saw Laurent, eyes closed, felt him lean in and his mouth part... Damen felt Laurent’s tongue graze his lip. He turned his body, bending his left knee up on the couch and he felt Laurent wrap his arms around his neck.

There was a bit more moving around and then Laurent was on his lap. Left knee over Damen’s right thigh, his right leg round Damen’s body on the couch. Damen’s lips travelled down the left side of Laurent’s jaw. Down, slowly, softly, gently, then began to travel down Laurent’s neck. He pulled the turtle neck down, exposing the pale skin underneath.

There was a soft moan that escaped Laurent’s lips and Damen felt a thrill go through him. His arms wrapped around Laurent’s waist. He continued administering the soft, slow kisses he knew Laurent liked. He remembered this, as did his body. It felt as if it was just yesterday that he had done this for the first time, and still he felt that ribbon of fear, one wrong move and Laurent would run away.

But Laurent wasn’t going anywhere, if anything he was getting getting closer, leaning closer, wanting no space between them. He kissed Damen’s neck softly as well and breathed out, a relaxed breath. “Feels so good,” Laurent said in a soft voice. 

Damen released the turtle neck and they gazed at each other. He kissed Laurent softly. He couldn’t help it. “I love you,” he said.

Laurent’s eyes softened and he reached up and softly scratched the stubble on Damen’s jaw. He glanced at his lips and then back up to his eyes. “I love you too,” he said.

* * *

Laurent climbed back into his car. He shut the door, grinning. He took his phone out and called Erasmus.

“Hello?” He sounded groggy.

“Oh shit, did I wake you?”

Erasmus chuckled. “No. I was dozing off though, but I wasn’t sleep. What’s up?”

Laurent looked out at Damen’s building and grinned again. “I had dinner at Damen’s place.”

Erasmus gasped. “He came to the hospital earlier! He was asking me if you still loved him! I felt like I was going to die! I almost called you, but I figured I would let you two figure it out.”

Laurent laughed. “He called me and we bumped into each other at Bed, Bath and Beyond. Then we went grocery shopping and he took me to his apartment and he cooked dinner for us. He said he broke up with his girlfriend.”

Erasmus gasped. “No way! He did it to be with you!”

Laurent grinned. “I can’t believe this. I dreamt and wished of this and now it’s happening! It’s slightly insane!”

“Yes!” Erasmus said giggling.

Laurent sighed. “Insane in the best type of way.”

“Hey! Actually I’m glad you called. Tomorrow why don’t you come over for lunch? It’ll be so awesome. I’m off and Nik is off. Bring Damen. It’ll be like high school when we use to double date!”

Laurent grinned. “Ok! What time and what can I bring?”

“Come over like 1 pm. Bring dessert.”

“Great. I can’t wait!”

* * *

Laurent pulled into his garage and walked into his home. He was making himself do this because he never used to before. He had to walk past his uncle’s old office as he walked into the main house. It was just a room and it couldn’t hurt him. Plus, he would tear it down. These rooms would exist no more soon enough.

He walked upstairs and brought the bag of things he had bought earlier to the bathroom in the master bedroom. He changed into a tee shirt and shorts and called Damen.

“Hey,” Damen answered.

Laurent grinned. “Hey.”

“You know, if you were gonna miss me this much already, you should have just spent the night.”

Laurent chuckled as he sat crossed legged in the middle of his bed. He shook his head. “I’m calling cause Erasmus has invited us for lunch tomorrow. He said for us to arrive around 1 pm.”

“Great. I’ll pick you up at 12:40.”

“Ok,” Laurent said.

“So you only left about 45 minutes ago. Did you call Erasmus to tell him about us the moment you left?”

Laurent felt his face warm. “Maybe...”

Damen laughed. “Good. Good. I’m happy. That makes me happy.” Laurent smiled. “You know what else makes me happy?” Damen asked.

“What?”

“How open you are,” he replied. “How you’re showing so much emotion.”

“That’s something I’ve worked on,” Laurent explained. “You make me feel safe and I can let you in and see me. Without a facade.”

“It’s beautiful to see Laurent.”

“Thank you,” Laurent said. He let out a sigh. “Ok, well I’m going to go to sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Ok,” Damen said. “Good night, sweet dreams.”

“Night,” Laurent said. “I love you.”

Laurent heard Damen chuckle and he could hear the smile in his voice when he answered. “I love you too.”


	37. XXXVII

Erasmus had said desert but Laurent wasn’t sure what type so at breakfast he had told his cook he wanted a pie, a small cake and a crème caramel.

He then showered and wondered what to wear. He put on light blue jeans and a white knit cardigan with a baby blue shirt underneath. Once he was dressed he made two simple braids on the side of his head, above his ears bringing them together on the middle back of his head. This was a hairstyle Vannes always did on him. It was slightly young, but Laurent figured at 22 he could still pull it off.

Damen had texted him and said he would be there in 15 minutes. He was waiting and finally saw him arrive they loaded the desserts into the back seat and took the short drive to Nikandros’s and Erasmus’s place.

“You look wonderful,” Damen said as they arrived and he parked. Damen leaned in and gave Laurent a soft, sweet kiss. Laurent felt butterflies in his stomach, Damen did that to him. 

Laurent grinned and looked at Damen, he had a gray hoodie that was just snug enough on him to see his muscular chest and arms. His faded black jeans were ripped at the knee.

They exited and gathered the desserts and Laurent saw Damen pull out a key and stepped inside. Laurent followed him as they made their way to the kitchen.

“Bro!” Laurent heard as they walked in and Laurent watched Damen and Nikandros embrace. Nikandros’s eyes then landed on Laurent. He didn’t react. He pulled back and took the cake from Damen’s hands. “Bro, do me a favor? Get those beers and take them out to the coolers pool side. Lazar and Pallas are coming as well as the rest of the guys from Sigma Chi.”

“Great!” Damen said with a huge grin. He grabbed the beer and gave Laurent a wink and stepped outside.

Laurent took a deep breath in and out. “So Damen was in a fraternity?” Laurent asked Nikandros, trying to be friendly and casual.

“We were yeah,” Nikandros said taking the pie and crème caramel from Laurent. He looked into Laurent’s eyes. “He did a lot of stuff you missed out on, since you dumped him and disappeared from his life.”

Laurent nodded. He knew this scenario with Nik was a possibility and Laurent wasn’t surprised. “Yes,” he said. “We -“

“We?” Nikandros scoffed. “Already? Must be nice Laurent. My best friend will so quickly readjust his life so you can swoop in and just assume your place on your throne. Running his life must be nice.”

“Damen is his own man, I -“

“Yeah you can save it. I don’t care much of what you have to say. Just when you’re all cute and cuddly, ask him about how many sleepless nights he spent crying. Ask him how long it took him to do more than go between his classes and home. Oh and while you’re at it, ask him how much weight he lost, how long it took him to finally do simple shit like his laundry and clean his room.”

Laurent stood wide eyed looking at Nikandros.

“And if he won’t tell you, because I know him and I’m sure he won’t and if you got the balls to hear it, come and ask me. I’ll be more than glad to share every single detail of the last five years with you.”

“Hey, sweetie!” Erasmus called out as he walked into the kitchen. He suddenly stopped and looked between them. “Nikandros!” Erasmus said easily reading the situation. 

“No, it’s ok,” Laurent told Erasmus who huffed and gave Nikandros a disapproving look.

Damen suddenly walked in and picked up on the tension as well. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Laurent said with a smile but turned away from Damen slightly. He felt his face was hot. This time with shame. He knew Nikandros has been telling him the truth.

Nikandros walked to the fridge grabbed the tray with meat he had left marinating. “Damen, grab the chicken for me please. Let’s get grilling.”

Damen did and flashed Laurent a smile, which Laurent returned. Damen then gave him a kiss and then followed Nikandros out the door.

“Laurent I’m sorry! What did Nik say?”

Laurent turned and smiled at Erasmus. “Don’t be angry Erasmus. I’m glad Damen has a friend like Nikandros. Loyal.”

Erasmus nodded and sighed. “I wanted it to be just the four of us but suddenly this morning Nikandros called their frat brothers. I hope you don’t mind?” Erasmus said.

“No! It’s alright. They’re Damen’s friends too.”

“Yeah,” Erasmus said. “They’re... a crazy bunch that’s for sure!” Laurent nodded. The weight of the years he has missed suddenly felt heavy upon him.

“But they’re all good friends. That’s all that matters,” Laurent said.

Erasmus nodded and they both began making the various side dishes Erasmus had planned for the bbq. Laurent had wanted to speak to Erasmus about the years he was gone, what Damen had gone through. He knew Erasmus would be honest with him. They didn’t have the chance though. The door bell rang as Laurent and Erasmus had just started preparing side dishes. Damen answered the door and a group of guys came into the kitchen. Damen was quickly by Laurent’s side. He held him close as he introduced him so there was no mistaking who Laurent was to Damen. 

Every one was kind and Laurent got a few soft punches to the shoulder which was not up against Damen. Soon enough there were six other guys in the home. Walking in and out of the kitchen and milling outside around the pool. The camaraderie was obvious. They all knew and were very friend with Erasmus, many complementing the home. They had seen the way Damen had wrapped his arm around Laurent and so were also treating him as if they had known him years.

They were to eat outside, and Erasmus and Laurent brought out the things they had prepared once Nik and Damen had finished grilling. They all sat around and Damen surprisingly leaned in and gave Laurent a kiss right on the mouth. He felt his tongue trace his bottom lip. Some of the guys cheered. Laurent was a little taken aback. He tried to focus on eating as he was asked lots of questions and finally everyone found out that Laurent and Damen had dated in high school, Laurent had gone to France for school and he had come back and they had reconnected.

Laurent though, never uttered his last name and of course the real reason of why he had broken up with Damen was also left out. For a moment, Laurent wondered if Nikandros was going to say anything, but he ignored the whole conversation regarding Laurent. What Laurent noticed more than anything was how happy Damen was. This meant more to Laurent than anything else has. 

After everyone had eaten, Laurent made the comment that he and Damen brought desert and Laurent went inside to get it. Damen went in with him.

“Hey, you alright?” He asked, taking Laurent’s face in his hand.

“Yeah!” He said giving Damen a wide smile.

Damen grinned back. “You sure?” He asked caressing Laurent’s cheek. “We can tell each other anything.”

Laurent sighed. That was very true. He thought of all he had worked through the last five years. He didn’t want it all to be for nothing. “It’s a bit overwhelming, but not in a bad way,” Laurent told Damen. He placed his palms flat on Damen’s chest. “Lots of new people and it’s obviously all these men who are strangers to me mean so much to you and I’m just trying to find my place in all this.”

“Your place is right by my side,” Damen said.

“Oh course it is,” Laurent whispered softly.

Damen leaned in and kissed his forehead. “We’re spending tomorrow together right?” Damen asked softly. 

Laurent furrowed his brow. “But don’t you have to work? It’s Monday.”

“It Memorial Day, Laurent,” Damen said chuckling.

“Oh! Right!” Laurent couldn’t believe he had completely forgotten. A wild idea formed in his head. “What if,” Laurent began as he pulled Damen closer. “When we leave here, we pass by my home and I can get an overnight bag and go back to your place? I can spend the night! We can watch movies and talk.”

Damen looked at Laurent with huge smile. “I think that sounds amazing!” He said.

“Quit making out and bring us dessert!” A voice came from the backyard.

Damen laughed and he and Laurent got the desserts out and took them outside. Laurent watched Damen and loved how incredibly happy he looked.

* * *

There was lots of talk amongst the friends. Laurent looked and smiled but didn’t really join in. They spoke of memories, past Memorial Days, Fourth Of July’s and even Christmases they spent together and, of course, Erasmus had been a part of everything too. He was like an honorary frat brother, so they said. There was an incident where Nikandros had broken some ribs which made many of them laugh, including Damen. Laurent glanced his way. Damen was having a great time, he could tell. It was slightly strange for Laurent. Everyone here was so close... he sighed.

Damen glanced his way and squeezed his hand. Laurent grinned at him. He wasn’t going to ruin this moment for Damen.

* * *

Once everyone had left and it was just the four of them, they were in the kitchen finishing up the desserts Damen and Laurent had brought. Laurent felt a little better now that it was just them Damen, Nik, Erasmus and he. His anxiety level was a lot lower and he realized he had hoped he had made a good impression with Damen’s circle of friends, this was all new to Laurent. In high school it had always been all the other kids wanting to make sure they made a good impression with him. In France life was simpler. He was a nobody and he wasn’t looking to make friends or get a lover and so socially he felt extremely free.

Damen and Laurent sat in stools at the kitchen island. They were as close as they could be, with Damen’s arm around Laurent’s waist. Laurent was feeding the both of them and he leaned in close to Damen. He loved how warm Damen felt.

“You guys feel like doing anything tomorrow?” Nik asked without looking at Laurent.

“We got plans,” Damen said and Nik nodded. He kissed Erasmus and held him close. Laurent gazed at them. It was so obvious they were in love. Laurent had always struggled with showing affection. He suddenly felt Damen nuzzling his neck, which tickled and Laurent happily realized that showing emotion was a lot more easy now. He sighed happily.

* * *

“So I mean at the end of the day, Nikandros had no one to blame but himself,” Damen told Laurent. He was sprawled on Laurent’s bed as Laurent folded some sleep clothes and another outfit to take to Damen’s apartment. “I did feel some fear though when we went to the hospital and Erasmus saw me. Everyone had bailed and I had to take Nik’s dumb ass to the ER cause I knew had broken ribs.” 

Laurent chuckled and sat beside Damen. He placed his hand in the middle of Damen’s chest, Damen covered it with his own hand.

“I want to hear all about these five years I missed,” Laurent said. “Promise you’ll fill me in on them.”

“Yes, I promise. Same with you ok?”

Laurent nodded. He caressed Damen’s chest with his thumb. “Will you... will you also fill me in about right after you came back from France? What you went through? How you felt?”

Damen furrowed his brow and gave Laurent a strange look. “That would be torturous for me to tell and you to hear. Why the heck would we wanna go there?” 

Laurent took a moment to chose his words carefully. “I know it was an incredibly hard time for you and I wish for us to move past it all.” They looked into each other’s eyes. “The best way to do that is to be completely honest with each other. Any anger or hurt you feel, you can -“

“Laurent, any anger or hurt I feel is not directed at _you_ , ok? It’s all _him_!” Laurent saw the physical reaction Damen had to the words he had said. Laurent watched him as he sat up and clenched his fists and jaw. Damen closed his eyes and let out a ragged breath. He bent his legs, placing his feet flat on the bed and placed his forearms on his bent knees clasping his hands. He dropped his head forward. 

Laurent crawled towards him on the bed, unclasping his hands. Damen looked up. He lowered his legs and Laurent straddled him. He took Damen’s face in his hands, Damen placed his hands on the small ofLaurent’s back. Laurent gave him a soft kiss.

“It is something that happened to me, not who I am,” he said. Damen nodded, looking pained. “My uncle is a sick man. He was someone I should have been able to trust. Instead he used that trust against me and abused me.” 

Tears rolled down Damen’s cheeks but Laurent brushed them away with his thumbs. “I... I am so sorry,” Damen said.

“I know,” Laurent said softly. “You have a such a big heart and it hurts you to think about what I went through.”

“It does so much,” he said. He leaned forward and pulled Laurent closed. “I think about the pain and terror you must have felt and I wish nothing more than to take it all away and wished it had never happened.” Laurent heard him sniffling. “And sometimes I honestly wish to kill him.” 

Laurent held Damen tight. He knew Damen needed to let go of this too. “I understand.”

“I imagine you so young and innocent and that monster stealing your innocence away and...” Damen cried harder. Laurent held him close. He let Damen cry. Laurent had shed enough tears over this. He felt proud of the fact that he didn’t cry about it anymore and he felt strong knowing he was proving Damen comfort. He caressed Damen’s back as they held each other. Finally, Damen seem to calm down. They pulled apart slightly. Laurent reached for some tissue he had on his bedside table and gently wiped Damen’s face.

“Look at you,” Damen said smiling up at Laurent. His nose was red and eyes puffy. “I’m a mess and you’re so perfect.”

Laurent chuckled. “I have cried enough tears over what happened,” he said.

Damen nodded. He leaned back on the headboard. “I went to his sentencing,” he said.

“Did you?”

“Yeah and I sat right where he could see me.” Damen shook his head and swallowed. He looked back at Laurent. “I know he wasn’t paying for what he did to you but it felt good knowing he was going away for 37 years.” 

Laurent nodded. He remembered when he read about it. Auguste had come to France the day after and the lawyer had called Laurent the moment it had happened. That was the last day Laurent cried over anything related to his uncle. It almost felt like a new beginning. 

“There’s a good chance he’ll die in there,” Laurent said.

“Yes there is,” Damen said. He let out a breath. “But I don’t want our time together to be spent like this Laurent, crying about the past.”

“I know, baby,” Laurent said and he saw how Damen reacted to the word. Laurent lowered his gaze. He had sworn to not hold back. He would be affectionate and loving and romantic... all the things he felt he couldn’t be before. He would enjoy Damen in every way. He really wanted to. “I just want you to know that we can talk about anything. Actually,” Laurent said a bit more seriously as he looked into Damen’s eyes. “We _must_ talk about this. It’s important for my healing process. I don’t want to feel you’re holding on to a negative feelings because you are afraid it will upset me. Nothing will,” Laurent whispered. “We will take whatever negativity lingers, face and banish it. And we will be a much stronger couple because of it.”

Damen nodded. “Yes, ok,” he said. “I can do that.” 

“Good,” Laurent said. “I’m ready to go”

Damen grinned. “Let’s go then!”


	38. XXXVIII

They climbed into Damen’s car and began to make their way to his place. They had music playing and had easy conversation going. They stopped at the red light and Damen looked over at Laurent.

“So... what’s the dating scene like over in Paris?”

Laurent shrugged. “Wouldn’t know, I didn’t date.”

They glanced at each other. “Would it make me an asshole if I say I’m so fucking happy you didn’t date?” Damen asked. 

Laurent chuckled. The light turned green and they took off. “No, it wouldn’t,” Laurent said. “I kind of like the fact that you feel that way.”

Damen grinned. They turned into his apartment parking lot. “Well, Jokaste wasn’t anything serious,” he explained as he got Laurent’s bag and wrapped an arm around him.

“No?” Laurent asked.

“No, Laurent. You know this. I was always in love with you but I wondered if you would ever come back to me. I tried to move on but it failed. She was nice but really, she meant nothing.”

“Oh, good to hear,” a female voice came form out of nowhere. 

Laurent and Damen stopped and Laurent felt Damen squeeze him tight, as if protecting him. Laurent realized there was a woman leaning on a car in front of Damien’s building. She pushed off and went to her trunk. She took a box out. Damen let go of Laurent and took it.

“That’s all the teaching stuff you lent me. Thanks,” she said. She glanced at Laurent. She looked back at Damen. “I see you have a type,” she said. 

Laurent couldn’t deny how much looking at her reminded him of himself. She was shorter and her face was rounder and chin and nose more delicate but the resemblance was slightly uncanny. Her hair though was curly while Laurent’s was straight. She had it up with gold ringlets falling around her face.

They stared at each other. She said nothing and got back in her car and left. Laurent took his bag from Damen and then held his hand as they started walking into his building. They heard as Jokaste’s car drove past them. Laurent took a look back and then he looked and smiled at Damen. They entered his apartment. Damen dropped the box by the door as they took off their shoes. He looked at Laurent.

“I am so sorry,” he said.

“It’s ok,” Laurent said and stepped up to him, getting up on his toes to give him a soft kiss. “And she really does look like me,” Laurent said laughing.

“Fuck. She... Yeah when I saw you guys together. I saw it.” Damen widened his eyes slightly. “Ok, come on,” he said and grabbed Laurent’s hand. They went past the front door, to the right. Down a small hallway and into Damen’s room.

Laurent felt a small clench to his stomach. He looked around. This was Damen’s room. All his. It was a bit like how Laurent expected it. The walls were a nice warm beige. He had a king size sleigh bed that seemed to almost take up the whole room. There was a burgundy comforter with gold detailing on it. It looked so fluffy and comfortable.

“Your bed looks awesome,” Laurent said.

Damen chuckled. “Oh! Let me show you something!” Damen said enthusiastically. Laurent put his bag on the floor and slipped off his cardigan.

Damen returned, big smile on his face and Laurent’s eyes widened. He was holding up the baby blue shirt with the Eiffel Tower they had gotten in Paris. 

“Oh my god!” Laurent said laughing. “You kept it?!” Damen nodded. Laurent grabbed it. Without thinking he slipped off his own tee shirt and put the shirt on. He laughed. He undid his jeans and kicked them off. He turned. Damen had a stand up mirror and Laurent looked at himself then back at Damen. “Still huge as fuck!” He said.

Laurent looked at the way Damen’s eyes travelled over him. “You’re a bit taller so the shirt is a bit shorter on you,” Damen said. Laurent looked down at himself. “And I still love the way your legs look in this. You’re not as slim, you’re a bit more muscular now. God. You’re fucking beautiful.”

Laurent looked up into Damen’s eyes. He felt a thrill go through him. His whole body filled with goosebumps.

“You wore it the last night we spent together in Paris,” Damen continued. He was slowly walking closer to Laurent. “I held you all night, remember?”

“I remember,” Laurent whispered back.

“And I...” Damen shook his head. “There were days where I wished I had made love to you that night, but holding you felt so right. It felt like the perfect thing to do,” Damen confessed.

They were close now and Laurent stepped to Damen and wrapped his arms around him, he laid his cheek on his shoulder and buried his face in Damen’s neck.

“I don’t think there is a right or wrong in moments like that,” Laurent whispered. “I too, sometimes wished we had made love that night but so much was happening. We did what was right for us.”

“Laurent, you know there is no pressure. I will hold you tonight if you wish, and every night after for as long as you want.”

Laurent looked up at Damen. “I know baby,” he softly replied.

* * *

Laurent had slipped on some sleep shorts while Damen had quickly changed. Laurent had gazed at his body. It was gorgeous and muscular. Firmer now than 5 years ago. Damen was the most beautiful man Laurent had seen. He stayed shirtless. They walked back out to the living room and Laurent told him he wanted to watch a scary movie.

While Laurent looked through the movies, Damen made them popcorn and hot chocolate. Finally they settled down. Laurent pulled his right leg up and he looked on in surprise as Damen leaned down and kissed his knee. It warmed Laurent’s heart. Laurent leaned into Damen and they watched a couple of movies. The second one ended past midnight and Laurent saw how Damen was yawning. They washed up their mugs and popcorn bowl and Damen grabbed his hand and they walked into the bedroom. 

Damen’s apartment had his and hers sinks and they walked into the bathroom, Laurent with his toothbrush in hand. He smiled when he saw the shower curtain. “It looks perfect.”

“It does,” Damen agreed.

They glanced at each other and smiled as they brushed their teeth. Once they were done they walked back into the bedroom. Damen flipped the over head light off, which only left a small lamp on a bedside table.

“Do you have a preferred side?” Laurent asked shyly.

Damen seriously wished to kiss him all over. “Yeah, the whole bed,” he said and they laughed. Damen took Laurent’s hand. “Nervous?” He asked softly.

“A little,” Laurent said. 

“So am I,” Damen said. Laurent looked up at him. “But if any two people can do this, it’s us.”

Laurent’s heart fluttered. “You always say the most perfect things,” Laurent whispered back.

Damen led him to the bed and Laurent climbed in. Damen covered him with the blanket and comforter and then walked around and clicked the light off and got into bed himself.

They reached for each other and settled comfortably. Laurent closed his eyes. The bed smelled like Damen. He felt as if he was in a cocoon and he had never been more at peace or felt more safe. They fell sleep quite quickly.

* * *

Laurent stirred. He looked out the window. The morning was overcast and it was raining. Distant thunder rumbled and rain tapped the window. Laurent had his cheek on Damen’s chest. He stayed still for a while. He was feeling a lot, but what he was feeling the most at that moment was safe. Safety. Funny, really, Laurent actually smiled to himself. He knew, this man sleeping underneath him would never hurt him, would never take advantage of him and would never abuse him in anyway. 

His brain, in this state of complete happiness and peacefulness, began to wander elsewhere. He felt his heart thumped hard against his ribs. Thoughts of Damen really always ended up, sooner or later, in one spot.

Laurent ran his palm across the warm chest beneath him and Damen made a soft moaning sound in his throat as he turned towards Laurent and stretched, a sleepy, happy smile on his lips. Laurent looked up at him.

Laurent reached for the waist band of his pants. He slid his left index finger inside it and caressed it side to side. Damen quickly blinked and seemed to wake up in a matter of seconds. Laurent then caressed his abdomen and felt Damen wrap his arms around him tightly.

“What are you doing baby?” Damen’s voice was thick with sleep and arousal. Laurent heard it. He liked it.

“Touching you,” he answered softly.

His left hand slid around Damen’s waist, to the small of his back and down, into his sleep pants and over Damen’s backside. The skin was warm and smooth on top of firm muscle and Damen’s body flexed as he moaned. His erection was tenting his pants. Laurent squeezed Damen’s ass which made him moan again.

“Mmmm. What are you doing?” Damen asked again and this time their lips met. Laurent moaned into the kiss as he opened up his mouth for Damen, surrendering himself. All the kisses that followed were open mouthed and they seemed to not be able to get enough.

Laurent pushed Damen’s pants down and Damen quickly kicked them off. They were lost under the bed covers. Laurent pushed on Damen’s chest, he laid on his back. He looked up as he saw Laurent quickly push off his shorts, also loosing when under the covers. Laurent slid a leg over Damen, straddling him. Damen gasped as the hot silky skin of Laurent’s erection rubbed his own.

“Laurent,” Damen said and they locked gazes.

Laurent reached behind him and pulled his shirt off and threw it to the side. Damen slid his hands up Laurent’s thighs and Laurent reached and slid his right hand behind Damen’s head, pulling him forward and into a sitting position. “Damianos,” he whispered and their lips met again.

It felt like an explosion inside both of them. Damen’s hands were ceaseless as Laurent rocked his hips back and forth in smooth motions, Laurent moaned and closed his eyes. He tugged at the back on Damen’s head, tugging his hair, tilting his head back. Damen looked up at the vision that was Laurent. Eyes closed and lips parted, his fluid motions were intoxicating. Damen eyes traveled down and watched as his abdomen flexed and hips moved back and forth. Laurent was being very vocal and Damen loved it. He willed himself to be more quiet, he wanted to hear every sound Laurent made. Damen clenched his jaw so just gasps and soft grunts escaped him as he listened to the wonderful sounds escaping Laurent’s lips.

His eyes traveled back up Laurent’s beautiful body. Damen kissed the pale column of Laurent’s neck. He softly licked and kissed it slowly and tenderly. “You remember,” Laurent said leaning his head against Damen’s and then their lips met again. Their cocks were hard and heavy, leaking all over them.

“Baby,” Damen whispered as he kissed Laurent’s neck, slowly. “May I please you with my mouth?”

“Yes,” Laurent whispered. Damen grinned at this. Damen held Laurent firmly and gingerly set Laurent on his back. Damen pushed up on his knees. Laurent was sprawled on his back, golden hair splayed, his long, lean arms and legs graceful as always. Damen slid down, kissing his abdomen and he was surprised when Laurent’s bent his right leg and slid it over his shoulder. Damen looked up. 

Laurent’s eyes were dark and intense. His left arm was stretched over his head, grabbing onto the bed frame and the other was in Damen’s hair. Damen began by kissing his right inner thigh. The moments Damen had been here were few and far between. Now, Laurent seemed to be so eager to share his body with him. 

The gentle bites and kissed elicited gorgeous, sensual moans and groans from Laurent. They weren’t theatrical or over the top. They were simply full of desire and emotion. Once the right inner thigh had been sufficiently kissed and adored, Damen began on the left one. He was in heaven. He had never had such access to this beautiful body that he loved so much. Laurent’s back would arch beautifully and he would moan and groan. Damen would look up and check and make sure there were no signs of regret or uneasiness. None appeared. Laurent was a man freed it seemed, and in Damen’s eyes he had never looked more beautiful.

Damen had begun with a kiss to the right hip and worked his lips in and down.

“Ooh,” Laurent moaned, satisfied. He gasped a bit and Damen stopped and looked up. “Could you...” Laurent trailed off and his cheeks reddened. 

“Yes baby?” Damen asked.

Laurent grinned. “You could leave marks if you’d like.”

Damen’s heart thumped in his chest in a way that almost left him breathless. He had never even let his mind want this. Ever. Laurent’s pale skin had been such a huge turn on for Damen because he knew how easily it would show any marks made during lovemaking... and now...

Damen felt almost dizzy. He looked down at Laurent’s body. He went for the inner thigh. He licked a spot and kissed it and then began to mark it. Laurent’s moans were amazing. They turned Damen on so much. He pulled back and looked and was proud of the mark he left.

“Admiring your handiwork?” Laurent asked.

Damen looked up and saw him grinning. His face was flushed and pretty mouth pink. “Very much so,” Damen confessed.

“Do as many as you like,” Laurent said with a sexy half smile. Damen’s eyes widened. “But just where you alone can see them, ok?”

Damen nodded and grinned and leaned into his left hip. His lips trailed down where his thigh connected and he sucked right there. Laurent cried out and tugged Damen’s hair a bit. Damen looked up and their eyes locked. “Don’t stop,” Laurent panted. Damen kept going until a gorgeous dark purple mark formed. 

He then slid Laurent’s erection into his mouth. He sucked earnestly. Laurent groaned in pleasure, still not believing this was happening. All those nights he had laid awake silently begging Damen to wait for him, or to maybe one day give him the chance to just let him explain or to just let him show him how much he loved him and now... now...

“Damen! I’m -“

Laurent came and Damen swallowed his release. Laurent happily shuddered under Damen. He looked down on him, panting and lovingly grinned at him when he was done. Damen pushed up and kissed Laurent. Laurent laughed giddily under him.

“My turn,” Laurent said.

Damen stared at him. “What?”

“It’s my turn,” Laurent said with a sexy smile.

He pushed and turned Damen so he was now on his back. Laurent straddled Damen and kissed him deeply. “I want to suck your cock,” Laurent whispered. 

Damen stared at Laurent in amazement. “Ok,” he said softly. His heart was thumping hard and fast still. 

Laurent planted sweet kisses down Damen’s body. He looked down and couldn’t believe Laurent was about to do this. He had only done it that one time for his 18th birthday and back then he couldn’t even look, he had been made to push back against the shower wall and told not touch him. Today he had touched. He had touched everywhere. Not only touched, but Laurent had asked Damen to mark him. 

“Oh fuck!” Damen whispered when Laurent took him into his mouth. The sight was as heavenly as Damen could have imagined. Laurent’s golden head bobbed up and down as he sucked Damen. He felt Laurent’s tongue swirl around him. Damen tensed. It was too good and Laurent was all his fantasies in one perfect body and... “Oh! Fuck!”

Damen watched as Laurent swallowed every drop of his release. Damen stroked Laurent’s soft golden hair with adoration as Laurent wiped his chin and began to crawl up to him.

“Baby,” Damen said.“That was -“

“Adequate?” Laurent asked.

They both laughed as Laurent settled down on Damen. Damen hummed happily. “What a happy way to wake up,” he said lovingly.

Laurent chuckled and looked up at him. “You always look so handsome in the mornings,” Laurent said and kissed him gently.

“We should do more sleep overs then,” Damen answered and kissed Laurent. They held each other for a comfortable moment. Damen reached for the comforter and covered them up.

Laurent chuckled. “Mmm, I love your bed. It smells just like you,” Laurent whispered as he caressed Damen’s chest.

Damen smiled. He held Laurent and kissed him all over his face. Laurent giggled. Damen still felt as if he was in an orgasmic high after all that had happened. He thought back on what they had just done. Laurent was so different. “You were so into it,” Damen said. He caressed Laurent. “That’s... new.”

“Yeah,” Laurent said quietly. He pushed up and looked Damen in the eyes. “It’s part of what I worked on in therapy,” he began to explain. “Sex is supposed to be this enjoyable thing that you share with a person of your choosing.” Damen nodded. “When you’re abused, it becomes twisted in your head. Sex feels good but abuse doesn’t. So in my head I didn’t know how to let go of the shame. I felt as if I should never enjoy it. That it was wrong for me to want it and crave it.”

“I understand,” Damen said softly.

“Anyway,” Laurent said lowering his gaze. “I worked on letting that shame go. I know what happens between us is beautiful and I will enjoy it fully.” 

They locked gazes again and Damen felt such love for Laurent.

“That is so wonderful baby,” Damen said. “And I’m with you every step of the way.”

Laurent nodded and smiled and settled back on Damen. He kissed his neck. “I know. And so am I with you. I want to share it all with you.”

Damen grinned. He hadn’t felt this good... _ever_.


	39. XXXIX

With the way the day had started, if it had been up to Damen, he and Laurent would have stayed in bed all day, making love and fucking and making up for the last five years apart. But after a sweet moment together, they got up, pulled some clothes on and Laurent made them breakfast.

Damen liked how much more talkative Laurent was as well. He found himself nodding and listening lots and he loved it. He could listen to Laurent all day. Once breakfast had been eaten and the dishes washed, they showered together and dressed for the day.

“I need clothes for work,” Laurent had said in the shower. 

“Suits?” 

“Yeah,” Laurent said.

“Well, lets go buy you some,” Damen suggested.

They made their way out of the apartment and went to the mall. Damen sat and watched as Laurent was measured and tried things on.

“Which do you like more?” Laurent asked as he went between different shirts and ties and suits. 

Damen just shook his head. “I don’t know! Everything looks so good on you.”

Laurent grinned. “You’re no help!” 

“Laurent! You look amazing in everything!” Damen said chuckling.

They took all the clothing Laurent had bought and dropped it off at his home. He hung the garment bags in the closet and kicked off his shoes and sat down on the bed beside Damen. “Thank you for coming with me.”

“What are boyfriends for?” Damen asked without thinking twice and froze for a second then grinned when Laurent grinned back and grabbed his hand. 

“Indeed,” he said softly. 

“So next week you start at the hotels?” Damen asked. Laurent nodded. “Are you nervous?”

Laurent thought about it. “Yes and no,” he replied. “I feel prepared, yet, the moment I take over they’re mine and I really hope I don’t fuck up!” 

Damen pulled Laurent close. “No way you will fuck up. You’re incredibly smart and work incredibly well under pressure. You also care and are passionate about the business. You take its success very personally. So, if you ask me there is no one better for those hotels than you.”

Laurent looked up and beamed at Damen. “Thank you so much for saying that. That makes me feel wonderful!”

Damen felt proud of himself. “You’re so very welcome. But I only speak the truth,” he whispered.

* * *

Since they were already there, they decided to stay there for dinner and Laurent took Damen to the kitchen so there was no need to set up the dining room. They ate and chatted with some staff and still, at moments, Damen felt he wanted to pinch himself at the absolute change in Laurent.

Once dinner was over, Damen thanked the cooks and hugged Mrs. Paschal and Laurent and Damen made their way back to Damen’s apartment. They walked into the bedroom and changed and he caught sight of how Laurent would look over his body. Damen pulled on his sleep pants with nothing underneath.

“Hot chocolate?” Damen asked.

“Yes, please,” Laurent said and he reached for Damen’s hand. They walked down the small hallway, through living him and into the small kitchen. Damen warmed up a cup of milk for Laurent first and placed it on the kitchen counter for him. He then put a mug of milk in the microwave for himself. 

He turned and watched as Laurent scooped the chocolate powder into his cup and began to stir it. Damen looked at his lean legs and the beautiful line of his neck and back, he had his hair up in a messy bun. Damen took a couple of steps forward and he came to stand behind Laurent. He placed his right hand on Laurent’s waist and kissed the nape of his neck, burying his nose in the silky, golden hair. Laurent giggled and Damen felt as his hand laced fingers with the one he had on Laurent’s waist. They stood like this a short moment and then the microwave beeped. Damen sighed. It felt amazing knowing he could touch Laurent in an intimate way now anytime he wished.

* * *

They ended up watching Jeopardy and keeping score. Laurent won, but just barely. Damen loved being challenged intellectually and he had always admired Laurent’s intelligence.

Finally, back in the bedroom they settled in bed. Damen took Laurent’s hand and kissed each one of his fingertips. He was holding him close.

“You’re so sweet and loving,” Laurent said softly.

“I love being sweet and loving. I love being romantic and caring. I love touching and caressing, the list goes on.” 

“I know,” Laurent beamed up at him. “You’re like a teddy bear. You make me feel all warm inside.” He reached up and traced Damen’s lips. “I know we have been physical before,” Laurent whispered. “But I want to... rediscover it all with you.” 

“Like this morning,” Damen whispered. Laurent nodded innocently. Damen blinked slowly. Another incredible moment. It seemed life would be full of them for a while. “We can do that. At your pace.”

“That’s what you said last time. At my own pace.”

“Yeah because it’s true,” Damen explained. “I want you to feel safe. I know as you’re ready, we’ll do more.” 

“But what about your needs, Damianos?” Laurent asked softly.

There was something in the way Laurent asked this question and said these words that made Damen’s skin fill with goosebumps. As a young man it had been easy to hide his desire since Laurent’s attitude was so polarizing in bed. But now, with the way Laurent had been this morning and the way he had just asked that question... it was hard for Damen to hide how he was feeling.

“Oh,” he answered, closing his eyes and swallowing. “I can wait.”

“But you’d rather not?” Laurent asked. 

Damen took a deep breath in and tried to calm himself. “I am more than happy and willing to wait for you, my love.”

Laurent pulled him on top, parting his legs for him. He pulled him in for a kiss. Damen felt his body push down on Laurent. It was involuntary. It felt amazing. He felt Laurent’s lips on his neck. He became aware of Laurent pushing his pants down. He just let him do it. His mind was fuzzy and he truly couldn’t think straight. Laurent then pushed his own shorts down, Damen lifted his body to give Laurent space. Laurent pulled his shirt up to his chest and then pulled Damen down onto him again.

“Laurent,” Damen groaned. His eyes were half closed. He was hot all over. “I can’t control myself,” he said quickly while he still felt he could make coherent sentences.

“I just want to give you pleasure,” Laurent whispered.

Damen grinned into Laurent’s neck. “Sweetheart, if you’re not ready then let’s... not...” but his words were lost in a groan as he felt Laurent turn on his stomach and push his hips back against him. Damen leaned his forehead down on the back of Laurent’s head. The smell of his hair engulfed him.

Damen thrust his hips forward, and was surprised to feel a tightening around it. He looked down and Laurent had pressed his thighs together, holding Damen’s erection tight between them. Without a second thought, Damen wrapped his left arm around Laurent’s waist, kissing the back of his neck and began to thrust. It felt amazing. They had never done anything like this. 

Laurent groaned as Damen slid his hand down Laurent’s smooth stomach and grasped his hard on. Laurent felt as if his body was completely covered by Damen’s and it felt wonderful. Damen began to thrust, holding nothing back and Laurent was so turned on by the force behind Damen’s movements, the sounds he made and the way to took completely control of Laurent’s body. Laurent kept his thighs firmly together as he began to thrust into Damen’s hand in return.

Their movements were hot and hurried and they both came quite quickly. The landed on the bed in a panting and sweaty mess. After a moment, Damen rolled off and landed on his back, panting beside Laurent. Laurent remained on his stomach, panting. Damen turned to look at Laurent, his cheeks flushed and hair even more of a mess. Laurent opened his eyes. They began to chuckle softly and then seeing the other chuckling began laughing harder and harder and harder.

They pulled together and kissed as they kept laughing, but softer and more calmly.

“We’re like two fucking horny teenagers,” Damen said and the comparison made him feel light and bubbly.

“I know,” Laurent said, propping up on his right elbow and caressing Damen’s chest with his left hand. “In my defense though, I was never able to just be a stupid, horny teenager so I’m making up for lost time!” 

Damen grinned and pulled Laurent in for a kiss. He then kept peppering Laurent’s cheek and down his neck with sweet kisses. Laurent’s admission had been deep and heartbreaking given the reason he wasn’t able to just be a teenager but Damen wasn’t going to let it ruin the happiness they were feeling now. The past was the past.

Damen laid his head back on the pillow and looked up at Laurent, face flushed and happy. He recognized that look now, that look of joy. He had it so much more now. He had seen it more in these last few days than in the whole year he had spent with Laurent five years ago.

“Ugh, I go back to work tomorrow,” Damen said with a sigh. Laurent leaned on him and Damen held him. “I have to get up early but you’re welcomed to stay. I have an extra key I can leave in on my dresser. You can keep it.”

Laurent grinned. “Giving me a key to your place already Damianos?”

“Yes, Laurent, is that a problem?” Damen asked in a jokingly upset tone.

Laurent laughed. “No. No problem at all.” He sighed. “Should we just shower a quickly?”

“Yes,” Damen said. He slid off the bed quickly and grabbed Laurent’s leg. He pulled him forward. 

“Damen!” Laurent cried out laughing.

Damen laughed and tickled him and then picked him up and threw Laurent over his shoulder. 

“Put me down you brute!” He cried out laughing loudly. 

“Hush, your highness! I’m carrying you to the bathroom!”

Laurent couldn’t stop laughing. Once in the bathroom Laurent threw his shirt on the floor and they showered. Laurent made sure to keep his hair dry and he ran the loofah over Damen’s muscular body, the white suds making his skin looked more tanned. Laurent let his hands roam freely loving the feel of Damen’s muscular body. Damen then washed Laurent, gently, tickling him and kissing his neck.

Once done they dried and quickly made their way back to bed and cuddled close. They were still undressed. They felt calm and peaceful. Laurent was amazed at how comfortable he felt with Damen, naked and just laying comfortably beside each other. 

Damen yawned and Laurent cuddled closer. “Mmm, you’re so warm,” Laurent said softly.

“Good,” Damen said sleepily. He pulled Laurent’s hair loose and softly caressed his long, soft golden hair. They were drifting off to sleep. “I love you,” Damen whispered.

“I love you too, Damen,” Laurent whispered back.

Damen’s eyes were heavy and closing and he was drifting off. But in a moment of clearity he realized he had the love of his life in his arms, they were together and in love and they were happy. So happy. He had everything he had ever wished for.


	40. XL

Laurent was wrapped up in the warm cocoon that was Damen and his bed. It all smelled liked him. The smell brought peace to Laurent. There was a stirring and Laurent briefly opened his eyes as Damen got out of bed. He heard the shower start and he drifted off to sleep again. 

“Baby.”

Laurent rubbed his eyes. “Hmm?”

Damen’s face was close to his. He kissed Laurent’s nose. “I’m off to work. My extra key is on the dresser in case you need to step out. I usually get home around 4:30.”

“I’ll be here,” said Laurent sleepy but smiling. “I’ll cook dinner.”

“Ok, baby,” Damen said and kissed him on the lips. “See you later ok? I love you.”

“I love you, have a good day at work.” Laurent closed his eyes and soon enough, sleep found him again. 

* * *

Laurent awoke. It took him a moment to realize his phone was ringing. He reached for it. It could only be one of three people. 

“Hello,” he said groggily. 

“Laurent?” It was Auguste. 

Laurent stretched and a soft groan escaped his throat. “Yeah?”

“Ah... it’s almost eleven. I’m at you’re home and you’re not here and you sound like you’re just waking up...”

“Yeah,” Laurent said grinning. 

“Where you at little brother?”

“At Damen’s,” Laurent said, big grin still on his face. 

“Wow!” Auguste chuckled. “That was fast.”

“Oh shut up,” he said lightheartedly. “I’m sure you’re calling me for a reason?”

“Yes, two actually. One, Ada wants you over for dinner tonight. Bring Damen! She’ll love to see him. And two, Jord texted me to call him at my earliest convenience -“

Laurent sat up. “Hotel business?” 

“I would assume so,” Auguste replied. “I know you’re off another six days but -“

“No! No, that’s totally cool Auguste. I got it. I want to. Can you send me all his contact info? All of the numbers please that I need that you have.”

“Sure thing,” Auguste said and Laurent could hear the smile in his voice. 

Laurent got up and dressed. He had a bowl of oatmeal and fruit with a cup of coffee and had then called Jord. He was sitting on the couch and had a notepad and pen on his lap just in case. 

“This is Jord.”

“Jord! Hey! It’s Laurent.”

“Laurent! What a pleasant surprise! I texted Auguste to call me, I knew you weren’t coming on duty until Monday.”

“Oh, no it’s totally ok. Save my number. But what’s up? What can I help you with?”

Jord let out an annoyed sigh. “It’s regarding Nicaise.”

Nicaise. Laurent felt a chill go through his stomach. “Nicaise?”

“Yes, I believe you know him. His father is managing -“

“Yes. The hotel in New York.” The one who was paid to keep his silence and took the money, Laurent told himself. 

“Yes. Well, I found an email from him this morning requesting a meeting with Auguste. He said he wanted to meet at the hotel in town because it’s concerning hotel business.”

Laurent felt a hint of nervousness. What was this about? What could Nicaise want? He remembered the last time they spoke... Laurent let out a breath. “Well, have someone contact him back. Tell him to come to the hotel Thursday at 11 am.”

“Yes, sir,” Jord said and Laurent thought he sounded pleased with Laurent. “I will save your number and I will text you if anything else comes up, which I hope it doesn’t. I wish you some wonderful days off.”

“Thank you Jord,” Laurent said with a smile. “Have a lovely rest of your day.”

With that Laurent hung up. He raised his right leg up and rested his chin on it. What could Nicaise want?

* * *

Laurent knew he had to try to not worry as it didn’t do any good. He had taken the notepad and written out his feelings. He had always kept a journal and in therapy he had learned to write down his train of thought to help him figure his feelings out. He had also reminded himself himself, again, that worrying changed nothing. He could not do anything until Nicaise and he spoke. 

He texted Damen and asked him to call him when he had a chance and then took off for the grocery store. He knew Damen needed coffee and a few other staples and plus he figured they should at least take wine or some desert to Ada’s tonight. He had just pulled into a parking spot at the grocery store when Damen called. 

“Hey, baby,” he said.

“Hi, handsome,” Laurent responded. He loved being so affectionate. “Auguste called and said Ada wants us over for dinner. What do you say?”

“Wow! Yeah! I haven’t seen her since... you know.”

“I know,” Laurent said. “It’ll be nice to catch up.”

“Yeah!”

“I’m at the grocery store. I’m getting you coffee and a few other things. Need anything?”

“Toilet paper and can you get more popcorn? Are you at the store beside the European bakery?”

Laurent looked around. “Yes.”

“Can you get some almond croissants? They’re so, so good.”

“Yes, baby,” Laurent said smiling as he got out and this took his mind off things for a while. He took his time at the grocery story and then went to the bakery. There, apart from getting Damen his croissants, he went with a lovely fruit tart to take to dinner that night. 

Once home, Laurent looked at the clock and was happy to see it was almost 4 pm. He wouldn’t be alone with his thoughts much longer. He noticed Damen had a Bluetooth speaker above his fireplace mantel and after hooking it up to his phone, he laid on the couch and sang along with some music as he looked through some magazines he had bought. He was so into this, and the music so loud, he didn’t even hear Damen come in and jumped when he approached the couch. 

“Oh!” Laurent said and chuckled. 

Damen quickly walked to the mantle and turned the speaker off. Laurent had been too sleepy to take a proper look at him in the morning, but was seeing him now. He loved how Damen looked in slacks. They hugged his legs and ass very nicely indeed. 

“Laurent,” Damen said crouching down in front of him. “I love you with all my heart but I’ll be a little pissed if I get complaints for loud music. I could hear it all clearly out in the hallway.”

Lauren grinned. He could tell Damen wasn’t truly angry. “My apologies,” he said. Damen chuckled and kissed him. Laurent watched him as he set down his messenger bag and loosened up his tie. He then untucked and unbuttoned his shirt. He suddenly caught Laurent staring. 

“What?” He asked laughing.

Laurent shook his head and looked away, blushing. Damen loves this of course. “You’re just so good looking.”

“Says the most beautiful man on earth,” Damen replied rolling his eyes. 

Laurent laughed. All traces of worry evaporated from his mind. 

* * *

Laurent was in a loose white tee shirt and fit black jeans. He had a loose black blazer on top. He watched as Damen got dressed. He slid on some dark jeans and a white knit sweater. The white looked wonderful against his tanned skin. He smiled approvingly. Damen grinned back and wrapped him up in his arms and kissed him. He could really get used to this. 

Laurent gathered the fruit tart and they ended up stopping for a bottle of wine on the way to Auguste’s home. Auguste and Ada hadn’t moved too far away. They drove down the winding driveway and through the gates. 

“You De Vere men really like to show off your wealth huh?” Damen asked. 

For a few seconds Laurent wasn’t sure exactly what Damen meant. “Is that a bad thing?” Laurent asked. They parked and got out of the car. 

“No,” Damen said coming around and opening the passenger door for Laurent. He kissed him on the forehead and they got the wine and fruit tart out of the backseat. 

“This is Ada’s home, actually,” Laurent told him. 

“Ok,” Damen said and put his arm around Laurent. “I didn’t mean it as anything negative. It’s just I forget how rich you guys are sometimes.”

“That’s a good thing,” Laurent said. 

They walked up the steps of the large home and Damen rung the bell. There was yapping of several dogs and then the door swung open and Ada let out a scream. 

Damen and Laurent laughed as she flung and arm around each of their necks and pulled them close. 

“Oh look at you both! Grown men!” She said pulling back. “Wow, you two make quite a striking couple,” she said grinning. They all stepped inside. There were two Shih Tzus yapping around their feet. Their coats were long and they each had bows on top of their heads. 

“Hey!” Auguste walked into the entrance hallway. He and Laurent hugged. “Good to see you Damen!” He said cheerfully. He embraced him. 

“Good to see you too,” Damen said. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

Laurent looked between them in surprise. “Sure, come on, my study is this way,” Auguste said and he and Damen walked off. 

“Oh! What’s that?” Ada asked Laurent. 

“Oh we brought desert and wine,” Laurent said and Ada guided him through the living room and into the kitchen. There was a chef in the kitchen. Ada began to chat and Laurent nodded and smiled and said yes and no accordingly but he kept glancing at the doorway waiting for his brother and Damen to walk in.

They finally did a short while later. Auguste has his hand on Damen’s shoulder, almost in a fatherly way and they were speaking softly. They smiled at one another and then Damen came and slid an arm around Laurent’s waist from behind. Laurent caressed his forearm and they all stood around the kitchen island sipping wine and catching up. 

* * *

Dinner had been nice. Ada was sweet and welcoming and the food had been delicious. They didn’t stay late though as Damen had to work the following day. Laurent was curious about what Damen wanted to talk to Auguste about. He wanted to know. He wished Damen had just told him but he hadn’t and now they were pulling into the apartment. Damen came around and shut Laurent’s door and they held hands as they walked to Damen’s apartment. 

Once inside Laurent walked to the couch and began to take off his boots. He felt tired. They went into the bedroom after brushing their teeth and began to get ready for bed. 

“Do we need clothes?” Damen asked. 

“No,” Laurent said softly as he pulled off his clothing. Damen grinned and walked over and softly kissed his neck. Laurent sighed into him. He figured if he wanted a healthy relationship with Damen he had to be open and honest. “Damianos?”

“Yes?” Damen asked pulling back. 

“What did you want to talk to Auguste about?”

“Oh,” Damen said and blushed slightly. He sat at the edge of the bed and held on to Laurent’s hand. “The first couple of years back after Paris were not the easiest for me,” Damen began. Laurent sat beside him on the bed. “I... I was depressed to be honest and Nikandros and Erasmus and Auguste were doing all the could to help. 

“Oh,” Laurent whispered. He began to feel sad.

“So it was about a year and a half after you were gone... the day of your uncle’s sentencing actually,” Damen continued. “Auguste was there as was I and as I was leaving I saw him and asked him about you, because I  always  asked about you and he again said he didn’t know and I...” Damen shrugged. “I went off on him. It was horrible I said a lot of mean shit...” he trailed off. 

“I’m sorry,” Laurent said. 

Damen shook his head. He looked away. “That was the last time we had spoken. Not because he quit trying, no. I was so hurt and just couldn’t get over the heartache. I shut him out and well I had to apologize for that.”

Damen finally met Laurent’s eyes. Laurent remembered Nikandros and how he had told Laurent to ask Damen how it had been. Here was a small glimpse. 

“I’m so sorry,” Laurent said. “Damen, I... I...” Laurent was at a loss for words. He was very overwhelmed by the guilt he was feeling. Yet, he needed time. He had needed to get a grip on his mental state and turn his life around. Yet, it seemed it had come at a great cost to the people he care about most. 

“No, don’t be,” Damen said softly. “Laurent, it wasn’t just the break up and the abruptness of it, although that did add to the stress,” Damen confessed. “But it was all of it. The reasoning behind it,” he continued. They looked into each other’s eyes. Laurent’s heart was thumping hard against his rib cage. “I wished to make it all better for you and to just help you with your pain and I couldn’t get to you and I was, still am, so in love with you.”

“Huh,” Laurent said as he breathed out a heavy breath. Damen squeezed his hand. “I really want to hear about what you had to deal in the time I was gone,” Laurent whispered. 

Damen sighed and shook his head. “Why?!” He asked looking straight into Laurent’s eyes. “It’s all fucking sad and pointless! It’s over now! It seems so counterproductive!”

Laurent chose his words carefully. He didn’t just want to hear what Damen went through just so he could know, he wanted to hear it so Damen would get it out of his system. Damen might not realize it, but Laurent knew it was something that had to be aired so they could truly move on. “Rehashing the painful past is counterproductive, my love?” Laurent asked softly. 

Damen’s eyes widened. “No!” Damen said, realizing what he had said. “Baby that’s.. it’s not -“

“I know,” Laurent said leaning in and kissing Damen. He slid off the bed and continued undressing. Damen was already down to his boxers. He undid his jeans and pushed them down and pulled his socks off. Laurent walked to Damen and wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight. Damen felt so warm. “I’m tired,” he whispered. “Let’s go to sleep.”

“Yes, my love,” Damen whispered. 

They climbed into bed and Damen turned the light off and they cuddled close, settling comfortably. Damen caressed Laurent’s back and Laurent gently stroked Damen’s chest. Laurent’s mind quieted and he was slowly drifting off to sleep.

“You can tell me anything,” Laurent said in a sleepy voice. 

Damen smiled. “I know I can. Thank you,” he replied. 

“You’re welcome,” Laurent said. Damen loved how sleepy he sounded. “Damen, I love you.”

Damen’s chest filled with warmth. “I love you too, Laurent.”


	41. XLI

Wednesday night, Laurent had finally gotten to cook Damen dinner like he had wanted to. Damen had talked about his day and he told Laurent about his students. Laurent listened to every word and took in everything Damen was telling him. 

“You can come to the school you know,” Damen had said, he felt his cheeks warm. “I mean we only have like two more weeks left of school,” he chuckled. “But when the school year starts again, you can come and have lunch with me whenever you want.”

Laurent smiled at the idea. “I would love that. I will definitely do that.” Damen grinned at him. “Oh, so tomorrow I’m going to the hotel in town,” Laurent said. 

Damen furrowed his brow. “Really? Why?”

“The son of the manager from the hotel in New York wishes to speak to me,” Laurent said. 

“Why?” Damen asked. 

“I’ll find out tomorrow,” Laurent said with a shrug. Damen didn’t press the matter further. 

They had washed their plates and Damen had book reports to grade so Laurent sat with him on the couch and read as Damen did this marking. Damen would glance every once in a while at Laurent’s long legs. Laurent would point and flex his foot and then bend it back. He seemed to do this without thinking. His lips would also sometimes move as he read. Damen found himself gazing at his lips a lot. 

Finally, Damen finished and he got up and stretched and they made their way to the bedroom. They crawled into bed. Damen loved the way Laurent felt in his arms. He closed his eyes and felt so at peace. He knew he loved Laurent, but now, even he was surprised at how deeply in love he was and it scared him to realize that he could fall even more deeply in love. He sighed and held Laurent tightly. 

* * *

Thursday morning, after kissing Damen goodbye, Laurent stayed up and made himself coffee. He then wondered what to wear. Laurent had decided on a suit jacket with matching slacks but he didn’t put on a tie. He left his hair loose. He made it to the hotel at 10:30 and had taken the staff elevator to the offices. He had been greeted warmly by Jord. Jord was a stout, middled aged man and he embraced Laurent and slapped his back in a fatherly fashion. 

“Good to see you, Laurent,” he said. The emotion in his voice audible. “Come on,” he said and showed Laurent to his office. Laurent couldn’t help but smile when he saw his name on a plaque on the door. He and Jord chatted a while and Laurent felt excited about finally being here. “I’m here beside you all the way,” Jord told him. 

“Thank you so much,” Laurent said. 

“Let me know if you need anything,” Jord said and left Laurent’s office. Laurent sighed and looked out the windows. It had a wonderful view. He remembered coming here as a child. He remembered hiding under the huge desk and playing quietly while his father had meetings. He wanted to make him proud. 

He heard a knock at the door. “Yes?!” Laurent called out. 

A young woman came in. “Sir, a young man, he won’t give me his name, said you were expecting him?”

“Yes. Let him in please.”

She nodded and walked out. Laurent decided to walk to his desk and sit down. He looked at the computer on the side. There came a quick knock and Laurent looked up and saw Nicaise walk in. He was taller than last time they had seen each other, but about half a head shorter than Laurent. 

Gone was the slight roundness of his cheeks. His jaw and high cheek bones were angular. This hair was dark curls on top with a fade out on the back of the head. He was beautiful, his mouth slightly pouty and full under a straight nose. His eyes a different shade of blue than Laurent’s, looked surprised under perfect dark eyebrows. 

“Nicaise,” Laurent said standing up. 

“Well, look who’s back. I wasn’t expecting  this  young Mr. De Vere.” He walked forward and for a moment Laurent thought of shaking his hand but Nicaise pulled him into a hug. Laurent patted his back.

“How are you?” Laurent asked. 

Nicaise simply shrugged. “When did you get back?” He asked ignoring Laurent’s question. 

“Last week,” Laurent answered. 

“Are you staying for good?” Nicaise asked as he took a seat. Laurent walked around and sat behind the desk again. 

“I am. I’ll be running the hotels now.”

“Better you than your delinquent uncle. You won’t be raping any little boys.”

Laurent let out a breath. “No, I will not.” He looked Nicaise over. He had his legs crossed in dark jeans, white tee shirt and a dark blazer. He had a navy blue and red scarf fashionably wrapped around his neck. He had one dangling earring. “And what do I owe this pleasure to?” Laurent asked, figured they may as well get on with it. 

Nicaise nodded. “I want you to fire my father,” he said nonchalantly.

“Fire your father?”

“Yes. Fire him.”

Laurent took a deep breath in and out. He knew the history of Nicaise and his father’s relationship so he wasn’t surprised at his request and if they had had any more issues that was between them. “Nicaise, someone can’t just be fired without reason. That would be wrongful termination and that would mean a lawsuit against De Vere Hotels.”

“He’s doing a shitty job. He’s a fucking drunk. He can’t be managing the hotel well.”

“I will make sure to pay attention to how he’s managing the hotel, just like all hotels are being managed, and if he’s not fulfilling his duties, he will be reprimanded and if it leads up to termination then he will be terminated.”

Nicaise’s nodded and looked past Laurent and out the window, face void of emotion. Laurent recognized the expression. He use to have it all the time himself as a teenager. Laurent tapped his fingertips on his desk. Laurent didn’t necessarily  want  to get involved but...

“How are you?” Laurent asked him again. 

Nicaise’s eyes wandered back to Laurent. “Fine. You?”

“Good,” Laurent said. He figured he wouldn’t ask anything else. “Well if there’s -“

“Actually I’m not fine. I still struggle. A lot. Most days are better than others but I’m always miserable. There are days I hate the world and wish for it and everyone in it to burn to the ground. Then there’s days I hate myself for being hateful and as I wallow in my fucking never ending pity I ask myself what did I do to deserve this shit?”

Laurent locked gazes with Nicaise.

“And then I realize I did nothing to deserve this shit. It was all done to me by your uncle who’s now rotting in jail and so what’s the point of hating him and then I remind myself my father has a job simply because I was raped.”

Laurent nodded slowly. “When we spoke you told me you had seen a therapist?”

“I did for a while. Then stopped.”

“Are you talking to anyone now?”

“Therapy isn’t for everyone.” Laurent nodded again. “Maybe I’ll never be better,” Nicaise said. 

“Well what are you up to? Are you in school?”

“No,” Nicaise said. “I’m just wasting my father’s money.”

“Well if I fire him how will you survive?”

“I’ll sell the house and figure something out.”

“What do you want to do?” Laurent asked. 

Nicaise sighed. “I’m in this band,” he answered offhandedly. 

“Oh! So you are doing something,” Laurent said with a smile. 

Nicaise smiled as well in spite of himself. “I guess.” He sighed. “I... I can’t get over the anger of my father betraying me,” he confessed. 

Laurent nodded. “Well, I don’t pretend to know what you’re feeling, but, hanging on to that anger is hurting no one but you.”

“Yeah, I know, I know,” Nicaise said, waving a hand dismissively. “I also paint,” he told Laurent. 

“Oh! Nice!”

“Wanna see some of my work?” Nicaise asked. 

“Yes!” Laurent answered nodding. 

Nicaise took out his phone asked for Laurent’s number, which he gave. He sent Laurent a link to his website. “Buy some. You’re rich enough to afford it.”

Laurent chuckled. He looked over the site on his phone. It was very nicely designed. He looked over some of Nicaise’s work. “Wow, you’re really good,” he said furrowing his brow. 

“Why do you look so surprised?” Nicaise asked laughing. 

Laurent looked up. “Oh! I’m sorry, no, just some on here are truly beautiful.” 

Nicaise smiled. “Well thank you.” He stood up. “Well, sorry to bother you,” he said with a half smile. “I thought it would be Auguste I would be speaking to and I thought maybe I could guilt trip him into at least demoting him.”

Laurent stood up and smiled as well. “Sorry to disappoint then,” Laurent said with a shrug as he rounded his desk. They made their way to the office door. 

“No. No I’m glad I saw you,” Nicaise said. “You look good.”

“So do you,” Laurent answered. “I’ll look at the art.” 

“Thanks,” Nicaise said. “Well, maybe we can go out for a beer or something some time. Catch up.”

“Yeah,” Laurent said. “That would be good.”

“Ok, good seeing you, Laurent,” Nicaise said. 

“Good seeing you too, Nicaise,” Laurent answered. Nicaise gave him another half smile and a wink and then walked out his office door. 

* * *

It wasn’t that late when Nicaise left and so Laurent decided to surprise Damen for lunch. He passed by a cafe he liked and got something and then drove to the middle school. Once in the parking lot, he texted Damen. He normally called him during his lunch anyway, so he knew he would see his text message right away. 

He hadn’t even been there five minutes when his phone rang. 

“Hello?” Laurent answered with a smile. 

“Hey! You’re here!”

“Yeah! I brought you lunch.”

“Ok, I’m walking out!” 

Laurent grinned and looked around until he saw Damen walk to his car. He exited his car and got the food out of the backseat. Damen and he met and kissed lightly on the lips. 

“Come on! I want to show you my classroom!” Laurent grinned at Damen’s obvious excitement. They held hands as they walked to the school. They walked in and Damen waved at the secretary, he walked over and introduced them. 

“This is my boyfriend, Laurent, so if you ever see him come by, it’s for me,” Damen said proudly. 

Laurent grinned at the secretary. “Nice to meet you,” he said. 

“Nice to meet you!” She replied with wide eyes and looking like she was suppressing a giggle. 

They walked down the hall and up a flight of stairs and then they turned left and Damen led him to the first door. Laurent looked around grinning. He looked at the art and posters on the wall. Damen, it seemed, had been halfway through writing out a math lesson on the chalk board. Laurent looked at Damen who was positively beaming. 

“This is wonderful,” Laurent said. “ _You’re_ wonderful.” Laurent put the food down on the desk and walked to Damen, grabbing his face and kissing him. “So wonderful. I’m so proud of this. Of  _you_ .”

Damen swallowed and nodded. “Thank you,” he said. 

* * *

Lunch had been... wonderful. They had eaten in a bit of a rush because Damen had only had about 20 more minutes. Laurent was glad he went with sandwiches and salad and he thought next time he came back he would make sure to do food like that, nothing too messy. They had kissed and said good bye and Laurent had made his way back to his car. 

Once inside his car, he grabbed his phone and a business card out of his wallet and dialed the number on it. 

“Dr. Shaw’s office, this is Stephanie speaking.”

“Stephanie, hi. My name is Laurent De Vere and my doctor in France, Dr. Cormier, gave me Dr. Shaw’s number. I’ve moved and so needed a new doctor.”

“Oh, wonderful. Actually, we did receive your file last week.”

“Oh, great. I was wondering if I could make an appointment to speak to Dr. Shaw?”

“Yeah, of course. When did you want to come in?”

“I know it’s very short notice but could I come in tomorrow morning?”

“You are in luck because I actually just had a cancellation. Tomorrow at 10:15?”

“That’s perfect. Thank you, Stephanie.”

“You’re welcome, Mr. De Vere. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow,” Laurent said. He hung up his phone and sighed. He sat in his car taking deep breaths for a moment. He couldn’t stop grinning. He had never been happier. 


	42. XLII

Laurent looked around the office. He was on a leather love seat. There was a tall bookcase, he glanced over the books. There was a soft knock and Laurent rose. Dr. Shaw walked in. 

She looked about 40, shoulder length auburn hair and brown eyes. She had a heart shaped face. 

“Hi, how are you?” She asked and shook Laurent’s hand. Her touch was soft. 

“Good thank you, nice to meet you,” Laurent said and liked her right away.

“Nice to meet you too,” she said with soft smile that reached her eyes. She felt very motherly. She settled on a leather arm chair and Laurent sat back on the love seat. He crossed his legs and clasped his hands on his lap. “So I read over your file and the notes Dr. Cormier wrote,” she began. 

“If you don’t mind me asking, how do you know Dr. Cormier?”

“Oh we met at a convention about eight years ago,” Dr. Shaw said smiling. “She’s a wonderful person.”

“Agreed!” Laurent said. They both shared a laugh. “Please, continue.”

Dr. Shaw nodded. “So it seems you have made wonderful strides and we’re here just to make sure everything stays that way.” Laurent nodded. “So how have you been settling in?”

“Well,” Laurent said. “I actually am surprised at how well it’s been to the point that I’m beginning to get nervous about it.”

“How so?”

“My ex boyfriend, Damen, had a girlfriend. He broke up with her and now we’re back together. So, not my ex anymore.”

Dr. Shaw began to take notes. “Do you feel bad about that?”

“No!” Laurent said with a scoff. “No I’m so happy about it! It was like a fantasy of mine that I would come back and Damen would welcome me back with open arms and it literally almost happened that way. We’ve been inseparable since Saturday.”

Dr. Shaw nodded. “Is it too much too soon?”

Laurent shook his head. “No, I don’t think so.”

“Don’t think so?”

“No I don’t think so. It’s a lot,” Laurent confessed. “We have come together and it’s amazing.” Laurent couldn’t help but grin. “He makes me feel so safe and loved and it used to scare me but now it’s addicting. No one makes me feel like he does. I want to keep it forever.”

Dr. Shaw smiled. “Have you spoken to Damen about the years in France?”

“Yes, to an extent,” Laurent said. “As time goes by I want to tell him more and more and I wish he too would speak to me about the years we were apart but it’s hard for him. I don’t want him to repress it though, but it’ll be hard to get him to open up.”

Dr. Shaw looked up. “We all need time.”

“Yes, but I’m afraid he won’t ever want to revisit it. It’s painful and he feels what’s the point since we’re back together but I.. I need to hear it as much as he needs to say it.”

Dr. Shaw nodded. “And you think you’ll be ok hearing it? It won’t trigger anything?”

Laurent thought about this. “I don’t think so,” Laurent said. “If it does, you’ll be hearing about it.”

“Ok, we can text,” Dr. Shaw said. “If it’s an emergency you can text me and I’ll call you,” she said and handed Laurent a business card. 

“Thank you,” Laurent said. “So two things brought me here today.”

“Ok?” Dr. Shaw looked up.

“First,” Laurent said. “I have come into contact with someone I wasn’t expecting to. He’s another victim of my uncle’s. And I’m not sure how he’s truly doing. He’s getting by. But I have a feeling he’ll contact me whenever he’s having a bad day.”

Dr. Shaw furrowed her brow. “Is he in your social circle?”

“No, he has my number though. His father works at one of my hotels. He... his father knew and took money from my uncle to keep quiet.”

Dr. Shaw nodded. “I see, so you’ve spoken to him?”

“Yes, he wanted me to fire his father. I can’t, no matter how much I wish to and I will make sure I keep any personal feelings at bay. If the man is doing his job, I will not fire him.”

Dr. Shaw nodded. “You’re concerned for the young man though?”

“I am. I like him, once upon a time we were friends. I don’t know what we are now. He doesn’t know my uncle raped me though. I don’t think I want to tell him.”

“Ok,” she said. “Of course I understand your concern. But know, you’re not solely responsible for his well being, not if it means undoing process you have done. Encourage him to talk to someone else apart from you.”

Laurent nodded but stayed quiet.

“Or, do you want him to talk to you?”

“I don’t know,” Laurent said. “I don’t know yet.”

“Ok, please tread carefully here, you need to take care of yourself. Again, you’re not responsible for him just because your uncle abused him. You were abused as well and you may not be equipped to deal with his emotions. Think of Damen, you knew deep down he wouldn’t be able to handle it all, so take that care you had for Damen and use on yourself regarding this young man. Please, Laurent.” 

Laurent again nodded. He felt he didn’t want to discuss Nicaise any longer. “And second,” he said, to show Dr. Shaw he was done with the previous topic. “I feel I’m ready to have sex with Damen.”

Dr. Shaw nodded and flipped through some notes. “Ok so you and Dr. Cormier had talked about you wanting to deal with the bedroom at home your uncle had abused you in. You said you wanted to come to terms with the memories of the room before having sex with Damen.”

“Yeah, I don’t now... I just want to have sex with Damen,” Laurent confessed.

“Well thank you for your honesty and the fact that you haven’t yet truly shows how dedicated you are to do what you feel is best for you emotionally and for the health of your relationship with Damen,” Dr. Shaw said with a smile. Laurent smiled back, he truly liked her. 

“Thank you,” he said feeling proud of himself. 

“I have an idea,” Dr. Shaw said tentatively. 

“Ok?”

“Why don’t you take Damen into the bedroom at home with you?”

Laurent sat, surprised. He took a moment to think about it. “That... that might be a good idea,” he said. 

“It’ll will be hard,” Dr. Shaw reminded Laurent. 

“Oh I know,” Laurent said rolling his eyes. He let out a breath. “It would be hard regardless who’s with me. I thought of taking Auguste in there with me, but... but yes, actually I think I’d rather have Damen.”

“It can serve in two ways,” Dr. Shaw said nodding. “It will help you finally let go of the hold that room has on you, so it will help in your recovery and I believe it will help in bringing you and Damen closer together.”

“Yes,” Laurent said nodding. “His nature is to take care of me.”

“Yes and I think it’ll also help him seeing you dealing with things, he will see you moving on.” Laurent nodded. “Ever thought of bringing Damen with you to therapy? It may help with him opening up about the years you were apart.”

“I’m sure Damen would come if I asked without a doubt. But I don’t think he would come here to expect to talk about himself,” Laurent said thoughtfully. “We’re not yet at a point where I feel I need help in getting him to talk, as hard as it may be. I feel it’s a subject little by little I can get him to open up about.”

“Ok,” Dr. Shaw said.

They continued with other matters and then time was up. Laurent hugged Dr. Shaw warmly. He was glad Dr. Cormier had recommended her.

* * *

Laurent was on Damen’s couch reading when he came home Friday afternoon. 

“Hey,” Damen said with a huge smile on his face. 

“Hi,” Laurent said, sitting up. Damen put his messenger bag down and slipped his shoes off. He made his way to the couch and took Laurent in his arms, quickly pulling him onto his lap and kissing him. Laurent smiled at him and caressed his chest. He felt wonderful in Damen’s arms. 

“How was your day handsome?” He asked looking over Damen’s face. 

“Good,” he said. “Another week and a half of school left.”

Laurent nodded. “Then summer.”

“Then summer,” Damen said. 

“I was wondering -“ 

Damen’s cell phone began ringing interrupting Laurent. “Oh I’m sorry,” Damen said and took it out of his pants. “Oh it’s Nik.”

Laurent nodded and was about to slip off Damen’s lap, but Damen held him close as he answered the phone. “Hello?”

Laurent stayed where he was. He leaned forward and rested his forehead on Damen’s neck. He would wait for Damen to finish the school year before he asked him to help him deal with the memories his old bedroom at home. It only seemed fair. 

“Yeah! Sounds good! We will be there around 7 then?”

Laurent sat up and looked at Damen who grinned at him. “Ok, see you later. Bye.”

Damen hung up. “What’s up?” Laurent asked. 

“Nik wants to go out. He and Erasmus want to go to a new place that opened. It has live music. They want us to meet them there for dinner around seven. He said he would call some more of our frat brothers as well.”

Laurent nodded. “Yeah, sounds like fun!”

“But you were wondering something earlier?”

“Yeah!” Laurent said. “I was wondering if you’d like to spend tonight and tomorrow night at my place?”

“Yeah!” Damen said so happily it made Laurent laugh. “What’s so funny?” Damen asked. 

“You’re so gorgeous,” Laurent said, caressing Damen’s face. “So good to me.”

“I want to be good to you,” Damen said softly. 

Laurent took a breath. “I went to go talk to the doctor I was referred to this morning.”

“Oh,” Damen said surprised. “Oh I didn’t know, you didn’t say.”

“No, I didn’t. Not because I wanted to keep it from you, I just wanted to be clear headed when I went in to talk to her, and I knew I would tell you after,” Laurent said, caressing Damen’s chest through this button up shirt again.

“Ok, baby,” Damen said. “It went well?” 

“It did,” Laurent said his hand slid up to Damen’s neck. Damen closed his eyes, a pleased smile on his face as Laurent kept caressing him. Laurent loved the look on his face.

“Wanna shower together before we go out?” Laurent asked in a husky whisper. 

Damen opened his eyes. He looked at Laurent’s lips and nodded. 

They stood up and Laurent led Damen to the bathroom. Once inside, Laurent quickly slipped off his shirt and jogging pants, pushing his boxers down with them. Damen stared at Laurent’s body. Laurent pushed Damen against the bathroom counter. He pulled off his tie as Damen reached back and pulled Laurent’s hair loose. 

“God you’re beautiful,” Damen whispered. Laurent untucked his shirt and had began to unbutton it. Damen leaned in and kissed Laurent hungrily. Laurent finished with with shirt and pulled it off. He pushed the shirt off his shoulders and down his arms, discarding the undershirt immediately after. Laurent leaned in and began to kiss Damen’s chest. 

Damen let out a moan as Laurent’s tongue circled his left nipple. Laurent gently tugged it with his teeth. “Fuck,” Damen said.

Laurent grinned and went for Damen’s pants. He undid then and pushed them and his boxers past his hips. They fell and Damen stepped out of them. He reached and pulled off his socks. Laurent gazed down Damen’s body. Damen wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close as they began to kiss. Damen felt so warm. Laurent loved the feel of their bodies together. 

Damen ran his hands up and down Laurent’s back. He loved this, this new found openness and ease with which Laurent was acting with sexually. Laurent was beautiful like this. Open. They pulled back and Damen caressed Laurent’s cheek. Laurent leaned into his palm and kissed it, eyes closed. He leaned forward to kiss Damen again and Damen’s hand slid to the back of Laurent’s head. He wrapped his fingers in the fine blond hair. 

Laurent moaned on Damen’s lips and then kissed down his neck. He peppered the expanse of Damen’s chest with soft, sweet kisses and then slid down on his knees. Damen felt his breath leave him. He still couldn’t believe this sometimes. There was a part of him that truly felt he needed to pinch himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. He felt as he did five years ago and was afraid a stupid mistake would sent Laurent running. 

Laurent looked up and gave Damen a radiant smile. Damen didn’t even know how to handle it. “Relax,” Laurent said softly and pulled on Damen’s fingers. It was then he realized he had been gripping the edge of the bathroom counter. Damen let our a breathy laugh and let go of the counter and then Laurent took him in his mouth. 

“Oh fuck!” Damen said, not being able to hold back. Laurent sucked slowly and swirled his tongue around Damen. He wanted to take his time and please him. “Oh god! That’s amazing!” Damen moaned. 

Laurent tried to not laugh, although he couldn’t anyway, given the fact his mouth was full. He caressed Damen’s muscular thighs and slowly slid Damen in and out of his mouth, pressing his lips around his hard on and caressing it with his tongue.

He felt the trembling of Damen’s thighs and felt Damen’s hand slide in his hair. That made Laurent happy. He wanted Damen to relax and enjoy this. He knew Damen always went back to the memories of years past, when sexual interaction had been such a struggle for him. When each kiss and caress was met with a voice in his head telling him he shouldn’t be doing it or enjoying it.

It was different now. There was no shame for wanting it and no dark memories trying to engulf him. It was just the here and now, Damen and him, in this moment, enjoying each other’s bodies. And what a beautiful body Damen had. Laurent admired it. He wanted to show it love and attention and admiration. He wished to show Damen how much he absolutely loved his body. He slid him out and looked up. He grinned as he saw Damen’s face. 

His eyes were closed and his expression intense. Damen panted and opened his eyes. He locked gazes with Laurent. 

“Your body is perfection,” Laurent said. “You are so incredibly sexy. So hot,” he continued. He bit his bottom lip. “You turned me on so much.”

Damen couldn’t help the stupid, happy grin that spread across his face and he watched as Laurent took him in his mouth again. He felt Laurent’s hands on his thighs, his right hand travelled up to his lower abdomen, palm pressed against his skin. Damen took deep, slow breaths. He didn’t want to come yet. He wanted this to go on forever. 

Laurent continued sliding him in and out, sucking and pressing his tongue against him. It went on for a long, glorious moment until he came and Laurent swallowed his release. 

Once he was done, Damen pulled him up and kissed him. He was still trembling and panting from his orgasm. It had been amazing. He gazed into Laurent’s eyes. “That was mind blowing,” he said. 

Laurent chuckled. “Good,” he said. 

Damen reached down and began to stroke Laurent as he leaned against him and kissed him. Laurent leaned more into him. Damen felt Laurent surrender complete control over to him. He turned and dropped to his knees. He took Laurent’s erection in his mouth. Damen loved how Laurent tasted. He slid his hand up Laurent’s left leg and once he reached his knee, he bent it and Laurent slid his leg over his shoulder. Damen’s large hands were strong and held him steady and Laurent gave in to all he was feeling. He leaned his head back and moaned, as loudly as he wanted to. He groaned and moaned, his right hand fisted in Damen’s curls and he moved his hips along with Damen’s movements. 

Damen had never felt more alive. He felt so pleased providing Laurent with pleasure. All the sounds Laurent made were perfect and amazing. Damen continued pleasing Laurent until he felt Laurent begin to tense around him and then come in his mouth. Damen greedily swallowed his release. Laurent panted as soft, small moans escaped him. 

Damen stood up and wrapped him in his arms. Laurent pressed into his chest. “That felt amazing,” he said between pants. 

Damen grinned. “Good,” he said, caressing Laurent’s hair. 

They held each other a moment, until Laurent had calmed down. They finally pulled apart. “Ready for that shower?” Damen asked with a half smile. 

“Yeah,” Laurent said chuckling. 


	43. XLIII

Laurent and Damen reached the place about 7:15. They exited Damen’s car and walked in holding hands. Everyone was already there. They had put three tables together to accommodate everyone. Laurent smiled and waved. He wasn’t as anxious as he had been Memorial Day weekend, he knew everyone now. He grinned and hugged Erasmus, sitting beside him, Damen on his other side. 

“You look  happy ,” Erasmus said raising his right eyebrow. 

Laurent grinned and shrugged. “I sure am!” He said. 

Everyone was chatting as a waiter came and took their drink orders. There were some people preparing equipment on a small platform stage. Laurent engaged in the conversation happening at the table. He looked at Damen as he joked around with his friends. He looked so handsome. Laurent lovingly stroked his cheek and kissed it. Damen beamed at him. 

Ordering food took a while, but finally it was done and they all began chatting amongst themselves again. Laurent looked at the stage which looked ready now. “Who’s playing?” He asked Erasmus. 

Erasmus shrugged. “A local band.”

Laurent nodded and looked around and suddenly froze as he saw a familiar figure leaning on a table the closest to the stage. It was Jokaste. She was in jeans and baggy knit sweater hanging off one shoulder. Her hair was down, a cascade of blonde curls. She was with a man. He was tanned with short dark hair. He was all in black, an arm wrapped around her waist. They leaned in and kissed. He glanced over at Damen who didn’t even seem to notice she was there. 

Laurent was wandering if he should mention it to Damen when their food came. It took three waiters and there was a lot of talking and commotion while the food was being handed out. Finally, minutes later as everyone settled down and began to eat, Laurent looked up and saw Jokaste was no where to be seen. 

They all began to eat and chat and laugh. Laurent was feeling more and more comfortable with Damen’s friends. It was about 8 pm when the band was introduced. Laurent glanced over and did a double take as the lead singer came to the mic. 

“Hey, hope everyone is having a good night,” Nicaise said in a suave voice. His curls were extra curly and shiny. He seemed to have a bit of black eyeliner. He looked really good. He had a red guitar. He was in black skinny jeans and white tee shirt. A dark blue scarf infinity scarf round his neck. “This is my favorite song by Muse. It’s called Undisclosed Desires.”

The band began to play. Laurent saw the man Jokaste had been making out with was playing bass. Erasmus looked at Laurent. “Did we go to school with him?”

Laurent nodded. “Nicaise,” he said. 

“Oh! Wow! That’s him?” Erasmus asked. 

“Who’s him?” Damen asked on the other side of Laurent. 

Laurent glanced over at him. “The singer of the band used to go to school with us,” Laurent said. 

“He did? I don’t remember him,” Damen said looking at Nicaise. Laurent looked back at him as he sang. 

_“I want to reconcile the violence in your heart. I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask. I want to exorcise the demons from your past. I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart…”_

“He left,” Erasmus said leaning forward and talking to Damen. “He had a crush on Laurent and was jealous Laurent spent all his time with me.”

“He did not,” Laurent said furrowing his brow. 

“Yes he  did ,” Erasmus said. “It was so obvious. You were never interested, like you were never interested in anyone else, until Damen came along, but he was crushing on you so hard.”

Damen looked over at Nicaise and sized him up. He wasn’t ugly, on the contrary, he had a very pretty face. Beautiful, even. But Damen felt Laurent wouldn’t be attracted to that. Nicaise was thin and graceful, like Laurent, like Erasmus, but Damen felt that wasn’t Laurent’s type. Damen felt _he_ was Laurent’s type. 

“Damen!” 

“Huh? What?” Damen asked looking back at Laurent. He had a cute grin on his face. 

“I was asking if you wanted to share a dessert?” Laurent asked. 

“Yeah! Whatever you want,” he said nodding up at the waiter that had appeared. 

The band continued to play and Damen kept glancing over at the stage. “So were you good friends?” Damen asked when the waiter brought the big brownie with vanilla ice cream on top. He fed some to Laurent. 

Laurent looked confused. “Who? Oh!” He said and swallowed. “You mean Nicaise and I?” Damen nodded. He licked his lips. “Well, his father actually manages our hotel in New York.” Damen blinked. “Um, he got the job when Nicaise was 11 or 12 and then they bought a house here and he went to school with us for a few years...” Laurent swallowed. Damen looked at Laurent’s face. 

“Why did he leave?”

Laurent opened his mouth as if to answer, but said nothing. “I don’t... I don’t want to talk about it here,” he said leaning close into Damen. 

Damen looked into Laurent’s blue eyes. He could see he felt uneasy by the subject which surprised Damen. “Yeah. Ok, baby,” Damen said and leaned in and kissed Laurent. It was a soft peck but then Laurent leaned in for more. They kissed a moment and then finished their dessert. 

When the band finished playing they all clapped. The band played a few more songs. They were pretty good and Nicaise was a good singer. Laurent had no idea he could sing or play guitar. Laurent was leaning against Damen when Damen whispered in his ear. “Is he the one you met with?”

“Yes,” Laurent said quietly. 

Damen looked at Nicaise again. He was even more curious now about what he had wanted. 

* * *

They were all getting up pooling money together to pay the bill. The band had finished playing. They would play again in a while, they had said, but everyone was getting ready to go. More patrons were coming into the restaurant. Laurent and Damen stood and slowly started making their way out with everyone else. 

“Laurent!” 

Damen and Laurent turned. It was Nicaise. Huge smile on face as he walked towards the group. Laurent felt Damen take hold of his hand. 

“Nicaise!” Laurent said. Damen had a tight hold of his hand still, so when Nicaise got close and gave him a hug, he gave him a one arm hug back, patting him on the back. They pulled back. “You’re really good!”

“Thanks!” He said grinning. 

“Bye!” Erasmus called out. 

“Oh give us a minute, we’re coming!” Damen said. 

“Nicaise, this is my boyfriend, Damianos,” Laurent said, putting his hand on Damen’s chest. “Baby, this is Nicaise.” Laurent said smiling at Damen. 

“Hi, Nicaise, nice to meet you,” Damen said with a charming smile, holding his right hand out, left hand still clasping Laurent’s. 

“Nice to meet you,” Nicaise said smiling back and looking back and forth between them. “Glad you enjoyed the show,” he said. “You bought any of my art?” He asked jokingly. 

“Not yet! But I’ve not had time to look at all of it yet!”

“Ok, then,” he said nodding. “Good seeing you. Come see me sing again. We’re home all summer.”

“Will, do,” Laurent said glancing up at Damen who looked down at him. 

“Ok kept you long enough. Take care, both of you.”

“Bye,” Laurent and Damen said and turned and walked out of the restaurant. 

* * *

They drove to Laurent’s home. Damen had brought and overnight bag with him already. Laurent kept glancing at Damen. He had felt Damen had been bothered by Erasmus’s comment. He wanted to say something but wasn’t sure exactly what. 

“You ok?” Laurent asked. 

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Damen answered, as Laurent expected him to. 

“I never saw Nicaise that way,” Laurent said simply. It was the truth. A plain and simple statement. 

Damen let out a breath. They stopped at a red light. Damen looked at Laurent. “Did I fuck up? Was I..? I know I held your hand the whole time he was there,” Damen shook his head. 

Laurent chuckled and slid his left hand up Damen’s arm, gently squeezing his muscular bicep. “It was cute. I wasn’t bothered. But I don’t want you bothered either baby.”

“I’m not,” Damen said. Laurent raised his eye brows. Damen rolled his eyes. “Ok. Ok. When Erasmus said he had a crush on you, I, you know, compared.”

“Compared?” Laurent was grinning. 

“Compared. He and I. I felt I’m you’re type and he...”

Laurent let out a loud laugh. The light turned and Damen looked quickly between the road and Laurent, loving how beautiful he looked laughing. 

“Oh Damen,” Laurent said leaning his head back on the head rest. “Yes. You’re my type and I only have one type. I will only ever have one type.” Damen felt his cheeks warm. “Baby, I love you,” Laurent said caressing the back of Damen’s hair. “So much.”

Damen glanced over at Laurent. “I love you too,” he said. They clasped their hands together as Damen drove on. 


	44. XLIV

Laurent and Damen walked inside Laurent’s home. 

“Want anything?” Laurent asked as he led him into the dining room and down the hall to the kitchen. 

“Just some water,” Damen said. 

Laurent grabbed a couple of bottles. Damen settled into a stool as Laurent handed him the bottle of water. 

“So... what’s the deal with Nicaise?” Asked Damen. 

Laurent thought as he drank. He knew if it was him he wouldn’t want anyone knowing he was abused... on the other hand, he told Damen everything. Laurent sighed. 

“Baby if you can’t tell me...” Damen began as he watched Laurent’s face. He showed more emotion now and Damen was becoming very good at knowing what his facial expressions meant. 

“It’s just hard because I wish to share everything with you,” Laurent said softly. 

“Thank you,” Damen said and leaned in and kissed Laurent. “So... he mentioned art?”

“He paints,” Laurent said pulling his phone out of his pocket and going to the website. He handed it to Damen who began to scroll through it. 

“Oh, interesting,” he said as he looked through. Laurent nodded. He rubbed Damen’s thigh through his jeans as he finished his bottle of water. “Huh,” Damen said. “This... uh this looks a lot like you.”

Laurent looked at his phone screen. He took it from Damen’s hand. It was a man, face turned away, shoulder length hair tucked behind his ear. He was leaning over the corner of a table. He was topless, fitted pants on, hair falling over his shoulder. The painting went to the man’s knees. 

“He’s bluish and his hair is dark and he’s looking away,” Laurent said looking confused. 

Damen raised his eye brows. “I realize, you being  you , you have no idea what the lines of your body look like. And Nicaise is an artist and has taken artistic liberties with the shades of color he’s used, but the line of the back, the way the muscles are flex on the bicep and the way the lower back is curved and even the curve of the ass and hips,” Damen grabbed Laurent’s backside as he said that. “That’s you, baby.”

Laurent looked back at his phone. “Then I’ll buy it,” he said. 

“What?” Damen asked, shocked. 

“It’ll look wonderful in your apartment. Don’t you think?” Laurent asked. 

Damen began to smile. “Yeah,” he said. “Yeah it will.”

* * *

Damen and Laurent had made their way upstairs. After brushing their teeth and undressing, changing into sleep shorts, Laurent sat in bed and just thought about the day and how the evening had turned out. 

Laurent was sitting back on the bed, right leg bent up to his chest so Damen assumed he wasn’t sleepy and wanted to talk. Damen was talking and Laurent was wanting to focus but he was having a hard time doing it, his mind was racing. He felt he couldn’t concentrate. 

“Laurent?” Damen asked. It took Laurent a moment to react. 

He finally looked at Damen. “I’m sorry, what?”

Damen furrowed his brow sliding closer towards him. “Baby you ok?”

Laurent took a deep breath in and out and closed his eyes. He needed to be strong and share. He knew Damen wanted to help him. “No,” he said simply. 

“What’s wrong?”

Laurent looked into Damen’s eyes. “Tonight has felt like a bit... too much.” It had not felt so bad on the ride home, but with the talk of the painting things had felt more uncomfortable for Laurent. 

“How so, baby?” Damen asked. His concern was apparent and Laurent felt so much better just hearing it. He leaned into Damen and after some maneuvering, Damen ended up leaning back against the headboard with Laurent straddling him, leaning into his chest. Damen was lovingly holding him and stroking his hair. 

“It... it still makes me uncomfortable to have someone I don’t feel safe with find me... attractive,” Laurent said softly. The truth was he only felt safe with Damen.

“Ok?” Damen said, still not fully understanding. 

“With Erasmus saying Nicaise used to have a crush on me, I didn’t like it but that was years ago, but then you saying the painting he did looked like me...” Laurent shook his head. “It may all be nothing and mean nothing -“

“But to you, it means something,” Damen said as he laid his cheek on Laurent’s head. “It makes you uncomfortable.”

“Yeah,” Laurent said. 

“Unwanted attention makes you uncomfortable.”

“Yes,” Laurent said closing his eyes. 

Damen held Laurent close. It made sense. Unwanted attention had hurt him before and now, no matter how small or how, supposedly, harmless the person was, Damen assumed harmless since he himself did not know this Nicaise, it triggered alarm in Laurent. 

“I understand baby,” Damen said softly. “It’s ok, I’ll keep you safe. I promise.”

Laurent wrapped his arms around Damen and squeezed him tight. Nothing calmed him like being in Damen’s arms. “I feel silly but I can’t help what I’m feeling,” Laurent further explained. 

“Your feelings are totally valid, my love,” Damen said softly. “You can’t control what others feel, but, I swear to you, Laurent, no one will ever hurt you. I promise.”

Laurent smiled into Damen’s chest and nodded. He kissed across his chest. He sat up and looked into Damen’s eyes. “I believe you,” he whispered. 

Damen reached up and stroked Laurent’s cheeks with his thumbs. The way his heart felt at that moment... “I love you so much,” he whispered. “I love you so, so much.”

Laurent gave him a soft smile and looked down almost shyly. “I love you just as much,” Laurent replied. “I...” he drifted off. Damen stayed still and quiet and gave him time. He would give Laurent all the time he needed. “I feel so safe with you,” Laurent said. “I want to share everything with you.”

“I feel the same way, Laurent,” Damen told him. 

Laurent leaned in and kissed him. Damen ran his hands down his back, softly caressing his skin. Laurent leaned into his chest again. “When everything is noisy,” he whispered. “You’re my quiet.”

Damen smiled. Hearing that made him feel amazing. “I want to give you everything you need.”

“You do and you have a hundred times over.”

Damen grinned. “Good.”

“I want to give you everything you need too,” Laurent said. 

“You do,” Damen said. 

They sat like this for a while until they settled down on the bed. Laurent curled up closely to Damen, who gladly wrapped him up in his arms. He knew he would do anything for Laurent. Anything. Damen waited until he heard Laurent’s breathing change and he knew he was asleep before he let himself drift off into a peaceful sleep. 

* * *

Damen blinked his eyes as he awoke. He stretched and took a deep breath in. Laurent was warm and still curled into him. The sun was barely rising. Laurent stirred and squeezed Damen tight. They slowly woke up together. Damen felt so peaceful. Laurent’s skin was so soft and warm and smelled wonderful. His brain was still a little fuzzy. He began to kiss Laurent, down the side of his face to his neck. 

Laurent let out a soft moan that stirred something inside Damen. He rolled on top of Laurent, lips urgently pressing into Laurent’s skin. Laurent slid his hands across Damen’s broad shoulders, his left hand sliding up the back of Damen’s head into his curls. Laurent opened his legs for Damen. He pushed his hips up.

Damen pushed up. He looked down at Laurent. His eyes were dark. They were both wanting...

Laurent pulled him down and kissed him hard. Their bodies pressed together, grinding, seeking pleasure. A soft moan escaped Laurent’s lips. Damen kissed his neck, just the way he liked. Laurent wrapped his legs around Damen, pulling him closer. Damen groaned as his hard on rubbed Laurent’s between their bodies. Laurent was panting, eyes dark. 

Damen worked his way down. He didn’t waste any time. He began to suck Laurent earnestly.Laurent lifted his hips off the bed. It felt good. So good. 

“I want more,” he said without thinking. Damen released him and looked up him. “I want more,” he repeated softly. Damen nodded. 

“Do you have lube?” Damen asked. Laurent shook his head, the pounding of his heart loud in his ears. “Ok,” he said. 

“I... wait,” Laurent said. He slid out from under Damen and got off the bed, walking quickly to his bathroom and grabbed the small tub of Vaseline he had. He came back to bed and handed it to Damen, sliding back under him. He trusted Damen. He was ready for whatever Damen wanted. 

Damen kissed across his lower abdomen. Laurent leaned back and closed his eyes. Damen took him in his mouth again. Laurent bent his right knee and slid it over Damen’s shoulder, he was gently tugging at his hair. He felt Damen’s right hand caressing his backside, he then felt Damen’s fingers circling his entrance. Laurent gasped. 

He felt Damen slide one finger in. His hips rocked. He wasn’t tense or nervous. This felt good and right. After a moment, Damen slid a second finger in. Laurent felt a bit of a sting as his body stretched. He groaned. He pushed Damen’s head down, and Damen began to suck him again. His mouth and fingers working in tandem to bring Laurent pleasure. 

Laurent was pushing his hips off the bed, seeking the warmth of Damen’s mouth. “So good,” he told Damen between moans. “You suck me so good.”

Damen loved hearing this. Laurent’s thighs were trembling, the warmth of them by his face, he knew he would never wish to be anywhere else. Laurent let out a loud groan as his body began to tense. He began to work his hips between Damen’s mouth and fingers. Damen added a third finger and Laurent’s voice broke as he let out a cry. Damen kept his mouth firmly around him, he felt Laurent’s heel press into his back as he pushed his hips up to thrust his throbbing hard on into Damen’s mouth while his hot, tight body took his fingers in. 

Laurent’s pace was erratic, he had completely let go and had let his body just take over. He cried out in ecstasy as the orgasm build and then it came forth with great force. Laurent almost violently pulled on Damen’s hair, he didn’t know if he wanted to push into Damen’s mouth or force Damen’s fingers deeper into him. He tried to do both as Damen swallowed his release. Laurent fell back on the bed, panting. Damen slowly released him, his cock was so sensitive. He then slid his fingers out and Laurent felt an ache he hadn’t felt in years. It felt so  good .

He laid in bed panting. He could feel the heat in his cheeks, neck and chest. He brought the back of his hand to his neck, wiping some sweat away. He closed his eyes an tried to catch his breath. 

He felt Damen’s gentle bite at his hip. He chuckled as Damen began to leave a mark on him. He ran his fingers through Damen’s hair. Damen pushed up when he was done. 

“I think you enjoyed that,” Damen said with a grin. 

“I know I did,” Laurent said, grinning back. He pushed up into a seating position and then up on his knees. He began to kiss Damen, gently pushing him down. Once Damen was on his back, he settledbetween his legs and began to suck Damen. It didn’t take long, Damen came with a loud cry of his own, Laurent gently caressed his thighs as he tried to catch his breath. On a whim, he bit above his left nipple, sucking hard and gently biting with his teeth. Damen grinned at this. Once Laurent was done, his lips were red and shiny. “I figured I should give you one too!” He said laughing. 

Damen cupped his cheek. “You keep getting more and more beautiful,” he said softly. 

“Can we spend every weekend like this?” Laurent asked. 

“You mean naked and in bed? Yeah!” Damen said. 

Laurent laughed and Damen tickled him which made him laugh harder. Damen dug his fingers in a little harder and Laurent tried to get away but it was useless. They ended up falling over on the bed, Laurent trying to squirm away as Damen held him close. Finally he stopped. 

Damen looked over Laurent’s face. “We can spend every weekend like this,” Damen whispered. 

Laurent kissed his nose. “Forever?” He asked softly. 

“Forever,” Damen murmured and softly kissed his lips. 


	45. XLV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _It’s been a long time coming..._   
>  _Enjoy!_

“I’m ready for sex,” Laurent told Dr. Shaw. 

She smiled warmly at him. “That sounds good!”

It had been two and a half weeks since the Nicaise incident and today was Damen’s last day at the school. They would be spending the whole weekend at Laurent’s place and Laurent was ready. 

“So, let’s talk about the bedroom,” she said jotting down some notes. 

Laurent nodded. “It... he abused me in my bedroom the first time and then we had dinner as if nothing happened. I remember feeling worried a maid would see the bedding and know and I ripped the bedding off it and tried to put it to wash but I didn’t even know how to work the washing machine. I threw up all over it and then a maid found me and assumed I had brought them because I got sick.”

Dr. Shaw nodded. 

“She tried to take me back to my room but I had fit. Said I wasn’t going to sleep in that room. I went across the hall. Stayed there since. He never came to my room again. Everything else happened on his office or his bedroom.”

“The wing you will get rid of?”

“Yes,” Laurent said nodding. 

“You never though of selling the home?”

“No,” Laurent said calmly. “That’s the home my mom and dad raised my brother and I in and I have fond memories of if, more fond than bad and I don’t want to let that go.”

Dr. Shaw nodded. “I understand,” she said. “So you plan to walk into the bedroom with Damen and tell him what happened?”

Laurent nodded. “And then I can finally let go,” he said softly. 

“You have my number?”

“I do,” Laurent said nodded. 

“Call me if you need anything,” she said. 

* * *

Laurent was the type of person that when his mind was made up to do something... he just did it. He had to. He waited at Damen’s patiently. He looked over at the hallway leading to the bedroom. The painting he had bought from Nicaise was hanging on the wall. His eyes wondered over it. He still didn’t see the resemblance, but whatever, Damen was happy and Nicaise was happy to make the sale.

He went back to the journal he was writing in. He was just writing his train of thought. The lock turned and he shut his journal and looked towards the door and watched Damen walk in. As always, Damen was all smiles. Laurent was flooded with warmth and happiness. He stood up to greet him and hugged and kissed him. 

“I packed your bag,” Laurent said, flexing his fingers into fists. 

“Oh!” Damen said surprised. He kissed Laurent’s forehead. “Come on then, I’ll change and we can go.”

“Ok,” Laurent said with a smile and walked to the bedroom after him and watched as he changed. “What did you want to eat for dinner?” He asked. 

“Anything you want, baby,” Damen said. “Your cooks have anything planned?” He asked. 

“I gave them the weekend off,” Laurent said. “Including Mrs. Paschal.”

“Oh!” Damen for a second time. “Just us then?” Laurent nodded. “Good,” Damen said once he had changed. He crossed the room and wrapped his arms around Laurent, pulling him closer and kissing him gently. 

They left soon after in Laurent’s car. He felt an anxiousness in his stomach. He wondered how Damen would react to him being open about what he wanted to be open about... he was nervous, but he also knew Damen was extremely supportive. Amazingly so. And he had never failed Laurent. On the contrary, Laurent felt Damen had truly gone above and beyond what many other boyfriends would have. This thought calmed Laurent and he reached and held Damen’s hand. They glanced at each other and smiled. Laurent knew he was lucky. 

* * *

They had settled on the large leather couch in the media room with some snacks and drinks and had put on a show about the most haunted houses in America. 

Laurent glanced over at Damen. “So tell me about your last day of school.”

“It was great. We had a little party and the kids danced. They’re all Beyoncé fans,” Damen said shaking his head and laughing. Laurent laughed. “It was fun. It was great. Now... two months off,” Damen said sliding his arms around Laurent and sliding him closer. “With you.”

“Yes, with me,” Laurent said and leaned in to kiss him. He pushed up and slid his right leg over Damen, settling on his lap. Damen slid his hands inside Laurent’s shirt and caressed up and down his back a couple of times and then slid his fingers inside the waistband of Laurent’s lounge pants. Laurent breathed out over Damen’s lips. He pushed his hips down onto Damen. “I’m ready,” he whispered. 

Laurent opened his eyes and looked into Damen’s beautiful brown eyes. “Are you?” Damen asked, barely whispering. Laurent saw how much what he had said affected Damen.

Laurent nodded. “I’m ready. That’s why no one is here.”

Damen grinned. “You had it planned?”

Laurent nodded and felt his cheeks warm. He kissed Damen deeply. His heart was thumping crazily in his chest. He leaned his forehead on Damen’s. “But first...” Laurent said softly. “There is something I...” he swallowed and closed his eyes. “Something I want, well need, to show you so I can...”

Laurent pulled back and Damen was gazing at him intently, softly stroking his hair in a loving manner. “Does it have to do with your uncle?”

Laurent nodded. 

“Show me baby,” Damen said. 

Laurent got up and held his hand out, Damen took it and Laurent pulled him up off the couch and they crossed the media room, exiting into the entrance hallway and turning right towards the stairs. Laurent led the way, Damen one step behind him. He turned right at the top of the stairs. He suddenly realized how tightly he was gripping Damen’s hand. Damen didn’t seem bothered and Laurent didn’t want to loosen his grip, so he didn’t. He held on tightly. 

They walked to the first door on the left. His old bedroom. All Laurent could hear was the beating of his heart in his ears. He hadn’t been in there in years. The maids had moved his belongings into his new bedroom once he had said he was moving over. He also knew the bedroom was void of furniture. He had orderedit thrown away. His right hand still gripping Damen’s left, Laurent opened the door and stepped inside. He flicked the light on.

It was just a room. An empty room. Just a room. Damen slid his arms around Laurent from behind. He seemed to understand. 

“Is this where he...” Damen trailed off. His voice had sounded rough. 

“Just once,” Laurent answered. His voice small. “The first time.”

Damen let out a breath and then seemed to stop breathing. He squeezed Laurent tightly. Laurent looked around. It wasn’t as scary as he imagined. Not with Damen there. He stood back, Damen dropped his arms, and Laurent stepped inside more. 

“No one has known... until you.” He looked back at Damen who stepped beside him, taking his hand again. 

“You don’t have to be afraid of this room,” Damen said. “Not anymore.”

Laurent was breathing heavily. He looked into Damen’s soft brown eyes. While looking into them, Laurent would believe anything Damen said. “Say that again,” he said, furrowing his brow, there was a tightening in his chest. 

“You don’t have to be afraid of this room anymore,” Damen repeated. His voice sounded more sure. “Not anymore.” Laurent nodded. He kept looking into his eyes as Damen stepped closer. “Not ever again.”

Laurent reached up and slid his hands behind Damen’s neck and pulled him into a deep kiss. He pulled back and looked into his eyes again. “You make me feel so safe,” he said, voice thick with emotion. 

“I will always do everything I can to keep you safe, baby,” Damen replied. 

“Take me to bed,” Laurent whispered. 

Damen didn’t have to be told twice. He would be lying if he said he hadn’t been craving this, needing this, dreaming about this. Laurent was so open and receptive to everything sexual they did. It was intoxicating. Damen couldn’t wait. He could hardly wait. He walked down the hallway with Laurent in tow, this time Damen leading the way. The bedroom was left behind. Damen would walk in there with Laurent as many times as it took until he wasn’t afraid of the room and its dark memories anymore. 

They reached the master bedroom and Damen turned around, facing Laurent.

“I have lube in the bedside table,” Laurent said. 

Damen nodded. “Condoms?” He asked. 

“I’ve been tested. Its only ever been you,” Laurent replied, a slight blush appearing on his cheeks. 

Damen took his face in his hands. “I’ve been tested too and I’ve not been with anyone since you.”

“Ok, then,” Laurent whispered, settling the matter. 

Damen’s heart thumped in his chest. He pulled Laurent close. “You’ve always made me feel like an inexperienced boy,” Damen said, slightly breathless. He felt Laurent chuckle slightly. He pulled back. Laurent had a lovely happy expression on his face. 

“Do I?”

“You do,” Damen said. He licked his lips. He didn’t want to ruin the mood but... he needed to ask. “Why did you have to show me the bedroom before we could do this?”

Laurent nodded. “I wanted no secrets between us,” he explained softly. “My secrets drove a wedge between us last time and I wasn’t able to surrender myself fully. I want to this time.”

Damen reached up and held Laurent’s face in his hands. “Thank you, for trusting me,” Damen told him. 

Laurent felt a warmth spread through him. He knew he loved Damen and he was amazed at how much more deeply he could fall in love with him. “Damianos,” Laurent whispered. “Kiss me.”

Damen leaned in and kissed Laurent. It began soft and tender and then deepened as they walked towards the bed. Damen pulled his shirt off and quickly slid his pants and boxers off at once. Damen then slid Laurent’s shirt off. He practically lifted Laurent, wrapping his strong muscular arm around his waist and pulling him close. Laurent wrapped his arms around Damen’s neck. Damen laid him on his back and kissed down his chest. His hand caressed Laurent’s side as his tongue swirled around his small pink nipples. 

Laurent groaned, tugging at Damen’s hair. Damen then slid his pants and boxers down, taking Laurent in his mouth as soon as his erection sprung forth. Damen sucked him eagerly, hungrily readying himself for what was to come. Laurent pushed his hips up, fucking Damen’s mouth, giving into all he was feeling. 

Damen released him and quickly moved forward, kissing Laurent, crushing his lips and sliding his tongue in. “I need you,” he said roughly. Laurent felt a clenching in his stomach at the way Damen said the words. He simply nodded. Damen pushed up on his knees, reaching for the bed side table and getting the lube from the drawer. He looked down at Laurent, his blue eyes were wide and dark and he was simply perfect. Beautiful and perfect and open emotionally and physically. Damen took his left hand put it on his chest, over his racing heart. He sat back on his feet and looked into Laurent’s eyes. 

“Have you any idea how much I love you?” He asked. 

Laurent was taken aback, but recovered quickly. Of course Damen would be emotional in a moment like this. He pushed up on his knees and kissed Damen. “As much as I love you,” he replied. 

They began to kiss again and Laurent climbed on top. He rubbed his body on Damen’s moaning as his erection left a glistening trail across Damen’s abs. 

“Do you want it like this?” Damen asked with a sexy smile.

Laurent’s heart was hammering against his ribcage. “I want it in every way possible.”

Damen chuckled and began to kiss his neck. “We will do it every way possible,” he whispered, his lips grazing Laurent’s ear, making goosebumps form all over him. Damen grabbed him round the waist and Laurent wrapped his legs around Damen’s waist. Damen ended up leaning against the headboard.Damen poured some lube on his fingers.

Laurent leaned in and began to kiss him and Damen slowly worked him open. The way he did this was so pleasing, as Damen’s left hand slid up and down Laurent’s back, he slid his right index finger in and out of him slowly. Laurent’s breath was hot and moist on his neck, soft moans escaping his lips as Damen slid his second finger in. Laurent moaned and his hips moved back and forth, seeking more. Damen took his time. Laurent’s cock and his were rubbing together. Pleasurable soft moans and pants came from both. Damen inserted a third finger. Laurent was deliciously moaning, his hips responding to the pleasure he was feeling. 

“I’m ready,” Laurent whispered. 

Damen looked up at him. “I think I should -“

“I’m ready!” Laurent repeated, louder. 

Damen nodded. He lathered the lube on his erection generously. Laurent’s breathing was shallow as Damen lined their bodies up. He grabbed a hold of Laurent’s hips and slowly, Laurent lowered himself on Damen. Laurent looked into Damen’s eyes as he slowly slid in. All they were feeling was clear to see. 

Damen did his best to control himself. Laurent’s body was hot and tight and felt exquisite as he slid in deeper. Laurent held his breath as Damen stretched him to the point that it was  _almost_ too painful. But this is how Laurent had wanted it. He wanted to feel Damen in a raw way, emotionally and physically. He had yearned this for years, for the ache that would be Damen entering him anew and finally here it was and it was more magnificent than even his most vivid memories. 

Damen held Laurent’s trembling body, his instinct was always to protect him. “Are you ok?” He asked panting. It all felt so good he had to keep himself in control. He had to take care of Laurent. 

“Yes,” Laurent whispered back. He gently began to kiss Damen’s neck. Damen stayed perfectly still, first because he didn’t want to hurt Laurent, he wanted to give him time to adjust, he knew Laurent hadn’t given him too much time to stretch him and second, he was trying to compose himself. Calm himself down. Laurent felt so good, it all felt  so  good, he knew he could come any second and he wanted to enjoy this for as long as possible. 

They kissed each other. They were soft and gentle kisses, loving and tender and then they got deeper and hotter and Laurent felt his body clench around Damen’s throbbing hard on and began to move on him. The ache felt amazing. Damen held his hips as Laurent sought pleasure that only Damen could give him. Damen leaned back, Laurent’s hands on his shoulders and just watched in a lustful stupor as Laurent rode him. 

His chest was flushed, his skin looked so soft and he was beautiful, almost ethereal. His abdominal muscles flexed under the pale skin. Damen could see the hand marks on his hips where he was hanging on to him. He leaned forward and bit under Laurent’s collarbone. He marked him there and then right above his left nipple. The whole time, Laurent pulled his hair but pushed his face against his body, his hips moving faster as his body stretched. It was still incredibly tight, but the ache was fading and being replaced by a hunger and need for more. 

“Fuck me,” Laurent said between pants, an unmistakable hunger in his voice, his hips still working on Damen. 

Damen looked up, wondering if he had heard right. “What?” He asked. That wasn’t how he and Laurent made love. Damen was always careful, there always seemed to be a barrier he couldn’t cross, he always had to be on alert to make sure Laurent was ok and what they were doing was fine, and he was always careful. 

“Fuck me!” Laurent said looking into his eyes. “Show me how much you want me. Do to me what you’ve always wanted to do to me.” Their faces were so close together, their pants hot on their lips. 

Damen shook his head. “But I have -“

“No. You have not. You’ve not been able to let go because I have never let go,” Laurent said. He clenched his body around Damen’s erection, making Damen groan. “I know,” Laurent whispered. “You’re not rough. You’re a lover by nature. It’s why I love you.” Laurent leaned in and kissed him. “But I also know you’re a man and you hunger and you lust and I want to feel it. I want to feel you. Your hunger. Your lust.” Laurent drew in a shaky breath. “Your full force.”

Damen felt almost hypnotized by Laurent’s eyes and his voice and his words. Damen’s only memories of Laurent in bed were those of a hurt 17 year old who was figuring himself out. Now, Laurent was a man who knew what he wanted.

“Fuck me, Damianos,” Laurent said in a voice that oozed sex and confidence. He leaned in and placed his lips at Damen’s ear. “ Make me yours .”

Damen wasn’t exactly sure how it happened, but he pushed up and turned Laurent around, staying in him the whole time. So much came flooding forth.  So  much. He slid his right arm under Laurent, across his chest and curled his fingers round his left shoulder and began to fuck him. He had never fucked Laurent. He had never let himself even imagine he would ever have such control over Laurent’s body. 

_Make me yours_ , Damen heard in his head as Laurent cried out. Damen worried he had hurt him, but he felt Laurent tilt his hips up and open his legs wider, opening and offering himself up to Damen for his pleasure. Damen groaned and leaned forward, his forehead on the back on of Laurent’s neck and he couldn’t help but bite the skin there as well. Laurent’s body clenched deliciously and Damen, truly, let go. 

Memories flooded him. His first weeks with Laurent and endless icy stares and then their first kiss and Laurent pushing him away just to pull him back in. Damen fucked him hard and rough and it was amazing. Incredibly amazing. He remembered their first time all those years ago, how scared he had been. Laurent whimpered under him now. “Don’t stop. Don’t stop. More.  More .” 

Damen groaned as he pushed even deeper. “Fuck!” He groaned and he held Laurent tight and drove into him. He remembered all the happy times and the heartache of Laurent leaving him. The days and nights he spent crying where he would give anything to just  see  Laurent again. The days he spent alone in his room wishing he could reach out, wishing to hear his voice and see his eyes, even if from afar. Then he remembered his absolute sadness turn to anger as he asked himself how  dare Laurent turn  him  away when he had been nothing but kind and patient and loving and understanding and he repaid him by breaking his heart into a million little pieces. 

Never again, Damen had told himself. Never again would Laurent ever hurt him or break his heart or push him away. “You’re  mine ,” Damen said in a guttural whisper. “I love you so fucking much!”

“Yes!” Laurent whimpered. His whole body felt as it if was on fire. He knew Damen had always been capable of  _this_ , of bending him to his will and there would be nothing Laurent could do about it... but one thing Damen never was, was selfish. Damen was a giving lover who derived such satisfaction from pleasing. Laurent knew this and it was that that had made Laurent feel safe. Safe enough he had let him in deeper than he had let anyone before...

But now, Laurent wanted Damen to be selfish. He wanted Damen to  _take_. To take unapologetically and for once, to worry about nothing and no one but himself. Laurent wanted to feel the full strength and brute force Damen was capable of. Laurent wanted Damen to fulfill his deepest carnal desires using his body and hold nothing back. He wanted Damen to break through the very last barrier Laurent had, grab a hold of him, and stay there with him forever. 

“Fuck! Yes!” Laurent found himself saying. Damen was powerful and so incredibly strong and Laurent loved it all. He loved Damen not holding back, he loved Damen giving in. “Fuck!  _Yes_!” Laurent cried out as Damen hit that spot that made him see starts again and again and again. And before Laurent could truly wrap his mind around all he was feeling, he was coming, untouched. He felt Damen squeeze his arms around him. Laurent was crying out as his body tightened around Damen’s and pulsed deeply as he climaxed and there was nothing Damen could have done to hold his own orgasm back. Laurent pushed him over the edge and then he was emptying himself deep inside Laurent. He had never had an orgasm so good or last for this long. 

They collapsed on the bed. A pile of hot sweaty limbs, tangled up and unable to move for the longest time. They were barely conscious, their minds in a complete stupor from the sudden flood of oxytocin and endorphins. When they could finally move, they reached for each and began to kiss. They kissed deeply and passionately. It felt amazing. 

They finally broke free a moment. “I love you,” Laurent said breathlessly. 

“I love you too,” Damen said and leaned in and began to kiss him again. He never wanted to stop. He never had to. He planned never to. He wanted to kiss Laurent forever. 


	46. XLVI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Another exciting milestone... hope you all enjoy! <3 _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thank you to my lovely and wonderful friend [thecosmicfragments](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecosmicfragments/pseuds/thecosmicfragments) for making this awesome Manip for me! It’s absolutely gorgeous! You’re the best!!

They had fallen asleep after the first time. Then Laurent and Damen had woken up in the middle of night and not having had proper a dinner, woke up starving. 

“God I want some pancakes,” Damen said and they had pulled on sleep shorts and gone downstairs and Laurent had laughed as Damen made pancakes, all the while being silly, trying to flip the pancakes and throwing pieces of fruit at Laurent to catch. Laurent had said he wanted blueberries and strawberries in his. They ate, holding hands. Laurent was feeling so good. So loved. 

Damen was washing the dishes and Laurent came behind him and just held him. He pressed his cheek against his back and rubbed his stomach and chest with his palms. He breathed in his scent. Damen finished and went back upstairs. 

Once back in bed it hadn’t taken long for their kissing to start back up. Damen realized at that point they could take as long as they wanted. They wouldn’t be interrupted. It was a wonderful feeling. 

The second time was slow and sweet. Laurent was on his back, legs wrapped around Damen. Damen kissed Laurent just as gently as he made love to him. To Laurent, the second time seemed to last forever and it was wonderful. 

Damen kissed softly and slowly down his neck, just like he liked. He ran his hands across Damen’s chest and up his neck, his right hand sliding into his dark hair. They looked into each other’s eyes as Damen slowly moved in him. 

“You like it slow, don’t you?” Damen asked lowering himself down on his elbows, his lips softly caressing Laurent’s. 

“Yes,” Laurent said between soft pants. “But I like it anyway with you.” Laurent pulled Damen down to kiss him. Damen leaned down and kissed Laurent.

He softly kissed down along his jaw, making sure his movements were slow and steady. He kissed down Laurent’s neck. He could feel the slow tensing in Laurent. It started in his thighs and then slowly spread up his body. Then he felt his arms tense. In the last moments, as the sun was rising, Damen asked Laurent to open his eyes. 

“Look at me,” Damen whispered. “You’re so beautiful.” Laurent looked at him, lips parted, his soft pants getting a bit more laborious. “I love you so much,” Damen continued. “Everyday I’m going to show you how much I love you.”

His voice was as soft and steady as his thrusts, all culminating in a perfect moment in which Laurent couldn’t hold on anymore and came. It felt to him as if his orgasm came from somewhere deep within him. He felt it through out his body and he watched as it pushed Damen over the edge and he too climaxed. 

They laid there a moment panting and looking into each other’s eyes. It all felt so new. So raw. Maybe even, a bit too much. But Laurent welcomed it. He would rather feel too much and be scared of how much he was feeling than numb himself to all that was Damen and all he could give him. 

“What did I ever do to deserve you?” Laurent asked softly. 

“Don’t you know?” Damen asked softly and he stroked back Laurent’s soft blond hair, panting softly still. “You deserve the world.”

* * *

After sleeping for a few more hours, they got up midday and found it to be the hottest day they’ve had so far. They decided to go swimming. 

It was more Damen swimming after Laurent and grabbing him and kissing him non stop more than anything. Laurent, lithe and slippery was able to get away quite a few times and was actually faster swimmer. 

“It’s all the muscle,” Laurent said with a huge grin. “It weighs you down!”

“You complaining about my muscle?” Damen asked as he dried his hair and they walked into the kitchen. 

“No!” Laurent said grinning. “I  really  like it.”

“Do you?” Damen asked sounding pleased. 

“So much,” Laurent said and then they were making out again. Damen placing Laurent up on the kitchen counter and pushing into him. Laurent wasn’t sure when the bathing suits came off, but they did and then they were rolling on the floor. 

Laurent ended up on top. He brought Damen’s hand between them and Damen wrapped it around both of their erections. Laurent began to thrust. He pushed up, palms on Damen’s chest and closed his eyes. Damen couldn’t tear his eyes away. Laurent was flushed, lips parted, golden hair swaying along with the rhythm of his movements. It was perfect. They came together. Laurent rolled off Damen and laid on the floor beside him. 

“I’ve never...” Damen began. They looked at each other. “I’ve never bottomed.”

“You’d be my first if we... if I ever...” Laurent whispered, although the figured Damen already knew that. He suddenly looked away, his heart was pounding. 

“Does... does the thought scare you?” Damen asked. 

“No,” he said quickly and Damen believed him. “Nothing scares me when it’s between us.”

“Then?” Damen asked softly. 

“I just... I just never...” Laurent trailed off. His stomach grumbled and Damen chuckled and got up, and pulled Laurent to his feet. 

They got some fruit and then watched a movie and after that began to cook dinner. The atmosphere was warm and relaxed and Laurent was happy. So happy. They sat and ate dinner and talked about everything and nothing. Afterwards, once the dishes and kitchen had been cleaned, they watched Jeopardy, which Laurent won again. 

“I should start playing for stuff,” Laurent said when Damen turned the tv off. 

“Stuff?” Damen asked chuckling as they got up. “Define  stuff !”

“Hmmm...” Laurent said as they clicked off lights. “Massages... foot rubs... baths...”

Damen laughed. “But I would do that  anyway !” They were walking towards the stairs now. 

“I know,” Laurent said and gave Damen what was supposed to be a playful spank except it was actually really hard. Laurent felt the sting on his palm and Damen was taken by completely surprise. Laurent laughed and took off running. As strong as Damen was, Laurent felt there had a good chance he might be faster. He raced up the stairs, Damen after him, a second or two later once the shock wore off. Laurent made it to the top and held on to the banister as he turned left, which Damen didn’t do and his feet slipped on the waxed floor and he nearly fell. 

Laurent noticed and laughed but didn’t slow down. Damen pushed forward, running as hard as he could after a quick recovery. Laurent ran into the bedroom first and turned and watched as Damen ran in breathless. Laurent squealed as Damen charged for him. He laughed as Damen threw him over his shoulder and down on the bed and he began to tickled Laurent mercilessly. 

Laurent’s laughter was the most beautiful thing Damen had ever heard. It was melodious and clear. He imagine a bright morning with chirping birds and gorgeous church bells ringing. It was bright and pure happiness and Damen felt a swelling of warmth in his chest as he realized he was the one that was making Laurent so happy. Because happy he was. He was playful and happy and carefree and Damen felt so proud to be the one with him. 

They began kissing again because they couldn’t help it. Because they were finally two lovers, free to do as they wish, with nothing to hide and nothing to steal their happiness. 

“I knew I wanted you but...” Laurent paused. 

“But?” Damen asked. 

“But  fuck ,” Laurent breathed closing his eyes. “I can’t get enough.”

Damen grinned and went for his lips again. Hands were all over warm skin and then they were naked. Naked and rolling on the bed, on top of the sheets, their bodies seeking each other’s warmth. And then Damen pulled Laurent on top. 

“Will you..?” He asked. 

Laurent felt a nervousness ribbon through him. “You want to?” Laurent asked in a husky whisper. The thought began to form in his head. Him... on top... his throat felt dry. He slid off. 

“Yes,” Damen said and turned onto his stomach. 

Laurent sat back and looked at Damen’s gorgeous body. He ran his hands up the back of Damen’s thighs and leaned down to kiss his lower back, traveling a little lower, kissing along the top of his backside. It’s not that Laurent didn’t want Damen, of course he did. It was just Laurent had never once let himself  want  him fully. Completely. He quickly realized just how much he wanted him, his body reacted at the gorgeous man presenting himself in front of him at that moment. 

Laurent reached for the lube. Heart and mind racing. His hands were trembling slightly. He poured some on his fingers. Damen curved his lower back, he bent his right leg, drawing his knee close to his body and opened himself up for Laurent. Laurent leaned in and kissed across his lower back again. He let his left hand run up the back of Damen’s thigh, cup his ass cheek and squeezed. Damen groaned and pushed his hips back. 

Laurent literally felt his mouth salivate. He kissed his ass cheek and then bit it gently. Damen groaned again. Laurent wanted, no,  needed  Damen. He slid his hand in and circled Damen’s entrance with his slicked fingers. Damen moaned slightly as Laurent slid a finger in. One became two and then three as Laurent softly stretched him. Laurent’s heart was pounding in his chest. Time seemed to stand still and yet race forward because suddenly Damen was saying he was ready and wanted  more . 

“Baby, now, more, please, more.”

Laurent felt as if this was not quite happening, as if he was somehow floating out of his body and yet had never been more aware of how everything felt. 

“Turn over,” he heard himself say. He remembered how good it had felt, the first time, looking up at Damen’s gorgeous face and loving eyes. How safe he had felt. He wanted to give Damen the same. Wanted him to feel the same safety and love. 

Damen did and Laurent settled between his legs and leaned down and kissed him. Softly. Gently. As Damen had kissed him so many times before. “You’re ready?” Laurent asked and Damen nodded. 

Laurent was up on his left arm. He lined his body up with Damen, the tip of his cock right as Damen’s entrance. He saw the slight trembling of Damen’s thighs. Laurent looked into his eyes. “I love you,” he whispered. 

“I love you,” Damen replied and then Laurent slid in. 

He was overwhelmed by how good it was. The hotness and tightness of Damen’s body. He leaned his forehead on Damen’s shoulder as he slid out and slid in again. Groaning. Panting. He kissed Damen’s skin. His arms were trembling as he slid out and then in again and with that thrust he was in all the way. He took a moment to compose himself. He pushed up and looked down at Damen. His heart swelled with so much love, he could hardly stand it. He had never imagined it would feel like  this .

He was moving before he knew. He tried to keep a steady pace, and not let his body be rough and erratic like it wanted to be. He took a few deep breaths and controlled himself. He looked down at Damen’s face, watched for any signs of discomfort and distress. “Is it good baby?” He asked. 

“Yes!” Damen whispered.“God! Yes! Yes!

Laurent grinned. He pushed back on Damen’s left leg and picked up the pace slightly, holding the back of Damen’s knee. Damen made the most gorgeous of sounds. The sounds he makes when he’s being fucked, Laurent realized and it made his cock harden further with pleasure. Damen reacted to the sensation with a deep moan. It was beautiful. It was perfect. 

Laurent moved in and out, wanting to remember each sensation, each moan and pant that Damen made. The way he closed his eyes and furrowed his brow only to open them and take a deep breath in. He looked gorgeous. Laurent kisses his lips, smiling at how Damen was writhing under him. Laurent became aware of a tensing in him. 

“Come, baby,” Laurent said, not knowing how much longer he would last. 

Damen reached for his leaking erection and stroked himself a few times. When he came, Laurent slid deep inside and looked on in amazement as he felt the deep quivering of Damen’s orgasm all around him. 

“Fuck me,” Damen said and Laurent obliged. He threw his whole body into it, letting go and releasing all the wanting and needing that had built up. When he came, his whole body felt it. He collapsed on Damen and laid perfectly still, mind foggy and he felt as if he could hardly breathe. 

He felt Damen’s warm hands on his back. 

“I’ve been dreaming of this for years,” Damen whispered between pants. 

Laurent felt himself smile. “It is yours whenever you want,” he answered and kissed his chest and closed his eyes, still not believing what had just happened. 


	47. XLVII

Sunday morning Laurent awoke feeling like a new man. Damen was turned on his side, facing away and Laurent pulled himself close to him. He slid his arm around him and pushed his chest to Damen’s back. He closed his eyes and took in Damen’s scent. He had always loved the way Damen smelled, it made him feel safe and loved. Laurent pressed his nose to Damen’s back and breathed in again. He felt Damen stretch. Laurent grinned as he kissed Damen’s muscular back and shoulders. Damen turned to face him. Grinning. 

“Last night was amazing,” Damen said in his husky morning voice. 

“Yes it was,” Laurent replied rubbing his chest. 

“Did you like it?”

“I loved it,” Laurent said, blue eyes blinking. Damen reached and swept some soft gold strands from Laurent’s forehead and tucked them behind his ear. Laurent smiled sweetly at the gesture. 

“My boyfriend is so fucking pretty,” Damen said.

Laurent blushed and grinned. “Shut up,” he said and pulled Damen to him and kissed him. 

“Can we spend all day in bed?” Damen asked. Laurent nodded and pulled him in for another kiss. 

They only got out of bed to eat. After a feast of cold cut sandwiches and fruit, Laurent took Damen’s hand and led him past the library to the music room. “I didn’t play while I was in France,” Laurent said taking one of his violin’s out of its case. 

“Why?” Damen asked. He was in his boxers and sat down on the loveseat in the room. Laurent was in sleep shorts. He had pulled on a baby blue button up that he had left open, his fit pale chest showing. The blue was so light it was almost white, but the gold of his hair and the sharp blue of his eyes picked up on the proper color of the shirt. 

“I played because I loved to, I was good at it.” Damen nodded. “But he pressured me into doing it more and more and then it didn’t become fun for a while.” Damen knew who he was. He didn’t have to ask. 

“Well no pressure now my love,” Damen said with a sweet smile. 

Lauren nodded as he placed the violin to his shoulder. He rested his chin on it and closed his eyes. He began to play and Damen smiled as he recognized the song Laurent had been playing the first time he met him. Damen got up and walked to Laurent, stepping behind him, placing his hands on Laurent’s hips and leaning forward, sweeping his hair back and kissing his neck softly. 

Damen felt as Laurent shook softly with laughter and kept trying to play. He gave up after a while. 

“Oh I’m sorry, I wanted you to keep playing!” Damen said with Laurent laughing and turning to kiss him. 

“Ok, then! Be good!” Laurent said and put the violin up to his shoulder again and began to play. He smiled and played and he felt Damen wrap his arms around him and felt his lips on his neck and the side of his face. Laurent closed his eyes and as he played, smiling. He had never been happier in his life. 

* * *

Monday morning, Damen had protested as Laurent had gotten up when his alarm went off. Laurent had smiled and looked down at him, sleepy eyes still half closed and a gorgeous smile on his lips. Laurent reached and caressed Damen’s face. 

“No complaining, I can’t be late, my love,” he said. 

“I know,” Damen said sighed as he kissed Laurent’s fingertips. 

Laurent had gotten up and had actually not wanted to shower. He didn’t want to wash the smell of Damen off him, but he figured no one at the hotel wanted to smell it so he showered and then got ready for work, leaving Damen with a kiss on his lips. He had told Damen to stay. 

“I’ll see you when I get home,” Laurent said. 

“Can’t wait,” Damen had replied. 

* * *

Laurent felt like a new man as he drove to work and walked inside. He understood that phrase completely now. The years he had spent finding himself had been a slow process. Reconnecting with Damen, although unexpected, also felt progressive. This past weekend had come after after six weeks of slow growing physical intimacy. But today, now, it felt new and sudden. Everything was somehow new but the same. It was a wonderful feeling. Laurent had never felt more himself. 

He greeted the staff as he made his way to his office. Monday’s always meant lots of phone calls and emails, especially now that it was summer, the hotels were busier than ever and problems always arose. Nothing Laurent couldn’t handle though. He had been doing this for a month now and each day he felt more and more sure in his leadership. 

He was in the midst of replying to the countless emails when there was a soft knock at his door. 

“Come in!” Laurent called out and looked up as Jord walk in. “Good morning!” Laurent said cheerfully. 

“Morning, Laurent,” Jord replied sullenly. 

Laurent furrowed his brow. “What’s the matter?”

“We have a situation,” Jord said. 

“What?”

“It seems the manager of the New York hotel has been stealing.”

Laurent felt his mouth hang open. “What?” 

Jord nodded. “This is something that your uncle started digging around in. It took a while but it seems we finally got the evidence we need.”

Laurent furrowed his brow. “My uncle was looking into him?”

“Well, at my suggestion. The accountant brought it to me and I told your uncle. He started looking into it, well more like gave the accountant more freedom to look into things and we now have the evidence.”

Laurent looked as Jord came round his desk and showed him. 

“It started with customer complaints,” Jord began. “Double charges on drinks and sometimes food and other extras.”

“So he would double charge the customer, pocket the money and then  if  the customer caught it they would be refunded by the hotel.”

“Yes, sir,” Jord said. “And not every double charge was caught.” Laurent shook his head as he felt anger begin to bubble inside him. “He seemed to take advantage of anyone who seem keen on ordering many extras. Large parties, especially corporate accounts.” 

Laurent felt his eyes widen as he looked at the copy of the customer receipt. “That’s almost $200 just from them!” He said. Jord nodded. “How did you know?”

“Well obviously things like the mini bar are done electronically. Anything manually entered we followed. We matched the times to when he was working. And,” Jord took a deep breath in and out. “Once we figured what he was doing we also kept cameras on him. We have three weeks of video surveillance where we have him manually entering the charges, and when it was an account he was over charging he was the one who would check them out, pocket the extra cash. The customer would get a receipt but he would void the charges in the system afterwards so the books would be balanced. Technically this is an issue in our system and we’re working on fixing it.”

“What if they paid with a credit card?” Laurent asked furrowing his brow. 

“He always made sure the extra charges were cash. Believe it or not, especially with the corporate guests, someone always had cash, and I’m sure with the receipt from the hotel, they would just go back to work and get their company to refund them.”

Laurent was incredibly angry now. The New York Hotel. Nicaise’s father. “He already gets paid  so  much more than almost all our other managers.”

Jord nodded with an unhappy expression. “That was your uncle. I don’t know why he paid him so much.”

Laurent knew. His stomach twisted. “He needs to fly here,” Laurent said. 

“Yes, he’s scheduled to be here in two days. He’s just been told it’s time for his annual evaluation. Funny enough it’s actually true.”

Laurent nodded. “You’ll have police standing by? He’s racked up enough.”

“Yes,” Jord said. “Yes I’ll take care of that.”

Laurent nodded. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, young sir. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Laurent said patting Jord’s forearm. “I appreciate all you do. Thank you Jord.”

With that Jord left and walked out of Laurent’s office. 

* * *

Laurent drove home later that day in a bit of a haze. From the moment Jord has left and had left Laurent to his thoughts, one had been circling around his head. Nicaise. Nicaise. Nicaise. 

Laurent sighed as he parked his car and walked into his home. 

“Hey!” Damen’s cheerful handsome face appeared and Laurent went to him, pulling him close and burying his face in Damen’s chest. “Bad day baby?” Damen asked. 

Laurent nodded. The whole situation exhausted him but he wanted to tell Damen. He needed too.

“Hungry?” Damen asked. Laurent shook his head. “Wanna change into something comfy?” Damen asked and Laurent nodded. 

Damen put his arm around Laurent and led him upstairs, Laurent leaning on Damen. He was so warm and smelled so good and Laurent felt everything would be ok. Such was the safety Damen made him feel.

Once in the bedroom, Damen lovingly helped Laurent undress. He gently kissed and held Laurent as he did so. Laurent loved how taken care of he felt. Once undressed, Laurent pulled on a shirt and shorts and Damen and he settled on the bed, Damen’s arms wrapped around Laurent, Laurent curled up in Damen’s chest. 

“Tell me what’s wrong baby,” Damen asked gently. 

“One of the hotel managers has been caught stealing. In two days he’ll come to the office here with the impression he’s getting his yearly evaluation and he’ll be arrested for theft.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Damen said running a warm palm down Laurent’s back and kissing his forehead. “Which hotel?”

Laurent took a deep breath in. “New York,” Laurent replied softly. 

Damen froze for a second. “Nicaise’s father.”

“Yes.” Laurent closed his eyes. Damen kept rubbing his back in a soothing way. “He... I should tell him. I should break the news. No one else.”

Damen nodded and furrowed his brow as he thought of the predicament. “Is... will he act ok, you think? It’ll be a shock. I don’t want him overreacting and causing you trouble.”

Laurent had thought of this. “I’m sure I can deal with however he reacts. I just.. I just don’t know how... when...”

Damen nodded. He stayed silent a moment. “Can you have him go to the hotel? Can you have him in another office? Then the moment his father gets taken away, you can tell him?”

Laurent thought of this. He nodded slowly. “That sounds like a possible way to do this,” Laurent said. He sat up and looked at Damen. “Thank you,” He said leaning in and kissing Damen. 

Damen smiled and caressed Laurent’s cheek. “Anything for you, my love.”

Laurent couldn’t help but smile. They began to kiss more and for the first time since the morning, Laurent felt at peace. 


	48. XLVIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Hello darlings! Back with more! Laurent is ready to break the news to Nicaise about his father. Enjoy! <3_

Laurent was in his office the following day. He had run through what he felt were all the possible scenarios in his head. He felt there was only one way to go about it. He picked up his cell phone and called Nicaise. The phone rang and rang until he was sent to voice mail. 

“Nicaise, hey it’s Laurent.” Laurent took a deep breath in and out. “Listen, there is something really important I wish to discuss with you. If you could come by the hotel tomorrow. Around 11 am? If that’s alright with you, text me back or give me a call. It’s important so... hope to hear from you soon. Bye.”  He hung up and waited. There was nothing else he could do. 

He was leaving work when his cell phone rang. He answered it as he slid into the driver’s seat of his car. 

“Hey!” He answered. 

“Hi,” Nicaise replied. “You rang?”

“Yeah, you heard my message.”

“I did. Yeah that’s fine. Can we make it 11:30? I’m meeting my beloved father for lunch. He’ll be at your hotel. I’m surprised you wanted to see me at 11, he said he was meeting up with you and wouldn’t be done til lunchtime.”

Laurent felt his heart thump in his chest. “Oh, I don’t think it’ll be that long really. Maybe he and my uncle were used to long, useless meetings. I’m not that type.”

Nicaise chuckle. “No Laurent I’m sure you’re not that type.”

Laurent furrowed his brow. “So tomorrow at 11:30?” 

“Yeah, see you then.”

“Ok, see you then.”

* * *

Laurent brushed his teeth absentmindedly as he was getting ready for bed. He was down to his boxer briefs and he was running things though his head. 

“Nicaise, your father is a thief,” he imagine himself saying. He had no idea how Nicaise would react. 

“Hey,” Damen whispered. Laurent looked up at the mirror. He began to smile as he watched and felt Damen slide his large, warm palms around his abdomen, gently kissing up his neck and nipping at his left earlobe. “No overthinking anything baby,” Damen said. 

Laurent rinsed out his mouth and turned in Damen’s arms, wrapping his own arms around Damen’s broad shoulders, running his palms along the muscles, caressing him and sliding his arms around Damen’s neck. Damen smiled warmly down at Laurent before leaning in and pressing their lips together.

They pulled apart slightly, Damen pressing his forehead to Laurent’s. “May I take your mind off things?”

Laurent’s face warmed and his body reacted to Damen’s words. “Damianos,” Laurent whispered. 

“Yes?” Damen answered. He softly kissed Laurent. “Don’t think,” he said. 

He reached down and cupped Laurent’s ass. Without thinking, Laurent pulled himself up, wrapping his legs around Damen. Damen held him close as they kissed and walked Damen them towards the bed. Laurent’s tongue assaulted Damen’s mouth, sliding in and out hungrily. Before he knew it, he felt the world tilt as Damen climbed the bed and laid Laurent down on it. 

Laurent pushed himself to the middle of the bed, pulling Damen with him. He groaned when the weight of Damen fell down on him. It felt good. It felt right. They were both groaning now, bodies pushing together, both seeking friction. 

They didn’t speak, they didn’t have to. Laurent reached down, fingernails scratching Damen’s skin and he pushed the waistband of this boxer briefs down, over his ass, Laurent’s hands sliding up, grabbing Damen’s backside pushing his hips down as Laurent placed his feet flat on the bed, pushing his pelvis up, both again groaning as their erections rubbed together through the thin fabric of their boxer briefs. 

Damen pushed up slightly, quickly shedding his boxer briefs. As he reached over Laurent’s head, where they had the lube under the pillow, Laurent finished undressing and turned onto his stomach. He pushed up on his knees, down on his elbows. Damen draped his body over him, kissing Laurent’s shoulders, nipping at his neck. 

Laurent pushed his body back, pressing his knees into the mattress, grabbing fistfuls of blankets, feeling Damen’s large warm palms slide down his hips and gripping his thighs, fingertips digging into Laurent’s sensitive skin. Laurent groaned as Damen entered him. He whimpered as his body stretched, Damen wrapped an arm around his waist, reaching down and taking hold of Laurent’s hard on. He ran his thumb over the slit, spreading the wetness around the head. Laurent hissed with pleasure, he closed his eyes and lost himself to all he was feeling.

Damen began to move. He was very slow, letting Laurent’s body adjust to him. He was murmuring words into Laurent’s skin, between kisses and soft licks. Laurent was vaguely aware of what he was saying, he was feeling overwhelmed by how wonderful his body felt. Damen was pleasing all of him. 

He felt Damen stroke his whole length, down then back up, Damen’s thumb, again, spreading his wetness. This slow, soft lovemaking went on for a moment and then Damen began to move with more purpose. Laurent felt himself being pressed down onto the mattress, Damen’s chest was against his back. Laurent spread his knees further apart, he wanted Damen in as deep as possible. 

He moaned, groaned, whimpered and softly cried out as Damen slid all the way in then almost all the way out, leaving only his tip in. Laurent’s whole body felt as if it was on fire, every nerve came alive under Damen’s administrations. He loved how Damen made him feel, how perfect his body was for him, in him, and all around him. 

Laurent felt Damen slide all the way out, turned him onto his back and then entered him again. Damen was controlled for as long as he could be, Laurent felt the tension in all his muscles. Finally, Damen too let go. He held Laurent tight and fucked him, crying out in ecstasy as his orgasm over took him and he filled Laurent’s body with his released. Laurent came as Damen rode out his orgasm. They laid in bed, clinging onto each other, as if they were the last two people on earth. 

* * *

Laurent looked out his window and then at his watch. It was 11:26 am.

The meeting with Nicaise’s dad has been... uncomfortable. Laurent had had Jord in the office and they began as if it was a normal yearly evaluation. Once that was almost done, Laurent had pulled out the paper work Jord had spent months compiling, all the proof to his theft. It had taken Nicaise’s father a moment to realize what was going on. He stayed quite and said nothing. He just told Laurent he needed to contact his lawyer. The police they had called had come in and handcuffed him. He was on his way to the police station now. 

Laurent heard a soft knock on his office door. “Come in!” He called out. He turned as his secretary poked her head in.

“Mr. De Vere there is a young -“

“Yes, yes, let him in,” Laurent said. He thought of sitting down at his desk but that felt too cold for the news he was about to deliver Nicaise. He looked towards the door as it opened and Nicaise walked in. 

He was in black distressed jeans and black leather ankle pull on boots. He had a gray button up, the top buttons open and his chest slightly exposed. He had one of his scarfs on, a dark gray one with silver threads woven into it here and there. His dark curls just enough of wild to make them look windswept yet they looked perfectly messy. His blue eyes were fixed on Laurent. 

“Morning,” he said with a wide smiled. 

Laurent smiled back and took a deep breath in, willing his heart and breathing to slow. He had to keep it together. This was important. 

“Morning, Nicaise. Thank you for coming.”

“Of course,” Nicaise said. He sat down and crossed a leg, ankle over knee. “I’m curious to what this is about.”

Laurent nodded and walked over to the front of his desk, leaning back against it. He figured there was no point in beating around the bush. “Nicaise...” he began. He looked right into Nicaise’s eyes. “I’m truly sorry, your father had to be taken into custody. He was stealing from his hotel in New York.”

Nicaise sat frozen a moment. “Oh,” he said softly. “Oh, I see.”

“I’m truly sorry,” I said. Laurent’s heart was thumping against his chest. “Nicaise I thought it... well there is no good way to break this news but I thought if you maybe heard it from me first -“

“You did this?” He asked furrowing his brow.

“I didn’t  do  this no,” Laurent said furrowing his own brow. “ He  did this and now he’s paying the consequences.”

Nicaise looked pale. He nodded. “I should -“ His phone rang interrupting him. “Hello?” He closed his eyes and nodded. “Alright. Alright. Yeah, I’ll... I’ll be right there.” He hung up his phone. “I have to go,” Nicaise said getting up. 

“Nicaise,” Laurent said and reached out, grabbing Nicaise’s shoulder. He jerked back, as if Laurent’a touch hurt him.

“I have to go,” he repeated, without making eye contact. Laurent watched Nicaise as he walked out of his office, closing the door behind him.


	49. XLIX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _After this chapter just six more left... I have loved writing this! Hope you all enjoy! <3_

Laurent heard nothing from Nicaise for several weeks. Any calls went to voice mail and all texts went unanswered. Of course, Damen was concerned as well, and tried to console Laurent as much as possible. 

“He just needs time, baby,” Damen said softly one night. They were back at Damen’s apartment. Laurent loved being here and in Damen’s bed. It was warm and comfortable and so inviting. He let Damen wrap his arms around him and rub his back. Laurent nodded and nuzzled Damen’s neck. 

It wasn’t until the weekend of the 4th of July that Laurent’s phone suddenly rang. Laurent and Damen were packing as they were planning to spend the weekend in the Hamptons with Erasmus and Nik. Auguste and Ada would be in Ada’s family cottage. 

Laurent looked up startled as his phone rang. He knew Auguste was already on the road and although it would be a busy weekend for the hotels, and he and Jord would be in constant contact with managers, it still felt odd to have a call from them this early on. Laurent walked over to Damen’s dresser where his phone was and he let out an huffed breath when he saw who it was. 

“Hello?” Laurent answered. 

“Hey, Laurent. It’s Nicaise.”

“Yes. I know. I’ve been calling you for over two weeks Nicaise.” Damen looked up at Laurent as he spoke. 

“Yeah... yeah I know. Listen I’m sure you’re going off for the weekend. You going up to the Hamptons?”

“Yeah, Damen and I will be at Nik’s.”

“Can I... can I drop by? So we can just talk.”

“Sure,” Laurent said.

“Ok, I’ll call you.”

“Alright,” Laurent replied. They said their goodbyes and hung up. Laurent looked at Damen who raised his brows expectantly.“He said he would drop by over the weekend so we could talk,” Laurent told Damen. 

“Ok,” Damen said walking to Laurent. He wrapped him in a warm, tight hug and kissed his forehead. “You ok?” He asked. 

Laurent smiled as he melted into Damen. “With you, always.”

* * *

Laurent tried not to think about Nicaise on the drive up. He and Damen chatted and joked around but when they feel silent, he felt a heaviness in his chest. 

“You’re worried aren’t you?” Damen asked. 

Laurent sighed. His old self would have said no and acted like he didn’t care in any way about any one but... he and grown since then. “I am,” Laurent said quietly. He swallowed and balled his hands up into fists. He looked at Damen. He could tell Damen anything. He knew he could. He wanted to... Laurent hadn’t lied but... he hadn’t told Damen everything either. “My uncle...” Laurent began softly. He watched as Damen’s eyes widened and his body stiffened. Damen understood. 

“No!” Damen whispered glancing at Laurent. 

Laurent nodded. “Nicaise was 12. He told his father and... and his father took money from my uncle and accepted a job. And then they swept it under the rug.”

Laurent looked out the window at the scenery rushing by. He felt Damen reach for his hand. Laurent entwined their fingers together. Damen drove silently for a while and Laurent decided to stay quiet until he processed what Laurent had just said. It took a while for Damen to finally speak. 

“I’ve never wanted to hurt someone so badly,” Damen said shaking his head. “12 years old...” Laurent stayed silent. “That’s just 2 years older than the kids I teach,” he said. 

Laurent glanced at him. He nodded. They said nothing as they drove on for awhile. His hand grew warm and sweaty in Damen’s but he didn’t want to pull back and Damen didn’t seem to want to let go either. 

When they finally reached Nikandros’s home, Laurent felt tired. Erasmus came out and hugged them in greeting. 

“You ok?” He asked looking at Laurent. 

Laurent nodded and gave him a small smile. Damen took their overnight bag in, saying a quick hi to Erasmus and then he and Nik said hi excitedly, slapping each other’s backs. 

“FYI, frat bros will be by later. Nik already has the grill going,” Erasmus told him. 

Laurent nodded. “Nicaise will drop by. Is that ok?”

“Yeah!” Said Erasmus, looking a bit surprised. He and Laurent walked to the kitchen and Laurent helped here and there. He kept looking at his watch and phone, checking the time or to make sure he hadn’t missed a text. “Is everything ok?” Erasmus asked again. 

Laurent had already told Erasmus about what had happened with Nicaise’s father. Laurent gave a nod. “Just... haven’t talked to Nicaise since that day. Guess I’m kind of nervous.”

“Well, don’t be, you know? You did what you had to. If Nicaise wants to be angry or upset it should directed it at his father.”

Laurent nodded again. “Well, it’s just me being nervous. Nicaise hasn’t been... anything. We haven’t talked.” Erasmus nodded and gave Laurent a sympathetic look and wrapped his arm around his shoulders, pulling him close. 

A couple of hours later, Nik and Damen’s frat brothers began to arrive. Laurent and Erasmus greeted and hugged them all. Laurent stayed vigilant of the front door. Finally a call. Nicaise said he would be there in 15 minutes. The home was full of guest. When Laurent told Erasmus Nicaise was on his way. Erasmus told him to take Nicaise to Nik’s office to have a quiet place to talk. 

Laurent did just that. He spotted Nicaise driving down the winding driveway to the home and opened the door before he knocked on it. Nicaise quickly saw the large group of people. Damen was across the large living space and raised his hand in hello and gave Laurent an understanding nod. 

Laurent escorted Nicaise down to Nik’s office. Finally they were alone in the quiet room. 

“Looks like quite the party,” Nicaise said, walking into the large office and settling on a large leather chair. He gestured to the leather chair beside him. Laurent went and sat, crossing his legs. 

“It’s always quite a party with a bunch of frat boys,” Laurent said lightheartedly. 

Nicaise nodded and took a deep breath in and out. “Thanks for agreeing to see me.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Laurent asked with a smile. 

Nicaise raised a perfect dark eyebrow and shrugged. “A number of reasons.”

“No, none that I can think of,” Laurent replied. 

Nicaise relaxed a bit into the chair and gave Laurent a tired looking smile. “Laurent... first of all, thank you. For caring. And... all that.” Laurent nodded. “Look I’m not good at this shit,” Nicaise said leaning over, putting his elbows on his knees. “But I know you tried your best to ease the blow... and...”

“You’re ok?” Laurent asked. 

“Yeah!” Nicaise replied nodded. He leaned back into the chair and ran a hand through his dark curls. “Yeah... I... the lawyer helped me take care of things financially also. For once my father did something smart and had opened up accounts in my name. Well, smart or was expecting to be charged with something criminal one day.” Nicaise shrugged nonchalantly. “So, I’m not homeless. Although I am selling the home because I have no good memories of it.”

“Yeah I understand,” Laurent said. 

Nicaise glanced his way. “I’m thinking about moving. The band and I talked to this guy and he’s interested in signing us to a record deal. But it’ll mean going to England.”

“Wow!” Laurent said with a wide smile. “That would be great!”

Nicaise grinned back and nodded. “I think so. Could be a new start, you know?”

“Yeah,” Laurent replied. 

“I should get going,” Nicaise said suddenly. 

“You sure?” Laurent asked. “You could stay! You could -“

Nicaise looked surprised, but only for a second. “Nah. Don’t wanna intrude.” He stood up and Laurent did as well. “Listen, again, thanks. I mean you show concern and you don’t have to, you don’t owe me anything -“

“Hey,” Laurent said. He felt a swelling in his chest of so many things he wished to say to Nicaise. Laurent had now become so much comfortable with sharing his emotions. He took a step towards Nicaise and put a hand on his bicep. “I’m sorry,” Laurent said simply. “I know it doesn’t change anything, erase anything but you deserved better. I’m sorry.”

Nicaise stood still a moment and then pulled Laurent in for a hug. Laurent wrapped his arms around him. They held each other for a while and Laurent closed his eyes. He let his embrace say everything else he wished he could put into words. When Nicaise pulled back he let a breath out at seemed to release all the tension in his body. He nodded. 

Laurent turned and they walked back to the front door. Laurent stepped outside behind Nicaise and walked him to his car. The sun was setting, the sky was orange and the sound of crickets and the ocean in the distance was a calming combination. 

Nicaise opened his driver’s side door. He looked around and his eyes finally landed on Laurent. “I often wonder what it would have been like if...”

Laurent nodded, understanding it all. “That’s a bottomless pit.”

Nicaise nodded in agreement. “I’ll see you around,” he said with a half smile. 

“I’ll always be here,” Laurent said. “Ok?”

“Ok,” Nicaise said with a cute half smile that reached his eyes and made them sparkle. He got into his car and turned the engine.

Laurent took a couple of steps back and watched as Nicaise back up and right before he turned and waved as Nicaise raised a hand off the steering wheel. Laurent stood in place a moment, even after Nicaise’s car was gone. As it darkened, the lights in the front yard came on. 

“Hey,” Laurent heard from behind him. He felt Damen’s hands on his waist and then slide across his abdomen. Damen kissed the side of his head. “How’d it go?”

“Good,” Laurent said as he turned in Damen’s arms. Laurent stood on his toes to kiss Damen’s lips. 

“You hungry?” Damen asked. 

“Starving,” Laurent said. Giving him a few more kisses. “Come on, let’s go inside.” Damen nodded and they walked back into the house, holding hands. 


End file.
